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I got married last year and I found out just a week after our wedding that thru out the time my fiancée and I were dating she was constantly cheating on me with a married man and all of this continued until few months before our wedding.

We started dating since when we were in Uni but she was a junior colleague in school so I left her in school in 2016 and according to her, she and this man started seeing each other in 2017 till few months to our introduction.

I first found out about the man in 2018 when I strtd working in Lagos and at that time she was done with school preparing for NYSC so she was also in Lagos. I accidentally came across her chat with the guy on her phone during one of her visits to my place in Lagos.
I was very upset with her she apologized and claimed there was nothing btw both of them that it was just a flirtous chat and she was sorry tho deep inside of me I was not convinced but I honestly forgave her and we continued like nothing happened.
She was lucky to do her NYSC in Lagos so I felt since we were back in the same environment, we were fine not knowing I was wrong.
2019 election time, she was going for INEC adhoc staff work so she branched at my house before leaving and a call came in on her fone and it was this same man again. I was very mad with her that she was still keeping contact with the man and she said it wasn’t a frequent contacting that he only calls once in awhile to check up on her. I foolishly believed her again and I let it slide with the promise that there was never going to be any form of contact between them again not knowing she became more careful with their dealings.

Feb 2020 during one of our late night calls I perceived she wasn’t in her house even tho she wanted to hurriedly end the call with the claim that she was feeling sleepy but I told her to hang-on on the call then told her to send picture of where she was and that was where I found out she was in an hotel that night. I honestly wanted to run mad.
First thing the following morning she was in my house all teary, begging and she was remorseful. Foolish me again thought she was truly remorseful. I honestly wanted to call it quit at that time but I didn’t just know what was wrong with me. I forgave her sat her down and we had heart to heart talk and I even told her about the risk involved cos if anything had happened to her whilst she was lodged in the hotel with this man, he would ve quietly left and would ve gone back to his abode and trust me I would ve been the first person any of her family members would ve called or thought she was with. Foolish me again thought it was truly going to end there.
A week after our wedding I received a pop up notification from Linkedin that someone checked my profile and it was this man. I was very upset cos the man’s name alone makes me sick and it reminds me of all this past that I had buried.

I became furious about that and I really wanted to know what could ve given this man the audacity so I started digging my wife’s phone (trust me she was very smart with it cos she deleted all of their chats but I was later able to get some of these infos from blocked msgs to backup folders and many more) and I saw what my eyes wasn’t meant to see.
I saw that she and this guy had always been in constant communications with each other shared pictures with each other inclusive of explicit pictures. There was neva a time they stopped communicating even when she was in my house during the lockdown in 2020 and this was just few weeks after the hotel saga. I also found out that just a month after the hotel saga (March 2020) she and this man still lodged again even tho she had lied at first that the one I had initially found out was the only time it eva happened.

Since I discovered all of this, I ve been completely mad with myself for bringing myself into this mess, I ve been having serious sleepless night, less productive at work. I ve completely been a shadow of myself. The sad part about all of this is I can’t discuss this with anybody so that alone is making me run mad.
One of the reasons I’m angry is I can’t fathom the reason she keeps going back to this man cos I honestly know it wasn’t for money cos she is financially stable likewise myself and if it’s about looks this stupid man doesn’t come close to me. The question I keep asking her is WHY and which she has not been able to provide an answer to this question and I ve honestly been loyal and very open to her which she is very much aware of that.

I’m sure many people would say I should call it quit but it is quite difficult for me cos she is pregnant tho with claim that I am responsible for it which I still ve my doubts. I was brought up in a proper family settings and I enjoyed love from both my mother and father before his demise. I ve seen the dangers of raising a child by separated parents. The child bears most of the brunt and which I don’t want it to happen if truly the child is mine.
A part of me also want to call it quit cos of the utter disrespect, disloyalty, and the question of won’t this happen again and would I be able to cope with this.

She on the other hand has been teary, showing remorse for her actions but I don’t even know if she is sincere or not and if I forgive her again she truly won’t go back to this kind of act.

I contacted the stupid man and the idiot wanted to be wyning me telling me my wife was just a very good friend of his and nothing more, she respects me a lot, she loves me so much blablabla. I told him baba abeg stop capping nonsense and stop the foolery.
This fool is a professional con man married to a beautiful Medical Doctor with two kids that I know of- tho my wife claims he told her he doesn’t ve children (the weyrey even dey deny in children). I just pity his wife cos this community dick she is married to would one day bring home something that would kill them (STIs amongst other) .

I had neva seen myself writing out my family issues on SM but Omo this one too heavy for my Heart and since I can't discuss it with anybody make I just pour am out here cos it is just too heavy

Mod pls do not move to FP. it is just for ranting sake