hey i really like this guy he has just turned 20 and im nearly 16 ,,, do u think its a big age gap and should i stay away, people tell me all different things and have mixed feeling about it, i really like him and definately know him very well. although at this moment in time he has a girlfriend and i feel like im having an affair coz he tells me he relli likes me but cant decide who he wants me or her, could anyone help please and give me some advice thanks x

If he doesn't know who he wants to be with whether you or his current g/f. If he finally decides to be with you, the same problem will occur unless there is a miracle intervention

thanks for the reply,,, yeh i understand but i just need help and i dont no wot to do,,, people give me really weird looks wen i tell them hes 20 and im 16 so i dont no wot to do, does any1 think that is bad please be honest? and do i need to move on beens hes got a gf or carry on likin him? x

just 4 years, well there is noting wrong with that i know someone who went out with a 30 year old and she was 16. so what do u think about that.

Don't be naive.The guy's just playin'u.This' a common trend with guys n'young girls with the mind of hittin it.If he really wants to show he loves u there'd be no dilemma-he'd drop the other girl 4u.If he does this however,be rest assured he'd soon dump u 4some hotter chick.That's how d game plays out n'I've been around long enough 2know.

Just a thot:"Whatever happened to facing your studies squarely for the time being?"

@MELLA,i think u are too young to start thinking of guys,but if u really know wat you want,no problem.the choice is yours.

oh my. . really funny how times have changed.

Abi o! At her age I wz still pre-occupied with clearing all the prizes @ the end-of-year prize-giving day.

The guy I love is 13 Years elderrrrr to me I still don't care!

Hey Mella, am not of a big bro, but i guess i have a little line here for you.

For a start you appear to have 2 misgivings - (i) Your age difference and (ii) his preference.

Simple truth is that a relationship is worthless if you don't feel comfortable in it. I mean why do you want to be in a relationship?, Is it because others have guys and you need to show off? If that is the case then its more of having an item with you for others to see.

But where you are truly ready to have a guy, I swear you wont be asking if 4 years difference is anything. Your love for him would be age-blind.

I think his preference is even more of an issue that you ought to tackle, otherwise, baby girl you will have a sad story to tell.

Having said all these I think I should tell you what I would have told my kid sister if she was to come up with a question like this. I would tell her that at that age you should be more focused in making your grades. There is nothing wrong though in having a guy, but it should NOT be a priority - you will have guys, and lots of them (if you so desire), but for now, get married to your text books

mella:

thanks for the reply,,, yeh i understand but i just need help and i don't no wot to do,,, people give me really weird looks when i tell them hes 20 and im 16 so i don't no wot to do, does anyone think that is bad please be honest? and do i need to move on beens hes got a girlfriend or carry on likin him? x

@mella
It sounds suspicous that your people might know more than you know about your guy who is 20 and has girlfriend. I think you ought to dig more deeper to find out what your guy's hidden agenda are before you fall over your head.

If i was in your shoe as 16 yr old, forget it about boy-chasing, focus on schooling to reach my goals and accomplishments PRIORITY!!!

[quote from uspry][/I think you ought to dig more deeper to find out what your guy's hidden agenda are before you fall over your head.]

If she starts digging at the age of 16 she would eventually dig her grave,

As 16 one should not get too involved with a relationship. As far as I am concerned 4 years difference is not much but it would be best she hangs her interest elsewhere

@ the topic

Firstly at your age you are suppose to face your studies not looking for boyfriends, there are still lots of time for guys.