^^"Thunder fire your papa"? She might probably get a good beating for that since he is a woman beater anyway.

kandiikane: ^^"Thunder fire your papa"? She might probably get a good beating for that since he is a woman beater anyway.

HE would not. If he tried it, then he just denied himself the opportunity of having her back for life and if he has truly change has he said, then he should not tried it.

suggary: I was dating a man who insulted me and rubbished my self esteem.while I was dating him I did everytin to make tins work.I washed,cleaned and served him cos I wanted to make tins work.I knew he had a girlfriend who he refused to dropped yet I managed along.any time I complained we would fight and I was the one been beaten up becos he is stronger than me.I remember my last birthday he didn't even give me any tin cos I refused to sleep in his house.the next day I discovered he gave the bottle of wine out out to his neighour which I bought with my own money.this guy really dealt with me dat it got to a point dat I was a shadow of myself cos the whole tin affected me emotionally.one day he sized my handbag and money and I had to trek home ten in the night just becos I insulted him and the girl he was dating.I bore all this becos of one of my auntys.she was always telling me to be patient and bear anytin I saw cos most women go thru the same.this went on from july to december and God I saw hell.I finally quite the relationship on the 31st of december when he refused to open the door cos I came two hours later than expected.dat day I decided to let go and enjoy my Godgiven life darming what ever my aunty would say.now the monkey has been runing around begging dat he wants to get married to me and he knows he wasn't fair to me and he has decided to change his way dat he was only testing me if I loved him.(He is a divorce and his former wife cleared everytin when she was leaving).he has been crying to my parents and they all seem to like him cos I never told my mum what he did to me when I was dating him(she would disown me and my aunty if she hears half of what I went thru).now he wants to get married and he wants me back.should I give him the benefit of doubt.deep down I don't know if he has changed or he is coming back cos he feels he has a dummy he can always ride on

U should'nt even ask that question, UR SELF WORTH IS SOOOO MUCH MORE, never ever let anyone tell u to settle for less...Plz don't let anynone beat the beauty out of u....

One word: RUN!!

My dear girl,i don't know if my advice is coming late,i just hope it isn't.
Let me tell you a little bit about myself. I come from a family where marriage is highly regarded such that if a young girl is approaching the age of 25,everyone would start teasing her about getting married. So i grew up with that mentality as regards to marriage being the 'in' thing in a woman's life. Having said that.
When i was growing up as a teenager,i had issues of low-self esteem and when i got into the university,i was fortunate to have mingled with people who made me value myself-worth. So when i decided to date men,i never let anyone treat me anyhow until i met a man who almost rubbished my hard years of grooming myself as an independent young woman who valued herself. Just like you,i cleaned his house,washed his clothes both the hard ones, cooked his meals even sacrificed my virginity to this man (after having dated more prospetive guys way back in the university). But what did he do,he treated me like a shit three months after knowing him, always disapproving of what i wear(i like dressing decently), asking me to get him a huge loan from my sister which i almost did,told me that i should get pregnant before we get married which i found so difficult to understand,controlling my life like a remote control,even told me to my face that he was God-sent to me!
The scales finally fell off my eyes when i started seeing signs of physical abuse, i summoned courage and took a walk for good. There and then i told myself that i will always value my self-worth no matter what and will never let anyone walk all over me. This guy still came back begged,cried,even told people to beg on his behalf that he was a changed person, but i still maintained my stance. Today iam happier and 'happiest' that i made that decision.
So my dear,listen to voices of reason here. Count your teeth with your tongue while you still have one!

I want to thank everyone one this forum who adviced me not to go back to my ex.I must say u guys encouraged me and made me oen my eyes to the emotional amd physical abuse.he really really begged but I stood my ground so he gave u.thanks guys for helping me keep my head up.love u all

How are you finding the seperation?

You are welcome suggary

poster, i tnk u shd give him anor chance.
Dts if u want to suffer for the rest of ur life of course.

Contrary to what everyone said.

I would advise you go back so he can complete what he started

Have you read Titi Arowolos story BTW

@poster, Honestly while you were describing this horrible human being, I actually said to myself, who is this unlucky girl that fell for my ex, until you said he was formerly married. see girl, My ex fit perfectly your description, but guess what I did to him,I arranged for further studies abroad,got hooked to my husband, we wedded and i greeted him with the pix on FB. ABEG MOVE ON JOOR, NO LET ME CATCH YOU SAY YOU DE GO BACK TO DAT SWINE! dnt you tink you deserve better? i mean a man who will cherish, love and appreciate you 4 the rest of your life, accepting you for who you are? abeg am out of here, i dey vex when ladies de fall person hand. eeee na fight!

I don't trust this man. . . .I would NOT!!!
Something tells me he was not raised right. . . and having proved his abusive nature. . . .
I don't wanno commit murder. . . I COULD KILL HIM AFTER GETTING MARRIED TO HIM.
I am concerned about your inability to set limits!

IT IS BETTER TO HAVE REMAINED SINGLE. . . THAN TO HAVE FAILED IN A MARRIAGE!

There's no doubt you feel good spiting it all out here but,not sure you really will take any good advice from anyone. I also doubt you'll be able to smell your own breath even though its right under your nose, I'm sorry. Some women just like it bent and I wish you well

Mu Che Che Che Che Che

More spitting to come.

Ever wondered why the former wife left? You need to learn to love yourself gurl. From your story,I seriously doubt you do.