Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,198,149 members, 7,967,265 topics. Date: Saturday, 05 October 2024 at 03:05 PM

How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House - Family (4) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House (31179 Views)

How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House Part 2 ( My Wife's Response) / My Wife And Inlaws From Imo State Can Do Anything To Japa / Save Me From Entitled Inlaws (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by Bukfab(f): 2:58pm On Jun 16
Most of u men or guys advising him to meet with his MIL can't do it oooo .
Sir,the only person that can sort dis is the wife ,the hubby shuld sit the wife down and explain to her,the wife is in the best position to meet with her family..
IN EVERYTHING U DO, DON'T FACE UR IN-LAWS,BECOS THEY WILL TAG U HAS BAD PERSON AND WONT FORGIVE U,LET THEIR CHILD FACE THEM .

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by sexy74(m): 2:59pm On Jun 16
Wakatumbit:
My wife gave birth and her mom has been staying with us for the past 3 months, we have dedicated our baby already and my wife has even learnt to bath the baby and do things by herself when it comes to the baby.

I don't have an issue with the mom staying with us but ever since she came my wife's siblings has been coming to the house, her elder brother and sister and sometimes they stay up to a week.

With the two of them that makes us five in the house and feeding five people in this economy is not easy. I just looked at my bank statement this evening and in the last 2 weeks I've spent over 250k on expenses, from feeding to fuel, to baby food. If it's just me and my wife we won't be spending that much.


I'm thinking of telling my wife to tell her brother and sister to go leaving only they mom and they shouldn't be coming at all, they can visit but they shouldn't stay.

My family doesn't come around a lot and when they do visit, they don't even stay the night.

But I don't want to make it look like I'm a bad person, so how do I chase them away codedly
The earlier you become the bad person the better for you, but do with with wisdom

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by maxdosh(m): 2:59pm On Jun 16
If you are afraid of looking like a bad person, get ready to keep spending even more money. They know what they are doing, do you think they don't know that e sure for them that you will feed them when they come? Because of course, you have no choice as you are now their sister's husband.

Oga this is not the time to be doing smell smell. You have to tell your wife and mom in law to speak with them, if they are adamant, speak to your inlaws directly and if they refuse to see things with you, oga take charge, its your rules because its your house.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by Chizy12345: 3:00pm On Jun 16
feed them once in a day at 4pm. they will use indirect way and leave your house

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by lilyheaven: 3:00pm On Jun 16
Lalami3232:
While others are advising you rightly and wrongly, let me use this medium to enlighten my fellow men nationwide with the good news. OP did you meet her as a virgin? If NO, then the sentence below is also for you.

Oga if you no meet your wife as a virgin, oga go for DNA test oooooo because boreholes aka non-virgins can't be trusted atall atall
DNA law, you didn’t hear money to feed in-laws have finished?

😄😄
I’m just wondering how he is feeling about it.
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by tony0806: 3:02pm On Jun 16
Tell your wife that you'll like her to visit mums place (village or anywhere mum stays). Look for leave from your place of work so you can have 1 week to stay off the radar. If she agrees to travel home with the mum, you have eased yourself. As soon as she's traveling, let her tell the siblings that you are leaving town too.

So your responsibility will only be for you to be sending up keep to her.


Wakatumbit:
My wife gave birth and her mom has been staying with us for the past 3 months, we have dedicated our baby already and my wife has even learnt to bath the baby and do things by herself when it comes to the baby.

I don't have an issue with the mom staying with us but ever since she came my wife's siblings has been coming to the house, her elder brother and sister and sometimes they stay up to a week.

With the two of them that makes us five in the house and feeding five people in this economy is not easy. I just looked at my bank statement this evening and in the last 2 weeks I've spent over 250k on expenses, from feeding to fuel, to baby food. If it's just me and my wife we won't be spending that much.


I'm thinking of telling my wife to tell her brother and sister to go leaving only they mom and they shouldn't be coming at all, they can visit but they shouldn't stay.

My family doesn't come around a lot and when they do visit, they don't even stay the night.

But I don't want to make it look like I'm a bad person, so how do I chase them away codedly
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by lilyheaven: 3:02pm On Jun 16
Chizy12345:
feed them once in a day at 4pm. they will use indirect way and leave your house
😃😃😃
I think he should just ask his wife to follow his mom home and continue the omogho there.
He will come and pick them up when he is done with the business he is doing

2 Likes

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by IdeasYapayaski: 3:04pm On Jun 16
If truly you used your hard earned money to pay her dowry and every, you will not ask us what to do with shameless in-laws.🤣😂🤣

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by greypencils: 3:06pm On Jun 16
Wakatumbit:
My wife gave birth and her mom has been staying with us for the past 3 months, we have dedicated our baby already and my wife has even learnt to bath the baby and do things by herself when it comes to the baby.

I don't have an issue with the mom staying with us but ever since she came my wife's siblings has been coming to the house, her elder brother and sister and sometimes they stay up to a week.

With the two of them that makes us five in the house and feeding five people in this economy is not easy. I just looked at my bank statement this evening and in the last 2 weeks I've spent over 250k on expenses, from feeding to fuel, to baby food. If it's just me and my wife we won't be spending that much.


I'm thinking of telling my wife to tell her brother and sister to go leaving only they mom and they shouldn't be coming at all, they can visit but they shouldn't stay.

My family doesn't come around a lot and when they do visit, they don't even stay the night.

But I don't want to make it look like I'm a bad person, so how do I chase them away codedly
These are things you should have discussed with your wife before getting married. And having discussed with her, you still take certain decisions such as what I did. I personally refused to rent anything bigger than a mini flat, one-bedroom even though my wife has been arguing that we go bigger accomodation-wise. I refused. E get why. I don't need extra space because extra space means extra people, extra people means extra expenses. Both my fam and her fam, I no wan see. Make everybody dey all right. I am not stressing you, nobody should stress me either.

3 Likes

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by Tunde25(m): 3:07pm On Jun 16
MarketDispatch:


Suggestion
If your wife was working, the simplest way to handle this issue is by having a discussion. Let your wife take care of only feeding (foodstuffs ) in the house, whilst you take care of bulk (rent, car purchase, school fees, baby items etc and sundry (dstv, internet, PHCN, drinks) payments.

With your wife taking care of feeding, you won't worry about extra mouths you are complaining of

Are you sure the wife will spill/share the bills? What if she doesn't agree?
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by lilyheaven: 3:07pm On Jun 16
Wakatumbit:
My wife gave birth and her mom has been staying with us for the past 3 months, we have dedicated our baby already and my wife has even learnt to bath the baby and do things by herself when it comes to the baby.

I don't have an issue with the mom staying with us but ever since she came my wife's siblings has been coming to the house, her elder brother and sister and sometimes they stay up to a week.

With the two of them that makes us five in the house and feeding five people in this economy is not easy. I just looked at my bank statement this evening and in the last 2 weeks I've spent over 250k on expenses, from feeding to fuel, to baby food. If it's just me and my wife we won't be spending that much.


I'm thinking of telling my wife to tell her brother and sister to go leaving only they mom and they shouldn't be coming at all, they can visit but they shouldn't stay.

My family doesn't come around a lot and when they do visit, they don't even stay the night.

But I don't want to make it look like I'm a bad person, so how do I chase them away codedly
If your wife is not working,
Tell her you would like her to follow her mom home, that you want to do some interior design in the house,, you will come and pick her and the baby up when you are done

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by otokx(m): 3:10pm On Jun 16
This is what most Nigerian men go through, the way they eat food in your house they can never eat the same quantum in their own houses, your wife by the way will never agree so you better take charge and read the riot act.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by chidodoicon: 3:10pm On Jun 16
[center][/center] you should be happy that your in-laws like you and your home, it's a blessing to you, just pray for God's provision and you will never lack

1 Like

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by WayoProphet: 3:10pm On Jun 16
Just go buy a very long sharp cutlass and come out naked brandishing the cutlass. You will see how fast they will take to their heels. Come back and thank me.
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by 3rdeyeNigeria: 3:11pm On Jun 16
What kind of funny post is this

You should talk your wife simple. It's her responsibility to talk to her siblings "normally".

Your wife should know your family capacity and planning.

If you can't reason with your wife you are not ready for marriage.

Also, if you are so worried about being seen as a bad person, you will be seen as a weakling.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by KossyKiss97(f): 3:11pm On Jun 16
Have a heartfelt conversation with your wife, and let her know the implication on this on your finances. Let her be the one to speak to her family members directly and not you.
Usually, these issues are best discussed before marriage, so that before situations like these arise, they are already nipped in the bud.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by wizrose(m): 3:13pm On Jun 16
its better you talk your mind before her family leave you broke, bro call your wife privately and explain things to her, am sure understanding wife will no what to do about that.. its better to say your mind now bro na their daughter you marry no be them you marry contry hard them self use style come chop at list one day done do before you no it now they will start bringing their bag one after the other no time for rubbish abeg chase them away codedly through your wife

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by Bukfab(f): 3:14pm On Jun 16
Sapasenator:
Talk with your wife first, give her two days to talk to her mom. If she refuses, sit your MIL down and talk to her....

Erm....mama, I really appreciate your help with the omugwo and don't know how I and my wife would have survived without your help, thank you ma.

It is now up to three months and I think my wife and I are able to carry on from here. I want to ask when you are leaving so we can adequately prepare for you....... something along that line.

With inlaws, be polite and firm and most importantly, never to be afraid to express your mind.

The wife shuld speak not the hubby,but if she can't do dis for u,dat means she's wicked.

I am a woman nd i can speak on behalf of my hubby to my family oo ...Na hubby wey get money in-laws knw ooo
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by Nicoddemus(m): 3:14pm On Jun 16
FreeSpirited:
Plan a fake travel or conference together with ur wife...tell them ur family have to travel....they should have sense with this scope and fly out of ur life. Ur wife has to support u on this or else it won't work...
.
2nd scope is to tell them directly that, your ability to take full responsibility of the house is becoming unbearable in this hard economy that ur earnings can not support more than 2 mouths at the moment coupled with expensive baby food, that u are resorting to borrow.......If u can do this second trips... they will respect ur manliness or boldness and won't take u for granted cos they know u wont take rubbish.

3rd scope......If the above 2 don't work,,,,,,then reduce the quality of food they cook and eat drastically...This scope is a silent scope....u dont need to explain to ur wife, just cook a fake story of how u no longer have enough cash...maybe work related or project related...make ur wife believe the fake story....
.
E.g if they use fish for stew, cut it to only egg.....reduce soup to once a week or once in two weeks....let them eat more of beans( give them garri with the beans instead of dodo+bread) cook vegetables soup without meat, instead use Shawa fish...lol....this may cause quarell with ur wife,,,don't shy away from the quarrel, infact welcome it and use the avenue to voice out on ur wife so that everyone will hear ur complain of lack of fund and have sense.....
.
Economy is hard, they are using u to chop free food..... grin...u have to be smart or die in silence grin

No more comments needed now you've finished work grin
Mod close thread now angry
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by OBTOREPA(m): 3:15pm On Jun 16
Wakatumbit:
My wife gave birth and her mom has been staying with us for the past 3 months, we have dedicated our baby already and my wife has even learnt to bath the baby and do things by herself when it comes to the baby.

I don't have an issue with the mom staying with us but ever since she came my wife's siblings has been coming to the house, her elder brother and sister and sometimes they stay up to a week.

With the two of them that makes us five in the house and feeding five people in this economy is not easy. I just looked at my bank statement this evening and in the last 2 weeks I've spent over 250k on expenses, from feeding to fuel, to baby food. If it's just me and my wife we won't be spending that much.


I'm thinking of telling my wife to tell her brother and sister to go leaving only they mom and they shouldn't be coming at all, they can visit but they shouldn't stay.

My family doesn't come around a lot and when they do visit, they don't even stay the night.

But I don't want to make it look like I'm a bad person, so how do I chase them away codedly
That's the problem of having more than 1bedroom flat, it make your visitors feel too comfortable .
Had it been they've been sleeping in the parlour, they wouldn't have tried that.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by Tee92(m): 3:17pm On Jun 16
Sapasenator:
let the man invite his mother and siblings and see if the wife is going to take it for just one month.
God bless you for this.
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by demoBaba: 3:17pm On Jun 16
windvane:
when I tell men that for you to be the head of a family is not only money,you must get craze.....You are doing good man,yet you are suffering inside of you.Most men enjoy being called a good man even when they are deep down silently suffering....all you need do is take like 3-5 shirts and pants and go stay at a friend's place,if they call you from home,tell them you are working far from home and you need to safe up,after a week come back home and still tell them you were not paid at work....they will leave one after the other


Best option so far.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by thatigboman: 3:18pm On Jun 16
Wakatumbit:
My wife gave birth and her mom has been staying with us for the past 3 months, we have dedicated our baby already and my wife has even learnt to bath the baby and do things by herself when it comes to the baby.

I don't have an issue with the mom staying with us but ever since she came my wife's siblings has been coming to the house, her elder brother and sister and sometimes they stay up to a week.

With the two of them that makes us five in the house and feeding five people in this economy is not easy. I just looked at my bank statement this evening and in the last 2 weeks I've spent over 250k on expenses, from feeding to fuel, to baby food. If it's just me and my wife we won't be spending that much.


I'm thinking of telling my wife to tell her brother and sister to go leaving only they mom and they shouldn't be coming at all, they can visit but they shouldn't stay.

My family doesn't come around a lot and when they do visit, they don't even stay the night.

But I don't want to make it look like I'm a bad person, so how do I chase them away codedly
wake them at 12 midnight, ask them to pack and supervise the packing. At 5am, wake them again, let them carry themselves and their properties and u take them to motor park, give then transport money and tell them goodbye and God bless.
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by zezebabs: 3:18pm On Jun 16
This is a delicate situation, the moment you discuss this matter with some women, they begin giving you attitude at home or even tell her mother directly..

You can imagine how his wife will react if the table turn around, if the husband mother, sister etc are staying with them, the house would be hot and not peaceful already.

You have to take a bold step, take your wife out like you want to have a private time with her, then begin the discussion, tell her you don't have enough money to continue taking care many people at the moment, her family member can come visit, not come and move to your house

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by NeckingNgulping(m): 3:18pm On Jun 16
FreeSpirited:
Plan a fake travel or conference together with ur wife...tell them ur family have to travel....they should have sense with this scope and fly out of ur life. Ur wife has to support u on this or else it won't work...
.
2nd scope is to tell them directly that, your ability to take full responsibility of the house is becoming unbearable in this hard economy that ur earnings can not support more than 2 mouths at the moment coupled with expensive baby food, that u are resorting to borrow.......If u can do this second trips... they will respect ur manliness or boldness and won't take u for granted cos they know u wont take rubbish.

3rd scope......If the above 2 don't work,,,,,,then reduce the quality of food they cook and eat drastically...This scope is a silent scope....u dont need to explain to ur wife, just cook a fake story of how u no longer have enough cash...maybe work related or project related...make ur wife believe the fake story....
.
E.g if they use fish for stew, cut it to only egg.....reduce soup to once a week or once in two weeks....let them eat more of beans( give them garri with the beans instead of dodo+bread) cook vegetables soup without meat, instead use Shawa fish...lol....this may cause quarell with ur wife,,,don't shy away from the quarrel, infact welcome it and use the avenue to voice out on ur wife so that everyone will hear ur complain of lack of fund and have sense.....
.
Economy is hard, they are using u to chop free food..... grin...u have to be smart or die in silence grin

Your 3rd scope is the real deal.
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by demoBaba: 3:18pm On Jun 16
Sapasenator:
The shit he is taking from his in-laws, the wife will not take half of that from the man's family members.

I'm telling you

1 Like

Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by ogbe88(m): 3:21pm On Jun 16
papyjaypaul:


This one is not matter of fight, life is not fair to men but we need to know how to mange the female species. When I was younger, papa used to tell me about women, then I was clinging on to women because women will always be partial. As a man, I can now see what he said. You have to handle women in their game.

This people will not stay there forever but let me tell you one thing, the moment you say one thing, that is what they will never forget and remember you for. They will not remember all the free feeding he was doing.

Are you saying that my family is hungry

Are we bothering you

Okay i will use my money.

The thing can turn anyhow. Imagine the family now buying their things or the guy sending them out claiming tough guy. I have had guys who did that, they sent family away, it never ends well. In laws are like boardroom politics, let him manage them well. They know themselves better than he thinks he knows them. A man must draw boundaries but in drawing boundaries, he should remember he still needs them in the future. This is just the first pregnancy.
U are not well.
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by Wrackcityoffici: 3:21pm On Jun 16
Reduce the ration...if you're giving your wife 50k monthly for house feeding, reduce it to 25k complaining about the economy, don't engage her family yet, let them have the understanding that you're struggling, stop trying to be a super hero... make everyone understands you're struggling without having to go direct, complain about business, economy as the reason...any sensible inlaw would leave...if they don't leave within the next week, engage them in a respectful manner...if they don't leave within the next week then violence is the only option left, as a man you should be ready to make hard decisions...the annoying thing is, your wife would probably have her own savings while you're drowning in bills, try to find a way to make your wife share financial responsibility, because she naturally won't understand how you feel if she's not directly affected
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by thatigboman: 3:21pm On Jun 16
Phranx1:
Calmly discuss with your wife, show evidence your income ain't as strengthening as your expenses so they should go truth be told this government strangulation is why they see your house as Eldorado.
all that one na long story. Even if he shows his wife bank statement showing the loan he collected to be feeding her family, she will insist they still stay. Just call the mother inlaw and tell her to carry her children and bounce from his house next day. No stories
Re: How Do I Chase Away My Inlaws From My House by happney65: 3:24pm On Jun 16
There is nothing to be calm about. Tell your wife to tell them not to come again,and if they don't change,you tell them yourself

I don't know why you people find it hard to say your mind and instead will be beating about the bush

Nonesense!

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (Reply)

Help With PHCN Wahala / Funny Ways Kids Pronounce Our Names. / Is It Right To Marry A Second Wife Since The First Couldn't Bear Me A Child?

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 79
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.