Read all your posts aπϑ ‎​​†h♌nkڪ y'all for your opinions aπϑ suggestions,i needed τ̣̣ђё trashing aπϑ every thing i got from you guys,that's y i came †☺ nairaland,ΒƱζ it still didnt make ‎​♍Ε feel any better cos wat kind of a man claim †☺ love a woman aπϑ not care abot her wellbeing,
Just last night,he called †☺ tell ‎​♍Ε he bought some clothes,shoes aπϑ other stuffs for ‎​♍Ε aπϑ τ̣̣ђё unborn baby, aπϑ he has excess luggage from τ̣̣ђё things he bought. He prefers i wear clothes aπϑ shoes than sending money for his wife's aπϑ unborn baby's upkeep?
Ɣ☺ΰ‎​​ guys have said Ÿ̲Ơ̴̴̴̴͡uя bit aπϑ i understand perfectly,ΒƱζ he who wears the sgoes knows where it pinches him

cotton101: poster I quit my job cos my husband told me to (so jenny lay off her - yes it was a stupid decision and I have carried the cross) But I had a lot of money saved so. anyway.............moving on to boyfriend issue

poster my child is over 1 and from the moment of conception until tomorrow I have not seen a kobo from her father - did I get a boyfriend - na wah o - man was the LAST thing on my mind, what do you plan to teach ur child when he/she is born - when the going gets tough commit adultery?? I don't even want to start to say I understand what your going thru cos being pregnant with no money is completely different from being pregnant and broke in the UK. But my dear boyfriend is not the way forward. What are u even going to be doing with him heavily pregnant??

I suggest you stop talking to this ur husband cos calling him is not doing anything for you, when he calls answer him after all he is still ur husband but stop calling and crying cos it is obviously not touching him. Is there nobody who can talk sense into him - honestly I don't know why these men place curses on their own irresponsible heads - and then tomorrow wonder why bad things keep happening to them - KMT.

‎​​†h♌nkڪ

chaircover: First of all I dont think that the husband is financially able in the first instance and that is why 2 years after marriage, wifey is still In Nigeria. If he is on good standing financially/immigration status, visa processing shouldn't take 2 years. Maybe he is one of these people who borrow money or work triple shifts just to make enough money to show off for a 3 week holiday in Nigeria, thus bamboozling people into thinking that they are financially OK when they are actually living hand to mouth.

The fact the husband did not rent a house even if it meant downsizing to a smaller property for his wife, but sent her back home to live with her parents speaks volumes. It also leaves a bad taste in the mouth because a serious husband will send his wife to HIS family and not back to hers.

The problem with many of us is that we choose not to think and we leave important decisions that concern our life to be made by other people. Yes he told you to quit your job and learn a trade but did you carry out any investigations on his actual financial capability or whether in fact you can still work and learn a trade part time. What is his immigration status over there and how long were you told that it will take to get your papers? Did you even think about learning the trade in Europe; must the trade be learnt in Nigeria only? Her husband told her to give up her job fair enough, but did she come up with any reasons why it isnt a good idea not to give up that job just yet and humbly put those across to him?

Anyway back to the question, IMO the boyfriend angle will only complicate issues. What you should concentrate on is finding a job or finishing that training ASAP and get back on your feet.

Wishing you all the best

If he wasn't finanicailly able dear, i won't be dis bitter,i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ ♍Ɣ post dis Iڪ a new behaviour which i dont understand started after i moved back home and got pregnant,which i still dont nderstand y,as for taking 2 yrs †☺ process a visa,he Iڪ financially able aπϑ his status,he Iڪ a legal citizen aπϑ works i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ a good firm.he has sent all τ̣̣ђё neccessary docments and letter of invitation for family reunion,there was just a little disparity i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ ♍Ɣ mum's signature wit ♍Ɣ age affidavit aπϑ they had †☺ leagalize ♍Ɣ arriage documents only aπϑ told ‎​♍Ε †☺ go bak aπϑ redo τ̣̣ђё age declaration aπϑ wait for their lawyers †☺ come again for verification,so τ̣̣ђё travelling part isnt his fault aπϑ by τ̣̣ђё time they'll come again,i'd already put †☺ bed or i won't be fit †☺ travel,so we decided †☺ wait dis time till after delivery plus i moved back home cos it was parenys address i used i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ all ♍Ɣ documents so it was there τ̣̣ђё lawyers came.♍Ɣ problem Iڪ dat he finds it difficult †☺ send ‎​♍Ε money these days for ♍Ɣ upkeep aπϑ hospital checkups, aπϑ for τ̣̣ђё fact dat ♍Ɣ health doesnt move him. Or Iڪ it becos A̶̲̥̅♏ home and dat watever happens,♍Ɣ parents are there.

jennykadry: Whoever is your adviser is doing a good job at it as I can see

Have you ever taken responsibility for your own very dumb and silly actions? Which woman in this day and age will quit her job because a man told her to without a back up plan in place?

How very wise of you

Yes i understand you and A̶̲̥̅♏ regretting it too,ΒƱζ he was nicer then aπϑ i quit †☺ learn a craft cos,it fetches more money in europe ,cos even wit a masters degre, Ɣ☺ΰ‎​​ cant get τ̣̣ђё kind of job dat'll pay well i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ europe,xcept Ɣ☺ΰ‎​​ go †☺ their language school go for a job training for six months or a year,nd all dat Iڪ going †☺ take almost 2yrs.so i quit †☺ learn a craft, aπϑ @ dat time it wasn't a bad decision,ΒƱζ now,i can see its sooooooo wrong a decision †☺ take

And †☺ think dat wenever he comes home,he spends dat money dat he says dat he doesnt have,like his lie Iڪ going †☺ end the next day. I dont feel like a wife @ all,i feel like a pregnant girlfriend.

cotton101: I'm trying to understand something - in your current state what is on your mind is getting a boyfriend? na wah o!! marriage vows are very cheap these days!!

Have you asked your husband why he is behaving like this?

Yes,getting a boyfriend is τ̣̣ђё only thing on mind,he comes back twice a year, aπϑ doesnt send money for ♍Ɣ upkeep,(dat's some marriage resposibilty)
Ask him y he Iڪ behaving like dis? Wen he calls ‎​♍Ε everyday †☺ reassure ‎​♍Ε of his "love for ‎​♍Ε"
I know wat you are thinkin, aπϑ i thot about it too,nobody Iڪ going †☺ approve of it even myself ΒƱζ am so frustrated right now,i stay up @ night thinkin aπϑ ♍Ɣ bp is above normal for a pregnant woman and @ ♍Ɣ age too.i cant be a faithful wife in τ̣̣ђё grave and if anything happens †☺ ‎​♍Ε,i bet he ѠȊ̝̊̅ℓℓ dump ♍Ɣ kids wit ♍Ɣ parents aπϑ get married sharply

uboma: Will getting another bf solve ur problm? Y dnt u go and meet ur husband's parents and explain the situation to them so they can talk to their son and if possible move in with them (parents inlaw)

His mum Iڪ late and his dad stays in the village,i should move in wit him and add to his burden?

iaabc: And that is the best solution you can profer for yourself? How will a boyfriend solve your problem? How about getting a job after the baby? How about using the craft you learnt to start making ends meet?

Still i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ process of learning a craft,and i stopped for a while cos am having a little complications in ♍Ɣ pregnancy so ♍Ɣ doctor advised i should stay off stress.getting another job,i'll be due i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ sept, aπϑ i cant just leave ♍Ɣ baby till maybe after 3months before getting another job

Ђδω many have you kissed?

Am a married woman,got married 2yrs ago.i was working with an it firm wen i got married.my husband lives in europe.our marriage was going well until we agreed i quit my job cos of my visa processing to join him and then learn a handiwork either †☺ sew or braid.i moved back to ♍Ɣ parents house last year and since then,♍Ɣ husband has changed from good to worse.anytime i ask him for money for ♍Ɣ upkeep,he tells me he doesnt have even though A̶̲̥̅♏ pregnant.NB: he uses †☺ send ‎​♍Ε enough money wen i was working,ΒƱζ now,τ̣̣ђё story is exactly the opposite.
I've been wondering y he changed,is it because i moved in with ♍Ɣ parents or wat, aπϑ ♍Ɣ parents are not rich,they are struggling to survive,so i keep wondering y he should just quit taking care of his pregnant wife.if i wasn't pregnant,i wouldn't mind ΒƱζ A̶̲̥̅♏ pregnant aπϑ almost due(our 1st baby).

Right now,am so frustrated dat most times i cry myself to sleep,I've thot of ways †☺ make things better for ‎​♍Ε,ΒƱζ no one ѠȊ̝̊̅ℓℓ employ an almost due pregnant woman.

Right now,i have made up my mind to get a boyfriend for myself once i deliever my baby,cos I've got †☺ make ends meet,I've got ♍Ɣ struggling parents †☺ take care of,♍Ɣ siblings are still in school,and a baby on the way,i cant just fold ♍Ɣ hands aπϑ watch uus suffer.♍Ɣ parents are trying and they cant continue taking care of ‎​♍Ε(financially and otherwise) now dat am married.