Ile-Ife:
I fly. #Wingwheeldrive

[quote author=nkem Kalu]..........And she arose. Henceforth, there shall be national holidays to celebrate the death and RESSURECTION OF DAME PATIENCE JONATHAN. SHE HAS EQUALLED THE RECORD OF OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST OR EVEN SURPASSED HIM FOR RISING AFTER 7 DAYS FROM DEATH. .....CONGRATULATIONS TO NIGERIANS.......ANOTHER SAVIOUR IS BORN.[/quote]



;∂

lily_tender: This is a big lie. I remember that Reuben Abati and other presidential aides said Patience was on holiday and resting in Germany and Nigerians should pray for her to rest well.

Na to pray begin pray make she rip.

Nairalanders I need your opinions on this.
I have a friend who goes to his gf's house and spend the night there while she is still living under her parent. He does this at free will I wonder if the girls parent aren't aware of this or they just being ignorant of it..is it a right thing to do or it is wrong cos I ve tried to talk him out of it but sees no big deal in it..

redsun: You hot to grab it,nobody is going to give it to you on a platter. Kill off and put away all the useless and destructive rotten eggs like obj,David mark and co and establish precedents where rationality and sanity rules.

Power belongs to rational people,not to subcreatures that rules the roost in Nigeria today

True!! But who's gonna kill those subcreatures if they(subcreatures) keep ruling?

n 1979, Bamanga Tukur was the Governor of the defunct Gongola State (now Adamawa & Taraba) and 33 years after he is today the Chairman of the ruling Party, The PDP; Dr. Bello Halliru was commissioner in the Old Sokoto State (now Sokoto, Kebbi & Zamfara) and 33 years after he is today Minister of Defence; Major General David Mark (rtd) was the military governor of Niger State in 1984 and 28 years
after he is today the Senate President; Gov. Murtala Nyako was the governor of Niger State in 1976 and 36 years after he is today the Governor of Adamawa State; Ogbonnaya Onu was governor of Abia State in 1992 and 20 years after he is today the National Chairman of ANPP; Gov. David Jonah Jang was the governor of Benue State in 1985 and 27 years after he is today the governor of plateau state; and Martins Elechi the Ebonyi State Governor is over 80 years old! Only in Nigeria is this possible, where the youth of today have no hope into the future! Where do we go from here?
People Deceive People (PDP), 1985, IBB was the president of Nigeria and our teachers told us that Buhari was the former Head of state..Our teacher also called us the leaders of tomorrow..27 years later, IBB and Buhari are still contesting for President..Its either our teacher lied to us about being the leaders of tomorrow..Or tomorrow is yet to come..
Who's fooling who?. Let's stand A̶̲̥̅̊₪d̶̲̥̅̊ fight for our right cos we ar d leaders of Today...
Pls let all youth alliance together and fight for the unborn.

This is a quest for creating topic.. Coming to feed us with lies. Utter rubbish

If this thread is anything to go by. I ask y is unilag's main gate pix been shown Ąπ∂ Πδτ̲̅ ∂ student

Na only Arinze be the only black man for Africa?? Same thing that was said before the outgoing pope was elected or voted for..

Wetin go come happen to me wey never see my admission letter for face??

Rhino.5dm:
Bros, I hate PDP with all I have, but this isn't about playing politics with what other people revered. There is a big difference between politics and making mockery of what people hold as thing of worship.

what I want to know here is, even if he merely retweeted @Zeebook's tweet, can he do same for any joke about Mohamed? The answer is CAPITAL NO!!!. A respected leader should know the difference between politics and emotion, particularly in a volatile country like Nigeria.

It is a height of stuupidity for El-rufai to have overlooked the multiplier effects of his mindless joke and go below the belts to LWKMD this tweet.



If me and you follow go aso rock come dey eat with jona and me come quietly talk say " This is the clueless one" and you way hear me come talk am loud " This is the clueless one!" and come laugh join am, who you think say the sss go catch? me way talk am small or you way shout am loud and even put laugh join am?

;∂ ;∂

Rooneyboy: I can't see Jesus o , does it mean u guys are more righteous than I am or something ?

My thought exactly... I couldn't see a thing.

warrikid: Forget that matter joor,Yam wey won Burn go burn,weda u boil am,roast am or fry am. #shikena

May God bless u̶̲̥̅̊ for this..

Well it depends on how we ended d relationship sha....

acidtalk: Almost ALL my Ex (except the married ones) still come to me for assistance and I still do it without hesitation.

No one ever comes to me for assistance and leave the way they came. Even if I can't do all, I will certainly do my best.

Most of them wished we could come back together but mama warned me never to accept back my old and thrown away toy. If I was generous to give the toy to charity, then I should never take it back.

Nice one jare

Okija_juju: [b]Imagine say a 'Hurricane Abimbola' is heading for Ekiti State in 3 weeks.. First and foremost;

1. Prophet T.B Joshua will prohesy the hurricane.

2. Ekiti State Governor will hold a press conference advicing the people of the state to remain calm as government is working hard to see how they can tackle the situation.

3. National Emergency Management Agency (NEMA) will grant an interview on Channels TV and AIT saying that they are well trained and prepared to handle the crisis. That they are untop of the Situation.

4. The Federal Government will wait for the Hurricane to first land and wipe out Ekiti State then;

- Hold a day of National Mourning and Prayers and order the flag be flown at half mast.

- Visit the disaster location for a first hand assessment of the damage.

- Visit the survivors camp and share relief material (Mosquito nets, rice and
Indomie)

- Set up a committee to investigate the Hurricane and see how we can prevent future hurricanes from visiting Nigeria.

- Release billions of Naira (on Paper) for disaster management.

- Sack the Minister of Water Resources for failing to contain the water.

- Commend the State Governor, NEMA, Red Cross and other emergency services unit for their quick response.

5. The Senate willl hold an emergency session and condemn the 'Hurricane'.

6. Churches around Nigeria will hold crusades and Programmes with Titles like 'May Hurricane wipe out your enemies'.. 'Calming the Hurricenes in your life'.. 'Finding the Rainbow in your Hurricane'.. e.t.c..

7. M.I Abaga will release a single about hurricanes.

8. Femi Falana (SAN) will sue the Hurricane, F.G and Ekiti State government for their poor handling of the Hurricane.

9. A thread will be launched on NAIRALAND and be put on the frontpage and will hit over 20 pages in its first 6 hours.

10. CPC, ACN, APGA and others will blame the PDP and Jonathan for the Hurricane.

11. Jokes about BOKO HARAM claims responsibility for the Hurricane will go viral on Facebook, Blackberry Messenger and Twitter..

12. Many People will change their Blackberry Display Pictures to 'Hurricane Pictures' and their status will read.. #Hurricane Things..





_{All this and the people wey the hurricane actually affect go just siddon dey suffer..} [/b]

Well said.

El Guapo: A woman was having sex with her lover in her apartment, 20 floors high. Suddenly she heard her husband arrive, She told her lover, stay like a statue and Don't move.

Husband: Who is this?

Wife: This is a robot I bought to have sex with when u're traveling.

Husband: Ok, let's have sex now!

Wife: No sweetheart, yesterday I got my period. So I will go & make a cup of coffee for u.

After she left the husband said 'Damn it I'm so Hot, I will f*ck this robot! He tried f*cking. The lover started talking in a metallic robotic way: 'SYSTEM ERROR! WRONG HOLE! SYSTEM ERROR! WRONG HOLE'.

Husband: Damn it! Robot is not working properly. I'm throwing it out of the window. The lover realized that he was on the 20th floor so he said:'SOFTWARE UPDATED' PLEASE TRY AGAIN!'

Oh boy I be olodo I no even fit answer one question.. Choi!!!

Gbyte: What you people dont understand is that when you are good you dont compete with people, they compete with you and while they do that you sit wherever you are laughing at them and doing what you know how to do best and the good thing is that you do those things with ease and you still beat those competing with you hands-down.

I trust Apple not to do an advert back because of Samsung, you know why? Apple is not threathened with the plastic you people call phone. Given an iPhone 4 and your new Galaxy SIII any time any day I'd choose my iPhone, you know why ? Because when you have an iPhone you dont ever need any thing to worry about cos the phone would keep your company; depending on how you can manipulate the phone to do what you want though, now thats what I call a personal assistant
lol

U̶̲̥̅̊ said it all.

Product of copy Ąπ∂ paste. when does women start paying bill. Whenever they go on date

swtchicgurl:

smh! it's your ancestors i pity!

blocker: I was in Lagos back then. That was 3 months after N.Y.S.C and was seriously job hunting, when I came back to my brothers place I was watching OBJ who appeared before Oputa Panel that day. The 911 thing took that soap opera (Oputa Panel) off the front burner for the duration of the programme.This was on a Tuesday I believe.

U̶̲̥̅̊ too much

I was at home playing football wen ♏♈ aunt called dat we should tune to CNN to see hατ's happening...
CNN was d no1 news station back den

born2fuck: Nothing will make me change my phone, after calling and receiving,browsing etc pinging for bb, can its solve hunger problem?

All them oyinbo life na to dey find wey to collect money from africans, them build different moto so tay begin give dem honda bulldog,end of discussion, small time you go hear honda lion and honda human being, wetin dis phone wan do again, una go dey deceive people with bodu

We nigerians gave those cars names

U̶̲̥̅̊ pay N300mil for just gala nite. Re yju not giving room gor more stealing. Yet u̶̲̥̅̊ say nigeria is poor.

I haven't though, but I hope be just to know.