i wanted to start a cosmetics business, how much capital do need?

where did you get this Bullshit info about the change of the date? please dont mislead your brothers and Sisters.

TAYOOLU:

HI, ALL NAIRALANDER .

DIS IS TO INFORMED U ALL THAT THE TEST HAS BEEN POSTPONED.

PLS. READ FROM BELOW.

CHEERS,
ADEYEMI TAYO.

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Fitc FITC ANNOUNCMENT
FITC Announcement

The Financial Institutions Training Center (FITC) hereby announces that,all candidates short listed for the CBN Recruitment are advised of the postponement of the test previously scheduled for Saturday 24 January,2009.

A new date for the test will be communicated to all short listed candidates later.

Please cancel all plans you had made on account of all previous announcement or correspondence received from us.

The inconvienences caused by this postponement are highly regretted.

pal please help, am invited for the test too

I am Also interested in this Bussiness, I will be glad to be your dealer in North East and some part of North West.
feel free to contact me on amsisawa@yahoo.com am always online

I also wish to be part of thedistribution chain, I can be your distributor in Bauchi, Jigawa, Kano and possibly Gombe State.
Please contact me ASAP amsisawa@gmail.com

stop abusing our leaders

I will pay when it work

Oga seun can u give me some to spay?

Ameen

even without typing any word the result look same

whao, both are cheating each other

Somebody send this to may box long time ago

According to a proposed new law that would go into effect Jan 1, 2006 you will no longer be able to use a cell phone while driving unless you have a "hands free" adapter. I went to Circuit City and they wanted $50 for a headset with a microphone for my cell phone. Having a friend in the cell phone business, I talked with him and was able to come up with an alternative, working through Office Depot.

These kits are compatible with any! mobile phone and one size fits all. I paid him $0.08 each because he bought in quantity. Then we tried it with Motorola, Sprint, Verizon and Nokia units and they worked perfectly.

A photo is attached so scroll down & take a look and let me know if you want one. Also, forward this to anyone you know, who has a cell phone, and who may want one!

Don't Laught




Deer Sir,

I waunt to apply for the secritary job what I saw in the paper. I can
Type real quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting.

I think I am good on the phone and no I am a pepole person, Pepole
really seam to respond to me belly well.

I´m lookin for a Jobb as a secritary but it musent be to complicaited.

I no my spelling is not to good but find that I Offen can get a job thru
my persinalety. My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to
pay me and wat you think that I am werth,

I can start imeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser. .

hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.

Sinseerly,
Peggy May Starlings

Will you feed these visitors if they knock on your Door with empty Stomach

the first time I received the massage , i was thinking of replying him so that i can make him be in the fool of his blood

I receive almost the same massage

read

FROM:IBRAHIM ISSA
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPT.
BANK OF AFRICA (BOA)
OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO.
STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL.
Dear, friend,
I write to introduce this urgent/important business opportunity to you irrespective of the fact that we have not seen or known each other before believing that it will be of immense benefit to both of us.
Let me formally introduce myself. I am MR IBRAHIM ISSA, the assistance manager of the BANK OF AFRICA (BOA) OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO , I got your contact through network online in my earnest search,for a reliable individual who can assist me to make this transaction a reality with my believe in Allah that you will never let me down.
There is an outstanding sum of US$11.3million(Eleven million,three hundred thousand United States Dollars) that belong to one of our late foreign customer Mr. Andrea B. Smith who died with his
family in a plane crash that took place in Abdjan, Wast Africa a Miner in the Kruger Gold Company, a geologist by profession.
The banking laws and guidelines here stipulates that if Such fund remains unclaimed for five years, and no body apply to the bank as his or her next of kin to the deceased the fund will be transferred into the bank treasury as unclaimed fund.
Although personally, I kept this information secret within myself to enable the whole plans and idea be Profitable and successful during the time of execution. Meanwhile, all the whole arrangement to put claim over this fund as the bonafide next of kin to the deceased has been made, and all information will be provided to you as soon as you indicate your interest and willingness to assist me.
I am contacting you because of the need to involve a foreigner with account and foreign beneficiary, I need your full co-operation to make this work out fine because the management is ready to approve this payment to a foreigner who has the correct information of this account which I will provide to you. Should this interest you? kindly furnish me with your private phone and fax numbers for easy communication.
Meanwhile, I am prepared to make sure that the bank transfer this sum of US$11.3Million to your account with my position now in the office, I can transfer the money to any foreigner's reliable account which you can provide with assurance that this money will be intact pending my physical arrival in your country for sharing. I will destroy all documents of transaction immediately we receive this money leaving no trace to any place. And will also use my position and influence to effect legal approvals and onward transfer of the money to your account with appropriate clearance.
I have resolved to compensate you by briefing a brokerage commission of 40%net per-transfer expenses you may incur,5% set aside for general expenses, and 55% US$ will be for me and I guarantee you that all expenses during the transfer are subject to refund. Most importantly, I must emphasize that this business requires the utmost confidentiality and trustworthiness. We need to make an agreement that will bind us together and the same will protect individual interest in the near future.
In recognition to your personal executive power and investment opportunities that is bond in your country,do know that I have it in mind to establish a genuine business relationship with you in the nearest future, if you will be able to help me in order to expedite action, let me receive your approval or reply through the above addrress or Please accept my compliments, as I await your kind response through the above e-mail address.
THANKS. IBRAHIMISSA

make u put this one on National Dailys not on Naija Jokes lol

not funny but educative

this car need DMV - do not Move from Road safety corp

real sad story, if am among them we will have force him to came back to the office and pick the wahala

I can't hide this for myself let share the fun

Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were. The first man was an
Engineer, the second man was an Accountant, the third man was a
Chemist,,,,,,and the fourth man was a Government Employee. To show off,
the Engineer called his cat, "T-square, do your stuff." T-square
pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew
a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty
smart. But the Accountant said his cat could do better. He called his
cat and said, "Spreadsheet, do your stuff." Spreadsheet went out to the
kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal
piles of 3 cookies, Everyone agreed that was good. But the
Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and
said,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,"Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked
to
the fridge, took out a quart of milk,, got a 10 ounce glass from the
cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop into the
glass. Everyone agreed that was pretty good. Then the three men turned
to the Government Employee and said, "What can your cat do?" The
Government Employee called his cat and
said,,,,, "CoffeeBreak,,,,do your stuff." CoffeeBreak jumped to his
feet,,,,,,,,,,, , ate the cookies,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, , drank
the
milk,,,,,,,, shit on the paper , screwed the other three
cats,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, , claimed he injured his
back
while doing so,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, , filed a grievance report
for unsafe working conditions,,, , put in for Workers
Compensation, and , went home for the rest of the
day on sick leave,

funny, please dont say shari'a again

some one send this to meeeeeeeeee>
An Indian is having breakfast one morning; coffee, croissants, bread,
butter & jam when an American man, chewing gum , sits down next to him.
The Indian ignores the American who, nevertheless, starts a
conversation: American: "You Indian folks eat the whole bread??" Indian
(in a bad mood): "Of course." American: (after blowing a huge bubble)
"We don't. In USA, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in
a
Container recycles it, transform them into croissants and sell them to
India." The American has a smirk on his face. The Indian listens in
silence. The American persists: "Do you eat jam with the bread??"
Indian: "Of Course." American: (cracking his gum between his teeth and
chuckling), "We don't. In USA we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we
put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them,
transform them into jam and sell the jam to India." The Indian then
asks: "Do you have sex in USA?" American: "Why of course we do", the
American says with a big smirk. Indian: And what do you do with the
condoms once you've used them?" American: "We throw them away, of
course." Indian: "We don't. In India, we put them in a container,
recycle them, Melt them down into chewing gum and sell them to America.
________________________________________________________________________

may be we gona creat a poverty Monument for Obj to recognise Nigeria

Distinguished Passengers,

On behalf of Captain Ibrahim Mantle and the rest of his flight crew, I welcome u to the 2nd phace of our flight T-03 taking us direct to Ota. Our flight time is 45 minutes and we shall be cruising at 2007mph initial and 2019mph final and an altitude of above 50,000 feet above sea level.



Although we expect this flight to be exactly like any of our normal flights, aviation regulations demand that we acquaint you with safety precautions just in case. Please loosen your seatbelts and pay attention to the beautiful Fulani girls in front of you.



Should there be oxygen loss in the cabin, ghana-must-go leavelets will automatically drop from the panel above your head. Do not panic, pick one, put in your pocket and pretend nothing has happened, Breathe normally. Those who are traveling with children are advised to open channel 7 in our film deck and switch on our x-rated films for them to watch. They are meant for children. Please help the children to select from films among JAK GAWAN, EVIL GENIUS, GOGGLEMAN ABATCHA etc. They will enjoy it.



There are no emergency exits on this aircraft. You may break the window glass next to you if at any time you want to make an exit. Please jump out neatly but leave you baggage behind for save keeping. Collect them later at Phee-Dee-Phee Headquarters in Abuja anytime after 2007.



On arrival at Ota, the Royal 3rd-Term Orchestra will be available on tarmac to entertain. They will be lead by Mr Thugman Adedible [ Nigerian], Garrison Commander of Ibadan and they will play nice tunes like ‘Babalo ran mi wa’, ‘I deh Campe’, ‘I go die o’, ‘Mr Fix it’, ‘The godfada Kris’ etc etc



On behalf of Captain Ibrahim Mantle[American], Co Pilot Jerry Khan[Indian], Cabin Attendants Fani Power[ British], Greg Timber/Caliber [ Ghanaian], Hita Ghiwa [Bakassian], and flight Engineer Ojo Bicycle [Ibo], I wish you a nice flight on board T-03.



Please seat up, close your eyes and enjoy our filth. Captain Mantle still in Command.