Family / Re: Nairalanders Please Help, My First Son Is Behaving Somehow by Khaligraph: 11:58am On Apr 06, 2023 |
booksbo0k: Sorry for the long write up my people, I need advice.
My first son has been behaving somehow in our family, as if he's not part of this family... You and this boy can be in the same house but you might not set your eyes on him once for a whole day. He will be inside his room through out...
He has been telling me that he is currently working on going to rent his own place and live on his own and that if God helps him and he is able to achieve that, He will not have anything to do with our family again and that we will never set eyes on him ever again :[ ...
I would have not been bothered by such statement if it were coming from someone else, I would take it as a bluff. But this my son is someone that normally doesn't call people to check on them, not even us his parents..
When he was in his previous University before he dropped out, this boy can go for months, that is a whole semester stretch without calling anybody to know how you're doing, except you call him or maybe he wants to ask for money for something or school stuff....
We have five children and he is the first, the second and third children are away in University, he and the two last siblings are the only one's with us.. My husband refused him from going to University in a far place instead he gives him transport money to be going to his own University from home everyday...... He and his father don't even talk again except good morning greetings. He is only 21 ohh..
Let me give you guys small back story so that you can understand how all these things started.
My son graduated from secondary school (a boarding school) in 2017 at 16 years old... Initially, he said he wanted to study computer science as he said that was the course he loved and wanted to study. But my husband refused and persuaded him to study pharmacy because he worked at NAFDAC and he saw the way pharmacy graduates were living at his work place and the salary they were recieving. He and one of his chemist friend sweet talked him into going to study the course and I guess it was because he was young then and could not challenge his dad then that was why he gave in....
He wrote JAMB but he did not meet the cut of mark for pharmacy (but I later realised his score was good for computer science then)... No public University was willing to admit him for pharmacy then because his score was not good for the course but due to my husband love for the course and not wanting my son to lose admission that year , he decided to go the way of private University not minding their school fees...Long story cut short, my son got admitted into Madonna University where we were paying 1M naira every year.....After 3 years in the school and in 300L @18 years old, he began saying he was not interested in the school any longer, that he was tired of the course, that he's body is no longer in the school and blablabla that he wants to go and play football in Europe...
He came back for holiday during the beginning of covid and refused to go back to the school when they resumed, saying that he was only wasting our money by being in that school and he did not want to continue.....This got my husband really sad and angry....My son stayed home for almost two years doing nothing because my husband was adamant that if he would not go back to school, nothing for him, that all the money he has spent for school fees in that school can not be for waste that he can become a footballer after he graduates, saying no one can become a successful footballer without being a graduate, that it would later affect them in life...
But my son refused. I must confess, my son is extremely good at playing football. That was the talent i can confidently say that God personally gave to him from birth. Infact when he was graduating from secondary school, they gave him the award for the best graduating footballer and he was always the centre of attention anytime he plays at our church events. He friends used to call him "nima" then, I think...
I and my husband got tired of him staying at home for long so I went to meet with one pastor in our street who was based in the UK with his family but comes home sometimes for church related matters. I explained my son's situation to him and he offered to help my son travel out to chase his football career provided we have the funds for it. The man was secondary school class mates with "victor ikpe ekong" who was a former super eagles player but currently a pastor in Sweden. To my greatest surprise he called him on a WhatsApp video call in my presence and i was really surprised...He gave me the man's phone number to keep in contact and also scheduled a day to meet with my husband and have a discussion.. I told my son and he was very happy..I also told my husband and he was eager to meet with him at least, anything to solve my sons idleness at the time..
The pastor came to my our house on several occasions and discussed with my husband. My husband kept telling the pastor, saying he would like my son to be going to school while chasing his football career at the same time, a feat which pastor let us know would be difficult as one has to be dropped for the other. Unfortunately, my husband changed he's mind and said he was no longer interested in the whole footballer thing. He said he knew that my son wanted to become a footballer only because of girls. That he, my son knew that if he becomes a footballer, all the girls would like him, that that was the only reason he wanted to become a footballer, and that if football was his true destiny, he doesn't need to travel out for it to manifest, that he can be in Nigeria and make it from here.....That was how that chapter close like that. Pastor left for England few months after.....
After years of my son staying at home, my husband got tired. One night, he hired some Street thugs to come take my son away and beat him up...my son stayed with them for 2 weeks. When he returned, he said he was ready to go back to school. But my husband told him he won't be going back to any private University again. My son wrote jamb again to study computer science and was admitted into COOU. but my said he would not allow him go to any University that is not in the same state we are residing. Now the problem here was that all the public schools in the state we are staying will not accept you to study computer science unless you did chemistry in jamb. And my son did not do chemistry in jamb because he is not good in chemistry. If he was to study in the same state we were staying, he had to settle for another course, which he did...Now another problem arose. My husband refused to rent an apartment for my son around the school because the school is considerably far from our house, instead he decided to be giving him money (2000) everyday as transport fare to be going from home. This did not sit down well with my the boy and he again, said he was no longer interested in schooling again sef that he can't be going such far distance from home to the school everyday to study a Course he does not even like siting that it would be stressful and affect his academics and that it was unwise to be paying 60k a year as school fees while you spend 2k everyday as transport..My husband got angry and called on our estate CSO to come pick him up. They beat him so badly in public that when he got back home later in the evening, I went to check him in his room, his buttocks and back where scarred and red with huge marks...
Ever since, he has been going to the school from home and he has become very distant from us especially his dad. They don't talk again in the same house except "good morning sir"...
My son has turned into something else. He can stay indoors from morning till night. I would have said he has started keeping bad company but he does not even have a single friend, not one..Nobody calls him, and he doesn't call anybody...I have five children and he is the first. The second and third already gained admission this year in a private University and are in school currently, so he and he's last two siblings are the only one's with us now..
Why I'm writing this is because I'm scared..I'm beginning to fear that my son might commit suicide, he's beginning to show that kind of attitude.. And the plans he have to leave us forever to go and stay alone, I don't like it ohhhh...
Nairalanders please I need your advice. Wow wow wow! When I read this story I thought you were talking about my cousin. Exact same story. Same issue we faced. But luckily for us, we were able to defuse the situation. He's currently playing football at a U-19 team in Norway. If you don't mind ma. I'd like to speak with your son, if possible your husband. PM me please. This matter should be handled delicately. Ma'am you have been bessed with a wonderful family. Don't let little issues like this come between your husband and son. Don't mind your son says, it's out of frustration. We all have been in that situation at some point of our lives. 5 Likes |
Foreign Affairs / Re: Russian Cats Sanctioned & Banned By US, EU & FIFE (Photos) by Khaligraph: 10:20pm On Mar 03, 2022 |
It's raining sanctions in Russia lol. Even felines are not spared. |
Foreign Affairs / Re: Russian Cats Sanctioned & Banned By US, EU & FIFE (Photos) by Khaligraph: 7:37pm On Mar 03, 2022 |
|
Religion / Re: Why We Shut Down Synagogue Church - T.B Joshua's Widow Evelyn (Pics) by Khaligraph: 8:13am On Oct 23, 2021 |
There's something definitely wrong with this woman 16 Likes 3 Shares |
Sports / Re: Lionel Messi Is Presented To PSG Supporters For The First Time (Pics, Video) ) by Khaligraph: 2:32pm On Aug 11, 2021 |
Respect to messi and ronaldo. They've dominated football for so long. 33 Likes 1 Share |
Sports / Re: 4.7 Billion People Watched Euro 2020, With Over 300m Watching The Final (Photo) by Khaligraph: 4:16pm On Jul 13, 2021 |
Madddtttt! |
Foreign Affairs / Re: Trump During BLM Protest VS When His Supporters Invaded The US Capitol by Khaligraph: 10:45pm On May 19, 2021 |
|
Foreign Affairs / Re: Trump During BLM Protest VS When His Supporters Invaded The US Capitol by Khaligraph: 10:29pm On May 19, 2021 |
fergie001:
Mention me on a dead thread....I am learning it myself. Here. How were you able to copy the image url link? On my chrome and opera browser it only shows the option of copy image, which is useless as there's no url link attached to it. See image below
|
Foreign Affairs / Re: UK Police Mock Gangster Twins Showing How They Will Look When They Leave Jail by Khaligraph: 5:33pm On May 19, 2021 |
fergie001:
![](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/05/18/01/43109865-9589879-image-a-162_1621299363216.jpg) Cheshire Police toured a giant billboard (above) around Warrington showing digitally-aged pictures of siblings Leon and Anthony Cullen, 33, in a bid to show the risks of crime
How did you put attachments (photos, jpg) on posts? Especially on opera mini and chrome. I've been trying to copy photos url but i can't post it. foeedaba:
[img]Place image link within this symbol[/img] Yeah i know about that sir. The real problem is how to copy the image url link on chrome and opera. But thanks. |
Politics / Re: Buhari Loses 100K Followers On Twitter As Reno Omokri Starts #unfollowbuhari by Khaligraph: 10:18pm On Oct 10, 2020 |
myBraine: Who cares?
He's not ending anything out of pressure. Nigerians should make known their hidden agenda and stop hiding behind the EndSars mantra.
Buhari is not a Twitter president. If you're tired of his leadership, then leave his country.
You're unfollowing someone that's only following 26 world leaders. They'll all follow him back whenever they're in their right state of mind.
We all make mistakes. All 200m Nigerians should leave bcuz of just one Man? Hahahaha Look if the people of Nigeria wake up one morning and say enough is enough! Buhari would pack his bags and run because no force on earth can stop the will of 200m people, except God. Nigeria belongs to Nigerians. Be careful what you say! 180 Likes 7 Shares |
Crime / Re: Photos From #EndSARS Protest In Ogbomosho, Oyo State by Khaligraph: 9:33pm On Oct 10, 2020 |
Ayandokun2000:
You need to wake up from ur dream sir it's as if u no know LAUTECH Warri abi garri.... whatever and benin never start learning work sef, I dey tell you Lautech is just one school. Go to warri, abraka, benin town and see for yourself. Both old and young. Yahoo is legal in those places. 3 Likes |
Crime / Re: Photos From #EndSARS Protest In Ogbomosho, Oyo State by Khaligraph: 9:14pm On Oct 10, 2020 |
Tayor23: warri and benin dey learn... I've been to Oyo, Yahoo there is not as intense as it is in Warri, Benin, Abraka. 2 Likes |
Crime / Re: Photos From #EndSARS Protest In Ogbomosho, Oyo State by Khaligraph: 9:08pm On Oct 10, 2020 |
|
Crime / Re: Photos From #EndSARS Protest In Ogbomosho, Oyo State by Khaligraph: 9:02pm On Oct 10, 2020 |
dododawa1: Headquarters of Yahoo Yahoo but ENDSARS supported Wrong sir. Warri and Benin hold that title. 15 Likes |
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 8:56pm On Jun 04, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 6:10pm On Jun 03, 2020 |
Ok i get it if you're not up for this, it's fine. Am out. Taking down my posts now, you can take down yours.
Take care.
Cc Viicfuntop |
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 10:27am On May 31, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 3:56pm On May 28, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 6:41am On May 28, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 2:36pm On May 27, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 2:18pm On May 27, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 1:15pm On May 27, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 11:01am On May 27, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 6:25am On May 27, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 11:44pm On May 26, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 10:49pm On May 26, 2020 |
. |
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 5:29pm On May 26, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 5:48pm On May 18, 2020 |
|
Nairaland / General / Re: Nigerians are the best in the aspect of: Give your List! by Khaligraph: 7:56pm On May 07, 2020 |
|
Celebrities / Re: Hottest Nollywood Actresses In Their 40s by Khaligraph: 7:39pm On Apr 15, 2020 |
Wow |
Celebrities / Re: See Trending Photo Of Rich Hausa Girls Flaunting Their Iphone 11 Pro Max by Khaligraph: 8:57pm On Feb 12, 2020 |
Mtchewww
Pro Max wey regular street guyz dey use for my area. SMH 3 Likes |
Celebrities / Re: Davido And Chioma In Arabian Outfits (Pictures) by Khaligraph: 8:56am On Feb 07, 2020 |
They both look weird |