I quite agree with most of these nicknames.
Just to add a few
Essien - M.Bison,Tireless worker.This Essien doesn't exist anymore.
Bale - Baàlè
Kalou - Barman.This guy has more goal post hits than goals.

Peter cech= peter catch
Van der sar= van der save
Wright philips= Keke napep
Fabregas= Fabrepass
Ronaldinho= Juju
Ferdinand= Drug man\igbo
Messi = Merciless
Ivanovic = onye ike(one with big nyash)
Tevez = The beast \Agunkwo( lion)
Evra = Evra bus stop\last bus stop
Henry = Igwe
Adebayor = Ademumu
Bale =Iru monkey(monkey face)
Berbertov = Adanma(Fine girl)
Malouda = Malou(cow in hausa)
Drogba = Doh gba (Draw and shoot)

Messi- Eruka
Ronaldo-Ororo
Gerard- steven G
lampard-lampholder
Esien-eshin Buruku
Torres- Baby Gal
Baloteli- razz
Tevex- Apruca meanin Gragra

What about Dirk Kuyt Nick name .....

Chicharito = food is ready. Pique = oko shakira(shakira's husband)

Wayne Rooney - Wayne Swirin
F. Torres - Ore (Yoruba for "gift")
Arsene Wenger - baba pull-over (almst always in raincoats)
Van Nistelrooy - de be de be (he's always there)
Shevchenko - Chevy l'omo
Bale -
Walcott - okada
Drogba - duro gbe (wait carry am)
Aiyegbeni - yakkity yak
G. Agbonlahor - Gbolahan
Eto'o - eshin
Ronaldinho - Ike teeth
Zidane - headboy
Cr7 - igbe raga (Yoruba for pride)

Wes brown = odi (deaf & dumb) Hleb = rubber band

Giggs = baba agba (old man)

Hilarious thread.

Here goes...

I coined the first one myself as a metaphor for his lethal and totally jaw-dropping acrobatic skills.

Berbatov ~ SCIMITAR Berbatov.

Ronaldo ~ CR7 or Ronnie

Messi ~ Ojuju

Vidic ~ Agent 47 ( my fabrication again here. Cold-blooded SOB)

Anelka ~ Madam Anelka

Obertan ~ Malaria

Scholes ~ Uncle Scholes

Balotelli ~ Why Always Me

Nistelrooy ~ Rude Boy

Schweinsteiger ~ With a badass name like that, who needs a moniker?

dagreen14: What about Dirk Kuyt Nick name .....

Kuti

Giggs= Akowe(Secretary)

Lots of Arsenal players with nicknames
Kolscieny- Kosileyin.
Walcott- Asewo.
Vermalen- Gamalin.
Coquelin- Chloroquine
Sagna- Ebora
Others that i know
Assou-Ekotto - Aso ati sokoto
Pape Bouba Diop- Baba Lati (Roflmao)
Robben- Apari
Tevez - Animal farm
etc

de gea - doughnut
ferdinand-fagbo
vidic-akpata rock or bus stop
pepe-FILÉ!!!
giggs-baba wale
scholes-tape rule
berbawaste aka control
chamark-ori la ra i.e na head we buy
anderson-oversize boot
torres-50cent
carrol-figurehead

Drogba- Dr Ogba(doctor ogba)

femi4: Branislav Ivanovic : Odi(Deaf man cos the guy hardly speak)

djibril cisse: Babalawo (because of his tatoo)

Fabregas: Fabre-pass (accuracy in passing the ball)

Balotelli: Why always me/Problem child (You all know the reason)

Anelka: Alhaji (Because of his beards)

koscielny: Ko se yin (i.e we no get defense/back)

Henry: Igwe (you know the reason now)

Toress: 50kobo (you know now)

Vermaelen: Verminator (terminates any move from the opposing team)

Zidane: Professor

Messi: little destroyer

Ashley cole: Cashely cole (enough cash spent to move him from Arsenal to Chelsea)

C.Ronaldo: cr7

Gattusso: General

Van dar sar: Van dar save

Almunia: mumunia

Sendros: Iyawo drogba (Drogba's wife)

sol campbell: Cowbell! Our milk

Van per sie: VP/ Van rapist

oxy Chamberlain: Oxygen

Suarez: Rabbit teeth

edited

*C. Ronaldo = C. Wahala (always terrorising defences)
*Andy Carrol = Aunty Caro
*Almunia = Aluminium
*Jens Lehmann = Film man (when his mistakes were at its peak)
*Paul Scoles = Paul Nwoke Ocha (ibo for Paul the white man. . .its actually a musician's name from the east)
*Didier Drogba = Double D
*Kolo Toure = Kolomental
*Kalou = 'i no go score' (always missing chances)

Drogba - duro gba (yoruba - wait and collect)

;Lol....ds is so hilarious,kip dem comin peeps!

Emmanuel eboue - olori eru (leader of slaves) from his time at arsenal.

Essien - 3310, shoemaker, hire killer,
Drogba - Derogba
Messi - ebora, iwin (witch, wizard)
Ivanovic - yodi (buttocks)
C Ronaldo - ijaya
Anelka - Alhaji
Henry - Igwe
Arsene Wenger - Baba Ijebu
Abramovic - Baba Olowo
Victor valdes - Alakowe (always clean his shirt on d pitch)
Kanu - Papilo
Emily heskey - Broda Kayode (he looks like ppl wit such name)
Gerrard - general
Fardinand - fagbo
Torres - 50 (pronounced like fifty cent)
Ozil - oju asha (eagles eye)
Zidane - football (hes so special we av 2 name hìm afta d game)
Ronaldo & ronaldinho- eyin (teeth)
Tevez - ishan (muscle), monster
Yaya toure - donkey

Drogba: Didier, Aderogba
Essien: Essien Igbokwe
Fabregas:Fabre pass
Anelka: Nneka
Alves: Dangbana
Seedorf:Saidi
Casillas:Ikechukwu
Van Der sar :Van Der save
Messi:Merciless
C Ronaldo:Ororo
Rooney:Rude boy
Ramires:Aboki
Nasri: Nasiru
Zidane:Prof.
Almunia:Broda Alumi
Ferdinand:Jegbo
Gerrard:General
Lampard:Lampo
Djibril Cisse:
Kolo Toure:Kolo
Anderson:Tpain
Babalawo
Torres:Floppy disk
Abidal:Last bus stop
Puyol:Puyol bus stop
Busquet:Actor
Mercello:Gingerman
Edu Chinedum
Gattusso:Terry g
Diarra:Oriyomi/Dirty-job
Clichy:Kilishy/Kelechi
Mourinho:Mourin know
Ibrahimovic:Buraimo
Ronaldinho:Enyin
Becham:Olubeki
Shevchenko:Sheffiu
Giggs:Giggison
Van persie:Van pepper
Sholes:MTN
Cech:Okada man
Ballotelli:He goat
Nistelrooy: Ready-made......
Chelsea:Sepe
Man U:PDP
Barca:Predators
Abrahamovic:2much money
Arshavin:Assassina

Lampard: Hunch back