The girls age is really a big disadvantage.plus I f**ked up big time

After God fear women. Some can be so heartless

Sorry I didn't update sooner.
The issue got a new twist, my fault and set up from the minor's family. All I'm trying to do now is to avoid a law suit.

Tritri:
@Deafndumb How do you access the baby...Dont go and act childish by saying you want to do DNA for the child then the parent will systematically disorganise everything..Just scope the girl you're expecting some money. and you want her and you to go out shopping and have nice time..Get a car or taxi for easy access. Dont forget girls has there own conn way too.At the end it is who won..She either won by confusing you not to.Or you win by confusing/deceiving her..My Point is at the end it is RESULT that matters.


That was my previous msg.

Thanks a lot. I'll try get info about any lab around me

nameoh:

Dont know how it is done in the hospital u are going to.
Over here in the uk , they just use something like a cotton bud to swipe inside the 2 chicks of the individuals involved..
while playing with ur child u can do it, with nobody knowing.

Hmm

It can be done also, but I guess I will have to pay more for the swab kit

Tritri:
@Deafndumb You must be a Dundi for telling her mom.Play this game and get the result.They are playing games..Play ur game..Handle it yourself without anyone involving. Why should the mom or the grand mother know about ur plan of DNA so fast?

Tell the grand mom to stop interfering into your affair.Or Change ur SIM for a while.Which kind man u be? Inshot are u within 21-24yr?
Hope you're aware that you will go through this process with ur GF too Financial wise?

Okay I'll try get it done secretly. You know the issue had been controversial all along so that option had been on the table all along

I think I just have to act irresponsible for a while as I can't raise 100k for the DNA purpose anytime soon.

I currently choked with responsibilities.

What if I discover the boy isn't mine after footing the bill for the test. Do I just loose that particular fund or I should just ignore the family entirely.

Please not I am still hustling and trust me 100k right now ain't a joke

I have a pregnant lady living with me whom I need to care for, coupled with her upcoming delivery and post delivery expenses.

Tritri:
@Deafndumb How do you access the baby...Dont go and act childish by saying you want to do DNA for the child then the parent will systematically disorganise everything..Just scope the girl you're expecting some money. and you want her and you to go out shopping and have nice time..Get a car or taxi for easy access. Dont forget girls has there own conn way too.At the end it is who won..She either won by confusing you not to.Or you win by confusing/deceiving her..My Point is at the end it is RESULT that matters.

I guess the DNA won't be a problem, accessing the child won't be too difficult as the mother of the girl would definitely accept. But I don't think she will ever allow the girl go out with me for now let alone the baby without she going with us.

My fear now is she said something about me manipulating the test results so as to deny the baby, that she must be physically present at the lab.

Why would she think I would go through all this just to manipulate the result just to avoid taking the responsibilities I had already shouldered since January?

Mind you they are financially buoyant and can influence the test results if she knows the particular lab to be used

Artistree:

Please source for funds, do the DNA test and settle this issue once and for all. I have a feeling the family knows you're not the owner of the child hence the girl sent you that whatsapp chat and you blew the whole thing our of proportion with your spontaneous reaction. Now, they will be more than careful with respect to you and the child and since the mother has asked you not to ever visit them again, how do you gain access to the baby?

Exactly my thoughts
I guess I should have stayed completely clear off this issue.

Artistree:

I've been following your thread and believe me, you have been outrageously annoying! Please get this over and done with already...

Hmm, don't know what to say

Thanks a lot for all the contributions. I will opt for the test.

I keep u updated as soon as I get it done. Once again thanks a lot

I have the name of the other guy and some pix. Most of them are treated pix. But myself and the guy share some physical properties.

It has just complicated my stand, plus she didn't give me the boy's name, I kept searching fbk until I found one that looked like the one I peeped at on her whatsapp contact.

I sent her those pix and she confirmed it's the boy.

Thanks a lot for sharing ur personal experience. It has really helped me. I will consider my options. I guess they are of the believe that I am a maga

I guess I just have to ignore them completely for now. If the baby is mine she will bring him. That's my current decision

The girl is from Benin

Tritri:
[b][/b]


Let me tell you how to figure out the truth, Get the ex guy'z Facebook from her or watzapp .Start comparing the face of the baby to those guyz she f/u/c.k around with ... Baby of 3mth shud start displaying little figures of the Father.

All you will get at the end of THIS from the GIRL is AM SORRY IT THE DEVIL'S WORK, SHE PUT IT ALL ON YOU because SHE IS SCARED OF HER PARENT.


Meanwhile you should have not told the parent about the watzap text.
You should av handled it your way with her .
Her parent her teaching her all this just because nobody is ready to take the
RESPONSIBILITY .

Is the girl from OGUN state?

I guess you are right. I feel regret for getting this involved. And right now I think I will just forget her.

I tried asking her about the other potential father's Facebook info she flared up and got angry abt the whole issue.

I think I just have to forget completely about this issue. I don't think I'll snap out of it if the boy isn't mine.

I don't want to waste my money on a test just to prove that the boy is another's and all I will get is I'm sorry just like you rightly said.

I guess at this juncture I have a better conscience now

Ishilove:

You have another pregnant girlfriend?

Dude, are you competing with 2face?

I'm not competing at all o. Na me just shook my head for this situation

Ishilove:

You could google... or ask your local doctor.

Try, so that you can have peace of mind

Thanks

kaziblake:
@Deafanddumb na wa o...what of your other pregnant girlfriend?

She is still pregnant

VikingsOO7:
Your next comment/update on this thread should be the result of the DNA.
Any other thing will just be a waste of Seun's nairaland data bandwidth .

Thanks. I hope to raise the amount soon, though I have no idea yet, I just heard people say it's quite expensive

Ishilove:
Deafndumb, your story is plenty. Perform a. DNA test in a clinic where the officials can't be compromised and move on with your life.

I sincerely don't know any. I'll appreciate suggestions

TV01:
@anxious"n"confused

Have a DNA test performed as soon as is feasibly possible. The longer this uncertainty persists the more damaging the fallout will be if the child is not yours.

You don't appear to be able to handle this in the calm manner that is required. Involve the right elders in your family. Anything else at this point is just story. Everything is up in the air until you know for sure either way. DNA test now!


TV

Thanks alot

I'll go inquire about the cost of the DNA testing. Or do u have an idea

On getting to her house today, her mother challenged me as to why I hadn't visited for some days, I told her what daughter texted me. To my surprise she started to justify her daughter's action.

I told her that her daughter made an expensive joke and that there is no problem but all I need to do is clear the doubts.

I then told her (the minor's mum) about the family rites. Just like I had anticipated, she refused vehemently.

In short, she started playing the victim. Turned the issue into a hot argument and eventually blamed me for impregnating two women.

The girl's father was at home today when the issue began, he was later invited to the discuss. Initially he chastised his daughter for such an expensive joke and issued a Stern warning to his daughter never to joke with that issue. Suddenly he changed his opinion after his wife told him that the girl said so because I wasnt catering for her needs fully.

Finally she told me never to come visit again in the presence of the husband and the husband didn't alter a word.

Here I am at home confused on what to do

Some minutes after the calls stopped, my whatsapp began buzzing again. I kept reading the messages, she was like it was a joke, she was teasing me. I sincerely became happy. I felt relieved. I think I had began to like the boy. Yet again another thought of the other potential father struck through my mind. I bacame unhappy again plus confused. I decided not to reply her messages because I had sent two messages I was already in feeling regret about.

We later chatted when I my head became cool, she said it was a joke and that she was sorry. I was like it was an expensive one as you know what was on ground before

I told her I needed to clear doubt about the boy and told her I must perform my family rites on the boy.

I told her that if I am not the biological father of the boy and the rites are done, it's results would be devastating.

She was reluctant to accept and gave me an infinite time as to when we would do it.

Seconds after I arrived home, I picked up my phone, rang her elder brother, asked of his current location, he answered; bros I dey house. I replied immediately, tell your sister make she enter whatsapp sharparly.

After some minutes, staring at the most recent series of messages I had sent to her, expecting the second mark and then the change in color of the marks, I picked up my phone the second time, this time around I had lost a part of my patience, couldn't mask the anger in my voice, hooked up her brother and was like shey you never give her my message ni. The brother replied saying she talk say her mb (data bandwidth) don finish. I immediately dropped the call.

Confused, I never knew human brain could be faster that the fastest computer, I processed all series of events with the last 11 months, my ALU (arithmetic logic unit) became overloaded, data began to overflow and I began to get series of errors, from syntax error etc. I couldn't make a decision, as I wanted peace at all cost. I didn't want to act immaturely. I chatted with her brother for a while then logged off.

Immediately I logged off, her mum Called me about 5times, I didn't pick up, later the girl started calling. I refused to answer as I was like confused. I don't want to say the wrong things cos my head was still spinning, that I had been foolish. I kept blaming myself for being weak, for letting myself get used, so I decided not to talk to anyone until my head settled

After one of my visits this week, on Wednesday to be precise as I do visit at least 4 times weekly, something funny and confusing happened.

I had recently left her place after we had discussed about how to get her back on track with her life, I just received some set of messages on whatsapp.

She was like she had a confession to make regard the paternity of the boy, plus I would get mad at her, that I will forever hate her. Immediately I saw the messages, I picked up my phone to ask what she was trying to say, but she went offline immediately. I swiftly dialed her number, as my head was hot and my heart was racing really fast, the phone began to ring, she didn't answer her call. I tried the number the second time within split seconds after the first try, but to my surprise her phone was switched off.

Pissed and confused I left where I was hurriedly, dashing to her house, after some minutes I was about 400 meters away from her house. Unfortunately, I couldn't continue my journey to her house because I was having mixed feelings, confused, angered, anxious, I then decided to turn back, headed for home immediately.

Now to the main reason I remembered to come visit this thread

Thanks a lot for your advice and contributions so far. It has really helped

The situation of things now is that the minor had put to bed.

The mother and child are doing fine, she put to bed in mid July. Thankful to God, it was a safe and quick delivery, no complications.

We returned home from the clinic with smiles, everyone was happy, different reasons though, as I was obviously grateful to God for making the delivery safe and not because I had become a father as I wasn't sure he is mine.

Little did I know I wouldn't get my answers immediately. I had thought immediately the baby arrives, I would have my answer.

I was disappointed to see just an innocent, handsome looking baby boy, he looked perfectly like a baby.

Please note: I had never seen the other potential father physically. Just a brief peep at his profile pix on what's app. (on the minor's phone


I had to christen the boy as I was the only one to do so, the other potential father didn't show up. The ceremony was brief and tensed as both families were not cool with each other, no physical issues, but the emotional and verbal trauma was just too terrible.

I was surprised when I the pastor christening the boy removed some of the names I had intended to give the boy, the pastor though a stranger to my family and but known to the minor's family decided to remove some names. The ceremony had to take place at the minor's place because my family wanted to play safe.

Tritri:
@Deafndumb good to hear ur doing fine.First of all. going there all alone isn't even fair.U should av gone with an elder.
and it seems ur financially buoyant , Cox if u dont av d cash am sure u wouldn't mention ur conscience . Finally concentrate on ur GF and at list try to build a family now and that minor will treat u diffrently and u can focus on ur future which is mostly important..But if u decide to play along with both it might distract u from been focus and also any cash u make for 1-3yrs might be spent on taken care of each of them.If i were U and i av a job.I would get married to my GF. then my wife and kid will be my priority ,I might even take d child from the minor and train them and av peace for life.That better dan...abuse from minor..next day requesting for money...then GF same again...then ur life becomes nuisance # No savings.

Thanks a lot man. It's not easy o, I have to pend m gf's expenditure sometimes to cater for the minors, although the minors parents also have been taking care of their daughter

The major challenge right now is when ever I visit the minor, her mum keeps asking me questions which would prompt me to remind her that the child is possibly not mine. This creates issues a lot. Even when I try to avoid the question, she will pester until I respond.

She curses me a lot, despite me trying to support her child Tru. I thought it would be easy to care for a couple of month but its very difficult. I wish I could just ignore the girl along side her family, my conscience won't just let me rest. Even when I am conscious of the fact that the child may not be mine, I feel it's just a consequence for bedding her that I have to pay even if after everything and the child isn't mine. At least I would sleep peacefully knowing that I have done everything I could for her.

On more than two occasions I have been walked out of their house


Right now should I continue visiting her or I should just ignore her? And should I proceed with my marriage rites with my gf or not?

capnies:
you can perform the DNA test now don't wait just walk into any teaching hospital near u keep your mouth shot goodluck

I didn't know about the teaching hospital dna stuff before now, I would have done that secretly but right now things are really complicated as my access to the girl had been drastically reduced because I tried to clarify the issue of other potential fathers coupled with my other baby mamas issue

Tritri:
@Deafndumb Just wanna ask u.Did anyone come up or did u hear new story about the young girl which u felt a different way right now and you which u never took the step of accepting to be responsible for her preg at that period? because am sure new stories would come up and u might regret accepting the preg at first...let me know ur Opinion .

Yeah, a lot had happened, I have not been online because reality (expenses) had set in. I have to put all my time into making some extra cash

The minors parent wants to kill me with request, though I told them I can't afford it, her mum especially, really wants me to foot all the bills but I refuse some on the grounds that the child is possibly not mine, which in turn results to heated arguments before cooling things off.

My regret for now is telling the minors parent of my gf's state(being pregnant), it really messed up things,

My gf's parents r really pushing for marriage, but I dont want to have that yet because I feel it will only aggravate issues.

I didnt disclose to my gf's parent of the other potential child because I learnt it was a bad idea from the first I disclosed to.