This topic is strictly for the married men or men living under the same roof with their woman. I don't need the feminist opinion but rather men of intellectual capabilities that is in marriage or relationship living under same space with their woman.

I need to know men in the house, what's the sharing formula in your home, I mean, how do you share bills with your woman. I don't believe in this bad economy, it's only the man that take care of the home front financially except if the man is the likes of dangote or otedola. So my question is that at what ratio do you share the bill with your woman. In my previous marriage, I was forming a superman in the like of carrying all the whole financial responsibility in the home even though it was not easy...bills like house rent, school fee, feeding,clothing's, medicals, utility and etc. My ex wife was not working then and I didn't bother cos I can carry the load, at the end, she paid me back with cheating and infidelity in the guise that I don't give her much attention and blabla. See person I was hustling for to give her and the kids a better life, at that point, I understood that no matter what you do as a man, you can't satisfy the insatiable desire of a woman. Now I have been separated for years and moved on with another woman who we live together now. With my previous experience, I desist to carry all financial responsibility of the house and want her to also commit financially but I don't know how to come about it that won't lead to issue between us, I don't know how to do the sharing formula whether in the area of food, rent, utility bill, gas and etc. Once bitten twice shy and won't want to slave myself for any woman whatsoever again in the guise of marriage or relationship. So experienced married men, how do you do it with your partner that works for you. We both earn a reasonable pay and my thoughts are each month, we both should contribute a certain percentage of amount into an account that we are going to use in running the home front be it food,bills and utilities,gas. E.g Maybe 70k from my side and 50k from her end. That's like a 60/40 sharing formula, With this, I will still pay the house rent and energy and petty bills but the chunk of that amount goes to feeding. I will like to know if this is a good idea guys . I can't be suffering out there to provide for a woman that won't later appreciate your suffering and still cheat on you for flimsy excuse and us her own salary for Brazilian air and cream.

Personally I didn't define what responsibilities one takes. I am a senior federal government worker and my wife is a trader. I allowed her to contribute as she feels she can though sometimes I hala her small to make her contribute . In conclusion I can say I shoulder about 80% of the whole responsibilities

Good to know about how you run it, atleast she is doing 20% which is not a bad idea. I have really learn that even if you have the means as a man to carry all bills, you should allow her to also be responsible in some areas financially, is not for anything but for the future, the kids you both are training, she will also benefit from them even more than you the man, so why should the man be allow to kill himself because of family responsibility.. as a man, do your best and leave the rest. What I learned from your write up is that as a man, you should not defined the bills she should carry .. is there anything bad to define the bills your woman should carry.. e.g... telling her to be filling the gas and also doing some other things.

Samfloxin:
Personally I didn't define what responsibilities one takes. I am a senior federal government worker and my wife is a trader. I allowed her to contribute as she feels she can though sometimes I hala her small to make her contribute . In conclusion I can say I shoulder about 80% of the whole responsibilities

There shouldn't be any ratio, each partner should know what to handle and relieve the other from the burden. If we have to sit down and discuss ratio then I'm not doing, it simply means we have no strong bond.

I discovered women find it fault when you state to them to sort a particular bill, but to be honest, I don't see anything bad of that, it makes you have a conscious mindset to what you are supposed to do

EreluRoz:
There shouldn't be any ratio, each partner should know what to handle and relieve the other from the burden. If we have to sit down and discuss ratio then I'm not doing, it simply means we have no strong bond.

EreluRoz:
There shouldn't be any ratio, each partner should know what to handle and relieve the other from the burden. If we have to sit down and discuss ratio then I'm not doing, it simply means we have no strong bond.

I'm shocked to see you. So you didn't deactivate again?

EreluRoz:
There shouldn't be any ratio, each partner should know what to handle and relieve the other from the burden. If we have to sit down and discuss ratio then I'm not doing, it simply means we have no strong bond.

If you are ready to be giving me breast to suck everytime I will bear the bills 100%

Nonexisting1:
I'm shocked to see you. So you didn't deactivate again?

Deactivation button isn't working help me tell Seun to deactivate it for me

Afodot0022:
I discovered women find it fault when you state to them to sort a particular bill, but to be honest, I don't see anything bad of that, it makes you have a conscious mindset to what you are supposed to do

For me I don't like being assigned to any bill but trust me I'll be a big relief if there's need for it. I wouldn't be happy seeing someone I claim to love suffer and carry so much burden while I just relax and chill no no.

EreluRoz:
Deactivation button isn't working help me tell Seun to deactivate it for me

Say no more. I'm on my way now to call him to help you deactivate abeg. I'm tired of your shenanigans here already.

Something just so easy as long as you guys understand each other.

Individual have their roles to play. I do mine, you do yours and everything would be fine.

Being responsible is the major key here

Nonexisting1:
Say no more. I'm on my way now to call him to help you deactivate abeg. I'm tired of your shenanigans here already.

Please do so you can stop seeing my shenanigans

EreluRoz:
Please do so you can stop seeing my shenanigans

To deactivate your account is very easy. Just abuse all the mods together and see them given you like 10 years ban.

Issue solved

helinues:


To deactivate your account is very easy. Just abuse all the mods together and see them given you like 10 years ban.

Issue solved

I don't want my account to be banned but deactivated. Honestly Seun should attend to me. I need some break off here

60:40 is okay. I can't shoulder all the bills alone,I'm human abeg. After all at the end they benefit more from the kids.

This is your partner, why should being assigned bill payment be a problem but when. You are single you can single handedly pay all this bill but when you get marry you find it difficult to continue paying part of those bills.. this is so difficult to understand.

EreluRoz:
For me I don't like being assigned to any bill but trust me I'll be a big relief if there's need for it. I wouldn't be happy seeing someone I claim to love suffer and carry so much burden while I just relax and chill no no.

Afodot0022:
This is your partner, why should being assigned bill payment be a problem but when. You are single you can single handedly pay all this bill but when you get marry you find it difficult to continue paying part of those bills.. this is so difficult to understand.

I simply don't like the idea of being assigned any particular bill, just let me flow and I know when and where to come in.

EreluRoz:
I simply don't like the idea of being assigned any particular bill, just let me flow and I know when and where to come in.

So you wan spend your money alone? He nor good na. Lol

helinues:


To deactivate your account is very easy. Just abuse all the mods together and see them given you like 10 years ban.

Issue solved

I don't even know why he is calling the mods to deactivate his account when he can do it within a minute or two.

Cleanest way; let each person pay their way.

if it’s your home, let her pay for an amount equal to the costs of one room, or the space she occupies. Ditto for food, power.

This type of thing is best at the start of the relationship.

Sapasenator:


So you wan spend your money alone? He nor good na. Lol

You don't get me. Read my other responses

EreluRoz:
You don't get me. Read my other responses

I will read them.

Most women like shying away from immediate family financial responsibilities why?
Some prefer carrying financial responsibilities from their papa house than their husband own why?

User.

Afodot0022:
Good to know about how you run it, atleast she is doing 20% which is not a bad idea. I have really learn that even if you have the means as a man to carry all bills, you should allow her to also be responsible in some areas financially, is not for anything but for the future, the kids you both are training, she will also benefit from them even more than you the man, so why should the man be allow to kill himself because of family responsibility.. as a man, do your best and leave the rest. What I learned from your write up is that as a man, you should not defined the bills she should carry .. is there anything bad to define the bills your woman should carry.. e.g... telling her to be filling the gas and also doing some other things.

It is not wrong to define bills but it takes understanding and disciplined woman to stick to that consistently

Afodot0022:
This topic is strictly for the married men or men living under the same roof with their woman. I don't need the feminist opinion but rather men of intellectual capabilities that is in marriage or relationship living under same space with their woman.

I need to know men in the house, what's the sharing formula in your home, I mean, how do you share bills with your woman. I don't believe in this bad economy, it's only the man that take care of the home front financially except if the man is the likes of dangote or otedola. So my question is that at what ratio do you share the bill with your woman. In my previous marriage, I was forming a superman in the like of carrying all the whole financial responsibility in the home even though it was not easy...bills like house rent, school fee, feeding,clothing's, medicals, utility and etc. My ex wife was not working then and I didn't bother cos I can carry the load, at the end, she paid me back with cheating and infidelity in the guise that I don't give her much attention and blabla. See person I was hustling for to give her and the kids a better life, at that point, I understood that no matter what you do as a man, you can't satisfy the insatiable desire of a woman. Now I have been separated for years and moved on with another woman who we live together now. With my previous experience, I desist to carry all financial responsibility of the house and want her to also commit financially but I don't know how to come about it that won't lead to issue between us, I don't know how to do the sharing formula whether in the area of food, rent, utility bill, gas and etc. Once bitten twice shy and won't want to slave myself for any woman whatsoever again in the guise of marriage or relationship. So experienced married men, how do you do it with your partner that works for you. We both earn a reasonable pay and my thoughts are each month, we both should contribute a certain percentage of amount into an account that we are going to use in running the home front be it food,bills and utilities,gas. E.g Maybe 70k from my side and 50k from her end. That's like a 60/40 sharing formula, With this, I will still pay the house rent and energy and petty bills but the chunk of that amount goes to feeding. I will like to know if this is a good idea guys . I can't be suffering out there to provide for a woman that won't later appreciate your suffering and still cheat on you for flimsy excuse and us her own salary for Brazilian air and cream.

Bro , I am sorry for your experience.

My advice would be that you let it flow instead of sharing bills . Because there is not better way to communicate it with an African woman that won't get them turned off.

Let's get to the root of your decision..... Your ex wife didn't cheat because you pay all the bills or you didn't give her attention while you work to pay all the bills . Your ex wife cheated because women have the tendency to cheat in any situation. Even if you had giving all the attention and pay bills . Even if you hadn't given the attention and didn't pay bills , she would have cheated .

So bro , the reason why you wanted to share bill with your present wife wasn't because the previous wife cheated. Your major reason for considering sharing bills with the present one is because of inflation. You are scared to shoulder it alone and in the end she may pay you with infidelity , right ?

Please remove cheating from the context of the reason to share bills with your wife because even if you share bill , she may still likely cheat, same with if you handle bills alone .

What you desire is to make your wife contribute to the responsibilities of the home because the situation of the inflation in the country isn't friendly.

Number 1 thing to consider is how Africa women , especially Nigeria work. Telling her directly to share bills with you is like setting fire in your house . Because she is not indoctrinated that way , she will indirectly or directly rebel that idea , and your home will crumble.

In her mind " how dare you ask me to share bills with you when other men wants or wanted as their wife and would never suggest such mischievous idea " . She will be angered, a heating tendency will be ignited, she will cease to be loyal to you . She can even suggest you also take part in house chores which is attributed to women responsibilities in the home.

Look at it from this angle bro. In Africa, especially in Nigeria, a man should take care of all the financial aspect of the home while women take care of house chores which includes cleaning, bathing children and cooking etc. As a man I believe you wouldn't want to be assigned to any house chores but you can assist without being told , the same way women don't like to partake in finance responsibilities of the house but can also assist .

Now , how would you feel if your wife suggests you share house chores with her , the same way you would feel if you suggest sharing financial responsibilities .

And another thing that is triggering your idea of sharing financial responsibilities with her is because she is earning reasonable amount of money, as such , she should contribute. But Africa home doesn't work where the woman is assigned to contribute financially even if she is making more money than you . If she must contribute, make it flow without telling her .

For example:
Instead of telling her that she should be taking a particular financial responsibility like house rent or school fees . Ask her for money with the excuse that you don't have enough, she should borrow you , and promise to pay back , even if you don't pay back . It is better that way than giving her that sense of assigned responsibility.

Another thing to know:
Patriarch is successfully runned in an Africa home when the man shoulders almost all the financial responsibilities. Your leadership will be free of threats , more respect from your wife and infidelity will be reduced to some extent.


The point is , if you want a successful home with your wife, never in this life tell her to share bills with you . You can tell her to borrow you money which you will pay later , even if you don't pay back , she won't be that angry. Or be using other indirect ways but never be direct . Make it flow.