You may be wondering why you always end up with toxic people in your life; people who hurt you in a love affair and treat you without respect. If you are this person,your question would be,'why do I always attract the wrong people in my life?'

1) Lack of standard: by standard I mean sets of values and belief systems that defines the way you live. For Example,If you value your faith in God,you wouldn't want to settle with someone who doesn't believe in God or that blasphemes God.

This makes it easier for you to accept or reject potential partners based on the standards that you have set for yourself as you already know what you want and what you don't want. Values can include honesty, hardworking, kindness, playfulness or joviality, empathy, supportiveness etc when you don't set a standard for yourself you will attract just anyone around.

2) Low self esteem: We always attract the people that mirrors how we see or feel about ourselves. If you think you don't deserve a good man simply because people made you believe that you're not good enough,when such person shows up you will be afraid to accept them because you think you're not worthy of them. You will see yourself attracted to people who mirrors your condition.

A guy I know in NYSC camp many years ago was very popular and loved by the ladies in the orientation camp, despite having severe fire burns on his skin, he was funny and speaks so confidently. He didn't allow his condition to make him shy away from mixing up with people. He ended up marrying a beautiful lady who loves him. He had a healthy self esteem and that helped him attract the right person into his life. Change the way you see yourself and people will learn from you on how to treat you better.

3) When you don't know what you want. Is like going for shopping without making a list. You would end up buying things you don't need only for you to discover later that you have missed out the most important things. You attract the wrong person because you have not made up your mind on the kind of person you want. If you make up your mind on the kind of person you want,it will be easier to reject some proposals no matter how enticing it is.

4) Your lifestyle: people of similar values attracts. You can't dress like a gangster and wants a responsible lady to take you serious. You're addressed the way you dress. There's a way you'd dress as a lady and small kids would woo you. You can't be rude and impolite and expect to attract a good partner who values peace of mind.

The energy you give out is the energy that comes back to you.

5) Ostentatious display: when you engage in excessive affluent display of wealth, so Many kinds of people will be drawn to you, because of what you have or what you pretend to have. Adopt a moderate way of living that will not attract too many attention to you.

6) Environment: sometimes the quality of your environment will determine the quality of the people you will meet. Knowing that we are the product of our environment, should indicate to you the right environment to move to as to attract the right person. There could be exceptions to this rule,but it doesn't invalidate how much effect the environment plays on people.

7) Association: When you're friends with fools,it is still the same fools that will ask you out. Being intentional in making friends with the right set of people and belonging to the right association will increase your chances of being attracted to the right person.

[b]Bypassing the Friendship stage: [/b]Many people go straight into intimacy or marriage without becoming friends, simply because they believe time is against them, so they settle for whoever is available not desirable.

The friendship stage is a stage where you are just friends with them. No form of intimacy or sex, meaning if it doesn't work you can easily separate without losing anything. As friends you can get to know each other better and then decide if you're just mesmerized by their looks or you really like the person. People pretend a lot when you promise to marry them at the first date. But as friends they'll show their true colours because you're not in a hurry. For you not to attract the wrong partner first be friends with them in a non intimate affair.