StevensJojo:

Case in point. I maintain- I pity the woman who has to live with you. I won’t descend to your level sir. I don’t play in mud.

A pigs playing ground is the mud, thas who you are mudasucker, in michael blacksons voice. Who would even mind to know what u are, when you a descendant of low life and low level.

StevensJojo:
Wierd how sexist this country is. The ladies are greedy. The guys arent? Someone who will descend to the level of killing another is not greedy.How myopic.
The truth remains- the only reason ladies are the ones falling is because the guys are the ones doing the rituals. Hence they target ladies- who are vulnerable and easy to overpower.
Greedy ladies on the other hand prefer to sell their bodies and hence fall into the hands of these greedy despicable individuals. These days, even the innocent fall prey.
The day ladies begin to do Yahoo plus, wel all think again.

This says a lot about u , feminist

StevensJojo:
I actually feel sorry for OPs wife. His demeanor so far in responding to opinions tell all we have to know!

daughters of jezeebel...i sight una..

Mod please close this thread.[quote][/quote]

Saintmary:

Now I see why your marriage is in trouble, how can you live in peace with a woman with this kind of caustic tongue, sure you will later say you were provoked.

Your senseless statement provoked it. So you can open ur mouth to tell your husband that since we now share the bill, dont tell me time has gone to come cook food, mehn i wish our kind of mothers are the same of these days, out of 100% of nowadays ladies, na like 5% still be like our mama....see this one dey talk sey i go dey share chores if. I wish i can send u an E-slap....u are nothing different from whim am bound with.

Saintmary:

Whether its 50/50 or 95/5 sharing is sharing.
If you want to demand that she take 100% charge of domestic chores, then you take 100% charge of bills. If you can't handle that, be ready to share chores too.
As for the caustic words you guys are throwing around, learn to control your tongue when you are angry, then she will learn from you.

Modern day useless wife material you are....i dont know which state you are from, but as a Yoruba man, we dont do shit like you have stated. Share chores? Abi olorinuruku nie ni? Do you think its easy to make money? Your own kind of marriage is a conditional one, not the one that is accustomed with ethics, moral and dignity. I doubt you are married so Bleep off this thread,

midnighter:


Hmm. Sorry...

Why dont you report her to her parents like you threatened last time At least she seems to be afraid of that

The first time she said i was wasting her bum bum, that she would give it to someone else, i reported that to her dad, mum is late, she dad developed some sort of heart issue. Then there was a time i arranged a meeting again with the father and my mum after she had threatened to stab me with a knife that i want the marriage dissolved, though it was sorted out, the man had promised never to be called again, in which after we had another issue, it was her uncle that came forth. I didnt want to tell the dad of this, because the man might just die. Thats what am trying to avoid.

Please you all should understand this....this is exactly how it happened. Before she left, she knew quite well that I had requested the breakfast, cos most times I dont even take breakfast, or probably eat it late, but when I request then I need it. Anyone who knows how to code will understand the extreme level of getting job done. She had told me she will be back before or 9am, so it was already past 10, so i called and said is this the 9am u promised? She then raised ehr voice saying, we share the bills together that if she doesnt do this, how would she be making the money? I was like i didnt marry you to solely be going to the market, part of your responsibility as a wife to me is to cook. I also stated that when you come home, we would discuss the bill issue. So on getting home, she just walked past me into the room for a quick shower, didnt even look me in the face, coming out, the first thing she said was that i have bashed the car, that was when I asked what she was doing that is wrong bringing all the ill-luck of bashing cars everyday and then she jumped to saying i was insecured and i needed to get a life, and i said she was ugly and not worth being insecured for. I will be sincere, I was not only angry at those words, my instinct told me that woman had again cheated on me. I went to go check the car, no bash, that in turn gave me thoughts of the fact that she diverted the attention of the whole situation, what she was trying to sway attention off, i still havent gotten it.

Regarding the bill issue, i mentioned that the kids school fees remained 90k off 420k, she should go and pay the rest, and the rent remains 500k off 2 milly, she should pay the balance so we will have a better understanding that we are sharing bills, she said she aint paying shit, its like you guys dont understand m dealing with here, my kids are like the gift, she is like the curse, the kind of problem yansh can possibly put people is what i have found myself in. 7 years of unhappiness, funny thing is, if she was loyal, submissive, and respectful, i for love this woman crazy, cos shes beautiful and very sexy, but attitude is 100%=0

Belafonte:


Na you dey fúcking up na. You dey make better money one woman dey do you anyhow. Sorry, but I have not time for rubbish. You fúck up, end of marriage.

Imagine working so hard and your wife is busy sharing her pússy everywhere. She disrespects you because she knows you an do nothing. She has seen you finish. You have probably fúcked her with another man's cum still in her.

You better go and do a DNA test on your so-called children.

I already did a DNA test on them both, they are my biological children. No worries on that side. The see finish issue is what i always tell her, na the see finish make her do things that I have stood up like a man to draw a ine on never to happen but will still happen, then will expect me to take her sorry and move on immediately, when i keep the silent treatment, she comes up with i dont know how to handle issues, or i dont like to communicate, communicate wetin over and over again? The funny thing is, yesterday I had gone to a salon to request for home service for pedicure and manicure. So two ladies followed me home. Upon my entering, i told her two people are here to come and do pedi and medi for me. So i asked the house maid to boil water. Within some few seconds, she approached the ladies saying, please and please go and get the water yourself once it has finished boiling, the house maid and i are going out, in a rash tone to know she was angry, i then called her aside, and told her that was uncalled for, these people are here to work, you didnt have to lay your personal wrath on them, she was like yea but i ought to have told her before choosing to bring the ladies home for service, i was like you have always deliberated for me to bring in whoever i want to whenever you refuse to help me with my leg saying its salvery for me to ask her to do my leg. This is still in the midst of reconciliation with me, that she brought up this attitude, the see finish is extreme and it justifies the fact that I know that she can never change, the attitude is in her. Shes asking that we go for counseling, i know its just for the clout, it wont change sht, i told her to go first, i will follow, she hasnt.

genq:



Love potion seller?
Dude you've got to be trolling

trolling in what terms? Ever since i figured that out, i had to start praying over every food she serves me.

spiritedtete:



She is cheating on you 100%.... As a married man with longer years of experience.... The red flag is you ain't giving your wife a satisfactory sex...


Got get a dick Enlargement... Don't even tell her. Surprise her. Do it fast and win her back.


To her answer about women being the same... That is a big fat lie. Some women will see your average performance she didn't like as a life saver. While some will not. Interms of attitude.. No human is the same. Don't allow her manipulate you.

Learn to also keep quiet after few sentences... Don not argue with her back and fourth... You will lose your respect quickly. Learn to conserve your emotions. Let your look speak more.

The above is not our problem, we have a good sexual life, we are opened about our sexuality, thus making it easier for us to satisfy each other, besides your notion of me getting an enlargment is probably drawn from the fact that she said "your small di8ck" mind you am an average sized dickk guy, the only difference was that she had dated a guy with a plumbing tool for 2 years before we met, so it is always easier for most ladies like that to classify average size dick as small based on what they have been receiving. Infact the text message i saw which she hid between her and her love potion seller states clearly that our sex life is good, but that she just needs something for me to love her more.

ImaIma1:


But that's the truth. The OP lacks discretion and maturity even in his words. Just completely washing his dirty linens outside without no caution whatsoever.

Kindly shut the hell up, i am posting anonymously, if words arent penned down with details and out of anger, I might not be understood,whats with the washing dirty linen when nobody knows who is being talked about.

crackhaus:

I am really glad you shared this. I am glad NOT because it corroborates my comments, but because you just showed that your intuition is still very much fine-tuned.

The issue now is a simple one because it's just a case of what are you going to do at this point?
Do you want to save your marriage and get it back to a place of total peace and fidelity, or do you believe it is too far gone to be salvaged?

The reason why I deliberately ignored that whole story about how you summoned her to get back home just to cook your meal, was because that isn't the main issue.
Even though majority of the posters here chose to fixate on that bit, it was obvious to me that the only reason you would be so inconsiderate as to order her back home to serve your food, was an attempt to show you still had some kind of power over her. And when a man starts to do odd things in a bid to assert control over his wife, then the issues between them runs far deeper.

Now to the original question in your topic, the answer is NO, you can and MUST NOT tolerate all that nonsense from your wife. Her continuous threats and misbehaviour have gone on for so long because you allowed it.
Tell her that you have had quite enough of the threats and that she should pray fervently to her God for you not to find any hard evidence that she has been cheating on you, else she will find out the difference between six and half-a-dozen.

Also, you have to stop exchanging words with her or making degrading comments about her looks.

If you noticed, I have not suggested you directly accuse her of cheating or advocated any form of separation between you two.
This is because, since you have had the suspicion for so long but made no move to get any evidence, then you probably can remain married. Just caution her as I stated above.

Cheers.

I have made several move to at least see that my instincts were through, but then I found out at a time that she was already having an affair with a guy but not too sure if they have gone as far as having sex, i even created a thread here on family section about 2 years ago. She already figured out all the ways I used to track her. So i just dont bother myself any,ore

[quote author=drmikeadams post=83927772][/quote]


I saw it, we only dated for 2 weeks, pregnancy involve, i dont know much about her, but the little i have seen, i wouldnt have been able to ask for her hand in marriage. I have dated plenty,and I can categorically say shes not my type. N yansh put me for this situation, though with 2 children, am sort of stalk.

crackhaus:

Experience.

Women who are constantly threatening to cheat have already done so and are only just using the threats to deflect their husbands suspicion to the fact that it already happened.
OR
They are currently seeing another man with whom they want to have sex with but are still holding back, and making such threats during every argument/fight is only meant to make her intentions justifiable. The idea is to preemptively eliminate that guilt women always feel after the first sex act with a man other than their husbands.

The above two scenarios, is cheating.

I'm betting that if this OP finds a way to monitor her phone messages and/or social media accounts, he will find something that will prove she's not making empty threats.

Part of the major problem I have here is that, deep inside of me I know this woman must have cheated on me, I cant count the number of clues that I have seen over the last couple of years. Infact this past june, i figured out that she moved a deleted chat of she and her ex to whatsapp arvhive, and another message of this jaruma type online seller talking about how what she bought from her didnt work. Supposedly love potion. I asked why she moved message from main to archive if she didnt have something to hide, she was like the dude says alot of rubbish and she wouldnt want me to see such and start thinking otherwise. Plenty attimes, when am entering the honey pot, it feels different, feels bruised, honey pot wey i don dey knack for years, i know the feeling if its fresh and if its not. I cant even begin to count clues here, but it bothers me alot to know that she is cheating but cant find shit out. She has surpassed phone and monitoring stuffs, she upped her game and i aint trying to follow up anything as it can kill a man in no time. This is a woman where if issues arise, she wants to just say sorry and expect me to move on, after doing something very terrible, but if i aint gotten over myself in like a week, you'll start hearing stuffs like this is the kind of thing that will make give give listening hears to those that wants to listen and make her vulnerable to cheating. Thats when you'll see that she starts to change her looks, start wearing move revealing clothes out, thats probably to make me feel somehow, or otherwise. I will repeat guys, you destiny is attached to whom u marry, choose wisely.

ImaIma1:


You spoke well.

I think he is the type that feels his wife his is beneath him and he is the lord, master and king. Marriage is really not about proclaiming your position and rights or demanding slave-like submission. It should more about having consideration for your partner and working together as a team.

I agree that the first one or two years in marriage could be tough, but throwing insultive words around... that one is a personal trait and a result of character flaws. Because 4yrs and counting, "we" never utter even the basic abusive words to each other.



They need to see a counselor

You are sexist or is it a feminist or whatever they call your type. You dont see anything wrong in the woman, its always the man. Am not a domineering man neither do I see my wife as though she should be beneath me. She is just a typical modern day disrespectful type, no respect, nothing whatsoever, i wont be surprised if you fall into the same category as her. Going to a counselor is not part of my plan, as every-time we go , instead of trying to reach a solution, shes trying to make herself feel like am the cause of the problem, and shes the saint. Infact the last session showed she had more work to do per the counselors assessment, she was told to come back for more..but she never did

Richy4:
Most Marriages has passed through this kind of phase my brother. Anyone telling you that it will be rosy from start to finish is not being realistic. Getting married is easy but staying married is where the whole thing gets complicated.

Those argument to me is so origin except the part of cheating.. I have heard that line of insult about ugly and small Penis before but from much older couple that got married about 40 something yrs..

The only problem I have seen with your marriage is how to strike a balance between modern day living and traditional style of marriage. U don't know where to draw the line. U wanted a Morden marriage at the same time traditional lifestyle kinda marriage and u couldn't balance it..

U were splitting the bills bro. And she is trying to do her part to come up with her own share. So her business will do that part and running a business is time consuming and that to me is Morden.. But then, u still want her to come back home on time and do the cooking while u were at home.(traditional )

Assuming the arrangements was for her to stay @home while u provide everything, then if she was neglecting your breakfast by watching movies or painting her nails, I will have said oh! what a woman. But in this case, what she was doing was for the best interest of the family. So if I were you, I will arrange my own breakfast once in a while even lunch knowing that it's modernised style of marriage...where her contribution to the upkeep of the family is crucial/ important.

My final opinion is that don't take what she said about bringing a man home seriously. U attacked her were it hurts.. saying a woman was ugly even when she was can make a her say so many unprintable things just to get back @u.. Just to make it look like if u don't appreciate, someone else would.

So the bottom line here is to define the style of marriage that u wanted or that is suitable for you two from now on...Morden, traditional or combination of both. Then research on what you can do to make it work..

Please be informed, it was in her own words that she said we are sharing the bill, if we are sharing bills my brother. she wont be able to survive it, just small sharing here and there, she don turn am to we dey share bills, please check out my last post. I'm a software programmer, i dont have time for kitchen, not everyone can be the same, try to understand that. I have told this woman several times never to tell me that am insecure, it was not needed for her to have said that.

SirVintageCock:
Glad I have a vintage cock. . Small penis and you have the gut to whine on nairaland about it word for word

But wait oooo, if you are working from home you still need someone to gather ordinary breakfast for you?

In this modern age, the moment you Start splitting the bills then you expect anything......

In short, you guys are cohabitants...... Just draw a plan of cohabitation and get on with it....

Its actually not what u thought of iyt to be, i have heard so many damning words in the last seven 7 years, words like, am wasting her yansh, that she will give the ass to someone else. My advise to anyone single guy here, marriage is good, but be very patient before u choose a life partner, if u happen to impregnate a lady whom u know u are not compatible with, dont be forced to marry as it falls to my own kinda predicament. I am not the kitchen type, i work and work to pay the bills. now to break it down, i didnt want to type much just to make things known how it is, in a year, if i had spent 5.2 million which covers everything concerning the family, she had only spent maybe like 250k, is that sharing bill? her own definition of sharing bill is just cox we went out just last week, we both shared the bill for food and ish, and takes care of groceries once in a while, left to her she always say shes not suppose to be spending a dime after which i empowered her financially with her businesses...am a correct husband that any correct woman would rush, just a pity i have fallen into a pit that am finding hard to climb due to the love i have for mu children... life is hard with the wrong woman i must say.

Morin Nlanders,

Is it true that marriage is actually a do or die affair that whatever comes ur way u have to take it and live with it? That question is solely for the married men, and for the married ladies on here, I just wanted to know if you would react the way my wife did regarding what am about to explain, because she said all women are the same that even if i am to re-marry, that the woman will be worse off than she is, but i disagree.
The issue of tending to my food comes with a struggle at times, and being a father of two and living in lagos aint easy. She told me she was going to market to get some supplies for her clothing biz, i was like i hope u did come back soon so i can get breakfast cos i was working from home. She said she would be back before 9, lo and behold, it was already quarter past ten and she called saying shes on her way asking what i would like to eat, i was like is this the promise u made to come back early, she said well there was traffic and that i need to understand that we are sharing bills to pay equally now so I must give her the freedom is hustling per her own timing. I was like I didnt marry you to give me rules, part of the reason why u are my wife to give me food and not what ur saying, i said i have arranged breakfast she should bother. She got back, and the first thing she said is..i have bashed the car because i was rushing home to make u food, i was like i already told u before u drove off that i sorted myself, whats the rushing home to make food for me for. Then it came to my attention that she has consecutively been bashing both cars over the course of 4 days, i was pushed to ask her what she has been doing causing these sort of ill-luck bashing the cars here and there and having the other being fixed almost everyday, weird and un-unsual, she quickly termed it that i was trying to say shes cheating, that i need to get a life and stop being insecured. I was like i'm not insecured, and i cant be insecured over a woman of her looks. She got angry and said, me with my small pen**s, i was like an ugly woman like u can never make me insecured. I kept quiet but she continuously carried out her tantrums. This is coupled with the fact that somestimes last week, she made a statement out of an argument that she will have sexxx with another man in the house and i will never know of it. I was really angry and wanted to report to her dad, she cried and begged me not to, knowing fully well of the consequences that might follow. Ladies can u guys say these sort of things to your hubby out of anger? are u guys all the same?