omoge:

@ nwando

yes you are right bo. 90% of the guys on Nairaland are good at it. say something that's contrary to their own view and grandmama for village go suffer even the ones that are long dead.

Not only nigerians, but most Nigerians are good at it.

did i hear someone saying Nigerians in Nigeria have calmer tones? which states/city make i go visit?

uspry1, i won't touch craiglist not in my sleep

omoge  are you telling me?
These Nigerians in Nigeria just talk anyhow,especially the men.
Before you know it they'll start calling girls ashewo and describing private parts.
are they drinking these bad behaviour from pure water?

hipernetix:

@liftedone

Please don't take it personal, the question was not meant to be provocative, I was honestly asking, does that make all Nigerians abusive and insultive even if they are not faced with all those hardships you mentioned?

And its hipernetix not hypernix! 

Are you a Nigerian? If so, you live in England, so maybe you have the answer to that question as I can only speak about the scenarios I am confronted with. And my views are not sacrosanct.

naija_diva:

but nigerians in america are so loud and rude and they let you know that they are struggling.

Gosh, this is so funny, Nairaland never ceases to make me laugh  

debosky:

@ topic,

a reason why these threads sometimes go off into abusive insults and the like is often due to derailment from the original topic of discourse. For example, we are trying to discuss a general abusive and insulting (no such word as 'insultive') tendencies of Nigerians on this forum.

now a post by naija_diva (as she has the right to of course) states the problem from her own viewpoint, giving a 'males are worse than females' colouration to the initial topic. Now someone who is very emotional and not in agreement with the 'men are worse than the women' theory may jump on this, and before you know it, the insults start to fly left, right and center. This leads to a complete digression from the original line, a return to which would require an effort of gargantuan proportions.

Simply put, once you appeal to the emotional side of people (and Nigerians are highly emotional) this makes a section of the rational center of the brain shut down, and you begin to see only anger, hatred and other qualities being displayed.

In addition, instigators such as know how to seed this emotional response and actually enjoy watching the fights. It all comes down to the individual - will you allow an emotionally hurt and rampaging person lead you down that path or will you continue to reason in as rational and objective a manner as possible?

the choice is yours

chei debo,are you using idea to accuse me ?

_{my conscience dey worry me so}

liftedone:

Are you a Nigerian? If so, you live in England, so maybe you have the answer to that question as I can only speak about the scenarios I am confronted with. And my views are not[b] sacrosanct.[/b]

Nsukka!!!!!!
biko wetin be sacrament

@omoge

LOL, I agreed with you not to touch craiglist. Craiglist is THE WORST hate insult postings i ever seen in my whole life, far far far worse than Nairaland forum. I quit Craiglist to switch Nairaland. NL more informative and educational.

Because i received lot of hate responses on my email on Craiglist on my topic about deaf vs hearing on dating. 200 negative responses in 2 weeks non-stop, can you imagine that? (only 5 nice ones)

As of result, I found out that those i replied had bad experiences dealing with deaf mates as well as fake 419 scammers who pretend to be deaf person before, think i was one of them. I already did ask them why they blew me off like that, is because of my English grammar. Well I am not perfect writing in English!!!!

However almost all of them already apologized to me not know that I am real deaf!!!

not to get into a slug-fest, but what about the Nigerians in Nigeria calling every one outside a 'shit packer'?

that doesn't sound nice and calm to me. after driving your car in Lagos with shouts of 'mr i go drive myself, your mates don get driver' 'na your papa get road' and listening to endless shouts on the radio of 'oh oh yahoo oh oh, yahoozeee' and the likes, how on earth can you be calm??

unless you live in a hamlet far removed from Nigerian urban madness

nwando nwa mama i no fit accuse you o, you be my paddy for jungle

uspry1:

@omoge

LOL, I agreed with you not to touch craiglist. Craiglist is THE WORST hate insult postings i ever seen in my whole life, far far far worse than Nairaland forum. I quit Craiglist to switch Nairaland. Nairaland more informative and educational.

Because i received lot of hate responses on my email on Craiglist on my topic about deaf vs hearing on dating. 200 negative responses in 2 weeks non-stop, can you imagine that? (only 5 nice ones)

As of result, I found out that those i replied had bad experiences dealing with deaf mates as well as fake 419 scammers who pretend to be deaf person before, think i was one of them. I already did ask them why they blew me off like that, is because of my English grammar. Well I am not perfect writing in English!!!!

However almost all of them already apologized to me not know that I am real deaf!!!

what's craiglist and are you really deaf (if u don't mind me asking)?

Thanks to everyone who has responded and given various reasons. There will always be reasons so are we going to cave into aggression because we have a reason to do so. I know Nigeria can be a tasking place to live in but it is still not the a war torn region and hasn't experienced (thank God) war or famine consistently like some other countries.

I agree there are mean people everywhere but I do not think Nigerians fall into that category its just our tendency to be flippant and express ourselves with harsh words. The people in question may actually be nice people who have just learnt to behave this way. What can we do to change this at least on Nairaland

debosky:

@ topic,

a reason why these threads sometimes go off into abusive insults and the like is often due to derailment from the original topic of discourse. For example, we are trying to discuss a general abusive and insulting (no such word as[b] 'insultive'[/b]) tendencies of Nigerians on this forum.

Thanks correction noted.

pmdaboh:

@ Poster
I enjoyed your comment, for I have noticed this on nairaland for some time. I write articles on nigeriansinamerica.com and nigerianmuse.com, and I have noticed the same pattern as well. To me, it is not a Nigerian trait, for that same trait is found in Americans and other people from various parts of the world who have different opinions about sensitive subjects. They also resort to profanity, shouting, rudeness, etc.

I believe if a person is not mature to accept that people (in your own familys, among friends, and co-workers) can and do actually feel differently about the same topic (sex, religion, marriage, divorce, etc.), they will resort to this type behaviour.

Its a relief to know this is not a unique observation at least there is hope for us. Is it possible that people find it easy to abuse people they don't see and would be a bit more reserved if it was a face to face discussion?

uspry1:

@ poster and debosky

I disagreed with this posting, it sound like ONLY NIGERIANS are abusive and insulting.

All races in every genders and every countries/nationality do have abusive and insult due to traits or lack of manners or lack of education!

This posting started by asking a question based on specific behaviours found on Nairaland which correct me if I am wrong has a large Nigerian membership. I can go through some specific threads and point out abuses that where uncalled for this has happened over and and over again and I would like to know why. It is not good enough for me that it happens elsewhere so its okay. If I was on another forum with the same kind of pattern I would be asking the same questions.

On average,english and americans are more abusive than african.Africans are more timid or rather cultured to be indiscriminately abusive,to an average white person,it is just like saying good morning.Nwando,review your comments on the world wide ban on the bible thread.

true but they ignore the insults unlike nigerians when they hear someone speak bad of them or give them bad eye, they want to challenge the person.

Etin:

Its a relief to know this is not a unique observation at least there is hope for us. Is it possible that people find it easy to abuse people they don't see and would be a bit more reserved if it was a face to face discussion?

Yes, it is. Some people are only brave behind their computers.

I think d issue of abuse and insult need to be addressed on this forum
If there is a penalty for reacting aggresively or rudely to an issue on this forum
peolpe would learn to be more polite and cautious in there pattern of interaction

^{Na grammartical blunder some dey come find for here,} _{and na dat one dey cause fight pass}

BlkRaven:

Yes, it is. Some people are only brave behind their computers.

no lie.

don't want to start anything but you see how we are having an intelligent conversation with no insult added and the main people who usually start such nonsense are not here?

Why Nigerians are so insulting and abusive? Hmn. I believe its because the struggle for survival has made most people unnecessarily aggressive and intolerant. What you see on Nairaland is only a reflection of Nigerians in the physical world.

walexy:

If there is a penalty for reacting aggresively or rudely to an issue on this forum
peolpe would learn to be more polite and cautious in there pattern of interaction

^{Na grammartical blunder some dey come find for here,} _{and na that one dey cause fight pass}

I assume you are referring to me

But I'm not offended, I meant no harm and was simply pointing out an error, and the original poster graciously accepted and made amends.

Thanks Etin for doing that

In response to that, some others would've started saying 'this is kolo mentality' or 'na my papa language' and so on, while my intention was to bring clarity and focus to the issue being discussed. I guess your pre-determined mindset to receiving criticism plays a role in your response.

PS: there is a penalty for 'aggressive reaction' and other sins, its called 'BANNING" and Seun exercises this supreme power from time to time. Ask the fighters and warriors, they'll show you their scars from receiving Seun's treatment

Thanks again to everyone. I would like your opinon on this:

Re: What Does Your Name Mean?
« #119 on: October 10, 2007, 12:30 AM »

Quote from: MoOdYLaDy on October 10, 2007, 12:28 AM
I won't tell you my name but it means Money Wealth, so go figure, its' a very rare Yoruba name Tongue

who GIVES A fuckINg damn what your name is>?, please keep that crap to yourself,aint nobody gon go extra miles trying to figure what "DEMONIC NAME"MEANS

Please can someone tell me how the above statement resulted in the following one. Honestly I was not looking for this I was enjoying a thread about the meaning of names. I was half expecting someone who understands yoruba to guess her name and the next thing i saw was this!

Abeg forget that thing. Using a forum thread to generalise that we're abusive is wrong. Using abusive language is common on most forum sites, its an opportunity to use this abusive language when you know you can't when talking with someone in person.  Well I guess its rampant here because not much moderation is given to posts. I'm telling you, if like the 606 site of the BBC isn't properly moderated you'll see a lot of foul language there. Same goes for some other forum sites. So using foul language on a forum site is normal if the posts are left to be. I'm not criticising Seun's work I believe he is doing a great job ( no ban me o ).

Even for those who use it a lot here, you find out they hardly do so outside this forum site so really there is nothing it. I don't think you should take it seriously when an abusive language is thrown at you here. But I agree yeah it shouldn't be so much at least we should argue without abusing.

Conclusion: Using abusive language no be only Naija thing.

Its because we are born into a struggle. We are natural born struggler that need to fend for themselves and in order to fend for ourselves, we have to be aggressive.

Thats where all the insults and things come from. Its just in our blood to be insultive.

because some of them think they are better than everyone else, they think they know it all

muchbabe:

because some of them think they are better than everyone else, they think they know it all

Thanks that's one aspect of it. Kill a suggestion before it even takes root.

Alec:

Abeg forget that thing. Using a forum thread to generalise that we're abusive is wrong. Using abusive language is common on most forum sites, its an opportunity to use this abusive language when you know you can't when talking with someone in person. Well I guess its rampant here because not much moderation is given to posts. I'm telling you, if like the 606 site of the BBC isn't properly moderated you'll see a lot of foul language there. Same goes for some other forum sites. So using foul language on a forum site is normal if the posts are left to be. I'm not criticising Seun's work I believe he is doing a great job ( no ban me o ).

Even for those who use it a lot here, you find out they hardly do so outside this forum site so really there is nothing it. I don't think you should take it seriously when an abusive language is thrown at you here. But I agree yeah it shouldn't be so much at least we should argue without abusing.

Conclusion: Using abusive language no be only Naija thing.

You have just echoed my point people should moderate their responses. We have self control and can exercise it. We are not machines remotely controlled. How many of us would be flippant in a job interview say in a Bank for a dream job after 6 years of unemployment, hunger and frustration? my guess is that we would be polite because its important to us. Bottom line it has not become important to us to be polite that's why some of us are very quick to abuse and insult others.

@ najia diva

First question: what is Craigslist?

Craig's list is THE WORLD largest online community site, 2nd or 3rd top world forum site, just like Nairaland forum.
link: www.craigslist.org

To look for hate-insult postings on craigslist, pick which countries you want to seek then find category "Personals" to click "rants and raves".

Second question: am I really deaf?

Yes, I am really deaf with excellent college-degreed education, entrprenuership (computer and internet specialist guru---soon will shut down my business this year), and friendly personality who thrist learning about Nigeria culture for my business proposal submission to help out 9ja homeownership in the quality of electricity power and housing solution. I am black American-born. Few of my 9ja friends said that i am too much feel like i am Nigeria woman to them after getting know me better---shocking that i type few 9ja language.

I have been doing my homework learning about Nigeria for one year and 3 months so far.

It is quite disturbing how many of us easily resort to throwing abuses and insults at others on seemingly harmless issues. We become so combative and one wonders atimes why we dont feel any restriction in displaying this bad trait. I think another factor responsible for this, apart from bad upbringing and bad educational background earlier mentioned, is the desire of many of us wanting to dominate others.

naija_diva (f)
md/dc
Posts: 1637

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Re: Why Are Nigerian So Abusive And Insultive?
« #17 on: Today at 07:39:11 PM »

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Quote from: Kobojunkie on Today at 06:42:53 PM
Please stop with the MALE vS FEMALE, BLACK vs WHITE rhetoric,


thanks for making my point. and the attacking begins.

I am quite sure that telling you not to make this interesting debate a male vs female bashing ring or a black vs white move is not insulting in any way. It is simply an adult telling another adult to stop trying to turn what seems intelligent into what it is not. If you consider that bashing, I wonder what you will actually consider non bashing??

Etin:

Thanks again to everyone. I would like your opinon on this:



Please can someone tell me how the above statement resulted in the following one. Honestly I was not looking for this I was enjoying a thread about the meaning of names. I was half expecting someone who understands yoruba to guess her name and the next thing i saw was this!

@ Etin

the second comment following that name description post is from a well known lunatic on nairaland . That gender confused boy/girl seems to be suffering from an extreme case of bi-polar disorder, he is constantly riling people for no reason, and the next second will start apologising profusely

his name is ayefele/star01/shakira and a couple of other monikers, he's a jester that should not be taken seriously

i think some of them are worst off in real life. if they can insult you while hiding behind the computer, pray you don't meet them in real life o.

Etin:

Thanks again to everyone. I would like your opinon on this:

who GIVES A fuckINg damn what your name is>?, please keep that crap to yourself,aint nobody gon go extra miles trying to figure what "DEMONIC NAME"MEANS



Please can someone tell me how the above statement resulted in the following one. Honestly I was not looking for this I was enjoying a thread about the meaning of names. I was half expecting someone who understands yoruba to guess her name and the next thing i saw was this!

This thread is spot on. Sometimes I really wonder wat this is all adout. U cant just hold a decent debate on an issue without it turning to some mudslinging event. The fact that the person on one end of the terminal does not know jack about the other person on the other side hardly stops them from trading insults.

Simple discussion, little difference in opinion, gbam!!!! One person is already using cuss words like it is going out of fashion.

Nna, na so we see am ooo, na so we go take am

the abuse has started as i expected . . .

for example

wetin dis Watford supporter dey yarn sef? abeg carry your gbongbosiga head from hia, we dont associate with loser club fans!

ps insult is directed at uche