aboyaji:
Hello Nairalanders!

I'd like to write on the surprise birthday I got from the people (my girlfriend and her sister) that love me dearly.


On the 2nd of July, I got a call from my engineer friend who lives in my former place of residence. He had informed me in the morning of a real estate deal ( I am into real estate too). He stressed that he visited my new place the penultimate day which was on the first of July and he'd like me to come over to his place in the evening for more information. I replied in the affirmative and dropped the call.

Fast forward to the evening, I came back then dropped off at a friend's shop who sells footwears by 4 through 6pm. Shortly after, my girlfriend and her sister strolled passed the vicinity where I was. They told me they were on their way home to prepare rice and that this time there's little funds and high cost of food stuffs in the market that the rice would be a red oil rice and they were inviting me over for a RED OIL RICE BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION in their home. I smiled and bade them bye.

That was when I remembered my business meeting with my engineer friend. I strolled to his place in a long sleeve shirt and shorts with bathroom flipflops.

Arrive this friend's apartment, we talked over the deal with inclusion of another friend of his before he asked me to follow him to SOMEWHERE.

I told them that my birthday was that same day and I wasn't celebrating anything. He laughed at me and his girlfriend chased me down with pure water.

I came back and wore my flipflops and offer we left for the SOMEWHERE. We strolled through some streets and gardens and towards Dunamis Church. I thought we were going to pray since he wasn't precise about the place we were headed. Suddenly, we passed the church. In all the walkabouts, we were engaged in serious unending gists. From Nigeria problems to Donald Trump wahala and all before we found ourselves inside a hotel.

He asked me to wait for him that he was looking for someone and in my mind, that should be the client for the real estate business. He checked and came back and suggested we had a seat for a while and wait.

We patiently waited and had our phones charged. I wrote some stories while we waited and he read it and shared his insights too. Then I saw my girlfriend walk past us and into somewhere I didn't know. I became uneasy. Shortly, I rose and confirmed what my eyes saw but met her sister there too. A little while, his own fiancé came and met us and sat patiently too.

Then I told my friend that I saw my girlfriend in this hotel and said maybe they came to see a family friend. But on a normal, she would tell where and who was taking them out beforehand. But this time, NOTHING OF SUCH.

My friend said maybe she has explanation to make later. Maybe, it came as emergency and no airtime. I said Yes, it could be the fact.

8:00pm my friend received a call and asked for us to go home that the person wasn't coming anymore. I unplugged my phone and off we made out. Then, he said he'd like to check something around the pool side in the hotel. I followed him....


Immediately I advanced into the arena... There was a chorused scream and shout of HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

Guys, my head literally BURST into bits. All the friends I have were in attendance. All... Men and female alike.

So, he knew all along... Something I never envisaged... Something I hadn't experienced... Something I least expected from my girlfriend and her sister because they are barely managing their low income.

This is so beautiful and refreshing to read. From you as an easy going man, to your girlfriend that goes above and beyond to give you a special treat, to her sister who is positively supporting your relationship, to your friends who came through.

I’m sure you already know it but you have a very good support system. I pray that God blesses you all and that you all live a happy life in love and prosperity.

Happy birthday bro!

Fiscus105:


If u re not leaving a frustrated life, you won't give foolish advise, since u re in such situation?

You refused to ans question I asked u

And 2nd questn, will u approve ur brother or son fiancee to visit exes cos of loneliness ?

It’s living and not leaving, you ignorant presumptuous dummy.

I didn’t see any such question when I quoted you. But since you asked, I do not have the right to approve the terms of my brother or son or daughter’s relationship as long as it’s not criminal. Their rules of engagement is really none of my business. It’s left for them to set the tone of their relationship and figure out what works for them. Boundaries...dummy.

Now dummy, If you had asked if I’d permit my fiancé to make visits to his ex out of boredom, I’d probably say yes and no depending on various factors. Yes if it’s an ex that they’ve both come to terms with their relationship being platonic and have been good friends for years. And no, if she has shown signs of or expressed that she still likes him. It’s not even something that will come up for discourse because he’s aware enough to avoid that situation. I’m grateful I’m not surrounded by damaged men without self control like yourself. You know, people like you who have been poorly conditioned to view every relationship with the opposite sex as an avenue to scratch their smelly itch. Be better for the sake of your health.

It’s almost 8am. I’ve got to take my morning walk. I’m done trying to light up your brain.

Fiscus105:


Inform her fiance that she bored and it's her ex that can wipe out her boredom?

Aunty you are old but reason like kid clown.

You ask urself out of hundreds of females in neighbourhood it's only ex that she can visit to whirl away time?

I’m probably younger than you so keep the kid in there. It’s not my fault that all the female figures that have shaped your life were easy lays for any man who snapped their fingers. Your painful life experiences shouldn’t be projected on others.

Yoighaman:


Really? But your comment doesn't make you pass as someone who stays in Nigeria....or perhaps, you are oblivious of what is rife in the Nigerian society....the more reason why you see so many comments which are in tandem, the many, many, many bad girls have given the very, very, very few good ones a bad tag...

The Nigeria I know there are lots of good girls, desperate girls even that are ready to tattoo “taken” on their foreheads or commit murder to get wifed.

For a man pushing forty, I found it sad that he was ready to call off his engagement because she visited her ex. If you are ready to marry a man or woman, you should have some faith in their character and such things shouldn’t be grounds to break up UNLESS you confirm something sinister did take place.

I simply feel the could have expressed his displeasure with the visit and she could have apologized and noted it as part of the things that trigger him. I honestly feel this story is made up and will not be acknowledging it anymore. It’s too unrealistic.

chinchum:


You seem to be projecting your level of "morality" on the average person, which is the first fallacy in your submission. To help you understand your submission, i will use an analogy, if you pick up a misplaced phone on the floor, what are the chances you will return the phone back the owner, now reverse that if you misplace your phone what are the odds the phone will be retrieved. If you will be honest with yourself at least 8 out of 10 times if you misplace your phone in an environment like Nigeria, it is gone for good.

When someone is naive /gullible, it may signify immaturity.

If a lady ready to marry goes to have a hangout in an ex house, the chances that they were entangled in sexual affair is high. you know this if you will be truthful to yourself. It is only fair that most peoples comment will mirror the scenario with the highest possibility.

I don’t need “inverted commas” to expressly state that I find your comment as a projection of your insecurities, immorality and mental perversion. We are a bit too grown for that fakeness. Stop it.

Your phone analogy is highly flawed. The chances of your phone returning to you are dependent on a number of factors i.e., location, personality etc. Also, an illustration of phone theft is not best suited to describe a situation such as this.

Who is this someone that is naive or gullible? Come now chimchum, be a confident adult and directly express your shade. Your attempted disrespect is laughable.

If I may ask, what is the basis for your assumption of a high sexual encounter? Your personal experience and that of your loved ones, family and friends? Or the opinion of some anonymous degenerates who are known to often express their fantasies of hate through trigger threads created specifically for that purpose? That’s...concerning. I do hope you all use protection. HPV is a nasty nasty thing. Hepatitis B too.

Speaking from experience, personal and shared, an ex is most often just an ex. Self control, fidelity and discipline in relationships is a virtue most women I know and have met have. This is our truth and if your life experiences have brought you to disagree, accept my deepest sympathies. It’s above me now.

Carchoice:


It’s obvious you don’t know why most of the comments are from males and why they are against the lady’s action. Most of these male commenters are the “exes” the story is talking about.

I hope you get the point now?

Lol. I still don’t oh. A few anonymous commenters who may not even be up to the legal drinking age are not enough to be the standard to judge the thoughts and actions of everyone. Lots of people hide under anonymity to do and say the most. Catch them outside and they’re probably the opposite of what they represent here.

HajiaNotu:

Thank you for this piece.You took it straight out of my mind..Like if you cant trust your partner to some extent, theres really no point thinking of marriage...Moreover, the lady must have told the guy herself...people just give theirselves migrane where theres no issue at all.

You’re welcome Hajia. I’m inclined to believe this story is manufactured because it’s just ridiculous! Extreme reaction to a very straightforward issue. However the comments I’m reading are shocking and sad. I don’t want to believe the average Nigerian reasons this way. Let me just hold my circle tight if this is what outside looks like. Lol.

PlanktonX:


If only you know what the devil has in stock for that guy...at that stage of relationship, a lady is still visiting an Ex.

Every Ex has the power to bind and loose. This is not about a matter of forgiveness but lack of adherence to the principle that guide relationship.

It's like getting born again in the morning and visiting an old Olosho friend in the evening because you are bored.

Flee from all appearance of evil... not evil here, but simply an appearance.

I’m sorry but I don’t quite agree with some things you’ve said. The ex was definitely not an appearance of evil to her so she went there. Was it indiscretional, definitely! But is it enough to end a relationship when there was no confirmation of cheating? No!

The power to bind and lose lies with God first, then your own self. That is why we are individually responsible for our salvation.

An ex is an ex in my dictionary. True, there are one or two I will never be caught with alone, not because of how I feel but because I know they still have a soft spot for me. While there is one I’m still friends with today because we realized this romance thing wasn’t working for us and we ended it and became friends. Life is what you make of it.

I’m not excusing that it was improper to go to his house but you shouldn’t assume there was a sinister reason or intention behind it. Not every relationship between a man and woman, at that age for that matter, must be sexual.

He could simply have let her know exes are a huge no for him and they can move forward peacefully with that. Unless there is a threat to my life and loved ones, I can’t destroy my number I’ve used for over 10 years just because of distrust. That was him taking it too far.

I believe they’re too old for this level of immaturity displayed. If they truly love and respect each other, they can mend this with a honest conversation, get married and build a honest life together. They’re too old to make this an issue. A simple “I don’t like you visiting your ex because it’s a trigger for me” from him and her simply apologizing and reassuring him of her fidelity would have ended this matter. It irritates me to see grown men and women act like teenagers.

Yoighaman:


Please permit me to ask you a question: In which country do you reside?

Obodo Nigeria.

Maturity is truly not by age.

This is what happens when there is no real trust or love between a couple. How can grown man and woman have an engagement cancelled because of a visit to her ex boyfriend? Has she shown you signs of being a cheat or are you judging her by the true state of your own heart. Her phone number she’s had probably for years you want her to change it? Why? So she can lose friendships and business opportunities because you are insecure? Has it occurred to you that her stubborn stance may have been due to anger from your distrust and unfounded suspicion?

The worst that should have happened was that you express to her that you are not comfortable with her hanging out with her ex boyfriend in such a private setting and promise not repeat the actions since it makes you uncomfortable. A heart to heart discussion with a peace compromise. That’s all!

Some advice I’m even seeing here. Calling her all sorts of derogatory names. Anyway, they’ve warned me about how mentally juvenile some nairalanders can be. The first page of this thread says it all.

If you’re reading this and you truly love her and she’s never given you any reason to doubt her, act your 36 - 40 years of age and have a mature conversation with her. Then both of you should set boundaries and move forward in love, trust and understanding.

Hi. Amazing thread. Learning so much.

Please this upfront what does it cover and is it paid yearly?
More importantly, does anyone know the salary for FCCPC (formerly CPC) and if it pays upfront? Is it a good agency to work in? Do they pay well?

Thank you so much.

thatyorubaboy:
I’ve been member of IM academy for a while...in summary, DO NOT waste your money on it.. the people you call your friends are only pressuring you because of their selfish gains...if you join, they get paid...

Also note that you will be paying monthly subscription money in dollars.....if you need more information, request for my digits

Wow. Thanks so much. The economy is too bad for me to be pumping my hard earned money into someone else’s pocket.

Quenmoly:
Lol don’t join them pls.....keep ur money oo

Thanks So much for this input. Please have you had any negative experience with them? Or do you know my one that has? I’d really appreciate it if you can share.

PrincessGlow:
What is IM academy

It’s a forex training academy where they claim to teach people how to trade on their own. They also have what they call mentors abi chairmen and women that also teach people how to take trades in the forex market.

In the last six months I’ve had various friends try to get me into the IM trading academy. Lots of testimonies and shouting all over my WhatsApp stories. However, I noticed that they’ve been a bit quiet since May. Also they seem to be recycling the same pictures of profits.

I made about 500k on some transactions this year and I am considering trying my luck since one particular friend has been on my neck and swears by his achievements.

Has anyone had any experience with them? Is it as profitable as they make it out to be? Or is it just another ponzu scheme. I need honest answers.

Thank you.

My friends keep on trying to drag me into IM Academy. I’ve noticed they’re not posting like before. Anyone know anything about them?

NewDelhi:


https://punchng.com/reps-consider-scrapping-nysc-as-bill-reaches-second-reading/?amp

I woke up from sleep to let you know that because of the evil statement you made about the murdered 14 year old girl who was killed because refused to date her school mate, her fate will be your portion. Your comment was so vile nairaland had to delete it. Disgusting pile of dung!

How dare you?! Did you crawl out of a sewer or are you actually one of those evil degenerates destroying our society? I’m sure you’re a rapist, murderer and a political thug.
Everything is a joke to you people. Not caring if they have family and friend grieving that can see these hurtful words you make. You hide under the cover of anonymity to say the most awful things. I’m sure your mind inspires the devil. Your heart must be the origin of evil. You will learn the hard way that there are consequences for every action unless you repent.

Makatony03:
May the same fate reach ur sister's AND mother bastard

That one cannot have relatives. He was found in the evil forest. Worse fate awaits him and the people who liked his comment.

Simran94:

You and the 12 people who liked this stupid comments are idiots

They are 26 now who liked his evil comment. A young life was lost and they turn it into a joke and say the most evil things. No woman gave birth to them. They must have crawled out of the sewers. Rats with opposable thumbs.

NewDelhi:
Too bad. RIP young one. If you had accepted the offer , your life wouldn't have ended tragically.

Moral of the story.

If man toast you, no dey do shakara. Some guys are crazy, they'll get jealous and stalk you, things can get horribly wrong.

A young girl was beaten to death because she refused to partake in immorality and focus on her studies, and this is the best you have to say? You and people Who liked your comment deserve to have died in the place of the 14 year old girl who was beaten to death because she didn’t want to date a boy. Everything is a joke to you hopeless degenerates. Say whatever you like to me I don’t care but a worse fate awaits you for your stupidity.

.