XX01:
Thanks all for the support. It's been very traumatizing for me because I had no clue. I don't know why I felt so comfortable with her. I have been asking myself hard questions. A mum should usually have intuition about stuff like this but nothing. I keep remembering all the times I dismissed my husband's fears as nit-picking because he didn't want a live in nanny.

My first son that is usually quite vocal is now more withdrawn. How did I not see the signs? I have now restructured my business such that I don't have to be making that long journey. Taking a baby in traffic for almost 3 hrs is not a good idea.

God will continue to help our LOs.

enque:


ooohk!

i use a food flask for her meals .i.e the food that i have to cook and puree from home.

for cereals, I pre-mix wth milk and they just add water and feed when she is ready t eat

babythug:


@ XX01 this sums it up aptly! Don't beat yourself up about it! Thanks God the little one is fine. Encourage your first son to speak out more no matter what! God help us parenting is much tougher these days!

I have had enough of helps for now! I also between jobs so it's tough on us all if you get me! No one can understand why I'm not looking for a replacement! Half the time everyone* is complaining* about the state of the house but as long as I'm not adding shouting at Bose or Caro or worrying about whether they're feeding my son properly to my issues lemme manage myself for now!

AlphaHandMaiden:




I feel you mama!.
Sometimes the peace and quiet of not having to shout at anyone is priceless. Even if you are staring at a large pile of unwashed clothes and plates with the house looking like it got hit by a Tornado.

I do not understand why it is so hard to find good help! Especially now that most are paid. And the ones that misbehave are usually well treated.

My plan is to train my kids to clean up after themselves, and do the housework, because after more than 10 yrs of living on my own and doing everything myself i do not know how a live in help will work for me.

May be my thought process will change when i have more kids. But its always complaint upon complaint i hear from people who have helps. So is the help really helping.

For now, I rather live in an untidy house and be mentally ok and healthy. Than have a spotless home but develope high blood pressure and become a paranoid mess.

God help us.

AlphaHandMaiden:




I feel you mama!.
Sometimes the peace and quiet of not having to shout at anyone is priceless. Even if you are staring at a large pile of unwashed clothes and plates with the house looking like it got hit by a Tornado.

I do not understand why it is so hard to find good help! Especially now that most are paid. And the ones that misbehave are usually well treated.

My plan is to train my kids to clean up after themselves, and do the housework, because after more than 10 yrs of living on my own and doing everything myself i do not know how a live in help will work for me.

May be my thought process will change when i have more kids. But its always complaint upon complaint i hear from people who have helps. So is the help really helping.

For now, I rather live in an untidy house and be mentally ok and healthy. Than have a spotless home but develope high blood pressure and become a paranoid mess.

God help us.

Hmnnn, househelp wahala na real wah

For my own house cleaning, I got someone who only does the cleaning twice a month since its just me, hubby and baby. I use washing machine for some clothes and hubby dispatches the rest to the dry cleaner. This works for me presently. I think this option is better for families with lesser chores and one or two children

XX01:
Thanks all for the support. It's been very traumatizing for me because I had no clue. I don't know why I felt so comfortable with her. I have been asking myself hard questions. A mum should usually have intuition about stuff like this but nothing. I keep remembering all the times I dismissed my husband's fears as nit-picking because he didn't want a live in nanny.

My first son that is usually quite vocal is now more withdrawn. How did I not see the signs? I have now restructured my business such that I don't have to be making that long journey. Taking a baby in traffic for almost 3 hrs is not a good idea.

God will continue to help our LOs.

ftmum:
Morning mothers

My menstruation came just one month after delivery (cs)

Should I worry?

olubankemi:
She has been found! Details later. Just help me thank God.

hunniesuzie:
Thank God for "nosy" neighbours, Thank God your son is getting better and thank God you have the option of restructuring. This is the fear that makes me take my son to creche even though I have a live in nanny. May God continue to keep our Los

jazzyjazz pele oh, hope Ilan gets well soon

ijeoma2728:



It's not free, about 18k .its given twice.i'll try and verify. Are you a Benin momma

jazzyjazz:
XX01
Wow! Thank God your son is recovering. May God continually protect our babies for us o.
Please try to move past it. Some maids are like that. No matter what you do, they will still be mean to your kids.

jazzyjazz:

Amen o my sister.
We're still in the hospital and I'm told they might admit him. He still has a fever and temperature is still 38.8.
May God really keep our Los. It's not easy at all!

babythug:


I'm glad you at least can see my point of view! The Irony is that sometimes even with a standard help the house isn't up to scratch anyway!

It must be the general orientation around these parts that add to the nonsense these helps spew out! Many don't see it as a "job" but erroneously see it as doing you a favour! Especially because they also realize we working mums are mostly desperate as regards child care! I recall one thread here where a mama complained that her nanny was leaving her house to fraternize with neighbours and she didn't like it. Many commenters felt what's the big deal shouldn't she talk to others and socialize etc etc! After I commented that the nanny was at her place of work and not there for social reasons many of them backed off! So again you see the dilemma here, many just don't see it for what it is!!! Our casual way of fraternizing with them (which is more or less inevitable too) also adds to the general misbehaviors they exhibit.

I know if electricity where more constant in naija we would do away with helps! We go just cook and stock the freezer for a month, Use microwave when you get back from work or outings, you can iron on the go, vaccum and use washing machine daily etc etc

This too shall pass jare

Benignasweety:
Na to show them pepper sure pass now o. Atleast, they will fear you and do the right thing.

ftmum:
Morning mothers

My menstruation came just one month after delivery (cs)

Should I worry?

Giddyperson:

I noticed this, even if you say 'my nanny cut my baby in pieces and cooked her for dinner' you would see foolish people coming to say 'child labour' and 'were you treating her well'. So if you don't treat a grown women well, instead of her to quit or fight you sef, she's allowed to resort to maltreating a baby in return. And what's scary is that more than half the commenters reason this way, we might just have a 50% mentally unstable population in Nigeria. Meanwhile it's usually the best treated nannies that pull the most wicked crap.

ftmum:
Morning mothers

My menstruation came just one month after delivery (cs)

Should I worry?

Prettyhurts:


Lie lie, if you show them pepper, they'll do eye-service right thing and wait for the perfect time to do what dy want. I trust my help never reach to leave my pikin for am commot. The day I tried it, came back and she was giving my daughter cold satchel water(asin ice block cold). My dd wey get cough, person wey dy see me dy look for soln for her cough. My DD water was there oooo.

Prettyhurts:


Did they tell you what's wrong with him? Did they run some tests? Is it that bad that it requires been admitted? Is he pooing watery poop, loss of appetite, weak, vomiting? Can't injection and drugs help?

He's healed dear.

Benignasweety:
Chineke nna...
Then all helps are cursed with the spirit of wickedness.

Liftedhands:
Admission is best so baby can be properly monitored​ and parents have a bit of relief knowing third Ward is in expert hands.

Jazzyjazz he will be fine.

hunniesuzie:
If you're not doing exclusive then it can happen. However has your lochia stopped? If not it could be lochia and if it is, it means you've been stressing yourself and are not allowing yourself to heal. You need to take it easy oh, no strenous activities or excessive bending, CS is a major surgery