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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. (20889 Views)
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She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Elizadath: 1:15pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
We met in schl. She was lucky to get a very good job while i am looking for one. She invested all she had on me. This is the 6th yr of this relationship. I have tried all means to cut her off but she won't let go. My problem is that i can't say it to her face that i am no more in love with her. Cos i dnt wnt to hurt her. Now i have found my dear love. She is asking for marriage but i can't marry her; i want to get married too (but, ) pls help me what do i do now am so confuse |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by ifyalways(f): 2:03pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
She invested in you while you were busy investing in small girls outside. She has sowed so therefore she must reap. . .from the same vineyard. May Amadioha punish anyone who thinks otherwise. 12 Likes |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Nobody: 2:27pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
AMEN AND AMEN |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by dinachi(m): 3:02pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
@ poster you never loved her. Love never appears and disappears. You are not a decent person. How can someone invest all she in you for six years and this is how you pay her back. You better chase away those small parasites around you and take your true love to the altar like a proper man should! Don't be an eternal fool, in these days when 70 percent of young girls are practising lesbians while the remainder are single moms and bisexuals you are extremely lucky to find a woman who put her money where her mouth is. Next time I see your thread let it be about your wedding to your babe of six years! 7 Likes |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by coogar: 3:38pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
Elizadath: may the gods shrivel your cöck! 4 Likes |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by obowunmi(m): 4:13pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
These responses are too hilarious, ahaha! |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by obowunmi(m): 4:17pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
OP: you certainly can't marry someone you don't love soooo, find a way to just vamoos from her life, Or better yet, keep wasting her time and hopefully she will get the message when she turns 40. Can you get your dear love pregnant ? |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by obowunmi(m): 4:22pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
Do you have money to pay her back for all the time and money invested ? If you can, do so. One must never marry someone they do not love, Reminds me of my friend, Ayo. He was with his girl for 8 years and felt forced and compelled to marry her. Barely 2 months after the big celebration, he goes out every night, Monday-Sunday looking for random girls to fcku, he describes his life as miserable, Here's to hopin to don't end up that way. Pay her back for all her services and marry the one you love. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Goldieluks: 4:41pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
ifyalways: Lol true. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by honeric01(m): 5:10pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
If you want to leave her, you must pay 10% interest on every 1 hour she invested on you. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Nobody: 7:01pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
@poster how can anyone help you when you have absolutely NO IDEA what YOU want?! i suggest you sit down and start by being honest WITH YOURSELF and discover what you want. YOU HAVE TO KNOW WHAT YOU WANT, BEFORE YOU CAN GET WHAT YOU NEED! |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Elizadath: 7:23pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
I made an attempt to pay her some money and she refused. The next thing she told me was ;'' if you love your self, dont try to go away from me cos you are going to die.'' i guess somebody is feeding her abt my intention. Her problem is dat she's too authoritative and she doesn't like my mum. Am really afraid. I dont want to die. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Nobody: 7:52pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
ifyalways: Ify, I'm with you on this one. ![]() This guy is really, really selfish, and just wants to take, and give nothing in return. He doesn't love this girl, yet it's taken him 6 freaking years to discover this, in which time he was quite happy to have her spend on him. The very sort of person I dislike, and can't stand. Only a cad would toy with someone's emotions the way he's done (and is still doing). ![]() 3 Likes |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Goldieluks: 8:16pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
Elizadath: Have you tried asking her why she doesn't like your mum? or is that an excuse to use to dump her? By the way what stopped you from ending the relationship like 2-3 years ago?i guess too much money. You would have ended it,knowing at the back of your mind that you don't love her as much as she loves you,now you have to carry your cross brov. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Nobody: 8:20pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
ten yrs down the line, this gal will be complaining why he hasnt married her after 10yrs of dating, and that he is evil etc (like that other thread) desperate women!!!! |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by debosky(m): 8:24pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
So if a man 'invests' in a woman or vice versa he/she is compelled to marry the other person? ![]() We might as well turn it into a business transaction. This should be a warning to all those 'investors' out there - don't 'invest' anything you aren't willing to lose. If you expect someone to marry you because you spend money on them, you are looking for trouble. 2 Likes |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by obowunmi(m): 8:43pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
I agree with you debo, such double standards, Its not by force to marry her. Pay her back for all her services and move on with your life, Many women dump men who has invested in them especially if this new hubby is a bigger fish with large pockets, All moral obligations to their investors go out the window. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Goldieluks: 8:53pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
obowunmi: It is not a must to marry someone you once dated,but take a look at the length of years she spent with him,hoping one day they would get married. I blame the girl for dating someone more than three years and still hoping he'll propose to her on the long run,and i also blame the guy for not ending it all on time,he wants to eat his cake and still have it. Life is not a like throwing a dice and getting away with whatever number that comes up with it,one have to pay for ones deeds,whether good or bad. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Nobody: 8:54pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
obowunmi: pay her back?! what for?! do you think women who dump the guy (who invested heavily in them), and then go and date the next big fish, give anything back?! there are NO OBLIGATION because thats what you get from buying love. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by dinachi(m): 8:58pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
@ poster stop clawing at straws! For six year a woman invested all she had on you according to you and you never hated her all this while you were enjoying the goods. Stop giving flimsy excuses. What has changed that made you to change your mind. We want to know! Because it is immoral to sap someone emotionally and financialy for six good years and start telling stories now. You cant justify your betrayal and selfishness. It won't work! If you were able to stay with her for six years without seeing these 'faults' of yours then you might as well marry her and keep doing what you were doing that prevented you from seeing those faults for six good years! This game of coming up with lame and flimsy excuses when you want to dump someone must stop! Have some dignity for Christ sakes! |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by kevoh(m): 9:01pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
Elizadath:Karma stings like a b.itch bro! Meanwhile get yourself an acid raincoat cos that's what you'll get when you eventually leave her! |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Nobody: 9:03pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
dinachi: so falling out of love is NOT an option in your world? as soon as the train is going, it can never be stopped? it doesnt matter WHAT/WHERE/WHY this guy doesnt want her any longer, the IMPORTANT fact is that he doesnt want to marry her. what kind of sorry a[b]s[/b]s people Nigeria is producing that they are willing to marry a person who dont give a damn about them?! and probably dont love them. oh lawd!!! |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by obowunmi(m): 9:07pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
LOL at MBJ, in naija, its marriage by fire, by force, lol. If you meet my friend Ayo, you will know, one shouldn't marry someone just because you've been with them for a long time, A.Y.O is a miserable man. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by dinachi(m): 9:34pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
AYO is a miserable man because he wants to eat his cake and still have it. @ MRbrownJAY the poster has not come out to really say why he is leaving her because very clearly he has no reason. Look I am against taking peoples emotions for granted. I can almost believe that the poster made some assurances to her that gave her the confidence to invest all she had on him. Dont be suprised he may also have proposed marriage to her. Let the poster come out clearly and tell us the true state of things. Remember there are two sides to a story. The poster knows he has really duped the girl emotionally, thats why he can't face her. @ poster, what has changed to make you change your mind? Come clean on this one, we are waiting for you! 1 Like |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by ifyalways(f): 9:53pm On Dec 04, 2011 |
Oh,the OP is out with the old lame excuse . . ."my mom does not like her".Did your mom just wake up or she like you,woke up and the love is lost ![]() If some of us wants to pretend that we don't know that in "Nigeria and perharps Africa" in general it is out of place and NOT accepted for a woman to invest "financially in a relationship(not marriage) then theres nothing worth discussing.A woman who goes out of her way to do such keeps it closely guarded and stands the risk of being labelled as "desperate and buying love" as its already suggested in this thread. Btw,i'm sure the girl was promised and assured marriage by the OP before she started investing. 7 years is a loooong time to live off someone,give her false hopes then come up with this poo story.OP,had it all planned out which to me is the height of wickedness.and he must be made to pay dearly. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Outstrip(f): 2:22am On Dec 05, 2011 |
What is sad is that if they are in Nigeria the poor girl might have a hard time gettiing married. If she has helped him financially for 6 year it means sshe would propbably be at least 30 years old. You cannot force someone to marry you but the poster is an Aa.ss for what he has done to this woman. She could have got out a lot sooner but there are still those people who still believe that there are still good people out there and see only the best in people. Unfortunately this our sister is one of them and she is about to learn a painful lesson 1 Like |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Outstrip(f): 2:25am On Dec 05, 2011 |
ifyalways: Wow. So his mom does not like her. I think it is a good thing that this girl should just dump the whole family. Where there is life there is hope. Why would she want to marry into a family were the mother sat back and let her son spend a young womans money that assumed that he would marry her. Geez. Please abeg a broken engagement is better than a broken marriage. Where was the mothers dislike when this woman was spending her money on him ![]() 1 Like |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Bawss1(m): 12:20pm On Dec 05, 2011 |
The woman, or anybody for that matter, must be a darn f[i]o[/i]ol to think that investing financially in a relationship should lead to marriage. Again this is another evidence of how marriage and love has been abused today. |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by obowunmi(m): 1:01pm On Dec 05, 2011 |
Well said Bawss1, true talk! |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by ifyalways(f): 2:01pm On Dec 05, 2011 |
No one is saying that investing financially in a relationship would guarantee marriage please.It's not rocket science to know that this lady invested 'cos shes been given full assurance of marriage by the OP. Naija girls,or rather a greater part of Naija girls are made to know(by the society,our mothers) that a woman should NOT invest cash in any relationship with a lover unless in marriage so before anyone invests,she must have been assured beyond doubt that she has a future with the man. OP,don chop clean mouth and suddenly wants to go with filmsy excuses.The girl might have made mistakes in the past(picking and brushing up his a55) But now?babes are not smiling.He must fulfil his end of the bargain. Many married that way and it turned out fine,some didn't work,fine but OP must finish what he started. Btw,this thread is an eyeopener indeed.I've come to realise that some men actually go into a relationship,make promises they don't intend fulfilling just so they'd ride on the woman's fortune to sucess.SMH 1 Like |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by obowunmi(m): 2:13pm On Dec 05, 2011 |
Ify, you sound like a wicked woman , abeg free the guy jooor! what do you mean by he "must fulfill the end of his bargain" Did he force the woman to invest in hiim ? |
Re: She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore. by Nobody: 2:32pm On Dec 05, 2011 |
Truth is, most women and men spend a lot on their partners not because they want something out of the relationship but done out of the generousity of their hearts. I had this friend of mine who used to call men that spent on her Mugus and I always told her then that not all of these men that spend on her are mugus, some don't do it because they wanna get something from you, they do it because they feel it is the right thing to do, they wanna take care of their partners and make their partners happy. Men buy cars for their Gfs and wives not to show off but because they are tired of watching their partners jump from danfo to okada daily. That person's comfort is their utmost priority. But along the line these men promise these women heaven and earth because the money is rolling in. I do not know if the OP promised the girl marriage before or after she started spending on him but one thing I know is this, if you waste someone's 365days x 6 and not fulfill the promises you made, you have to face and deal with whatever comes your way. It took this guy 6 years to come to the conclusion that she wasn't "good enough for him" and I think that's BS. Someone said pay her back everything she spent on him and I was like WTF? can you pay back the emotional connection? can you pay back the 6 solid years you took out of that person's life? Some of you think it's all about the finance, yes finance is part of it but come onnnnnnnnnn, 6 years is no joke. You cannot eat your cake and have it. @OP How old is she? I have always been against long courtship, it's just bloody useless to me. 1 Like |
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