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Literature / Re: All The Women I Ever Dated - NYSC Chronicles by jacob05(m): 1:58pm On May 26, 2020
waywardpikin:
I saw Toyosi that evening and we had a nice time over a full chicken and some smoothies. Saw her off to her hostel and that was that. The next morning during morning drills, I was feeling restless once again as I usually am, so I was moving up and down the three lines of Platoon 7. I found myself in front of the platoon at this time, where most of the ladies where, as we all lined up according to height. A female soldier attached to our platoon with an ass like a billboard ordered all of us to move forward a bit. As everyone was moving forward, the light-skinned girl directly in front of me was still standing in one place, holding up our own lane. With my arms crossed, I bent a little and gently nudged her forward with my shoulders. She turned around to look up at me and my heart skipped for a second. She had the most beautiful face I had ever seen, with the most alluring feline eyes. Totally gorgeous, completely my spec, therefore, not my type.

"I’m sorry," I stuttered. "They said we should move forward."

"Oh okay," she said as she complied.

A minute later, and because yours truly just couldn’t help himself:

"So what’s your name?"

"My name is Sarah," said the lady – and that was it. We spent that whole morning drill gisting, with me putting my comedic skills on display and making her laugh. Somehow, I have a knack for getting people to open up and talk to me. I knew most of the people in my platoon. I knew most of their names. Knew their plans, who’s dating who, who’s tripping (translation: crushing) for who, who is trying to work what to where, etc. When I’m in the mood, my propensity for amebo (translation: gossip) is off the charts, which is why it’s totally surprising that I’m at the same time quiet and reserved. I had never seen this girl in our platoon before, and I told her as much.

"Well, that’s because I don’t always come out. I’ve been in the hostel for a few days so I just said let me stretch my legs," Sarah said.

"Wow, so you’re one of those bad eggs that are always dodging morning drills?"

"Yes, I cannot kill myself. I hate stress," she retorted, laughing.

Lackadaisical and nonchalant? A woman after my own heart!

When the assembly was over I was about leaving just like that but on second thought I decided to ask for her number which she gave me. I gave her mine as well. Of course, I had no intention of calling her or contacting her at all as the whole thing with Nife had taught me to keep my emotions in check and always hold things at face value. I only collected her number as a force of habit. Sometimes it’s impolite to chat with a girl you just met for so long without at least asking for her number, especially if you both enjoyed the conversation. It doesn’t matter whether you’re going to call her or not. At least, that’s just my thinking.

In the afternoon of that same day, we were forced to sit under the canopy and listen to some boring lectures. I sat all by myself, dark shades on, earphones plugged, glued to my mobile phone. You see, my mobile phone is my best friend, and it helps me to while away time. I must have been sitting there for hours when I noticed a familiar face seated just behind me from the corner of my eyes. I turned to look. It was Sarah – the mysterious, seductive, beautiful, and alluring Sarah. Given how long we had spent in camp up to this point, it felt like she had just dropped out of the sky. Where had she been all this while?

"Ahn ahn…" I said, opening my mouth like a typical Yoruba man. "So you are here?"

"Yes, I am."

"What are you doing here?"

She looked at me quizzically. "I’m sitting down."

"I mean, how long have you been here?"

"I don’t know. Maybe almost an hour now," she said.

"Almost an hour? Didn’t you see me sitting in front of you?" I mean, come on.

"I did but you seemed so engrossed in whatever you were doing on your phone so I didn’t want to intrude."

"You didn’t want to intrude," I replied incredulously. I forgot my phone in the twinkle of an eye and dragged my chair to sit beside her. Soon we were lost in each other’s company, staring into each other’s eyes subtly and not so subtly. There were no airs about her and she was so easy to talk to, like a long lost friend I hadn’t seen in ages. After the lectures, it was time for SAED so I bade her farewell and moved to the hall where they would pretend to be imparting knowledge on us when what they were really doing was marketing so we could pay to learn whatever they said they could teach us. After the SAED program, I met up with Toyosi who had once again seen me from afar, enjoying all the electrical charges her body had to offer, and ignoring what I was beginning to suspect was an emotional attachment on her part. Our conversations never went too deep and I made sure to avoid topics that would lead to any romantic discussions. I kept it to cracking jokes, talking about her wonderful body, tapping current and asking about her numerous boyfriends and toasters. Anything to deflect the focus from me – or us. I didn’t want to start anything I wouldn’t be able to finish or even create a new enemy. From there I went on to have lunch with the demure Hajia.

Hajia had been very angry and bitter towards me of late. She had been complaining that I was no longer spending so much time with her. And she was right, I wasn’t. But it wasn’t because I didn’t care it was because I’d known more people since the day that we first met and as such it wasn't possible for me to always spend so much time with her like before. However, I assured her that I would definitely try to improve. We had a fun time together at lunch but I couldn’t help but notice something significantly different about my bestie. She had gotten more audacious! She was all touchy, resty, and feely. She’d tap my shoulders when I joked, she’d grope my arms when we spoke, and she’d occasionally lean her whole body on me, with her soft boobs crushing into me. Of course, this all happened casually as we spoke and it all seemed so natural, at least that’s what the look on her face said. I didn’t know what to make of it or how to react so I acted like I didn’t notice either. She dragged me to the clinic to go see a friend of hers who was not feeling well and as we paid our condolences the lady seemed like she already knew so much about me.

By nightfall, I dragged myself into bed preparing for another mundane day in camp. I decided to check my phone one last time as is my custom, and what I saw made my face light up immediately.




"Hey, mister." The Whatsapp message from Sarah read.




***

Awesome post! I just downloaded okada books because of you.. keep it coming!

1 Like

Programming / Re: Python Programming by jacob05(m): 12:49am On Nov 29, 2019
Hello world smiley
Seun:
Bump
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 11:37am On Feb 09, 2019
temitayoolu:
If I slap you.


Congrats baba.


So you can't call me.

NB: I know this op outside of nl so people don't ask me for my number via dm.



Lool. No vex boss.. you know una dey always busy over there. Thanks!
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 11:42pm On Feb 08, 2019
Interview 30/01/2019
Travel Health Insurance Request Mail: 01/02/2019
Dropped Travel Health Insurance at Embassy: 04/02/2019
Passport with Approved Visa and Original documents Returned via Courier (DHL): 08/02/2019

smiley smiley smiley

3 Likes

Travel / Re: General German Student Visa Enquiries Part 5 by jacob05(m): 9:16am On Feb 06, 2019
Deustchemann:
Good morning guys.
I've submitted my documents for certification at the embassy. Just chilling around at the moment till 1pm.

Seems Mr Paulinus isn't around.. the man I saw attending to us didn't match the description of Paulinus.

But then, so far you have all the required documents and you cooperate appropriately grin grin you won't have a problem.
I was second on the certification queue. When I told the German lady I brought 5 sets, she was like shocked "What do you want to study in Germany?"

He’s on leave
Car Talk / Re: Save Your Salary For A Year, What Car Can You Afford ? by jacob05(m): 4:59pm On Feb 04, 2019

3 Likes

Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 9:43am On Feb 01, 2019
Got a mail from the embassy to forward travel health insurance for six months starting at my intended travel date.
Where can I get a cheap one ooo... (pocket don dry)
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 11:33pm On Jan 31, 2019
MY TRANSCRIPT
============

[Sorry in advance for blunders... First time giving a long account of my day smiley ]



Couldn't sleep because of the interview happening the next day. I mostly sleep late and wake up around 9-10am but now that my interview is 7 am I just can't configure myself to sleep early enough. I had arranged my documents into two folders labeled *Main Docs* and *Sup Docs*. The Main Doc folder contains all the required documents as listed on the main site while Sup Docs contains some additional documents for backup. Watched Frye on Netflix and while trying to get as much information about Germany in my head as possible (which later was not even asked!!!). Finally slept at around 1:30 am and told Siri to wake me up at 4:30 am.

4:30 am, the alarm woke me up and immediately pressed the snooze button and went into a mild sleep mode. (the alarm would trigger again in the next 9mins).
4:39 am, pushed the snooze button again but this time couldn't sleep. I checked google map and the estimate to the embassy is 20mins.
Ordered for Uber around 4:50 while I take my bath. The Uber driver arrived at around 5:02.

Got to the German Embassy at around 5:45 only to be told by a rather cool guy preparing to put on his uniform that to avoid being harassed by the police/security dudes that I should wait at the car park and come 30mins to my interview (6:30 am). It was a rainy morning and I did not know where the car park is. had to temporarily wait at the American Embassy's visa waiting area for a couple of minutes before sighting the car pack.

6:30 - The wait is over!!! I matched to the German embassy and met some dude ironing, a security man in uniform and one stern looking man in yellow and black trouser gisting. (In my mind I was like "could this be Paulinus?" he seems friendly - gisting and throwing banter - I was wrong!!!).
I was the first person there and I was told to bring out my appointment mail printout and my international passport which I did and was directed to the stern looking man! It was Mr Paulinus!

Mr Paulinus: Remove all your documents from the folder
Me: I have another folder which is for Supplementary Doc...
Mr Paulinus: STOP QUESTIONING ME!!! I DID NOT ASK YOU ABOUT ANY SUPPLEMENTARY DOC OR ANYTHING ... REMOVE ALL YOUR DOCUMENTS
[Hits his palm hard on the bench in front of him signifying where I should put it ]
Mr Paulinus: I'm not ready for all these nonsense this morning
Me: Ohh. Oh.. Ok.
I removed all the documents in both folders and placed them on the chair close to the bench
Mr Paulinus: WHERE IS YOUR APPLICATION FORM!
I searched the printouts and brought out the two application forms.
Me: Here
Mr Paulinus: IS THIS YOUR APPLICATION FORM!!! I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR ALL THESE... IT SEEMS YOU'RE NOT READY... SECURITY, CALL THE NEXT PERSON.
Me: Please sir, this is it... ---- showing him the forms which clearly states Application form
Security Man: Come here, just listen
I went back and the security man.. Bless the security man. he told me to be calm and just wait ... very nice man
While I waited, I watched him attend to 3 other people. He was much more tolerant of their mistakes and I was wondering if my village people were up early.
The process is just to separate the docs into original and photocopies following Commander Paulinus's ORDER. You'll likely be standing in front of 3 chairs - one chair for original the other two for the photocopies. you're to place each file one by one as announced by Commander Paulinus.

Mr Paulinus: HEY, COME HERE. HOPE YOU'LL LISTEN THIS TIME! OR ELSE I"LL SEND YOU BACK AND WON'T ATTEND TO YOU AGAIN!
Me: oo ook.
Mr Paulinus: Your Application forms
I presented him the exact documents I presented earlier.
He removed the staple pins on the forms and pinned them again by the side and placed the application forms each face down on the two chairs for the photocopied files.
Mr Paulinus: Your international passport data page
Me: (quickly reached for the file)
Mr Paulinus: DON'T BE TOO EXCITED!!! CALM DOWN!!!
Me: (I'm like what's wrong with this man!! let me be great jare!!! I looked back and the security man was just giving me eye to be cool)
Me - [I placed each on the two chairs]
He went to the other two people waiting for his instruction, called the next file and heads towards me
Mr Paulinus: declarations according to Section 54 Paragraph 2 Nr. 8 of the German Alien's Law
Me: [I placed each on the two chairs]
He went to others and came back
Mr Paulinus: I think you heard me well when I was telling the others about how to arrange your school certificate ... From lowest to the highest... Primary ... Secondary... University
Me: Ok
[I placed each of the school certificates on the two chairs following the lowest to the highest other and placed the originals on the third chair]
Mr Paulinus: Your NYSC certificate
I never knew he'd ask for NYSC certificate because it was not on the checklist but I brought it as part of the supplementary documents and I thought I had copies of it but did not!!!! I felt dumb searching for photocopies of it which I could not find.
He came back.
Me: I don't have it.
Mr Paulinus: I thought I saw it [pointing to my files]
Me. Yee..eee.. aaa.. I don't have the photocopies
He gave me a wild look then
Mr Paulinus: Work experience letters
Me: [I placed my current employment work contract on the chair for original and the copies on the other chairs]
Mr Paulinus: Birth Certificate and Age declaration
Here... I was like WTF, I don't have the Age declaration letter... I only had the little registration of birth slip from the local government. I swiftly placed the small slip original and the photocopies on the chairs. Thankfully he did not check if I had the Age declaration letter (I called the embassy earlier and I was told it's fine but I've been hearing conflicting info online about it)
Mr Paulinus: Biographically old document, don't place the original there because it can easily get lost
Me: [I placed the copies of my voter registration card on the chairs]
Mr Paulinus: Are you going to use only one thing for the Biographically old document?
I had made copies of two other cards I thought I can substitute for my voter card if it got rejected. I placed each of the copies on the chairs
Mr Paulinus: Approval from Employment Agency
Me: [I placed the copies on the chairs]
Mr Paulinus: Work Contract
Me: [I placed the copies on the chairs]

He opened a page in the Application form and placed other copies in it then clipped it and did the same for the other duplicate application form and duplicate copies. He clipped the original documents too and placed them in one of the folders I brought and clipped it too. He then ushered me in!

I did not take my phone to the embassy and only had my watch on. I removed the watch and placed my documents in the provided tray and passed through the metal detector after which I was given a body search. I was given a key to the locker where my watch was placed and signed-in on a file that contains all the people scheduled for the day.

I was then told to sit at the waiting area while I watch a lady applying for student visa speak with the lady at the counter. I thought we’re going to be interviewed by a German but I was wrong. It was a calm looking Nigerian lady I saw. When she was done with the lady applying for student visa she left the counter and went to the main building. Took like 10mins before coming back and signaling that she is available on the digital screen. I was told security guys that it’s my turn!

The lady asked for my original documents. I gave her the clipped folder for the originals and she told me to remove the originals from the folder. I gave her the documents and waited while she checked the documents…. She saw where I work and smiled then asked jokingly why everyone is leaving my current employer and asked if I know someone named XXXXX... I just murmured through.. I was nervous after Mr Paulius’s wahala. She asked if my contract is fixed or unlimited. She requested for the other copies and checked them for completeness.

LADY: Let’s begin the interview
LADY: When did you graduate from school
ME: Oammm .. Oammh.. 20…. hmmmmmm.. Can I please check from my docs I can’t seem to remember
LADY: simple question, those that graduated in the 90s sef remember (it’s funny/amazing how friendly she was able to say this without making me feel worried.)
LADY: I’ll ask you later, let’s continue to the next question
LADY: Do you speak German
LADY: Do you have relatives in Germany
LADY: How did you come to know about the job
LADY: How many hours of work
ME: Told her
LADY: I mean, per day
ME: hmmmm.. told her
LADY: What will be your salary
LADY: What’s the **** for the job [I did not hear the part well.. ]
I started to explain the recruitment process but she stopped me and asked what are the skills needed for the job and I told her
LADY: Were you working before your current employment
LADY: How and where did you gain the skill required for the Job
LADY: Why Germany instead of Nigeria
LADY: What’s your plan afterward

She request for the visa fee, took my fingerprints and gave me a receipt and told me that would be all.
As I was about turning around to leave, I remember there’s a question I still haven’t answered. I reminded her and she asked if I have an answer I murmured and she reached for my document where she checked my graduation year and told me. Very Nice Lady!!!!

Went back to the metal detector guys ( and a lady) collected my things... had to tip them 1k.

THE END.

16 Likes 2 Shares

Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 10:34am On Jan 31, 2019
NRIAGUDUBEM:


The appointment went well. She asked me similar questions which were already listed in this thread at some point
It was relatively straight forward questions.
Same here

1 Like

Travel / Re: General German Student Visa Enquiries Part 5 by jacob05(m): 12:08am On Jan 29, 2019
Deustchemann:


1. I'm not too sure about using that court affidavit. Try to approach the ministry of education in your state to see what can be done to replace your certificate
2. Just bring any document that you obtained from anytime up till 2014... If you have completed a bachelors, you can find a course form, or maybe you use your jamb slip. Anything that identifies you sha, and is older than 5yrs
3. if you were born before December 1992, you'll have to use declaration of age deposed by your dad or head of family.
If you were born after, NPC certificate can be accepted.. now, I do not know if state/local government issued birth certificates can be accepted in lieu of NPC, but then we can't afford to risk anything. If we'll need to get NPC certificate, just get it and be at rest

This birth cert thing is a bit confusing... called the embassy's hotline and the call center lady said local government issued birth cert is accepted but hearing conflicting story here..

As anyone used local government issued birth cert here? has anyone been rejected cus of local government issued cert?
Travel / Re: General German Student Visa Enquiries Part 5 by jacob05(m): 1:38pm On Jan 22, 2019
Lburna:
Hi guys,

Please I have a question about this age declaration thing. That part on the checklist that says
"Birth Certificate from National Population Commission or Declaration of Age deposed to by head of Family (Please note that an NPC birth certificate may only be accepted if the applicant is born after December 13th, 1992)".

What am I supposed to do exactly if I was born before 1992?
Local Government issued birth certificate or court affidavit would do
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 11:58am On Jan 20, 2019
temitayoolu:
It's supporting documents it's not extremely important but if you can please take it.


Copy of appointment print two copies infact all documents print four copies just in case. Printing is 10 naira at unilag bro lol.



If you are still working your job offer letter or introduction letter from your employer.


Me I had resigned so I showed them my resignation letter.
Ok. Thanks
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 11:07am On Jan 20, 2019
temitayoolu:



I got these online but they are similar to the questions they asked me during mine and most of my friends.
a) What are you applying for?
b) Can I see your original Passport?
c) How did you come to know about this opportunity?
d) How was the interview/evaluation done?
e) What is the job about? What will be your designation, role, profile?
f) Are you currently working in Nigeria?
g) So you’ve taken a day off today?
h) Can I see your previous job experience letters?
i) Do you have a copy of your appointment letter?
j) Can I see your latest salary slips?
k) Why do you want to leave your current job and move to Germany?
l) So you’ve already been in Europe?
m) Can I see your old passport?
n) Have you stayed in German before?
o) When is your intended joining date? ---- This is very important and this would determine when your Visa would start
p) What will be your salary there?
q) How long do you intend to stay in Germany?
r) Will your family be accompanying you?
s) Have you already arranged for a house in Germany? Where do you plan to stay?



Visa processing can take up to two - eight weeks.

Make sure all your documents are also complete so Uncle Paulinus won't send you back at the gate. Best of luck
*j) Can I see your latest salary slips?* that isn't in the list of required docs na which kinda wahala be this
*i) Do you have a copy of your appointment letter?* did you make 2 copies of this?
*h) Can I see your previous job experience letters?* what if it's not available? (I don't have letters from my previous employer(s))
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 12:58am On Jan 19, 2019
therealclown:




Will a regular German health insurance work for the appointment? My employer has signed me up with TK already.

Is prove of health insurance required for the interview?
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 1:48am On Jan 18, 2019
Sam8850:
No, my employers were the ones who filed my documents at the Alien Office for the pre-approval request and that was sent to Lagos Consulate.


hmmm... And you confirmed the Lagos Consulate got it?
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 1:18am On Jan 18, 2019
Sam8850:
Mehn Bro you have to really calm down and if you have a job here in Naija hold on to it until the day you get your visa you can just resign.

I am in your situation or should better say was in your situation, I needed to leave in a month but it took me 2 months before I got an appointment (mainly because I didn't know what time to check for appointment) then eventually went for my interview in November and till now I'm yet to get my visa. Once you go for your interview just pray and hope to be lucky as you may get your visa within 2 weeks or longer, so let your employers know it may take longer time.

Did you present an approval letter from Employment Agency?
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 10:23pm On Jan 17, 2019
temitayoolu:
Quick Question are you familiar with this #lagos-all If yes then let's dm else you are not who i'm thinking.

grin grin grin grin
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 7:01pm On Jan 17, 2019
Triumphantglory:


Try at midnight. I had no issues getting visa dates for myself and three kids but I used a Mac book so you could try that too

What advantage does Mac book give? undecided undecided undecided


Oga temitayoolu thanks for your good work here sir.

2 Likes

Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 11:08am On Jan 15, 2019
temitayoolu:
And before I forget you'd need at least five years experience before they can really take a look at your profile for IT or you have a crazy git / linkedin profile smiley
Those of us using bitbucket nko? and private repo? undecided
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 1:45pm On Jan 09, 2019
.
Travel / Re: General German Work And Family Re-union Visa Enquiries by jacob05(m): 11:49am On Jan 09, 2019
Awesome thread..

1 Like 1 Share

Travel / Re: General German Student Visa Enquiries Part 5 by jacob05(m): 9:55am On Jan 08, 2019
DameBeloved:
Hello fam. Good morning whoever needs appointment should get on here now https://service2.diplo.de/rktermin/extern/choose_categoryList.do?locationCode=lago&realmId=695.the portal is open. Common hurry!!!
That's for Passport and ID matters not for Long Term Visa
Travel / Re: General German Student Visa Enquiries Part 5 by jacob05(m): 12:33pm On Jan 06, 2019
Chriswazo:
nigerian programmers want to teach people what they have not succeed in
who offend you? undecided
Travel / Re: General German Student Visa Enquiries Part 5 by jacob05(m): 12:02am On Jan 06, 2019
danielsunky:
Hello bro, please is it a must you go with your dad to get this done? I am also in this category and I will need your help.
My dad got this for me when I was young. So, couldn't be of much help.
Travel / Re: General German Student Visa Enquiries Part 5 by jacob05(m): 10:44pm On Jan 05, 2019
Generous222:
If it iz acceptable you wld see it on the checklist.

I actually called the embassy's call centre and the rep said it's acceptable, just want to hear people's thoughts
Travel / Re: General German Student Visa Enquiries Part 5 by jacob05(m): 8:50pm On Jan 05, 2019
Deustchemann:


Since you were born before December 1992, the NPC birth certificate won't be accepted from you.

Go to an High court with your dad or an elder in your family sha and get an age attestation deposed by your dad/family head. Go there with your passport photograph and his. The attestation is going to be stamped. When you get to the court, you'll already hear people advertising it.
That's what will be accepted from you.

Would REGISTRATION OF A BIRTH slip from Local Government (Births, Death and Burials Ordinance) be accepted too? (for someone born before December 1992) (it's a small slip, stamped and signed by the registrar)
Technology Market / Re: ... by jacob05(m): 3:07pm On Oct 13, 2018
Still available
Technology Market / Re: ... by jacob05(m): 5:29am On Oct 13, 2018
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Crime / Re: Notorious Armed Robber Nabbed By Security Men During Failed Operation. Photo by jacob05(m): 9:52pm On Oct 12, 2018
ipobarecriminals:
sad fine face criminal
What's fine about his face?


*ipobarecriminals* undecided undecided undecided
Technology Market / Re: ... by jacob05(m): 10:45am On Oct 12, 2018
Pic
Technology Market / Re: ... by jacob05(m): 10:53pm On Oct 11, 2018
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