INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Neo: Amazing Facts About Those Soothing Words That Healed My Childhood.

How Neo had remained unmarried still baffled me. But that wasn't what I went there to do. I believed we would talk about it another day. He started this way. “I do reflect on my quiet times about my early days. When I look at the journey that got me here, I thank God that I was able to walk through the rubbles of life to be here. I will always remember that turning point; the soothing words that healed the injured childhood that I had. Let me tell you my story”

He got on the phone and had a short discussion and then continued. “Our treasury bill matured today. That was the manager of our account on the phone. Anyway, back to my story. I lost my parents when I was four. Being an only child, I was lost in the world all alone. Those around me might have thought that I was too young to feel the loss but being the only child erased that immunity. I became sick immediately after the burial of my mother who died later than my dad; both deaths were spaced within six months. Being crowned an orphan that early was not even the hard part because I was too young to process what had happened. The part that almost got me drowned was finding someone who was ready to look after a poor four-year-old. Not that I was told this part, but it seemed as if a lot was cast before that responsibility could be forced on someone. I felt so because my foster parents treated me like a piece of article. They took away every dignity I had in me as a child. I was battered and intimidated in a manner that left me hopeless and empty. I got to the class drained and this affected my academic performance. That I wasn't doing well in school would be a gross understatement. I managed to graduate but I found myself in college where I appeared like a crestfallen lion standing before a hungry lion. In fact, I was intimidated by everything around me.”

Neo was on the phone again. This was like the tenth time in thirty minutes- yes, he was that busy. After putting down the phone, he said, “I didn't know why but somehow I knew my life was heading for the cliff. I needed a hanger to stay alive but there was none in sight. The glimmer of hope that I had was so insignificant that I became a teen with no iota of dreams. The only thing I had then was a heartbeat. It was this heartbeat that left me with the slightest belief that I could grow wings and fly one day; at least, to meet my parents. In my fourth year in school, something happened that changed my life and got me back in the race of life. Our English teacher invited me to the staffroom one Wednesday afternoon. She asked me to sit at the opposite end of the table and said to me, within earshot, “I feel the hurt in your eyes. I don't know what memories or experience that resulted in those but I have the feeling that you have a bright future ahead of you. Your poor performance in the class does not depict the man that I see. Throw away your sorrow and put in some effort. You might be shocked by the difference you would see.”

“It was like a blindfold was let off my eyes. It was a remarkable turning point in my life. I was lifted by those morale-boosting words. They were so soothing but muscular and mind-blowing. Gradually, all the self-belief that took the window out of my life began to burst the doors of my life. They all walked in with very bold statements. The first thing that I did was to move my sitting position from the back to the front of the class. I made consistent attempts at answering questions in the class and my confidence grew with every attempt. At the end of the term, I took the fifth position. It was outside the top four but that fact that I took the journey from 25th position to the fifth gave me the moral fist pumps that I needed. By the time the senior school certificate examination results were released about two years after, I made the best result in my class and was close to challenging the boy who posted the best result in the entire school. That was how mere words became the key that unlocked my dreams. I never looked back since that day.”

He looked at the wall clock adjacent to his sitting position and concluded this way. “I had my eyes set on the university but that dream met with a setback; there was no one interested in funding that dream. I didn't let that deter me from reaching the goal I had set for myself. Without wasting much time, I settled for an apprenticeship which I was scheduled to do for the next five years. It was a fantastic idea for someone in my situation. Even though it looked light-years away to some of my friends, I knew I would be done by the time those that made it to the university begin to graduate. Actually, some did not finish at the same time with me because they wasted a couple of years at home writing the entrance examination. While some were still in the university and some out of it, I graduated from my apprenticeship. They had their paper certificates but I stepped into the real world with more street knowledge, business contacts and money. It was huge leverage for me because I left the block with a quick start and never looked back. I have extended my business from selling motor spare parts to co-owning a microfinance bank. Sitting before you is the small four-year-old orphan that almost lost his dreams in the midst of nowhere”

REFLECTION
Words are very powerful. They are so powerful that God used it as a tool in creation. We have to learn how to use words wisely because they can either inspire or destroy. And when we talk about words, they can take two forms: what we say to others or what we say to ourselves. Whichever way, we should not forget the magical effect that words come with.

Words are very powerful. They are so powerful that God used it as a tool in creation. We have to learn how to use words wisely because they can either inspire or destroy. And when we talk about words, they can take two forms: what we say to others or what we say to ourselves. Whichever way, we should not forget the magical effect that words come with.
It took a couple of positive words to create that turning point in Neo’s life. He was very close to the precipice and might have taken a dive if those miraculous words from the teacher did not happen. In like manner, we should be careful with things we say to other people(our spouse, kids, friends, subordinate, etc) and what we say to ourselves. Spoken words could kickstart a life or push it further down the valley. Therefore, before you say that word, make sure it passes that test of relevance.
We may not have money to offer to people but with words alone, we can change their world by turning their miseries to blessing.

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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Elias: It Took Him Two Deaths To Worry Less

I couldn't make it to Okene when Elias' father was buried. It was more like a celebration of life from what I was told. It was during my visit to his place in the city after the burial that he told me this story. He started this way, “Every day that we live, we go through experiences that present us with the opportunity to learn and become better people. This is never in short supply. And it is because, moment after moment, we are exposed to practical life situations that leave a lot of lessons to be learnt. The downside is that people don't act as if they learnt anything from their experiences or those of others. My father was 90 years old when he died. He lived very much as a healthy man. At 90, he didn't need glasses to read the bible nor catheter to pass urine. He was a very strong man who had a lot of energy to expend on his routine activities. Over forty years ago when my dad was still in his late forties, my late mother was worried over his well being. She became paranoid at a point. She was worried that my father, who was her husband, was going to be poisoned or killed with charm by his friends or extend relations. She became a bit obsessive about the whole situation that it began to sow discord between the two. Her feelings were genuine and appeared credible at that point. Some closer friends and relations echoed similar concerns. The anxiety grew by the day as my father became wealthier. At a point, the whole family caught the fever and we all began to feel it was our collective duty to protect dad.”

He poured some wine into the glass cup provided to me. It was from a gallon of palm wine that I went along with to condole with him. He said, “The wine tastes good. It is the type my father would die for. I really miss him. Let me get back to my story. You see, you wouldn't blame my mother; all these happened in an era where food poisoning and assassinations were the order of the day. Everyone was scared and in my mother's case, it was a case of a woman trying to protect the man that she had spent the last twenty years of her life with. It came to the point that my parents would go through battles before my father was allowed to travel to the village. She wanted him to sever the relationship with certain friends who my mother felt were not in the category of trusted allies. My mother had a philosophy. She would always say to me, “when you wake up in the morning and see a cock running towards you, you better run for your dear life. It is possible that the cock had grown some teeth overnight.” My mother trusted very few people. I didn't meet my maternal grandparents so I could not say what would have informed those philosophies. The fear of losing my father became my mother’s worst nightmare. Anytime my father travelled to the village for meetings and functions, she hardly slept. And the house would be turned into a prayer camp until his return.”

Elias was on his fifth glass at this point. I had just one and that was okay for me. He continued, "My mother lived a miserable life worrying over my father. She nearly tried playing God in my father's life. Unfortunately, she ended up being denied all the enjoyment life would have offered to her while she was trying to protect another. There were visits from one prayer house to another and her life was filled with fasting and doing whatever it was worth to protect her man. In fact, she suffered and relegated her own life as she worried every single day over an issue that was beyond her control."

Elias told me that he was expecting some of his colleagues from his workplace. Probably, for this reason, he concluded his story around 2 pm that Sunday afternoon. "Now, here is the part that got me enriched. It was the part that taught me that worrying does not provide solutions to our problems. Instead, it takes away today’s joy and steals from us all the peaceful moments that we would have had. When my father was 55 years, my mother went to sleep but did not wake up the next day; she died peacefully but full of worries in her sleep. The peace that she could not have in her lifetime surrounded her at death. Ironically, my father, who she sacrificed a worthwhile life for, lived an extra thirty-five years. The danger that my mother feared for did not disappear. They were there all the thirty-five years that my father lived after her death. There was no worrying and fasting wife. There were no more prayer sessions and spiritual communion from my mother. All those family and friends that she classified as threats to my dad were still there even in her absence. Strange enough, my father lived for an extra thirty-five years without my mother needing to protect him! It was one of those great experiences that enriched me. They changed my view of life since ever then. It is a ‘complex easy’ world that we live in. If you understand it, you will live through it as a happy person.”

REFLECTION
I have lived long enough to realise that worrying in life is an absolute waste of time. What happens to us is not within our power. But how we react or respond to them, is. Good things will happen to us. And bad things will too. The rational thing to do is to take life one step at a time and worry less about things not within our control.

When you worry about the seasons- how the rain comes or the sun shines -you might just be trying to shake the Iroko tree to make the tiny dewdrops fall. The parrot said that he stopped worrying about the length of his mouth the day people told him how much talk that came from the same mouth.

If there are many things in your life that could go wrong, there are equally as many others that could go right. Concentrate on the latter option. You would make better forward movement riding on a moving tortoise than riding on a rocking horse. Life is about the choices that we make. Choose your options wisely.

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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Vandora: How A Beating And A Cracked Rib Changed My Life

Vandora epitomizes beauty in a manner that would make Aphrodite jealous. Despite the scar, she has got a figure like one chiselled out so finely by a divine Sculptor. She told me her story like this. "I lost my father when I was six. It was a situation that made life so difficult for my mother and three other siblings. Not that life was completely irredeemable at this point but having no father and being left with a struggling mother gave me the license to roam the streets in the quest to satisfy my needs. I became so notorious on the street. At a time, I was enrolled for a Senior School Certificate Examination but I chose to party and hop from one hotel to another while others took the examination. Jumping from hotel to hotel became my stock in trade. I was born beautiful and so richly endowed that an average man would not resist me. On several occasions I had received a tap on my buttocks from those crazy guys while I walked through the market. There were crazy advances too followed by catcalls. It was always a bad experience dealing with those guys but you wouldn't blame them. What mama actually gave me was a mountain in boots."

The 'mountain in boots' catchphrase got me and I smiled. She smiled back and continued. "It was a life that bought a fair share of embarrassment for me. There was a day a married woman tracked her husband to the hotel. I was the one that got the door when she knocked. She gave me the beating of my life and threw me out in the street naked- with my pants alone and no bra. I was glad the social media was still in its egg stage waiting to be fertilized. It was a viral type of moment. Then again, there was this day that I was locked inside by my mother so that I could not leave in the night to attend a party but I sneaked out and jumped the fence. While driving back the next morning, we got involved in a ghastly motor accident that took one of my eyes and left a huge scar on my pretty face. It put me in a situation that I classified as one that was worse than death. My frustration was over the rooftop, so much so that I found solace in alcohol and drugs. My life was gradually descending into an abyss that took no prisoners."

Vandora had gone through a thorough and well-structured transformation but you could still feel those pugnacious past in her demeanor. There was this toughness and a show of bravado about how she spoke. "It was in the hospital that my redemption started. And how I got there was funny but fateful. There was a day that I was confronted by a soldier who questioned my right to put on a camouflage vest. I was so high and under the influence that I tried to assault him. Two of the soldiers gave me the beating of my life that resulted in a cracked rib and a contortion. I got to the hospital unconscious. The first time I put up a smile was the day a friend came to see me at the hospital. She said to me, "they pummelled you. But, you are a strong girl. I learnt one of the soldiers lost a tooth. That was what infuriated them. They almost killed you if not for the market women that gathered…" It was a report that gladdened my heart. But, I was yet filled with bitterness and revenge. I was sad too because I was missing my alcohol and my joint; a situation that affected my nerves."

In the final stage of our discussion, she said, "The day before my discharge from the hospital. Two Jehovah witnesses members came to my bedside to see me. I was not willing to see them. To me, it was a waste of time but somehow I submitted to a bigger inner power. They were three; a woman, a young girl and a man. It was the preaching from the young girl that changed my life. She told me that my life could still change but the power to do so rested on me. She said that it was my sole responsibility. I got home a changed person. My mother and siblings were in awe about the changes they noticed. To summarise my story, I went back to school and graduated with Nigerian Certificate of Education(NCE). I later went for a Bachelor Of Science degree and this got a lecturing job for me in the end. I got to the office of a deputy vice-chancellor before my retirement. Today, I run a popular private primary and secondary school. I later got married to Jide, the love of my wife. We were blessed with two boys and a girl."

REFLECTION

You may not have the power to rule Nigeria (neither will you have the power to change how the world is being run). But you can change the little world around you by doing what is necessary at every instant.

No one has a hand in how our stories begin. We don't get to choose our parents nor our environments at birth. I quite agree that some folks' lives would have turned out better if they had different parents who did what was needed and necessary for their development. But it still does not overrule the argument that it is only you that can decide how you want your story to end. You have what it takes. If you search within, you can discover all the innate abilities that are relevant for your breakthrough. These abilities adorn your life like diamond deposits. They are there screaming for attention but probably, you keep wanting to be someone else. Stop living under the shadow of a 'fake you'.

Discover who you are. Then, glow and let the world watch you 'burn'.

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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Esther: How Dreams Become A Nightmare

Esther is one of the few I could describe as a goddess. I have never seen a beauty so flawless and intimidating. She started her story this way, “My father and I had some turbulent times living together. There was a time he threatened to disown me. He said he was not going to have any of my stupid and foolish antics anymore. He questioned if I was really his daughter. And this was the part that broke my mother's heart. I was pained that she was caught in the crossfire between my father and I. Literally, she had no part in the brouhaha that led to the meltdown in the relationship between father and daughter. And my father, to my judgement, appeared like one whose bark was more dangerous than his bite. But I was wrong in my judgement because he shocked me when he threw me out of his house. You must be wondering what would have led to this extreme situation, that a father had to throw out her daughter. Well, he wanted to make an aristocrat off me but I wasn't going to have any of the rubbish; I chose to be a seamstress but he wanted me to study law. It was at this juncture that the battle line was drawn.”

Esther continued, “My father wanted to dictate my life and fit it into a narrative he designed for himself. I was thrown out in the street for dissenting despite the fact that I was a female. People tried to talk him out of it but he was adamant. Finally, I gave in to pressure coming from family and friends and accepted his offer so that I could stay home. While reviewing my decision a few days later, I realized that I only had one life to live here on earth. And if this was so, why would I succumb to living a life chosen for me by another person. I knew immediately that to lead a fulfilled life, I must take up the gauntlet and be who I wanted to be. The next day, I took a French leave and hit the street. No one knew where I was. I left the city with the money given to me to purchase the university entry forms a day before. I didn't know where I was going but I was so confident that my dreams would take me to the street of desires where my thirst for a worthwhile life would become quenched. As I entered the capital city of the neighbouring town, I took a cab to the main commercial hub of the city. I asked for the best seamstress in town and after three attempts, I was directed to one. For me, leaving home was already a huge risk but I knew I had to take more to have a peek at success. I stepped in and asked for the proprietress. I went in and told her my story. Her clear attentiveness was a sign that my story got her emotionally. To cut the story short, she took me in and directed me to start work the next day.”

Esther's gown was flawless. I learnt she made it herself. She went on. “When you have a passion for something, nothing, not even a hurricane can stop you. The agreement was that the shop would be my sleeping place but I wasn't ready to let anything stand between my dreams and I. All things being equal, I was even glad that I had someplace to lay my head. My passion for sewing became the unseen driving force. It was like a heavy turbine propelling me to my dreamland. You see, some things are better imagined than done. My thoughts about sewing were those of an easy task but in practice, it was more tasking and mentally demanding than I initially thought. However, I went about my job with the vigour of an expecting mother; very hopeful without having knowledge of how the next nine months could pan out. I struggled but I refused to back down. One day, the head apprentice told me that I was not cut out for sewing. She said it was better that I quit and look for a better way to help my life. That statement got me but deep inside of me, I told myself that the only opinion that mattered was mine. Somehow, I knew my passion would see me through. The strength of my conviction kept me short of a mental breakdown. ”

In the concluding part, she said, “I struggled for the next six months. I was to spend two years undergoing my tutelage but I ended up taking an extra year to actually hone my skills. My situation then was like what we have in the game of football currently between Messi and CR7. Two great legends of the game; one is driven by sheer determination to be the best while the other is effortlessly writing his story using his innate talent. I found myself in the category where sheer determination and the passion to succeed were the sparks that I needed to ignite my life. The moment I was released to open up my shop, I knew from that moment everything was going to be about me. There was no hiding place anymore. I took the challenge head-on and worked tirelessly every night and day. Amazingly, I got better with time. People started trooping in as my customers spread the news by word of mouth. I became so famous that my former boss’ customers started moving over to my place. The switch was so devastating for her that she came to me and proposed a partnership. I accepted the offer because I needed funding to expand my business and she had the capacity to provide whatever that was needed. We expanded and became so big that we started exporting to other African countries. We have been to Germany and France on invitations to two fashion shows. My father and I made up after my first international fashion show; he was amazed at my success in my chosen vocation and gave up. I bought an SUV for him and built a mansion in the city for them. Yes, the bridge was big enough to allow what happened between us in the past to flow away. So, I simply let them flow away”

REFLECTION
What Esther did was not magic; there was no special secret formula. It was easy insisting on chasing her dreams. The only hard part is that people are consumed by the fear to go on adventures like Esther’s. However, the reality of life is that we have only one life to live. And it is better to take a risk leaving it our way than end up struggling under someone else’s shadow. The fear of failure should not deter or discourage us because failure is like that unanswered door that forces one to the right door. So, knocking on it cannot be termed a waste of time. Rather, it is that elixir that pushes us to the answer we have been yearning for. Life is about taking risks. Like the onion bulb, we keep peeling off layers upon layers of failures until we discover that treasure that we have been searching for.

I don’t know how you feel about where you are right now or the life you have led so far. If your heart is not in love with whatever it is, the good news is that you can still walk away and fall in love all over again. But this time, it could be with that one with a reserved place in your heart. Do not let fear get you stuck to that mediocre life. Remember, we have all got one life to live. If you follow your dreams, they will show you the way.

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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Musa: The Volley That Gave Two Hundred Million People Hope

The first verse in the book of success is 'believe in yourself'.

At the World Cup in Russia 2018, the Super Eagles of Nigeria lost their first match of the tournament. They needed to win the second to have the chances of making it to the knock-out stage. A second loss would confirm their exit out of the tournament even before the third and the last one in the group stage.

I saw the bounce and improvement in the steps and play of the Super Eagles in the game against world cup first-timers, Iceland, after Musa almost tore the net with a sweeping volley to score the team's first goal in Russia 2018. Victor Moses’ cross was controlled with one touch, this set him up for an unstoppable half-volley with his second touch. That goal brought back the belief factor that they are there, in Russia, to compete as one of the best from Africa.

You need the same self-belief in your life if you want to become a success. Don't settle for external impressions to inspire you. All you need to deliver has been deposited in you.

REFLECTION
You are one of a kind; the same way your fingerprint is unique to any other.

The Super Eagles did not wait for an own goal to begin that revival after the dismal performance in the first game; this implies that they worked hard to get that first goal. They knew waiting for the opponent to help them win would be irrational and asking for too much. The second goal came and the rest became history.

Don't sit and keep waiting for Own Goals in your life. Don't settle for mediocrity. It is in you: all that you need.

Believe in yourself and go for it! Without self-belief, the desire to achieve something disappears and this makes it impossible for anything reasonable to be accomplished.

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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Trump In Aso Rock, The Easiest Part[b][/b]

In the 2018 FIFA World Cup in Russia, the Belgians were all over the Samba boys in the first half of the second quarterfinals game. They went for the break with two unreplied goals. Neymar and the other lads were stunned and stupefied by the speed and execution of the counter-attacks- honestly, the Brazilians didn't see this coming.

At the end of the game, Roberto Martinez, the Belgian gaffer, said in the post-match interview,

"I never lost a game on the tactics board, it's the execution that matters and the execution was magnificent. Players have to be brave to change the way we play..."

Does that quote ring a bell? I think it does. We hardly lose on the planning board(and this is because we all have the capacity to have limitless dreams). Our drawing board is a beehive of well thought out ideas depicted in pictures and figures. We all have the capacity to build a future in our heads. We can own whatever we want- even the White House - and we can be who we want; but all in our heads. But this is where the hard work ends. We can even take Trump and put him in Aso Rock; that again is just the easy part. There is no question that you have set goals all your life. Your dreams are so perfect and equal to none. It gives you this bounce in your steps when you are done reflecting on them and forming this big picture of success in your head. "The Dangotes, Gates, Zuckerbergs, Bezos, Buffets, and Alibabas of this world ain't seen something", your mind must be saying as you regurgitate the wealth of ideas in your head.

Let me give you the bad news. All will come to nothing if those ideas are not properly executed. That bounce will devour the heels of your shoes and leave you shuffling your feet against the floor as you become old and lose the steam that keeps turning those mental turbines that power your dream world and thought process.

REFLECTION
Ideas do not bring you success; it is the perfect execution that does. Your potentials and innate skills without the correct execution are like fishes trying to survive on land. You must locate the correct habitat for your dreams and begin to do the planting(execution).

To succeed in life, you MUST imbibe and acquire by force the discipline of getting things done. Don't worry about the possible outcome; just take the risk and see what happens at the other end of the episode.

So decide today that you must do the following this week;
Submit that application
Ask for that hand in marriage
Drop that bad habit
Pick that entry form
Find that inner peace in your life
Have that discussion that your marriage needs
Walk up to that girl and simply say, “Hello, I am...”


If there is ever a time to take that required action, it is now!

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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Even Grandma Is A Player
[b][/b]
Mma had been playing all day. But towards the evening, she returned home and complained that she wasn't feeling okay. Granny looked at me, gave me a crooked grin and asked Nma to go and fetch her ragged handbag. I smiled because I knew the handbag in question. I had fetched this same handbag several times when I was Nma's age. Doing it then was more like a ritual; the moment you get passed the age, the younger cousins and siblings won't be far off to take over the task.

Granny asked me, "why are you smiling."

I responded, "I used to think monsters lived in that bag. Granny, you knew it was a punishment whenever you sent me to go get that handbag, but you didn't stop. Anyway, thank God my successors don't feel much of that way."

Granny let out a giggle. Thereafter, she attempted bursting into laughter but she suppressed it as she saw Nma coming.

Nma walked over sluggishly and handed over the handbag to granny. She seemed as if she was struggling as she dragged her feet across the room to deliver the bag; one could easily see that all was not well with her. Granny dipped her hand into the bag and fumbled for a while before producing a mini white envelope; that very small one that had become synonymous with drugs. She unsealed it, picked a tablet and dropped it into Nma's small palm. Nma guzzled some water, raised her head and quickly sank the tablet inside her mouth. She swallowed it with a wince on her face. Grandma rubbed her palm against her left shoulder and said,
"The drug will help you. You will be fine"

Nma nodded in affirmation and quietly walked over to the room adjacent to the kitchen. She went to a sofa across the room and lowered herself. After a little while, we heard her giggling outside with other kids. I knew what game Grandma played on her. She played the same game on us but you would never know until you become initiated into proper adulthood.

REFLECTION
I learnt a lot from Grandma. You can never be with her and not learn from her wisdom. She was wisdom personified. You can't help being enthusiastic about being around her. What she administered to Nma was a placebo. That tablet was completely inert and had no active ingredient that could affect health. Grandma always had some in her ragged bag. I had a fair dose of mine growing up.

I learnt one thing from these experiences. There are times in our lives that we do not need to see if what is happening to us is the answer that we need. Life is deep and an adventure at the same time. We might as well just look at things happening around us, take them in good faith and bounce around like Nma. Nma had no business confirming what Granny gave to her. We didn't question it during our own time but swallowing those sugar pills gave us the hope that Granny had done her usual magic. We all took them in good faith and healing happened thereafter. We would dash outside again enjoying life.

Some of the bitter moments life throws at us are there to enrich or even make us stronger. But some of us worry too much that we lose the fun of living. Your faith has to be much bigger than your fears.

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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Stanley: From Heathrow To Murtala, Yet He Did Not See It Coming

It was a very hot Sunday afternoon and one of those rare occasions that I had the opportunity to speak with people on how they handled adversity. Stanley seemed lively when I met him with a half-filled bottle of Heineken sitting on a table that was positioned between his legs. He said, “My parents died before I was fifteen. Actually, my father was lost to a chronic lung disease while my mother joined him two years later, after battling with cancer for 6 years. For these reasons, growing up was tough. My only sibling, my elder sister, was moved along with me from one relative to another for sustenance. Don't they say that rolling stones gather no moss? In our case, we did gather some moss; there were mental and psychological scars from the challenges we faced with some of the families who treated us harshly because our parents were no longer there to protect us. To say that life was menacing to us would be the greatest understatement of the century. I keep wondering to date why people neglect growing kids when their parents die. These were the same people who spoilt us with gifts when our parents were alive. But then, not even a single one of them was ready to care for us without reservations(much less train us through college). As luck would have it, I met a travel agent who after listening to my story agreed to help me travel to Europe. The arrangement was to help me get to the UK and then pay back by installments. The documents were signed by my only sister and me.”

Stanley continued, “My trip to the UK was a success but things got worse over there. The arrangement we had was for me to spend some time with one Mr Kunle that was introduced to me by the agent. Mr Kunle was nice on my arrival but it was only for the first week. Things changed when he started getting jobs for me. He would push me through hard labour but at the end, he would collect the money and release only about 5% to me. This infuriated me but I was advised by someone not to confront him or else they would stab me in the back by reporting me to the authorities. Surviving abroad without documents is the toughest way to survive on planet earth. People will blatantly cheat you and drag you through hell because they know you can’t run to the police nor any authority for help. There was a day I sat and cried my eyes out; I went to do a job with Mr Kunle but he went behind me and collected the whole £520. Feeding was so difficult for me that very week. I was so enraged that I confronted Mr Kunle to refund my share of the money. The following week, I was arrested on the train on my way back from work. Deportation followed and within a few days, I found myself back in Nigeria.”

Stanley beckoned on the waiter to come and clear the empty bottle on the table. Stanley doesn't drink much- he would have had a bottle or two at that point. “The moment I walked down from the plane, the hot wind hit me on the face. I smiled, because at that moment, I realized I missed the freedom I enjoyed in Nigeria; at least, nobody would demand for my documents on the streets. My sister was waiting for me when I arrived home. She embraced me and we cried together while holding each other in a tight grip. While waiting for deportation in the UK, I resolved that I must hit the ground running immediately when I returned to Nigeria. I told myself that I must exorcise myself of all blames and regrets. I didn't want to blame Mr kunle nor anyone for my woes. I knew if I must move forward, that I must take responsibility for my problems. After a few days, I sat down with my sister to ascertain how much money I remitted to her for my savings within the few months that I spent in the UK. We arrived at over a million Naira(about $2800). We travelled to Nnewi the next day and got the tricycle popularly known as Keke so that I could use it for a commercial purpose. The Keke arrived home the next day because we had to put some other things in order. My elder sister sat me down and told me that the worst that could ever happen to me was to lead a plan-less life. So, the two of us sat down and drew a five-year plan. The idea was to buy three more tricycles within the next five years. The next phase was to design a blueprint.”

In closing, he said, “The next thing I did was to sit with my sister and structure my goals by breaking my vision into measurable steps. Since it took us N420,000 ($1,100) to get my tricycle, we drew a budget on how to raise money for another within the following eighteen months. However, considering inflation and related factors, we set the budget for N600,000 ($1,580) per tricycle. This gave us a budget of N33,000($87) per month and about N1,000(about $3) per day. I set up an account where N1,000 must be deposited every day. On Mondays, I made the deposit to accommodate Saturday and Sunday. The next thing that I did was to cut an image of Keke and pasted it in my room where my sight could reach it every morning as I knelt to pray. The idea was to remind me every time that I wanted to stray that I had a dedicated project to execute. It worked for me because it continued to beat me into my set goals. To summarize my story, I was able to achieve Six tricycles within the five years stipulated in the plan. We exceeded our expectations because we cut the same budget for every tricycle that we bought. I went off the road to create enough time to manage the fleet of Keke as it grew. I set a ten-year plan which was to have five commercial buses on the road within the specified timeline. My sister and I put up a roadmap for this. She has been of immense help. I will be getting married soon and I hope to integrate my wife into the ten-year roadmap.”

REFLECTION
This discussion happened two years ago. In between, Stanley got married and the marriage has been blessed with a baby boy. It took them two years to achieve the first commercial bus which is already on the road. I learnt that the second one is almost settled. The Tricycle(Keke) has increased to ten and he has added two shuttle buses. He is surely living the good life.

You see, every day we are hit with challenges. But the people who emerge stronger are those that wake up the next day and respond positively. I know a couple of people who got to Nigeria and killed their dreams because they got deported from abroad. They saw this as the end of the road for them and they ended up rightly so. Every shortcoming, in whatever shape, presents an opportunity for equivalent or better benefit. That day that Stanley alighted from the plane, he probably did not see the progress that he had made coming. Thanks to his sister who helped in saving his money and steering him to the path of success.

Know it today that adversity and hard times do not help you develop strength overnight; rather they reveal the strength inherent in you. At birth, everything you need to prosper was deposited in you. So, you have got what it takes. No matter what challenge life has put you through, brace up yourself and confront it squarely. You will be amazed at how many life-changing opportunities you might stumble on.

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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Brenda: The Dumb Lawyer That Got saved By Persistence

Brenda was sitting behind a big desk with his portrait picture hanging directly over his head. He said, “Growing up, the law profession fascinated me more than any other. The sight of a lawyer alone gave me goose pimples. Even as a kid, I used to wish that my father was a lawyer- not because I could use it to brag about, but for the mere fact that I could sneak into his room at times and don his regalia(particularly the gown and the wig). None of my direct family members was surprised when I chose to study law at the university. Unfortunately, after four years of trying, I was still writing the entrance exam to study law. When the pressure of being at home became overbearing, I put in the request to study English(Single Honours) in one of the State universities. As expected, the school fees for the five years I spent there was mind-boggling. I saw your eyes light up the moment that I mentioned five years. Let me explain- it was because I had a missing script in my final year. Strange enough, I was made to return for a re-sit even after a thorough investigation proved that I sat for that paper. In fact, my name was clearly captured in the attendance register for the examination and my classmates confirmed that I was with them in the hall till the end of that very paper. Yet, someone bought an extra year for me with his carelessness”

I looked at the massive shelf in Brenda’s office and wondered if he had read all the books in it. He continued talking. “After graduation, I was happy that I finally did it. But I still felt unfulfilled. Passing through here without putting that wig, for me, would be a huge failure. I remember coming across a maxim that said that persistence could drive an iron beam through a needle. That was exactly the driving force that I needed. I went back and took the entrance examination to study law. I failed yet again. But I was undeterred because I knew the only way I could match my dreams to my realities was through persistence. I went again for the entrance examination. This time around, I was quite lucky. I was offered admission to chase my dreams in the well respected University Of Nigeria Nsukka(Enugu Campus). These happened during the military era. So, there were challenges. Yet, I graduated in the end and was later called to the bar. That was the happiest moment of my life- that moment that I finally wore the most cherished gown and the matching headgear. It was that moment that you see the dreamer and the dream metamorphose into great storylines that you can only find in Disney.”

The intercom rang. It seemed someone was out there to see Brenda, from the way he spoke to the person at the other end. He dropped the receiver and continued, “You see, when life is prepared to deal someone some hard blows, they come in perfect combinations. Life doesn't play by the rules when it comes to this game. It would hit one below the belt if the opportunity presented itself. Anyway, while I was returning home from the call to bar ceremony, I got involved in a fatal road accident that took two lives. I survived but I was reduced to the wheelchair as a consequence of the accident. Shockingly enough, I lost my voice owing to a heavy injury I received on the head. It was so bad that the doctor told my parents in confidence that I was never going to talk again. But out of the fear of what I could do to myself, they kept this information away from me. They would have played by the truism that says, 'It is better not to know certain things because what you do not know won't hurt you.' I kept fighting every day waiting for that day that I would stand in the court for the first time to either defend or prosecute. I kept investing the money I had in purchasing law books. I voraciously read law journals, upon journals. I began to succumb to my predicament when I waited for more than one year without success. Then one day, I was going through my father's locker when I found, “The Power Of Positive Thinking” by Norman Vincent Peale. It rekindled the fire in me once more. And I started believing again.”

I discovered that he was rushing to conclude the story probably because of the person waiting outside. He said in closing, “One night, my father came home looking so tired and sad. I demanded what the issues were using sign language. He opened up and told me a pitiful story about my uncle who was a businessman then. A company that he was dealing with breached the agreement they had and I learnt it would cost him N20 Million($56,000) in losses if no legal action was taken in his defence. I became crest-fallen for not being able to help. That night, I could not sleep; I was lost in very deep thoughts. I woke up late the following morning and got out of bed. I noticed something different about that day. When my father worked in, to our greatest amazement, I opened my mouth and offered a greeting. Oh my goodness! All hell was let loose. There was pandemonium everywhere as people jubilated. I was screaming at the top of my voice this time. To cut the story short. I finally stood in court to defend my uncle and at the end, judgement was given in our favour. It was a sweet victory; my first time in court and my first time standing as counsel for my uncle who was part of the reason I was able to graduate as a lawyer. That was the moment that I realized that you just can't beat the person who never gives up.”

REFLECTION.
Brenda’s story touched me. I got home and thought about this story all through the night. These were persistence and never give up attitude personified. I realized that nothing in this world, I repeat nothing, can ever displace persistence. It is with persistence that droplets of water from a tap create a big hole in the ground directly under it. It keeps breaking away the cement or earth, bit by bit until a massive hole is formed underneath. That is the power of persistence.

Great things have been achieved in the world by people who refused to quit despite all the challenges that stood before them. They were able to surmount those because they refused to quit. They kept trying again, again and again until something gave. Brenda took a long walk to have his first appearance in court. Are you ready to take such a long walk? What is that thing that troubles you today? Have you given as much as Brenda committed to reaching the milestone that he achieved? If you want victory in life, you must master the art of persistence. If you knock hard enough, even Pharaoh might listen to you. Do not give up yet!

INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Jonas: Job Wouldn't Be In The Bible If I Was Born Before Him

Jonas is a big lad. You wouldn’t believe life could have the courage to deal him some hard blows. He said, “It has to be Job(biblical). Sure, it has to be him. No one under the surface of the planet earth has been through what I have seen in life. I faced rejection right from birth. My father probably did not want to be in my life. I felt so because I learnt that I was picked from the gutter just within 3 days of arriving here. And the only reason my mother would have left me there could be for the fact that none of them, she and my father, wanted me. I was found by a good woman who was on her way to work. Even though she was reported to be well to do, she too didn't want me. This was how I ended up in the orphanage, which became home for me. Living in the orphanage was the only good moment (before now though) recorded in my life; for having no parents, we lived for each other. Every other aspect of my growing up was inhumane and unpleasant.”

He took a sip from the glass on the table and continued. “The moment I became eighteen, I left the orphanage to see what life had in stock for me. At this juncture, I became exposed and was dragged through the rough edges of life owing to my vulnerability- an experience that left me with obvious psychological and emotional scars. Honestly, I wear the scars till date but I have refused to let them sink me or determine how I live going forward. The first job I did was working as a bus conductor. This exposed me to the life of ‘rascals and jackals’ in the park. The boys would gather after work to get high; to drink, smoke and patronize the sex workers. Life in the park then, and to some extent now, was one that gave with one hand but ended up siphoning whatever was given with the other hand. The money that the drivers and the conductors made in the park disappeared in the bars and 'batchers'(wooden houses popularly seen in Nigerian parks) where they drank and smoked away their sweat as they took refuge in the arms of the commercial sex workers. I was almost caught up in that 'siphon system' but somehow nature for a reason I am yet to decipher didn't let that happen. It was in the line of duty that I lost this eye(he removed his dark shade so that I could see the bad eye)- our bus was involved in a fatal road accident. Three lives were lost. I survived it but one of my eyes was used as a bargain for my life.”

I could see why his friends christened him the fish; Jonas opened the next can of water and emptied it into the glass cup. “I left the bus conductor job and went for an apprenticeship with a qualified and popular mechanic in the city. I was meant to understudy him for five years and then get released with some little start-up as captured in the contract. However, in my fifth and final year, the mechanic lost his wife to the cold hands of death. He pleaded with me to give him an extra year to help him recover from the loss. Life was not easy for me but I did accept it. At the end of the extra year, we lost the mechanic to prostate cancer. This left me in a deep mess. I was heartbroken and devastated. That moment was like a rising sun that came crashing before sunset. Based on an agreement between myself, an orphan, and the mechanic's relations, I was begged to run my deceased boss' workshop for another year to keep the customers (and the money flowing for his immediate surviving children). One evening, I went to test drive a fixed car with a customer, another car took a one-way road and ended up in a head-on collision with our vehicle; I lost a finger while the owner of the car, who was riding with me on the passenger side, lost a leg. My life hung on life support while I lay in a coma in the hospital recovering.”

He concluded this way. “The owner of the vehicle that hit our car was a very wealthy politician. He did not want the news to get out there for unknown reasons. He took care of the hospital bills. When my story was narrated to him, he was touched. He gave me a bus from his fleet as a gift (and palliative) as soon as I was discharged from the hospital. Using the bus as a private vehicle did not make sense to me; remember that I was struggling to put food on the table then. Rather, I chose to give it out on hire purchase. From there I was able to increase my fleet to 15 buses, 10 tricycles and 6 shuttle buses within ten years. You might wonder how I was able to achieve this. Don't look that far; all the hard times I went through toughened me and they all had roles to play in achieving those stellar milestones. Let me tell you how- my apprenticeship as a mechanic kept me ahead of the driver's antics; my role as a bus conductor always kept me two moves ahead of them while the accident that took my eye and a finger compelled me to commercialize the bus since I was not allowed by law to drive in the condition I was left in. Like the final pieces of the jigsaw puzzle, I realized that nature had been taking me through tough life's lessons to prepare me for this time. The scars are there but today, I feel less pain as I get closer to the stars in the sky."

REFLECTION
Life is not fair. We talk about the divide between the rich and the poor. We keep wondering why some live in affluence while the other group wallow in abject poverty. It is what it is and there is nothing anybody can do about this situation.

I have good news for those who believe that they are at the negative side of this divide. How you react to what shade life throws is central to how successfully you manage adversity. And again, life through experiences has offered us a veritable platform to be tutored in the things of life. This is why experience will always be considered a fantastic teacher. Everything we go through in life prepares us for the next thing and the next, and so on. Whatever hard times you are going through right now will prepare you for extraordinary moments.

The fact that you are still alive means that you are bigger than what it is that is troubling you. You are still breathing and dreaming! Do not play the victim game. It will eat you up. No one can save you except you. All you need to do is hold on and muster the courage to go through each day looking forward to the next. One day, you would look back and see how life trained you for the good life that was to come.


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https://anekearinzeblog.com

INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Being 30 But Yet Single Choked Her Until This Happened

Nene was a controversial one way back in school. Her philosophies about life would always evoke some divisions. But today, I listened to her story with an open mind. She said, “Culture does a lot of imposition on us. That we become exposed to a cultural belief by birth is one big factor in our development that nobody can do anything about. Well, we do not choose our parents. And a whole lot of our growing up is dependent on our spiritual(religious) and social(environmental) factors. Being exposed to the culture of a people by mere association is less demanding compared to doing so through birth. The pressure that being born in a Muslim or Christian family would exert on one cannot be compared to what would be exerted by association. I was the first child and the first female in a family of three girls and a boy. My woes started when Brian came to ask for my younger sister's hand in marriage. I was done with school and looking for a job when this happened- I was already 26 years then. I didn't know what it was exactly but I felt something was cooking; that is, that my mother was trying to tell me something but somehow came short of doing so. Then one early morning -I believed she couldn't hold up any longer- she woke me up around 1 a.m. to spill the beans. I was told that Brian was coming to ask for my younger sister's hand in marriage. But my mother was put under immense pressure by a notion imposed on her by our culture. It was a popular but muffled taboo in the African community that a young woman's younger female siblings should not walk down the aisle before her.”

She came up with a wry smile and then continued, “There was nothing anyone could do about the situation because no suitor of choice was coming for me. When my parents failed in forcing their choices down my throat, they gave up and went ahead with the wedding. Within a year, the baby came and my sister became the worthy mum that I was not. Her opinion in the family became like the pontiff’s that no one questioned. My misery took a different shape when my other sister came home with a suitor. I was in my early thirties and the frustration was already getting at me. I was happy that my baby sister was going to fulfil her dreams of becoming a complete woman. But the anguish that I had been left behind in the whole process overshadowed that happiness. That night while everyone was asleep, I wept myself silly, until dawn. My mother read it from the look on my face that morning but she did not ask me. She told me many years later that she could not bear the emotional burden of asking.”

I felt the pains in her eyes but it was impermanent. She went on. “The frustration did not only affect my health, but it also affected the decisions that I made. I became so vulnerable to every man that seemed like a suitor before my eyes. I was taken advantage of; even used and dumped. I lost my job when I fell prey to a man who seemed to have an interest in marrying me even though he never mentioned it. I breached the company’s policy for his sake and was found out. With no job in sight, I decided to start a small business with the little that I saved from my previous job. But I fell prey to another man who swindled me and ran away with my whole life savings. This was when I decided that enough was enough. I realized that it was better to remain single than end up with the wrong person. I knew right then that choosing happiness was going to be a no-brainer if I had to choose between being married and being happy. After all, marriage in itself has no direct correlation with being happy; it is the relationship between married couples that does. It became that important corner in my journey that had evaded me all the while. I took the turn, stopped whining and never allowed any man to take me for granted. I pushed marriage to the backseat and chose to do something more exciting with my life.”

Nene closed our discussion by saying, “I talked to family and friends who raised some money for me. I went back into business but this time, I made better decisions. Having come to terms with myself that living a fulfilled life was not dependent on being married, I stopped men from taking advantage of me. My business grew in leaps and bounds. I was doing so well and funny enough I regained my respect in my parent's eyes as the eldest. I came to the full realization that their former attitude towards me was not simply about not being married but more about not being able to take more responsibilities about my life. In one of the national conventions of an association under my constituency, an invite was sent to me in the capacity of a guest speaker. I met Blossom at the convention. He was a nice, single and successful businessman. We have been dating for six months to date. I don't know where the relationship would take us but I am no longer in a hurry to know. This is because I have long realized that my happiness is not tied to whichever way the relationship pans out. I know our African culture puts a lot of pressure on single ladies but they should understand that no one owes them a ring on the finger. Do not let anyone make you feel any less fulfilled because no one has put a ring on your finger. You can fulfil your dreams even as a single lady.”

REFLECTION
Marriage is good but doing it with the right person is the single most important part of the process. We should make lightweight the pressure that culture exerts on single ladies and gents. In as much as marriage is desirable, there are people who walked into it and discovered a living hell. The myth that bearing a man’s name gives a woman self-worth is a total fallacy. In the same vein, telling a young man that being married draws more respect for him is out of place. One of the most respected males in the world is Pope Benedict. The last time I checked he was not married and he was already in his late seventies.

What is more important is finding a purpose for being here and going for it. Being married has never been a prerequisite to discovering who we are or making the most out of life. Happiness is a switch and once you are ready to reach for it, nothing else stands in your way. Reach out and flip that switch irrespective of whether you are single or married. Choose happiness and focus on adding meaning and value to your life.

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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- That Curse Might Be Yours To Put Down But You Need To Know How

Looking at Kingsley, my friend's favourite proverb came to mind; “you can never tell from an old woman's lips that she ever used it for suckling a nipple.” He started this way, “Everything changed the moment I began to question my actions and all my key decisions. I was going to be forty in a couple of years ahead but aside from the beard I wore on the jaw and both cheeks, there was nothing else to show, for at least, the time I had been around on the planet trying to survive. It got to the point that my friends baptized me ‘food is ready’. It was an attempt to embarrass me for relying heavily on my mother for feeding(survival). My father died when I was five; leaving my mother with the responsibility of taking care of my siblings and I. There were expectations placed on me as the first son but like a striker who lacked confidence, I wasted all the opportunities presented to me; and the only reason this team(my family) stayed above board was because of my mother. She was like the super goalie that kept a poor team in the game with stellar ‘saves-upon-saves’ performance. There was a day I shed tears because of my situation; my mother despite being seriously ill had to pick herself up so that she could go to the market and make some sales. With the able me, that wouldn't have happened.”

He licked his lips yet again, and then continued, “I had to sit one day to reflect on my journey. I recall leaving school when I was five. The idea was to go in early for apprenticeship, graduate and then establish my own business. I was hoping that by the time my peers were through college and university, I would have achieved financial freedom or perhaps carve a big niche in my area of business. Everything was in perfect shape except that I wasn't ready yet in keeping my side of the bargain. Right from day one in my master’s place, I made several wrong choices and within two years, I was back to where I started from- that was home. On my return, there was an urgent consensus to get me back on track. Within a few weeks of returning, I was shipped out for the second time to understudy a painter. My time there was short too. Within a couple of months, I found my way back home. When my parents felt the apprenticeship thing was not working for all the parties involved, they had a meeting and reached the unanimous agreement to package me back to school.”

Nodding in agreement encouraged him. He said, “I was not too old but getting back to school for me was like coming to church in a party dress- everything seemed odd to me. And for these reasons, my situation was not getting better. There was no proviso to my going back to school but I felt the pressure to make it a success by all means. I got entangled with a lot of girls and such life must come with consequences. Grace and Blessing, two teenage girls, became pregnant for me. These are names one would expect to become associated with for a life-changing effect but mine went south with both in my life. The wages? I was handed a piece of decisive expulsion advice from school. I was back to square one. At this point, there was only one line of thought; that I was under a curse that I needed to be cleansed of. Recommendations started pouring in from assumed stakeholders. Native doctors, the clergy and all forms of spiritual representations made the list.”

In closing, Kingsley slowed down but said, “It was at this point that my redemption arrived like a white dove that came to reshape a battered life. Somehow, and perhaps because of my faith which had not been tainted, I rejected their plans. I quickly left town to spend some time with a friend so the pressure could simmer down. It was there that my eyes were opened to my blind side. With my friend, I took a journey down memory lane and all my mistakes began to open like a can of worms looking for absolution. It was a situation that came up with one obvious result; that I had been the one stopping myself all those while. We took a journey through all the trouble points and the decisions that birthed them. It was so glaring that I had been the source of my sojourn in the desert of life. I didn't need anyone to make me realize that those bad decisions that I made defined my future, the very one that I was grappling with. I saw myself sitting in a bouquet of consequences that derived from those delinquent years. That moment of truth changed my life. I went home and summoned my people. I let them know there was no curse. I told them if ever there was one, that it should be me. To their utter amazement, the foundation of my turning point was remarkably established that day. Since then(to date), before I take any decision, I always ask myself, "Can you take responsibility or bear the consequences of this decision?” It became my cardinal rule and life has been beautiful ever since.”

REFLECTION
Our lives must bear the consequences of the decisions that we take. Unfortunately, most people either do not realize this or they do so very late. And again, it is not only the decisions that we make that shape our future; those we shy away from making, form a fundamental part of what our tomorrow becomes.

Every action comes with a consequence. Just like Kingsley realized, make sure that you are prepared for those consequences before you take them.

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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- Your Ideas Could Be Worth More Than Jeff Bezos If You Do This

The myth that it takes JUST money to make money has so divided opinions across a distinct line. As much as I agree people are entitled to their opinions, I see it as preposterous for one to believe it takes just money to make money. The myth is one of the greatest success inhibitors I have ever come across. It devours the psyche and helps one find excuses not to chase one's dreams.

Great ideas(dreams), great desires and hard work can guarantee you money if you mix them in the right proportion. I have seen people who became rich overnight, through lottery or inheritance, lose all the money as quickly as it came because there were no plans nor a roadmap owing to the dearth of great ideas(vision) to sustain their newly found wealth.

Great ideas(dreams), with the right proportion of desire and hard work, have an unwavering affinity with money. I know people who developed great ideas and became rich by having people invest in the ideas because they shared in the dreams and so believed in it. Facebook was a great idea. UBER was a great one too. It brought taxi services to our electronic devices in an unprecedented way. Uber drivers register with the company but use their own vehicles- although drivers can rent a car to drive with Uber.

I was told a story about a technician that was invited to fix a ship after several individuals and tech companies had tried with no results. He arrived with his tool kit, walked around, picked a work tool and tapped somewhere within the engine. The engine sputtered into life immediately. When he served his bill, the manager of the shipping company screamed when he was served a $10,000 invoice. He asked the technician, "all these for just tapping?" The technician smiled and responded, " yes, $1 for tapping and the balance of $9,999 for knowing where to tap." Ideas(knowledge) beget money!

Dangote group with all her money-power could not break into the noodle's market in Nigeria because of the Indomie brand. I was told they later sold off the noodle line to Dufil, the owners of Indomie, when the margins could not improve. Great ideas(not just money) that translated into marketing and product strategies gave Indomie the edge and definitely, the money followed.

We should worry more about transforming our dreams into great ideas and worry less about the money part. If the ideas and strategies are right, the money would follow; great ideas will definitely beget money. It did for Dell. It did for Steve Jobs. Bill Gates took an idea and built an empire out of it. Zuckerberg did it with Facebook. Henry Ford did too. It was Ford that said that he could rebuild his empire if all his cars and factories were destroyed but the people with the right attitude, ideas and knowledge were left with him.

Moreover, I have always thought, “what would the youth of this generation have made of the same apple that brought Isaac Newton fame and success?” They would have probably eaten or sold it off without giving a hoot about the force or the fundamental law that made it fall downwards instead of the other way. It is no longer news that Sir Newton did otherwise and discovered the force of gravity in the process. Whatever the mind can think, the same mind can achieve.

REFLECTION
The world is changing every day. Same with the way we do things. I have had a lot of online training since the emergence of the Covid-19 pandemic. I participated in all from the comfort of my home; in fact, in one instance, I was lying on my bed listening and taking down notes. Days are gone when meetings and training are held in big auditoriums and halls. People now sit at the comfort of their homes and have a discussion with colleagues and business associates scattered across the world. This is why a platform like ZOOM will continue smiling to the bank.

There are a lot of venture capital firms or even ‘angel investors’ out there looking for credible and veritable start-ups(ideas) to invest in. They are ready to bankroll start-ups that seem to have long term growth potential. What about those ideas that you have always thought about? Look around you to observe the challenges that exist and begin to search for solutions to them. If there are existing processes around you, have you thought about other ways they can be made better or more efficient? Have you thought about ways certain things could be done that will reduce cost without compromising quality; therein lies all the money!

Finally, let me leave you with this quote by Henry Ford, "thinking is the hardest work there is, which is probably the reason why so few engage in it." Note, he did not say making money is the hardest work there is- thinking is.

For more stories:
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INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- In Spite Of The Fire And The Rent, What She Did Surprised Everyone

Joanne said, “I had been in business for a while. Those were ten years of good and bad moments. I left a paying job to venture into business. They were two completely different terrains; for the job, your salary comes periodically, while in business, you could go for days without sales but you can as well kill it in one particular day. So, there were bad days that could break a lion’s heart owing to poor activities and there were good ones that could raise butterflies in Cinderella’s belly. Even though I had my fair share of good moments, I wore some of the key bad ones like scars on my mind. I remember the day I received a distressed phone call that my shop was on fire. I grabbed a wrapper and tied it over my bosom because I was still in my nightwear. When I approached the street where my shop was, I saw a very bright flame puffing a thick black smoke into the night sky. There were silhouettes of people in the bedlam trying to quench the fire. By the time the fire was put out, I had lost essentially every stock in the shop. It was a black night illuminated by the fire to present a glowing skyline. Unfortunately, there was no beauty in this destruction and I had no fire insurance on my stock. It was an eye opener for me.”

She continued, while I listened, “I walked us back by two years to replay this sad moment. But things had been looking up since that sad incident. I was picking up gradually and getting back to where I was before the fire incident. Then, out of the blue came the COVID-19 pandemic that forced all economic activities to be shut down. I saw my business moving from the ‘outpatient’ to the ‘intensive care unit(ICU)’. While I was still trying to save my business from being declared an emergency, my landlord threw in his demand for rent. It was a crazy situation for me. I had a false notion that I was near recovery but the pandemic and my landlord put in a concerted effort to disabuse this faulted thinking- a notion that was under life support on arrival. I got home that day and left a heap of myself on the bed. There was no one to go to; the few I would have gone to had supported me throughout the trial period(immediately after the fire incident) and during the lockdown. The landlord gave me till the end of the month, otherwise, he would serve a quit notice to me.”

Joanne paused for a while to attend to her phone and then went on, “While the countdown was on, I tried talking to a couple of family and friends to see what advice they had for me. One told me it was not possible to exit me with a short notice while the other unrolled the sermon on the mountain detailing how it was wrong to evict me during a pandemic. The only option I had was to raise money by selling my goods but because of the fire incident and the lockdown, I was left with only old versions of products in stock. When there was no help in sight, I started preparing to leave instead of facing an embarrassing eviction. On the 25th day of the subject month, knowing I had five more days, I cleaned up my house and created a space for my goods and other items in the shop. Sleep served my eyes a divorce letter. I would roll on end in the bed at nights searching for a way to root out my challenges and start afresh. Two days to the deadline, I fell sick. By this time, I could barely eat- I had completely lost my appetite for anything edible. I was a walking dead.”

In closing, she said, “As the hours ticked, I felt that tether that bound me to hopelessness pulling me closer. I was not visiting the shop any longer- i just stayed home and wandered in oblivion. Incidentally, on the eve of the deadline, I was in bed reminiscing about the good old times when I left my job and went into business. They were filled with hopes of better and amazing things to come. How things went wrong, I could not say. While I was lost in those thoughts my phone rang;
Me: Hello
Caller: Hello. Is this Joanne?
Me: Yes
Caller: I was told by my customer that you have some old models of phones that we need
Me: (my heartbeat was already kicking against my rib cage) Yes
Caller: Can you supply about 200 cartons to us? We need them as control specimen for a very important project

By this time, I was already struggling to hear the caller clearly; my heartbeat was pounding so much that my eardrum could barely have space for another sound. I quickly changed position and placed my left palm on my chest as if I could hold my heartbeat.

Me: Hello, Hello, Hello…(I repeatedly said with a tensed voice)
Caller: I am with you. Send me the direction of your office. We need these urgently. See you tomorrow

The line went dead. I could not believe it. I started screaming like a mad man. One of my neighbours came to check on me- they did this at the slightest noise because they were concerned I could be thinking suicide. When I told him, we started dancing together. I knew it was wrong to count my chickens before they hatched but I went out in the cold night and had some fresh fish and a bottle of beer. I thought, “we only die once”

REFLECTION
Always remember that today, which is the present, is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday. When you worry too much, it denies the mind, the ‘oxygen’ that it needs for better thinking and strategy. Instead of worrying, search for opportunities and grab them the moment you sense any. Joanne supplied over 200 cartons of the products that had been with her for over one year lying fallow. Nobody wanted those but on the day that it mattered most, someone came knocking. She used the money to bring in some newer models and business has been booming. By the way, the landlord got his rent and some bottles of chilled beer from Joane.

I don't know what challenges that stare you in the face. But just like Joanne, help will come when it matters most.

For more inspirational stories:
https://anekearinzeblog.com

INSPIRATIONAL SHOT- He Died But Came Back From The Dead For This.

I was so weak when they led me to the car. I didn't know how it happened but I suddenly began to feel sick. My head was aching and my eyes were shutting down. The more I tried to focus my vision, the more blurred it became. I heard my wife crying out, “His body is too hot. What is all this? God, save me from this double tragedy?”

The pandemonium from neighbours around and the sobbing from my wife were quite unsettling. I could hear her clearly and wanted to make her stop. I tried to speak to her but my mouth could not move. It was as if my jaw had been dismantled and my mouth gagged. I was struggling and trying to fight back but I was too weak to make any meaningful progress. I knew I was dying and needed help. I heard my wife sobbing hopelessly and suddenly there was quiet everywhere. I woke up and came down from the bed. A lot of strange people were moving around and they were so impassive as if they were working under a spell. They kept moving into a small room, one after the other without any trace of coercion.

I felt a tap on my shoulder. I flinched and then turned towards the angle the touch came from with a little bewilderment. A strange voice instructed me to step into a small room with a bold instruction ‘Unauthorized’ pasted on the entrance door. I started drifting into the room effortlessly and the moment I got to a seat, the voice asked, “what brought you here?”
The following ensued between us:

Me:
My son did.

Strange Voice:
How?

Me:
He was born in the fifth year of our marriage. We were childless before his birth. And no other child came after him even after making several concerted attempts. He became the only eye in my head. I could not think about a world without him.

Strange Voice:
How did you get here?

Me:
I became hypertensive five years ago. This happened when my son was in his third year in the University. He was attacked by unknown cultists and we all thought he was going to die. Owing to too much worrying and the fact that my late parents were hypertensive, I got myself registered into the family book of hypertensive cases. Anyway, it was more hereditary than situation induced. But the five years of waiting and the attack played their parts.

The lighting in the small room twitched and dimmed a bit. There were screams outside the room and a large noise like that of a heavy item crashing on a concrete floor. There was quiet and the flapping of feathers like those of some birds trying to stretch some muscles. I tried to move but my limbs refused to respond; they were numb and without life.

The strange voice:
I can see that you take every issue as a life and death issue but unfortunately for you, worrying did not save you from any trouble; rather, it walked you closer to the guillotine. So, how did you get here?

Me:
My son, Bright, was involved in a ghastly motor accident one week to his wedding. Fortunately for him, he came out of the vehicle alive but we were told at the hospital that he was not going to survive. I thought about life without him and this drove me into depression. I resorted to suicide by trying to poison myself. I was found at the verge of death before my wife and neighbours rushed me here. She is outside waiting.

Strange Voice:
(a cool wind filtered into the room) You are very far from your wife. It took you a very long journey to be here. And there is no going back. The noises that came from the room outside is where we restrict people who are trying to force a return. It is a one-way traffic. And you have been here for three months waiting on the queue to see me.

Me:
(I started gasping for breath as the cool wind ran through my body) Please, you need to help me. It was a huge mistake on my part. I became obsessed with our son that I forgot that my wife who loved me beyond measure existed. Now that both of us, Bright and I, have gone far from her, she would lead a very heart-wrenching and lonely life. I need someone to console here. And no one is in a better position to do this than me.

Strange Voice:
You allowed your thoughts to play games with you. Nothing troubles one more than one's own thoughts. Most of the things that we worry about end up not happening. Worrying does not solve tomorrow’s problems. You will only become so much consumed by your thoughts that you miss the little joys of the present day. In your case, it got you to the end of the road, where the living are scared to tread.

Me:
I fell on the floor sobbing and shaking uncontrollably.

Strange Voice:
Anxiety does not lift a finger towards anything. You were like a man on a treadmill doing all the work but making no forward progress. You were given life in abundance to enjoy a peace-filled life but for no reason you decided to end what you did not create. You have earned one lifeline because of the love you have for your wife. Go home and spend it wisely this time.

There was a big bang. I was enveloped by the resultant smoke and I heard some beep from a distant place. I opened my eyes and met my wife, our son and the nurse all around me- the medical equipment strapped to my hand and chest was actually beeping.. They were so happy that I was awake. I learnt I had been in a coma for three months. My son later survived and his wedding was shifted because of my condition. They were all happy to have me back. I realized that I worried for nothing and foolishly attempted taking my life- tears welled in my eyes. They did not understand my journey. They would hear my story when the time comes. I looked at my life and mumbled, “thank you for saving me”. She too did not understand.

REFLECTION
I don't know what challenge you are facing right now or what is giving you sleepless nights, but I know one day, you would realize that you worried for nothing or that you had those sleepless nights for things that do not really matter.

For more inspirational stories:
https://anekearinzeblog.com

[b][/b]

The atmosphere was tensed and her face was drawn with her shoulders hanging. There was no need for an oracle to tell that she has had it with life. She looked up, then hung her head yet again and let out a heavy sigh. Preceded by a hiss, she murmured, as if speaking to herself, "how many times will I try and for how long do I have to wait?" She kept mumbling but a bit louder this time, "All my mates are married. They all have jobs. Is it that I am not good enough, or am I so dumb to get a job?"

I knew it was fallacious, misguided and inaccurate to assume that all her mates are married and with jobs- but it was the wrong time to try to pick a hole in that. Instead, I placed a hand on her left shoulder and said, "the fact that all doors you have knocked on remained closed could be because you deserve something better. It's never your door if it doesn't open". She looked up and stared into my eyes presumably searching for clarity. With more conviction in my voice, I continued, "you should realize too that there are times the door gets opened with the last key on the ring. It tells us we just have to keep trying until the lock clicks."

Ben was right there with us. Sensing that the atmosphere in the room was approaching fever pitch, he had to cut in, "I was in Port Harcourt several years ago, trekking the length of Trans Amadi searching for a job in the oil and gas sector. I did this for 5 years until I decided to return home and take a teaching job in my village". This, to many people, seemed like a massive downgrade. Opinions were divided but more people thought I was insane." Ben rubbed his palms against each other and then paused for a while. With a somewhat suppressed smile, he went ahead, "in my sixth month in the school, I met a student whose parents approached me for extra lessons in preparation for the mid-year SSCE."

So anxious to hear more, I made a gesture towards Ben, urging him on. Smiling more evidently this time, he said, "due to the son's excellent performance in the exam, his father out of appreciation, introduced me to his brother, who was working with one of the top multinationals in the country. By virtue of this introduction, presently, I am a senior management staff in the company".

REFLECTION
When the door is not opening, we get so consumed by frustration and hopelessness that we fail to notice the opened windows. Who knows, the unopened door may be leading to an undesirable destination while our destiny lies through the window. I don't know for how long you would have been trying without success, but I am convinced you are getting closer to a better and bigger door. However, you must hang on to fulfil this breakthrough.

In Ben’s case, he did actualize his dreams of working in a multinational- even though he took an unexpected route. He revealed to me that one of his friends who refused to join him for the teaching job but kept faith with the industrial giants along Trans Amadi road is still without a job twenty years after. Some of us are presented with opportunities that fit in at certain stages of our lives but we neglect them and insist on having it our way.

Finally, I must say, "be focused to ensure that you are not pushing on the door when the actual instruction says 'pull'. And always remember the days of humble beginnings...

For more inspirational stories:
https://anekearinzeblog.com

[b][/b]

Jessica looked every inch a very successful woman. She said to me, "We met while in college. Jossy was a brilliant lad and very popular in school for the same reason. I wasn't doing so well in the sciences. I gravitated towards him to help me out especially in those subjects that involved calculations. With time, our friendship started developing into a spark that both of us could not neglect. One night, after prep, Jossy walked me to the gate of the female hostel. He walked closer to me, held me by the waist and our lips met. This was in our final year. I could remember that moment because it was my first time. I felt like a queen sitting on Jossy’s throne. I went to my bed that night and slept like a baby. We stayed in the relationship through the university and finally walked down the aisle three years after graduation."

She stroked her hair for the umpteenth time and I could notice that her nails were neatly done. She continued, "Life was sweet from thereon. I loved Jossy with all my life and I was ready to go through the storm for him. Love is a phenomenon that takes two to tango. I knew loving someone who does not return the love is like shaking the mighty Iroko tree to make the tiny dewdrops shower the ground. I wasn't sure how much love Jossy had for me but I was sure he was committed to our relationship. In my case, there was nothing else to prove. Aside from choosing to be his wife, I gave him my virginity and sacrificed being with my family to spend the rest of my life with him. I gave up my father’s name for him too. I doubt if anyone would question my love. Anyway, the babies started coming and our joy grew in leaps and bounds until Glory walked into our lives and shattered what took us over a decade to build."

As I watched Jessica dish out instructions on the phone, I was searching for the scars of yesterday without success- that was a sign that she moved on so perfectly. She continued, "Glory was the sunshine that I thought was going to illuminate my marriage but in contrast, it ended up drying away the life we had in it. After my third child, we felt we needed some help and glory became an option. She was a key member of the youth team where we worshipped and I believed my family would be safe in her hands. We met during bible classes and my first child, Emmanuela, became deeply attracted and attached to her. I would allow her to spend time with my kids while I went to work. Within one month of her coming over to help, my husband started going late for work. I would leave before him unlike before. And when I returned, I found him at home. I didn't suspect any foul play even after he suddenly applied for vacation. He said he wanted to rest when I dug further. Suddenly, I noticed he was paying more attention to Glory. He spent more time with her and showered her with gifts. The first panic came when I returned home from work one day and found Glory’s undies on our bed. When I confronted her, she said it would have dropped on the bed when she came to lay one of the kids on the bed. A few days later, I bumped into them having a steamy session when curiosity led me home earlier than usual. The sight of Glory riding Jossy like a crazy matador while he was clutching her thighs killed me a million times over while I stood there and watched."

Jessica flipped her hair and stroked it once more. In this concluding emotional part, she said, "Jossy got up quickly when he saw me; Glory frantically clutched her clothes and scampered away like a frightened rat. When I tried to confront Jossy, he beat me up and shoved me out of the door. I thought it was just a nightmare and I prayed to be shaken out of it but I was wrong. Jossy insisted that I leave with the kids even after the family members and friends intervened. I left- my life was shattered before my eyes. I had been in this relationship for decades only for it to escape me without warning. I suffered a severe heartbreak and had to be taken to a psychiatric hospital for help. When I returned home, I sat with a man of God who talked sense into me and drove it inside my head that I still had life left in me and some great kids to raise. I left my job and went into the cement business. The knowledge that I was in it all alone became the driving force. It is twenty-two years since this happened and my first daughter who graduated as a medical doctor would be getting married this weekend. My only son just graduated with first class in Statistics and has been offered a job by Google. My last child is in Russia studying medicine. I was able to do this because I completely erased what Jossy put me through and focused rather on raising my kids. I forgave him too and this way, I was able to free myself to focus on better things ahead. I learnt that Glory and Jossy later got married but she left him with their two kids and eloped with a much younger lover. It was none of my business then because I had a huge business to manage. I would have been in China to seal a new business offer if not for the coming wedding..."

REFLECTION
I have seen a lot of broken hearts. And I have suffered one before- it is the loudest quiet moment one can ever go through. The blow is silent but the impact is deafening. Love could be so strong that someone could shatter your heart and you would see yourself yearning for the same person, with the little broken pieces left in the process. But in life, I have seen instances where good things fall apart in order to create room for better things to happen to us. In between our discussion, Jessica said to me, “I had a job that was paying me a monthly stipend. When Jossy threw me out, I started a business and gave it my all since I knew I was the only one in the wrecked ship. In the end, what I lost in Jossy, I gained in a flourishing distributorship business, and well-trained children, that loved me more than anyone would ever have done. These give me the utmost fulfillment”

There is nothing that your heart cannot take even if it feels like it right now. I can assure you that nothing mends itself like a broken heart but you must give it time and belief. There is always the future ahead of a broken heart and what it shapes into is in your hands. Never try to make anyone your priority when the only thing you are to them is an option.

Anyone that was capable of breaking your heart does not deserve you. Wipe your tears and fix the future that is ahead of you. I have seen a lot of women who were thrown out of their marriages that created a future far bigger than they ever dreamt of.


For more, kindly click on the link below:
https://anekearinzeblog.com

[b][/b]

It was quite easy for me. I noticed the protruding stomach. Benjamin was really having a good life. He started this way though, “I left school some 8 years ago. There were really no jobs and I needed one very badly. When you consider the expectations placed on me, you would get the picture clearer. My father left his job so early; not because he was of retirement age but for the fact that he became terribly sick that his employer knew it was time to go. This actually put a lot of pressure on me to fill the big shoes left behind by my father. My mother was suffering from high blood pressure and severe arthritic pains. To sustain her medication, we needed lots of money. And again, the rent was there to be paid, or else we would lose the roof over our head.

Benjamin rubbed his face for the umpteenth time and continued. “That was the kind of situation I was faced with. Some of my peers were already doing ‘big things’- they lived in their own mansions and rode fast cars. This was partly because they got admission into the university before me. However, while I was trying to do it myself, they engaged the services of mercenaries to get them across the line much earlier. And again, I was not sure what they were into but I heard stories about a couple of them involved in internet fraud. A few people actually questioned the source of their riches but it was easy for them to mask whatever it was by telling people that their investment in bitcoin had yielded dividends. The digital currency as you and I know is unregulated. So, it is easier for them to convert the proceeds of their internet crime to cryptocurrency and pin their riches on it. Anyway, I did not bother myself much about what they were into. For me as at that time, there was really no hope in sight for me.”

He fiddled with the ring on the third finger and then said, “It was the norm then for people to influence their NYSC (National Youth Service Corp) State postings and places of primary assignment. For this reason, the big commercial states and big corporations and multinationals got filled up before the posting even commences. The little money that I was able to save after I left school had a lot of basic needs putting pressure on it- much less having enough to influence postings. The day of the posting finally came. On my way to the university campus, I met four of my friends who had picked up their letters. Two were posted to Lagos while the other two got Rivers State. When I picked up my posting letter, my hand was shaking as I tried to reveal the content. My heart sank when I saw it- it was a state sharing a common border with another ravaged by terrorism. It was a state that everyone was avoiding. That moment, I knew that I was going to end up teaching in a college.”

In the concluding part, he said, “I got home that day and broke the news to my parents. My father went to bed that night and never woke up. I wasn't sure but I believed he gave up hope on me. Three days later, I took the journey to the unwanted location. After three weeks of orientation, the posting to places of primary assignment happened. Alas, I found myself in a remote local government for a teaching job. I was moving from the frying pan to fire, gradually but in quick succession. Anyway, I got on with my job and gave my best despite all the distress. The one year period for the program seemed too long but in the end, I was given the opportunity to spend an extra year in the school at the expiration. I almost declined it but since I was not sure of what was waiting ahead of me, I took it. That same year, the secondary school that retained my services posted the best result in the whole state. As a reward for my contribution towards this, a wealthy worthy son of the state gave me a scholarship for my master's degree. I didn't see this coming. During my Master's degree, I met this friend whose father was a director in one of the oil servicing companies. That was the turning point- he recommended me for a vacant position. I got the job and have been with them for the past 4 years. I worried too much. My dad did too. But in the end, none of those worries moved a finger for me. I am glad and grateful to God for the journey so far.

REFLECTION
I do not know what happened to Benjamin’s father. But I was able to relate with it. I had an uncle who died worrying over how he was going to survive post-retirement. There was just one outcome; he did not even live to witness the retirement. He retired from his life before it was time to retire from his job. Worrying is a cancer that would never solve tomorrow’s fears but they would end snatching away today’s peace.

We worry as if tomorrow was promised to us. A high percentage of those things that give us sleepless nights end up not happening. Remarkably enough, we go to bed without thinking about what could happen the next day; we could actually die or live the next day, but we do it anyway.

Always remember that while we worry so much about today, it ends up becoming the yesterday and the tomorrow we all worried for.

[b][/b]

As Peace talked, I noticed a reflection of my image on the shade glasses concealing her eyes. “I met Brian in my final year at the university. There was this uncanny feeling that I had about him. But much as I tried to avoid him, he kept coming close to me. Brian was tall and handsome in a manner that an average girl would be attracted to him. I ended up succumbing to this charm. We dated for a couple of months before we graduated and migrated our romance to the streets. After we left school, he intensified the pressure on me to come over to the city where he was residing to spend a weekend. I agreed but kept rescheduling the date for the visit because of the unfavourable prevailing circumstances beyond my control. It got to a point that he confronted me and challenged me to choose between him and whatever that was stopping me from paying him a visit. This got me because by then my feelings for him had crossed my control threshold. I resolved within me that I needed to do this to prove my love for Brian.”

She paused, adjusted the frame of the shade and continued. “I made a decision and left for the city to see Brian. I got there on a Friday evening with the intention of returning by Sunday morning. He picked me up at the park and drove me to a remote part of the city where he was residing. It was actually an estate and it seemed like an environment where everyone minded his or her own business. He took me out that same night and we really had a nice time- I had so much fun. I was completely out of energy by the time we got home. Brian wanted sex that night but I pleaded with him to allow me go to sleep. He wasn't happy but he had no choice. Saturday night came so quickly. Brian wanted to have his way again but I wasn't keen about giving myself to him yet. That was the moment that everything changed. Like an angry maniac, he tried to force himself on me. I would not let him in. He picked up a sharp object and threatened to kill me. Within transient time, that monster in Brian that I always had a bad feeling about, was unveiled. He threatened to rape, kill me and dispose me in the gutter as he had done to others in the past. While I was about screaming for help, he snatched up a weapon from the bedside drawer and stabbed me in the neck. There was blood everywhere- my mouth was muffled with his powerful palm. The more I struggled, the more stabs and blows I received. I knew struggling was not going to help. Instinctively, I faked my death and stayed motionless. He stopped, and frantically carried me into his car and drove off.”

I could not see her eyes. But I saw the tears run from under the shade down her cheek. “I woke up and realized that I passed out after he dropped me into his boot like a sack. I looked around but could not tell where I was. There was no sign of life around, and everywhere was dark. I started crawling on the ground until I got to a major road. In a stroke of faith, a man that later identified himself as a military man travelling back to base after a visit to his family saw me and stopped. He saw my condition and probably, for this reason, did not ask many questions. He rushed me to the hospital. I had lost a lot of blood already. The doctor thought I was going to die; I was told that one of the doctors after observing my condition classified me a lost case. I learnt too that one female doctor was at variance with the ‘lost case’ notion and insisted they give me their best shot. I went through four surgeries that night. There was a pronounced jubilation in the hospital the day I opened my eyes for the first time in one week since after the last surgery. Propitiously, I became stable but I was told by my parents when they came to meet me after the police established contact with them that I had lost one eye. They were told too that I was never going to walk again- a series of medical examinations revealed that the remaining part of life would be spent confined to a wheelchair. I almost cried the only remaining eye that I had to stupor. Days turned to weeks and weeks to months, while I lay on my bed running an inquest on the life I had left.”

I could not bear the emotional torture she was going through. I could see that I led her down a melancholic path. She continued, “Four months later, I was discharged from the hospital. I got home and resigned to life in a wheelchair. I was filled with anger and also resentful for what Brian did to me. The fact that he was never caught worsened my condition- I needed justice and one served while the gavel was hot. By chance, I tuned in to a radio programme one Saturday morning; it was on forgiveness. And it was said by the guest that to forgive enables one to set the prisoner free; and the prisoner here is the same as the person performing the act. I learnt too that to have peace, I need to let some things go. The one that hit me more and made me cry was when one of the presenters stated that forgiveness is not meant to correct the past but to open the door to a better future. I wept at the end of the program, switched off the radio and prayed. I made an instant decision to forgive Brian; I did and then slept off. I woke up and felt a lot better. It was as if a heavy load was taken off my chest. My condition improved tremendously. One Sunday morning while everyone was off to church, I needed something badly but there was no one to help. It occurred to me that I needed to make an effort. I did but fell off the wheelchair. While trying to help myself, I was shocked to realize I could move my limbs. That was the day I had a first glimpse of the miracle that opened up a new lifeline for me. Two months later, I threw away the wheelchair and a walking stick to begin a new chapter in my life that no one ever saw coming.”

REFLECTION
When I asked Peace what kept her alive even beyond the expectations of the doctors. She smiled and said, “I have always been a warrior. I am a human fighter- better than the jet fighter.” And I could see this in her eyes. It was her physical and then spiritual strength that kept her alive. With that stab on her neck, some might have taught they had been buried but Peace believed she had been planted. And this was why she was able to fight for her life until she was able to germinate and grow. Where is your strength? What happened to hope? Where is your faith? Everything you need- hope, faith and strength inclusive- has been deposited in you. You can do all things if you can reach down within you and fetch the things that are required.

Then again, letting go expunged all the hate and anger that Peace harboured in her mind.
I realized that for the first time, she forgot she could fight. Why? She became blinded and consumed by anger that she became a prisoner of herself. Letting go opened that door of healing; a special door that reminded her that she had all she needed to fight for survival. What is that grudge that you bear? Have you thought about how it has kept you a prisoner and in chains? Your situation has been weighing you down. But you need to set yourself free first by letting go that load that has kept you from moving to a new chapter.

According to Pa Nelson Mandela, “When a deep injury is done to us, we never heal until we forgive”


For more inspirational stories:
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I love sports. Every game has plenty of lessons to take away from it. Each game takes me through a different learning curve. The extended 2019/2020 football season all over the major leagues has been concluded. In a couple of leagues where we have a game or two left, champions have been already declared. The games came in thick and fast but things have quickly receded as the season was wound down. It is now time to conclude the UEFA season for 2019/2020 as the second leg of the last 16 fixtures comes up on the 7-8 August 2020.

I have seen a lot of UEFA Champions League(UCL) finals but one left me with so much to learn that I felt the need to talk about it today. It was none other than the finals in Cardiff (Wales) on the 3rd of June 2017. It was a spectacle that befitted the hype and buzz that preceded it. I saw every minute of the game and as the dependable captain of Real Madrid, Ramos, carried the cup out of Cardiff, I sat back in my retrospective vehicle, fastened the seat belt and went down the memory lane of takeaways(from the game). Let us take this walk together;

1. DREAMS CAN BE OUTLIVED
You can live to actualize your dreams. But you can outlive them too. In an interview conducted in 2002, just after Zidane's wonderful volley had given Real Madrid their ninth European Cup in Glasgow, he said in an interview that he wished he could win the 10th, 11th and 12th UCL trophy for Madrid as well. Fast forward to the 2013-14 season, more than a decade later, he came back to actualize this dream, but this time he did it as an assistant coach- when he won the La Decima with Madrid. He would go on to complete a hat trick of the UEFA Champions League trophy with Real Madrid on his appointment as a substantive coach- he achieved this in 2015-16, 2016-17, and 2017-18 seasons.

2. YOUR PAST HAS NO BEARING ON WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR PRESENT
Juventus conceded just three goals in about twelve games en route the finals in Cardiff. It was a solid defensive record that they had going to the finals. But shockingly, they shipped in four in the finals alone. Whatever your past record, good or bad, it remains just there- in the past, and has no effect on the present. So, worry less about yesterday and focus on the present, which is a gift. Forget the sorrows and mistakes of yesterday; they have no hold on what you become today. You may not have control over your past but you can decide today how you want your life to end up.

3. THE MAXIM, 'JOIN THE WINNING TEAM' CAN'T BE MORE TRUE.
In life, joining the winning team will definitely bring success. Gareth Bale and Modric have won three UCL trophies since they left Spurs. You can imagine if they had remained with Spurs all these while. Your ability to identify and join the winning team in other life situations matters a lot. In a like manner, mind the people you hang around with. Hanging around people who do not inspire you to do bigger things is a complete waste of time. Be open to associations and blogs, like ours, that would help sensitize your thoughts and help you to achieve far more.

4. AGE IS NEVER A BARRIER TO SUCCESS, IT IS JUST A NUMBER.
Age does not guarantee success neither does experience on its own. Zidane has won UCL as a player, an assistant coach and twice as a coach while Arsene Wenger and Buffon look on. Simply put, he has won as many as Carlos Ancelloti (three) and more than Jose Mourinho, Pep Guardiola and Alex Ferguson who have won two titles each. If you are a young person, do not think you still need a lot of time to mature. Young people are doing great things all over the globe and are joining the billionaire club quicker than it has ever happened. And for the aged, it doesn't matter how you have aged. The fact that you are still alive is the evidence that your dreams are still waiting to be harnessed.

5. BELIEF IN YOUR TEAM WILL PROVIDE THE EXTRA SPARK
Your team will fight their hearts out if they are truly convinced you believe in their ability. The half time team talk from Zidane spurred Madrid in the second half where they definitely played better. Ronaldo said, "Zidane gave us a very positive half-time team talk and told us he really believed in us. It has been an incredible end to the season by us. We are the first team to win it two years in a row and I scored two goals".
Alan Shearer could not agree more when he said after the game, 'Whatever Zidane said to them at half-time worked to perfection". You have to believe in yourself even if no other person does.

6. IN A TEAM GAME, YOUR SUCCESS DOES NOT DEPEND ON YOUR ABILITY ALONE.
Defenders contribute to who keeps a clean sheet. Buffon had no protection as he would always have that night in Cardiff. Chiellini, Barzagli and Bonucci lowered the guard and Buffon's chin was found four times that night. It comes to my position that Golden Glove awards should not depend on clean sheets alone. The number of goal-bound saves a keeper makes has to be factored. Defenders should be rewarded too for clean sheets because they put their bodies and lives on the line while a keeper sleeps the whole game in certain situations. What a way for a keeper to grab a clean sheet! In summary, be modest and humble about the success you have achieved. You may not have noticed it- there are a lot of people who in one way or the other contributed to that success. Do not behave like that goalkeeper that chooses to flaunt his clean sheet record without acknowledging the effort of those like Ramos, Chiellini, Bonucci and Virgil Van Dijk that put their bodies on the line.

REFLECTION
Success has no secret. It is only those that understand the difference between sight and vision that find it. Regardless of the challenge, keep trying and never lose hope.

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Dennis can crack a rib. He is that good. But today was about his journey. “When I was in school, I thought life was easy. It was fun being in school. You wouldn't blame me because I was so myopic that I did not see beyond what was ahead. Way back in the university days, it was a lot of fun fusing academics with social activities. There were parties, there were girls and there were moments we spent time together gyrating into late nights. I still reminisce about the day we wrote the last paper. It has become an indelible event. I finished early and was walking down the corridor thinking about what the future would hold for us when three guys and a girl appeared from a sharp bend and emptied a can of ice cream and some coloured liquid on my body. That fine white shirt I wore to school that day became a work of art that died the same moment that it was created.”

He put up that stage smile once more and continued, “Anyway, this was where the fun ended. For the next 5 years, there was no job nor a sign that any was in the offing. It dawned on me that if I had to create a meaningful life, I must do something reasonable or perish as if I never walked the face of the earth. I borrowed some money and started a small business. I was pressured into selling on credit and before I knew it, the business went down faster than it took me to start it. Most of my debtors could not pay back and as a result, I could neither restock nor meet up with my recurrent expenses. I decided to go into the popular motorcycle business also known as Okada business. Unfortunately for me, I bought a locally used bike which was what I could afford at that time. It was from one problem to another- I kept pouring my earnings into fixing the bike. One fateful day, I received some beating from a guy that paid me to take him to a nearby town for a business meeting. My bike got to a ‘no man’s land’ and broke down. When there was no help in sight, my customer descended on me and almost pummelled me into a pulp. That was the day I left the motorcycle business. I sold the bike for less than it took me to buy it. The experience was like a fairytale gone wrong.”

He went on. “One day, while I was lost in thoughts, my phone rang and it was a friend from the university days on the line. After I must have downloaded a full package of my vile and pitiful experiences to him, he took me down memory lane and reminded me of those days I made them laugh their hearts off. He advised me to see how I could harness this rare gift and use it to put my dreams back on the map. I started moving from bar to bar(and to parties) to do some stand-up comedy. I made people laugh but the turn-out was not what I had expected- it was annoyingly poor. There was this valentine season that I decided to collaborate with some friends in the music industry to organize a gig. I was scheduled to perform last. But people started leaving the moment it was my turn to perform. I was utterly deflated by this action and felt like leaving the stage but something in me urged me to stay. I respected that small voice in my head and upped my game. By the time I stopped, I had only one person in the audience. The tall dark man stood up and gave me a round of applause. He gave me a business card and told me to see him the next day.”

In the final stage, Dennis said, “I could not make it as scheduled but I was able to trace his office about two days after. I was shocked when I stepped into a massive and well-furnished office to meet the same man sitting behind a table placed at the centre of the room with beautiful 25mm aluminium Venetian blinds that adorned and hugged the office windows. The man later introduced himself and it was then that it dawned on me that I was sitting before one of the most respected and successful producers in the entertainment industry. He told me that people had said a lot of good things about my performance. From our discussion, I learnt that his sole purpose of coming to the show was to watch me perform live. He offered me a contract which I signed up for the following week. Life has been good since then. We have secured some great deals and have equally organized international shows with massive success. We got good reviews everywhere we went. This was how my life changed. And I can never forget that day that just one person in the entire audience changed my life. Since then, I put up an inscription in a very conspicuous area of my room that read; “The quantity does not really matter when quality decides to be the boss”

REFLECTION
The way things appear does not always tell the correct story. Imagine if Dennis had given up at the point people started living. You might think staying was easy until it happens to you. In fact, staying was harder than whatever performance he was able to produce that day. The size of an audience matters to a performer more than it does to Trump. But we should realize that the quality of a performance is never less important than the size of the audience. One person audience could be the raving fan that you need to spread that gospel.

The same thing applies to our performance at home, in the office and other places. Don't be fooled into trying to impress everyone and end up messing up your job. Concentrate on the job at hand. Some years back, I was surprised when a senior management staff member called the branch from the head office and asked to speak with me. When I picked the line, he said to me, “You are an excellent staff. You might think those of us in the head office don't see what you do. But somehow, the quality of the jobs you do find a way of getting to us. Keep doing the good work”.

So, do not be discouraged if nobody acknowledges the work you do. You might not get a compliment; you might even be passed over during promotions. But always remember that that one person in the audience might be paying attention. It takes one moment for everything to make sense to you. The best advice in situations like this is to work on the part that is within your control, and this is all about your effort.

According to Mahatma Gandhi, “Do not let anyone walk through your mind with their dirty feet”

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I was at the premises of a commercial bank this afternoon. I was unsettled by what I saw. Let me tell you why. The common trend since the pandemic enforced lockdown is the invasion of ATM galleries by frustrated customers waiting in a long queue to have access to cash. It was a situation that gave me so much concern at the peak of the pandemic- not because of the turnaround time it took to have access to cash but for the fact that the prevailing arrangement at that time exposed people to the risk of contracting the disease. Those waiting in the queue naively sacrificed social distancing in a bid to protect their positions on the queue- they completely neglected the safety guidelines. Nobody was ready to give room for anyone to encroach into the available empty spaces between individuals in the queue. They were always packed like sardines, waiting for the virus to make dinner out of the situation.

But today, I met no single person at the ATM gallery. Instead, I saw a long queue at the bank’s entrance- they were waiting to be admitted into the banking hall in batches. The reverse has been the case since the lockdown in early March. You can understand while the situation before me appeared odd. I was lost on what to do because I was there to withdraw some cash for an emergency that came up in a remote location. The implication was that I must withdraw cash and in this circumstance, do so timely too.

Obviously worried, I walked up to the security guard to inquire why there was no queue at the ATM gallery. Anyone that has been at a gallery in recent time would understand my concern. It just didn't add up. But, I insisted on finding the reason for the sudden change in habit. The guard confirmed my worst fears- he told me with no empathy that there was no cash in the machines. This information was not what I was expecting. I needed cash and I wanted it quickly because of the emergency. I almost walked over to the queue but hesitantly, I walked over to the gallery and slotted my card into the ATM. My brain has been so stressed that I was struggling to remember my PIN. The first two attempts were wrong and I knew where a wrong third would lead to. Despite the consequences, I went ahead. I punched in the PIN and pressed the enter key. When I was done entering the amount to withdraw from my account, my heart started pounding; because I knew that my card would be swallowed if I got the PIN wrong in a third consecutive failed attempt. Amazingly, the machine started a purring sound. I smiled when I heard that familiar sound- the machine was picking the notes. My smile did not stop my worrying because I knew that my journey would not be complete until the notes were dispensed and found its way into my palms. Oh Yes! The machine spat out the notes complete and in good condition.

While I was confirming the dispensed cash, one of the customers in the queue sighted me and screamed. There was a rush as everyone made a dash for the gallery. I was smiling, with my attention on the surprised guard, while I left. Having settled this, I adjusted my focus to the next in line; the emergency. This way, I was happy that I was making progress.

REFLECTION
My little son has asked me once, “Daddy, how many times are we meant to try before we give up?”. I laughed and told him that we are expected to try as many times as our lifetime can accommodate. In order words, we have to keep trying until we are gone. Isn't it fascinating that it took Edison 999 failed attempts to discover the light bulb? That number was not within the average a normal human would have submitted to, in the search of a purpose. Succinctly put, you have only failed when you stop trying.

And again, it is our decision that matters most in life. When that little voice speaks to you and encourages you to try, do your best to make an effort. If I had listened to the guard, I would have ended up in the queue and probably wait till ‘who knows when’. You have to trust your gut feelings during crunch times. They can either save you in times of danger or help you reach your highest point of glory. And if I had believed what I saw, as regards those in the queue at the bank entrance, my decision would have been informed by that thinking too. So, what we see does not always depict the true situation of things around us.

Lastly, for the guard, he responded to me based on the information he had. He truly believed the ATM was down. He acted ignorantly and I blame it on the poor communication mechanism between the atm custodian and himself- though, this is not our focus here. It goes to show that the advice you receive at times, might come from a loved one who is doing so from an area of ignorance. The implication is that you should process the advice; do not take every information that comes to you on face-value.

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Wasn't it said by James Hardly Chase that fear is the key to unlocking the wallet of the rich? Fear is a psychological weapon against progress and the free mind. Our fear is basically not of the unknown but of what we believe about the unknown. The brave man is not he who does not experience fear, but he who conquers that fear and uses it as a ladder to ascend to a height unimaginable.

"I allowed the fear of what could happen, to destroy my life", said Pa Alfred. He scooped a pint of ground tobacco with his thumb like a shovel through sand and dumped it into one of his nostrils. With tears running down his eyes owing to the effect of the tobacco, he continued, " I will never forget the effect my boss's words had on me each time he reminded me I could lose my job if I don't perform beyond expectation".

He cleared his throat and said, "The fear of losing my job consumed me and became the denominator of everything I did. It set a cloud of limitations over me and I became someone else. I wasted my youthful years with an employer that had no plans for my future. I ended up being used.” Fear of losing one's job is cancer that devours the mindset of an average employee. The employers know this. The supervisors know this. Their supervisors or superiors know too. It is a weapon used with the intent to keep the employee's eyes on the mark but it ends up hitting the panic button in the employee's brain and it triggers the psychological bullying that follows.

Never allow the fear of losing a job keep you rolling on the bed all night. Embrace faith and make a pillow out of it. Come to think of it, losing a job creates a domino effect of vacancies. It opens up a space for someone else, which opens up that person's job for another, and so on. In other words, when you lose your job, that same job would be out there looking for someone. There is a job out there waiting for you, but you have to go get it. Finding this job is not exclusively about working for someone. It could be about living a dream that could eventually create jobs for other people.

REFLECTION
The truth is that some people need to be forced through a door for them to be caressed by the soothing arms of the morning sun- their mindset contains them within a space until they get a nudge or a shove. Paul Pogba was forced out of Manchester United in 2012 after being promoted to the senior team by Sir Alex Ferguson the previous year. The club believed he was not good enough to don the red jersey of the Red Devils. He didn't whine. He didn't fight. He never cursed nor traded blows. In response, he went to another club waiting for him and ended up adding so much value to himself that Man United that let him go for almost nothing, bought him back from Juventus, the same club they sold him to about four years ago, for £89m in the 2016/2017 season. If your employers say you are not good enough, it is their opinion. Do not whine! Walk away with pride and step out of the door with a bounce in your steps. Tuck away the experiences and knowledge your employer blessed you with and go find that job or calling, waiting for you.

Fear is an enemy. Do not let it rule your life. Losing your job may be the only door you need to waltz through to Eldorado. Don't destroy yourself like Pa Alfred who sat all day stuffing his brain with tobacco. Be a Pogba, that lost a job that opened the door for something bigger. By the way, Pogba’s net worth is about £85million and he is currently on a weekly wage of £290,000. He has an endorsement with Adidas valued at £31million. That is the strength of the brand Pogba has become. You too can be one, if you do not let that fear take you hostage.

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“One thing that captivated me as a kid, to a great extent, was video playbacks. Whenever I followed some sporting events on Tv or saw movies on VCR or DVD, seeing them in playback created an ecstatic feeling. However, there was one thing I hated playing back in my head; my life in the past 10 years. I always knew life was not going to be easy for me especially after my father lost his job in my penultimate year in college. For this reason, I was compelled to start off early on my own trying to earn a livelihood. Outrightly, I left secondary school and picked up a job at a barbing salon. It wasn't what I wanted but it gave me the opportunity to leave home every morning and return in the evening- it gave me purpose. Our financial situation got so bad that the landlord threatened to throw us out after our rent was delayed by 3 months. At this juncture, I knew with no iota of ambivalence that I needed something that would offer me more. I left the salon job and took another job in a bakery. The margin was not that much between the previous and current salaries. But at least I could take home some loaves thrice in a week as incentive. There was this day that I was at the bank to carry out some business transactions on behalf of my employer when a teller mentioned to me that the bank needed a driver. I applied and got the job.”

I sat at one end of the table in a spacious office looking at Damian. The handsome lively man at the other end did not depict the troubled times he had told me he went through. "He is a survivor indeed", I thought. He continued, “You see, I did three jobs in three years but my financial status was neither here nor there. It saddened me whenever I returned home and met my family in a helpless situation. We lived like a flat broke family. Two years into my driving job, I was involved in a road accident but fortunately, no life was lost. But the car was badly damaged. I got sacked- not because of the accident but for the fact that I took the car away without proper permission. I was at a crossroad at this point; to choose between life and death. I did not want to die but the life that I was living was less than a low life. For four good years, I was at home waiting impatiently to get back on the street. One day, I realized that I had been whiling away time that I would have put into productive use. I was so bitter and consumed by my situation that I forgot that I learnt how to bake while deputizing for someone at the bakery. I borrowed some money and started baking some pies, cakes and rolls. I thought the business was cruising on autopilot until I woke up one morning and realized I had lost 40% of my capital- that is, the borrowed money. It was so surreal as I watched my ship hit a financial iceberg.”

Damian paused briefly to respond to the manager who needed an issue sorted out urgently. He continued thereafter, “There was a day I woke up very early in the morning to look back at my journey. Much as I dreaded doing so, I had no option- it was playback time. I was mad with the outcome of my peek into the past. My peers were far ahead in all indices of life while I kept gasping for financial freedom like a feisty baby strapped on the mother’s back like a bundle of cash. My family background and my father losing his job were not within the ambit of my control. But all the efforts that I had made to have a successful life had been in sixes and sevens. Nothing seemed to be working. It seemed that the harder I tried, the more success departed from me. I began to believe I was good for nothing and that the gods must be certainly angry with me. You know that feeling of emptiness that takes your soul hostage, especially when you feel all the odds were stacked against you. I tried as much as possible to stop the pain from drowning me. Consequently, I hit the street again seeking for answers. My sorrow was trying to devour my soul but I was defiant and ready to go down in history as the man who went down trying to save his soul.”

In conclusion, he said, “I met a poor widow who just lost her husband. She had a bakery and wanted someone to manage it for the family. There was no sign of life in what I saw but I took up the challenge and opted to run the bakery with a meagre capital. It was then that I realized that all the hard times I had been through happened in order to prepare me for the present test. My first missionary journey at the bakery gave me a direct baking experience, while the second journey taught me money management. I squandered the borrowed capital but I learnt my lessons. The driving job at the bank and the job at the salon taught me humility, patience and how to manage difficult customers. A few more years down the line, the widow and her two kids won the American visa lottery. Out of her magnanimity and a way of rewarding me for believing in her, she passed the bakery to me as a gift. With some further borrowing, the bakery, which was solely mine, became one of the best in my state of operation. Presently, we distribute to neighbouring cities and states with over fifteen delivery vans and 40 staff. There is an existing approval to expand our daily capacity to about 10,000 loaves. My bakery was nominated for an international baking competition just last year and we ended up in the top 10 list of those that graced the event.”


REFLECTION
If there is one quality everyone needs to learn, it is staying positive even when our lives seem to be disintegrating. Damian fought and conquered his bad days. Remarkable enough, it was the experiences garnered from those bad days that opened the chapter to the good days in his life. Adversity did not only make him a better person but it also made him a better baker. I had a taste of one of his loaves. You would go back for more if you did- because of the taste and quality.

Adversity is the best teacher around. All the times Damian was struggling in those jobs, he was being prepared for the bigger moment of his life. Those tough times exposed him to experiences that became relevant to the success he achieved in managing and running the bakery. According to an anonymous, “The greatest achievement on earth is never in never falling down but to rise each time you fall”. I have seen a couple of boxing bouts where someone that got knocked down in a fight ended up winning through technical knockout( or by points). Whatever you are going through right now is to prepare you for the glory days ahead. It seems tough now but when the sun shines on you, you will better acclimatize to the small shadow cast behind you because you have spent a lot of time with the dark patches of life.

So, pick up that mallet and smash you way through!

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"I am looking for a buyer. I have a sewing machine to sell", she said. I was concerned and wanted to know why she made this choice. She smiled, took two more steps towards me, and explained, "I have always loved sewing as a kid. My late parents gave me a sewing machine as a parting gift on my wedding day in order to keep this love alive."
She heaved a sigh of relief and continued, "I never put it to use because the babies started coming and my husband became sick some years into our marriage. These all took a toll on me. Now, I am a 60-year-old widow that has no use for the machine. It is time to say goodbye." I felt the passion in her voice and saw how her eyes lit up whenever she talked about sewing. I equally discerned the dejection and despair in her voice that she might never realize her dreams.
I ushered her to a chair and while maintaining good and steady eye contact I said, "I feel your pains but I won't be a party to selling the sewing machine. Our dreams prevail as long as we stay alive and keep doing the right things. Your husband is gone but you can fall in love all over again. You loved sewing before you met him and therein lies your solace now. Dust that machine and fall in love all over. Age is nothing but a number when it comes to chasing our dreams."

REFLECTION
Now, to everyone on this blog, let me say this. At the age of 90, Priscilla Sitienei, a great grandmother and former midwife in Kenya, walked into her first primary school class. Roger Federer won his 19th grand slam at 35. At an advanced age of 68, Physicist Sir William Crookes invented the first instruments in the study of radioactivity. Janet Jackson, the last female of the famous Jackson's family had her first child at 50. Who says you can't live your dreams at old age?
Bill Gates built a business empire at a young age but Colonel Sanders was 66 when he built the Kentucky Fried Chicken empire. At 92, Marjorie Liggins married her 86-year-old dancing partner Norman Camm. In fashion, Coco Chanel ruled at 85. Mary Wesley wrote 10 bestsellers including The Camomile Lawn after she was 70. Dame Judi Dench, starred in her first movie and became synonymous with the James Bond movie after 50.
You are only as old as you remember. You have dreamed for too long; it is time to wake up! Stop singing in the shower! Stop dancing in the room!! Stop feeding the talent and the million-dollar ideas in your head with procrastination and limitations!!! Walk out of that mirror of age limitation, take a few steps back and appraise yourself. It is time to make a change of direction if you don't like what you see. Success has no barrier or limitation with age. You still have time to bring that childhood dream to life.
By the way, the aged widow didn't sell the machine. She went for 6 months of training and became a fashion designer. She later became a proud owner of three shops, 12 employees and over 20 trainees. This is how to fall in love again at old age when others would have given up on life.
Incidentally, people will always tell you how being at the twilight of your life makes it physically and perhaps mentally incapable to chase your dreams. Yes, I know at 50, both Messi and CR7, may no longer be relevant in the scheme of things when it comes to the beautiful game of football. But I say to those people, every creation is preceded by a design. The purpose of everything created is integrated into this design that births the finished article that we behold. If it is in you, you have all it takes to go for it because you came here with a factory-fitted purpose. So, GO FOR IT WITH EVERYTHING YOU HAVE GOT!
Lastly, at old age, you can choose to be miserable or you can choose to motivate yourself. Age and time will always be winners. The only person that can lose is YOU.

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Sheila appeared like a goddess in her white flowing gown as she approached me for a handshake. When we settled down, after exchanging some pleasantries, she started to tell her story. “My wedding day would continue to stand out as the best moment of my life. I had tried to pick better ones in the past but that moment that I walked down the aisle waiting impatiently for the moment Tunde would slide that ring down my finger, and then hear him profess to spend the rest of his life with me (...for better, for worse,...in sickness and in health…), stood way ahead of the pack. Tunde and I met in college and it was an instant match made in heaven. In our final year in college, we made a mistake that resulted from our youthful exuberance and a passion that was mutual. Those were feelings we could not contain. A rush of blood to the head and one moment of pleasure got me pregnant. That reckless attitude would have ruined our future if not for the option that we resorted to- it was hard but we finally settled for an abortion. It was a quick fix but one that returned to haunt me.”

She dabbed her eyes for the umpteenth time to conceal the tears welling up in her eyes and then continued. “Tunde and I had lived together for 10 years after that dance down the aisle without any sign of conceiving a baby. I was down on my knees praying fervently to God to change my situation. It got so unbearable that I modified my prayer point from blessing me with a baby to conferring on me a proof of womanhood. I granted God the permission to bless me with pregnancy but take the baby before it was born just to enable me to prove to my detractors that I was, after all, a woman.”

At this point, I snapped my fingers by rubbing the thumb against the middle finger in defiance. But Sheila interjected, “Please No! Don't do that. Doing it would amount to disregard for what I went through. I wouldn't wish them on anyone, my enemy inclusive. All the joy and good moments that I had prior to this situation were wiped away in a twinkle. There was this Mothering Sunday that my husband's little nephew got a gift for me. I was so happy only to hear him crying a few minutes after he had left. I stepped outside to meet my husband’s elder sister flogging him. She was asking the little boy if he did not know that the day was meant for real mothers- not for a ‘man that assumed mother status’ because a fellow man put a ring on her finger. That day, I felt as if God should descend and take my life. I cried uncontrollably all through that day. My husband was away”

With both eyes evidently swollen this time, she continued, “There was this Christmas period too that a wealthy man in our town extended some palliatives to mothers in my community. My mother-in-law was having a discussion on the subject with a friend. The moment she saw me approaching, she said to her friend the moment that I was within earshot, that the palliative was for real mothers and not for men that label themselves as mothers because they have a man’s name tag. My legs almost gave way that afternoon. I managed to return to my flat on both legs before collapsing on the floor, sobbing like an orphan. So, you should not blame me for praying to God for a test of womanhood. Who would go through what I went through and choose not to do the same?!”

At this point, there were tears flowing down her cheeks like butter flowing down a hot surface. I passed a tissue to her because her napkin was soaked with tears at that point. She concluded her story, “Where did I not go? I was bathed naked in a small river by another man, a so-called man of God, rubbing his filthy hands all over my body. When he started soliciting for sex, with no evident result, I ran with my two legs on my head. I had to drink my own urine, the very first one of the day, for one week all in a bid to be counted among my fellow mothers. I do feel ashamed today whenever I remember that I stooped so low. My late mother was not there to console me. The one that would have taken her place, my mother-in-law, turned my life into a nightmare. It was during service one Sunday morning that I listened to a life-changing sermon. And, it was as if the man of God spoke directly to me. The theme of the sermon was on God’s time and the essence of allowing Him to play a key role in our lives. That day I went home and flipped a switch in my head- to stop worrying irrespective of whatever people said or did about my condition. I realized that it was neither in their hands nor mine to do anything about it. Two months after that epic sermon, I took in. I was scared to tell even my husband until the end of the first trimester. He thought I was sick until I broke the news. Today, I am the mother of two lovely boys and a beautiful girl. The pregnancies happened within 5 years because we couldn't wait. We were having them back to back. If the sun could shine on my sorrow to illuminate the dark moments, there is no way it wouldn't shine on others. As long as it is not medically impossible, they should remain calm and continue to try and hope”

REFLECTION
When you set your eyes against the sun, it does just one thing; cast the dark shadows behind you. Adversity can drag us through rough edges but we must never stop hoping. The manufacturer’s designs and specifications precede every finished product. Therefore, for the fact that you were created a woman has given you certain privileges. They might not come easy but you must trust on who created you with that female status. An ovary and a womb would be useless on a man. The fact that you were born with those is a big statement that you have certain privileges by default. Just trust in the judgement of the maker.

And the moment you choose hope over anything else, everything is made possible in your life. Always remember too that what people say has no bearing on what happens in our lives. We must remain strong and exhibit a firm character when our faith is tested. Sheila waited for more than 10 years, some for far more and some for less. The common denominator is that they all did it. The time to carry your own child is ticking. Wait for that time.

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[b][/b]
Timothy’s line had been buzzing since I stepped in. He took advantage of a little break and said, “My father was a technocrat. He was one of the early ones amongst his peers that obtained formal education in my town. It was easier for him because his father, my grandfather, worked in the Nigeria Railway Corporation. It was a privilege that my father accepted wholeheartedly. He did not mess around with the privilege in the sense that his elder brother chose a different path- he went for trading at an early age. Being a trailblazer influenced my dad into choosing the same path for all of us; his children. I have five siblings- two of us went for the law profession while the other three went for medicine. My father had a huge influence on my settling for the law profession. As the first child and first son, he wanted someone to take over his law firm when he retires. It was a law firm that he had run successfully over decades of hard work. The luxury life we all had was made possible by the stellar years it took him to build this law chamber from scratch. When people addressed him as ‘SAN’, short for Senior Advocate of Nigeria, I always sensed that feeling of fulfillment and pride, from his body language. I wondered one day, while in my final year as a law student if I would ever achieve what he had done. It was a massive shoe, staring in my face, to be filled.”

I did not envy Timothy. My ears would have blown up considering the time he spent on the phone taking calls. He continued, “At the death of my father, managing the law firm became my responsibility. I had practiced for some years but with each passing day, it became obvious that I was in the wrong place. The firm was doing well but for me, it lacked that spark(fire) that was needed for a fulfilling life. Waking up in the morning became a nightmare because I was not looking forward to visiting the firm or even appearing in court. I began to feel that my father used me. He pigeonholed me into what he wanted me to become and pushed the lock. But after his death, the lock started pulling apart. He was no longer there to sustain that tether-hold he had on me. One day, I woke up very early, at 4 a.m to be precise, and arrived at the conclusion that the imaginary tether my father had on me needed to be broken. I wanted out of that pigeon hole- my prison. That same week, I summoned a board meeting and broke the news- that I was leaving the law firm and the profession. I handed over the reins to my younger brother and left.”

He concluded a discussion on the phone, dropped it on the table and went on. “One Sunday afternoon, that was a week after I left the law firm, I went to see a childhood friend that was a successful businessman. When we got talking, with focus on my issue, he reminded me that I had always loved buying and selling. He reminded me too that we were planning to leave at the same time for an apprenticeship before I was shipped out to one of the unity schools to commence the first year of my primary education. I got home that day and realized that something in me had been rekindled. I had found a lost desire left behind in the garden of Eden after it was vacated by the original occupants. I had to go get it- and immediately. I signed up the next day to understudy one of the big players in the building material sector. I was to undergo a one-year tutelage with them. At my age and with my career experience in law, people close to me, including my wife, thought that I was stupid. I thought so too but the only difference was that I was convinced my stupidity was leading me somewhere good.”

He concluded our discussion this time. “One year looked huge but it came quite fast. With the little money that I had, I set up my own shop. The beginning was tough. There were days we made little or no sales- not just a few days but many days happened without sales. But I didn’t give up. Things got worse- putting food on the table became a big challenge. It got to a point that I couldn’t pay school fees for my kids. I realized my mistake and shot down the business with no hesitation. It gave people the opportunity to laugh at me. I was called names but I refused to allow it to break me. I took stock of what led to my shutdown. I realized my mistakes and worked with the lessons therein. This time, I spent another one year as an apprentice in another line of business. I graduated and started mine. We have been in this business for one full decade. I am one of the biggest players in the business; the distribution of a fast-moving consumer good. From the proceeds of the business, we were able to set up seven petrol stations in different locations and we went into the production and distribution of table water. I went back to join the board of my late father’s law firm but only in a bid to run it well; they made a mess of the firm after I left. I went through a rocky journey to get my life where it should be but I am glad it all made sense at the end.”


REFLECTION

There is nothing that you are going through that no one on the surface of the earth has not overcome. Stories and evidence in history abound of great overcomers of different shades of adversity. If you stay hard enough and refuse to quit, your name would be written among those conquerors of time past.

The fear of failure makes it impossible for us to pursue our dreams. It took Timothy a rocky path but he never allowed the fear of failure or the unknown to deter him from making that quest for a fulfilled life. How many people would leave a noble profession and a ready-made law firm to chase a dream with a lot of uncertainties, as he did? Passion is that powerful emotion that drives us in life. It is a force that keeps two things cohabiting even in the face of challenges- just like love does. How could you survive a career or job without loving it?

Yes, times are hard. And I can understand that a bird in hand is worth more than a million in the bush. It is normal to feel like you have to keep what you have got. But, living the rest of your life hating the job you do is one way of dying slowly. Like it happened with Timothy, the path might be difficult but once your heart finally gets you to the promised land, everything would definitely make sense.

For more inspirational stories:
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[b][/b]

Samuel is about the most sincere storyteller I have met in recent times. His account of events was sincere. “I was raised by an impecunious father. We lived under continuous years of penury. That was the kind of life that I was raised into- a pedestrian life with neither dreams nor purpose. As I became older, I heard stories about my grandfather and his father, my great grandfather. They did not help my father's case and mine even by the smallest margin. My grandfather mortgaged all the family plots of land to fund his drinking life. He was known as a dipsomaniac even in far away neighbouring communities. There was a story about my grandfather being beaten up collectively by women in our community because of the life he subjected my grandmother to. That was the height of the humiliations he had to be put through in the community for being an addicted alcoholic. He became synonymous with failure. Parents in that era were reported to have always rebuked their wards using him as an example of a failure. They always admonished them saying, ‘Do not end up like Maduka, the drunk’

Samuel was clear about his mission; to tell it the way it is. “This was the nature of the inheritance that he left behind for my father. The liability was too much for him to settle that he took solace in alcohol too. The situation became the tales of two Madukas of separate generations bound by the same fate. My father became entangled in the fight that he came to disengage. He was not as lucky as his father- the alcohol got to his liver. He used the lands that he recovered after settling debts owed by his father, to incur further debt in order to fund his treatment. He left us with a bigger liability at death. ‘All eyes on me’ in my case was not that of Tupac Shakur blasting through the speakers- instead, it was the strength of the expectations placed on me. But honestly, no one, I repeat, no one gave me the chance of ever becoming somebody. I did not equally give myself any chance because I did not see any reason why I should be better than the two key men that arrived before me.”

He continued, “I have experienced many life-changing events in my life but one stood out. There was a day nightfall came upon my community in the day time- a woman slapped a red cap chief in the village square over a small disagreement. It was a taboo in my culture to assault a chief. In fact, any woman that would commit such taboo would wish she was never born. But in this very case, nothing happened. It was later muffled around that the woman was a supreme court judge. It was an event that changed my life because prior to that, I did not know that anything could give a woman that quantum of power or control over any man- much more a red cap chief. The following week, I left town to understudy a wealthy trader from a neighbouring community. There were lots of challenges on my path but I had resolved never to end up like the two men that preceded me. After seven years of meritorious service, my boss released me to start on my own. I was off the block like Usain Bolt and by a stroke of luck, made a flying progress.”

As he approached the end of the story, Samuel said, “Most evenings, after the close of business, we would gather at a small joint to have some goodies and booze to wash it down. I decided to convert this time to something more productive because I knew I needed to do something different. I needed that power that the female judge had. I registered for adult education and started at Basic one. It was tough but within one month, I wasn't relying on my sales boys to issue invoices any longer. It gave me some springs in my step- and it motivated me. I kept going and by the grace of God, I obtained my first master’s degree, MSc in Business Administration, within a couple of years. My desire is to be the first PhD holder in my kindred. I was motivated by the desire to cleanse the mediocrity of my predecessors up to our tenth generation. I was ready to wipe out that poverty that found its way into our home.”

Samuel’s phone rang. He picked it up and after speaking with the person at the other end, he smiled and said to me, “It has been confirmed. His excellency has just made me SSA(Special Senior Adviser) on economic matters. I don't know where to begin. But I give all the glory to God”

REFLECTION
You see, the choices we make are very consequential to what we become at the end of the day (I agree with this submission hook, line and sinker). But I give more credit and put more credence to the reasons behind the decisions we take. The reasons that inform the decisions are like those behind the camera in a movie set; the film crews. People are familiar with ascribing the credit for a good movie to the cast but they forget that a good cast performance is subject to the quality of the crew. Reasons are the drivers of the choices and decisions we make. They are no less important on how our lives pan out. If you want to make good decisions, you have to find the perfect reasons.

The two men in Paul’s life followed a certain destiny. But Paul, who did not want to end up the same way, had to do things differently. And boy, he did just that! If you want a better life, you have to do things differently if you do not want to be tied to the same result. There are pathways surrounding us. They lead to different destinies. Therefore, the doors we walk through or slam shut in our lives determine what destiny we end up with. You must choose wisely to have a better life.

We may not have a perfect life but we have the power to improve the one we have. Whatever it is that you are going through now can be overcome. But first, you must decide to do things differently. It might sound difficult but the moment you find enough reasons to do something about your situation, the decisions would happen spontaneously. It is in your hands!

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[b][/b]

The Don as he was fondly called started like this. “I was the regional manager in one of the multinationals in the Fast-Moving Consumer Goods space. I was reporting straight to head office and for this reason, I felt like a demigod, and in my thinking, I believed no one could touch me. I was brash in my decisions and I issued queries with little or no provocation. I noticed people scampering for safety whenever I approached the office and the feeling tasted like blood in my mouth whenever this happened. It gave me that confidence that I was truly in charge. I hated it when people stood up to me. I have influenced exits and suspensions without salary for those who tried to stand toe to toe with me even when it was obvious they were on the right lane.”

With a sad look on his face, he continued, “Be that as it may, there is this member of staff that I can't forget my experience with him in a hurry; my driver. I put this young man through hell. I made him report to my house earlier than what was stipulated in the company’s policy. He would come to my house on weekends to help my wife in running some domestic chores and buying things in the market for the family. I would keep him late some weekends and compel him to sleep in the gatehouse with the gateman. Honestly, I didn't see anything wrong with this at that time. Because I was raised by a father who was power-drunk and a no-nonsense person. He taught me how to seize power completely and how to subdue your direct report or subordinates and have them on their knees in total submission. And I was happy it was going on perfectly. I was the perfect example of a chip off the old block.”

He took a sip from the glass cup. The Don loved Henessy. “But one day everything changed. I went on a romp with one of my female acquaintances. We had some fun and stayed out late. My phone rang at around 11.30 pm. It was my wife trying to find out where I was and what was keeping me behind. I remember telling her that I was in the office carrying out some reconciliations. I became uncomfortable at that moment. I discharged my female acquaintance around 12 midnight and left with the driver. As we were approaching a popular roundabout in the city, there was this flashlight coming from a distance. My heart skipped but after a quick conversation with my driver, we kept going. Right before us were four heavily armed fierce looking guys. At that instant, one of them bellowed, “stop and put your fucking hands up.” I heard the screeching of tyres behind us. I believed the car coming from behind would have seen what was before us and quickly manoeuvred his escape. My driver whispered to me, “Oga, I am sorry” and stepped on the accelerator simultaneously. He knocked over the guy standing right in front of us. There were gunshots from those beyond and the commotion caused by the bullet and the screams from my driver and I left us in a state of stupor.”

I sensed the tightened grip on the glass cup as he concluded, “We got to the checkpoint in front and stopped. The policemen on duty took off at sighting us. I won't blame them because we approached them like a rabbit that shot out of a hole searching for safety. They later reassembled and returned when we stepped out of the car with our hands clasped behind our heads. My driver was bleeding profusely. Some bullets caught him but we couldn't tell where. At the hospital, it was discovered that the bullet glazed through his ribs and one through his stomach. He needed a quick surgery. He came out of surgery but we learnt the bullet punctured an essential organ. The doctor told us that he had a 50-50 survival rate. When he woke up, the police were there to talk to him. He knew where we were but he collaborated on my story that we were in the office. He said the same thing to my wife and his new wife of five months. He had a golden opportunity to finish me but he didn't. He later told me when the police left, “I can never give you away boss despite everything”. He died the next day. I had never cried for the dead the way I cried for Christopher. I was broken. That moment changed my life and changed it for good. The employees noticed that I had changed. There were secret talks in the office about it but they couldn't place a finger on why.”

REFLECTION
Our time on earth is transient if you consider how many years the world would have existed and how many generations of people would have lived through it. If it is within your power to make life less stressful for those around you, do your best to make that happen. The driver showed kindness and compassion even when he knew he was going to die. That would have offered some men the opportunity to have the last laugh but he chose to cover his boss to death. It really costs nothing to treat others with respect but on the flip side, you will earn so much in return when you do so.

And lastly, people’s feelings could mean a whole lot to them. As a boss, even if those feelings mean nothing to you, remember it could mean a lot to others involved with you. People around us are struggling and fighting from different fronts without our knowing it. The least we could do is not adding to the burden. We should not take other people’s feelings for granted.

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[b][/b]

A couple of years back, I was driving from my city of residence to another major city in a faraway state. The journey was to take me about four hours (on average) driving through the federal highway. Before I set out, I made sure my vehicle was in the right shape. I hit the road and was cruising towards my location. Aside from the bumpy part of the road, I was having a stress free journey until I noticed something that caused me some distress.

I looked at the dashboard and noticed a warning indicator blinking on my fuel gauge; my fuel had gone into the reserve. And I could not see a fuel station in sight. I knew the reserve could take me through another 20 miles but that calmness I had all these while sublimed into thin air. I began to pay serious attention to everything I did; I switched off the air conditioner, I slowed my breaking acceleration to conserve fuel. Within a few minutes, I lost all the composure and calm I had about my trip. I knew what I had in my reserve could take me some distance before I ran completely out of fuel but for the fact that I did not know how close the next fuel station was, it got on my nerves. I had to park my vehicle to avoid the engine sucking in some air that could result in damages that could cost me more money. Memories of people packing their vehicles and running out with a gallon in hand in search of the closest fuel station flashed through my mind. The difference this time was that I found myself in a location that was highly dreaded because of the recent activities of hoodlums within the vicinity. I knew right away that I had goofed; I did not pay attention to the volume of fuel in my tank vis-a-vis the distance I was to take that day.

My day switched from good to worse in a twinkle; this is just how life is.

REFLECTION
Do not run your life until you are left with just little in your human reserve. Just like the situation I got myself into with my car, I have seen people live their lives with neither a plan nor a purpose. They simply go rudderless and continue to live as the spirit leads them until one day, they flash a look at their version of the fuel gauge and realize they have gone into 'reserve mode'. Much like I scaled down the volume of activities to conserve consumption, you see people reset to a mediocre way of living to accommodate whatever value they have left in their life’s tank. They switch off the air conditioner of their lives, slow down on activities that could bring them more wealth (due to paucity of funds) and are forced into reducing their standard of living all in a bid to accommodate the resources at hand.

No matter how much you make, you will definitely run into trouble if you do not save a part of it. What you save (and then invest) determines how much you store in your reserve. Your reserve should have in it at least your basic monthly expense for six months. You must keep an eye on it. Do not run out of fuel in the middle of nowhere.

Keep your eyes on the dashboard of life!

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[b][/b]

Bobby and I were brought together by fate. It was in a quest to pursue a professional course towards the advancement of our careers. He told me this story while we were waiting for the facilitator to arrive. I remember him saying, "I was still under probation when it happened. My confirmation was three months away. It was in my third month since joining the bank. At the close of business every day, every bulk teller had to balance the cash collected for the day before moving to the vault whatever is left unused. I was taught to balance intermittently to make the final reconciliation easier. It was on my penultimate balancing for the day that I noticed a difference in my figures. A negative difference of N30,000($65) stuck out like a sore thumb. Those days, in that spirit of oneness, every teller gathers to help narrow the findings when issues like this occur. The person involved is not always in the right state of mind- which is why external help from colleagues is very much advised. During a similar process, it was discovered that I mixed two different denominations of the currency in a bundle and vaulted it in as the value for the lower currency. The cash was traced to a front teller who had used the money to pay a customer. The customer did not return with the difference and was never traced."



Bobby flashed a look at his wristwatch. I had expected him to complain about the waiting time but he went on. "Normally such shortages were meant to be booked and absorbed by the bank if declared officially but this option was rarely used because of the query that follows and how it could mess up a teller's record. Our supervisor was blowing hot with so much anger. In the end, after my peers and I would have besieged him with pleadings and with tears all over my face, I was advised to make up the money by Monday morning, the next working day. I was just three months into the job. I had not received a dime as a salary due to documentation issues with my employer and my bank. Sadly enough, my monthly salary as a contract teller then was a mere N26,000($56)- by implication, the missing money was more than my monthly salary! I was downcast and in great despair. I got home that day and went straight to bed. I chose the bed as a source of comfort that would put me to sleep. But this day, sleep became murdered in cold blood, right on my bed.”

He emptied the content of his water bottle in his mouth and continued. “I was rolling on the bed, from one side to another, replaying the events that exposed me to the prevailing condition. The more I did, the angrier I became. While I was engrossed in my thoughts, my phone rang. It was Steve, a driver with one of the commercial banks. He informed me that my curriculum vitae(CV) was picked by him at his sister's house and was submitted a few weeks back at the bank where he was working- this bank happened to be recruiting at that point. My uncle, whom I submitted my CV to, was the husband of Steve's sister. I had appealed to my uncle to help me submit the CV whenever he comes across any opportunity. But by a stroke of luck, Steve found it and performed the rarest act of benevolence that got me shortlisted for the aptitude test. I left very early for the neighbouring town to write the test. I did well and over a period of three months, I was taken after going through a successful interview and medical. I went wild with joy when I got to the remuneration page in the offer letter. It had jumped from the peanut that I was earning as contract staff to N1.5 million($3,260) per annum.”

He concluded his story as someone announced to the class that the facilitator just drove into the training venue. “All these happened within three months of recording that shortage at work. I don't want to bore you with how I ended up raising money for a liability that was more than my monthly take home. I accepted the new offer and put in my resignation letter. I left them with good memories and I kept in touch with all my former colleagues after I left. Till today, I still see that cash shortage experience as the catalyst that pushed me through that door of opportunity opened by Steve. Due to the nature of the teller job, cash shortages will happen within a person’s lifetime as a teller. It is just a matter of how many times against whether it will happen. The fact that a little experience created a liability bigger than my monthly take-home was an eye-opener that I needed a job that would offer more. I saw the risk and the need to create a mitigant became a necessity at that point. You can see why that opportunity became a ‘make or mar situation’ for me. That incident made me angry about my situation. And that was a classical life-changing moment. It got me to where I am today. But honestly, I am still hungry for more. And, it is that hunger that I found that day that drives me till date.”

REFLECTION
What about your situation? Have you found that anger and hunger creating moments? To embrace something new, you have to come to the decision that you have had enough of that existing situation. Most people become so familiar with their situation that it becomes a comfort zone. They begin to believe that no other situation exists outside the current one. Even when they do believe there are better situations out there, the comfort the current situation offers them becomes the proverbial tether of comfort that binds them to the existing destiny. You need to find that moment that changes everything because it might be the catalyst that would spur you into a pathway that would offer you a better living.

We all detest difficult roads but they carry the tendency of leading us to beautiful places.

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[b][/b]

I have never seen anyone in the game this big. There is no better way to depict Nigeria as the giant of Africa than to have him lead the African giant into the football pitch in an international game. He is for sure a massive lad. He is 1.85m and weighs 102kg.

This 38-year-old Anglo-Nigerian, Adebayo Akinfenwa, plays as a striker for Wycombe in the English League One. His side just got promoted to the English Championship after goals from Anthony Stewart and Joe Jacobson helped them beat Oxford United at Wembley in Monday’s League One play-off final. This earned them a promotion to England’s second tier for the first time in their 133 year history. In the 2019-20 EFL season, he banged in 10 goals in 20 appearances to become the club’s top goalscorer.

Don't they say that heaven is filled with answers for our prayers but unfortunately we do not ask for them? One of the ways we can create opportunities for ourselves is by asking. While celebrating his team's stellar performance, Akinfenwa who was so elated screamed to the microphone that he would want Liverpool’s boss, Jurgen Klopp, to come to celebrate with him. During his post-match interview with the Sky Sports crew, he yelled into the microphone;

"Look, look, let me calm down. First and foremost, I want to thank God, because today he made the impossible possible." "Four years ago I stood in front of you and I was technically unemployed."
"Let me tell you something, the only person that can hit me up on WhatsApp this time is Klopp, so we can celebrate together. You get me? Oi!"

Much later, Klopp, the Red’s gaffer, took to the Whatsapp social media video platform to answer to Akinfenwa’s wish. And the German said;

"Hello big man, congratulations!"
"Watched the game, well I didn't see the post-match interviews but Hendo [Jordan Henderson] or one of my players told me that you want to get, what did you think to say? If you could get in contact with me on WhatsApp, here we go!"
"Congratulations. I'm pretty sure your whole life at least a Championship player and now finally, you are there. Well done." "Great, great victory. Even in strange times, I hope you celebrate appropriately."

REFLECTION
We should not be afraid to speak up ourselves. The word we speak is a powerful force and it can go a long way in making things happen for us. When we want something, we should be courageous enough to ask for it- be it in the office, at home or in relationships. It is like in the game of football where if you don't shoot, you may never score.

The remarkable thing about Akinfenwa was that Klopp was not even watching. It was his captain, Jordan Henderson, that heard the wish and then passed it to his boss. Akinfenwa did not only get to celebrate with Klopp on video, but the gaffer also ended up inviting him to the Red’s trophy parade. He is sure living his dreams as a die-hard Liverpool fan. Just by speaking up, he got more than he wished.

He will surely not walk alone on the trophy parade day!

It does appear that we simply do not pray enough at times. If Klopp could listen to his captain to fulfill the request of someone he has no relationship with, you can imagine what God can do for us if we ask hard enough.

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Reference: www.goal.com