The greatest horror for every Nigerian child is not darkness, it is that blinding light before the sharp pain.



These are the signs that shit is about to go down.

1. When your mother calls your full name.



Oh Lord!

2. When your mum would normally speak English but she switches to your local language.



Local language. Local violence.

3. When your father greets you welcome with a glowing smile.



continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/03/13-signs-that-spell-doom-for-every-nigerian-child/

At the 2015/2016 convocation ceremony of the University of Lagos, Daniel Dada Ayodele emerged baby boy of the year.



He will be graduating with not just a First Class degree in Psychology, but a 5.0 CGPA. The perfect score.

This 12 photos capture all the ways we reacted.

1. When you first hear of the 5.0 CGPA.



2 But then it is beginning to look more like a “Thank you for coming result.”




Continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/a-unilag-student-graduated-with-a-5-0-cgpa-and-this-is-how-we-reacted/

O’boy ee, see fraustration..

Like , Comment & Share !!

Man: Baby, I love you, would you please marry me?

Woman: (stands up and lands a stinging slap on his face) I have waited more than 9yrs, I have prayed, fasted, sowed seeds, bought books and listened to tapes, even went out of my way to be nice to every male specie of marriageable age!

I took up new hobbies, watching football and play station. I went to Daystar. From Daystar, I went to House on the Rock, from House on the rock I went to Guiding Light Assembly, Phronesis Christian Centre Int’l, MFM, Christ Embassy, Redeemed, From there I went to This Present Winners looking every where for you. I went from a size 14 to a size 10, so that when you see me you’d love what you see.

Continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/naija-jokes-marriage-proposal-101/

Chidinma has added Banky W to the long list of people she is winshing. They pulled off a great baby boy and girl song together. Although, we must admit that it looks like an ajebutter version of Dammy Krane’s Faleela.

The video is the normal Nigerian music video story; Guy likes lady. Lady’s parents don’t like guy. Guy comes over to impress parents. Guy wins. And they live happily ever after.



But we decided to tell our own stories with their photos, because we can.

1. When bae is texting his ‘just a friend’ at 2am.



2. When the love you have for your bae has home training.

continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/these-funny-photos-from-chidinma-and-banky-ws-all-i-want-is-you-video-tell-a-different-story/

Lolz e Quotes By Highly Placed Nigerian Leaders!

(1) “we want to thank the president for bringing facebook to Nigeria” …Information Minister Labaran Maku.

(2) “you press men, you always say there are no minerals in kano. We have Coca Cola, Fanta, Mirinda and the newly invented Sprite”…Bakin Zuwo.

(3) “Foreign investors should ignore Boko Haram απϑ invest in Nigeria”…GEJ

(4) ” I will water your school and fire your school”..Orji Uzoh Kalu.

(5) “Nigerians dont panic, terrorist attack is everywhere ..maybe is our turn”…GEJ.

(6) “I will rather kill myself than commit sucide”..Dame Jonathan.

(7) “I founded this school for the masses and ŧħҿ school fees is 850,000 naira”…Atiku Abubakar.

( Until I see someone eating out of the gutters before I believe there is poverty in Nigeria.” – Umoru Dikko.


continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/naija-jokes-lolz-quotes-by-highly-placed-nigerian-leaders/

This is being a man business can go from 0-100 real quick and to be honest, there are some parts of it that women just don’t get.

Like

1. When you have a boner in public.



That’s the only logical reason men cross their legs to be honest.

2. When you have a boner every single time.



This is probably the male equivalent of women getting their period impromptu, every single day.

3. You have it all worked out in your head when you want to pee.



I got this, I got this.

4. But you completely Bleep up in reality.





continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/every-man-everywhere-can-relate-to-these-14-struggles/

The 14th of February is a big deal, packed with many stories that run the gamut from proposals to breakups. These photos tell an interesting Valentine story.



1. When it is the 12th of February and your bae hasn’t said anything about your valentine date.



2. When your man tries to pick up a fight with you before Valentine.



You muzzbe joking.

3. Then it’s the 13th and one girl tries to snatch your boo.



Karishika fall and die!

Continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/these-11-photos-tell-a-hilarious-nigerian-valentine-story/

The 14th of February is a big deal, packed with many stories that run the gamut from proposals to breakups. These photos tell an interesting Valentine story.



1. When it is the 12th of February and your bae hasn’t said anything about your valentine date.



2. When your man tries to pick up a fight with you before Valentine.



You muzzbe joking.

3. Then it’s the 13th and one girl tries to snatch your boo.



Karishika fall and die!

Continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/these-11-photos-tell-a-hilarious-nigerian-valentine-story/

While the United Arab Emirates was electing its youngest minister, a 22-year old woman, something else was going down in Enugu State.

The chairperson of the state House Committee on Gender Affairs, Hon. Nkechi Omeje-Ogbu, a female member representing Nsukka West Constituency, sponsored a bill.

It was a bill to give equal rights to men and women in the state, so women don’t get discriminated on account of gender and maternity issues, amongst other things.

It was thrown out in the second reading.

The reason? It was un-african.



In 2016? They must be high on some cheap stuff.

It gets worse though. One Hon. Sunny Ude-Okoye. Somebody’s father. This is what he said, “I have risen to declare my stand, I have risen to take my stand that this is a colossal waste.”




Continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/we-think-enugu-state-lawmakers-are-full-of-shit-and-heres-why/

Friday evenings should be great, but this one is extra boring. Your guys are out of town. Your babe said she’s going for night vigil, and you’re just there, home alone.



Then you receive a call from one woman you’ve been ignoring since. You really are not in the mood but you still try to respect yourself.

“I’m bored, and my body is doing me one kain,” she says in that voice you know means ‘gerrovahia’.

“Okay, go and play with your husband now” you say.

And then she says, “My husband has travelled”.




Your husband has what?’



Five minutes later, she calls to ask where you are.g



Continue reading here ---- http://trendope.com/2016/02/nigerian-horror-story-nightmare-on-magun-street/

Getting your period is literally the worst 5/6 (even 7 sometimes) days of your month, and even though it brings with it the good news that you are not going to be a mummy yet (for single ladies), the cramps and unending flow of blood make you wish you were actually pregnant sometimes.

This post was supposed to be only about all the reasons getting your period isn’t actually all that bad, but instead we came up with even more reasons to hate that time of the month.


When you think your period is finally over, and then the day after your last day it pops back up like.




Or when it comes twice in one month (lay off the morning after pills sis.)
[img]http://i1.wp.com/theotherstyle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Not_this_shit_again.gif?resize=500%2C241
[/img]

When the pain level of your cramps goes up a notch or two, and it’s not even the weekend so you can’t lay curled up in bed all day.

[img]http://i1.wp.com/theotherstyle.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Amanda-Bynes-Kill-Me-Reaction-Gif.gif?resize=500%2C284
[/img]

So here’s a little fun fact about period cramps that actually helps. Taking pain killers before your period starts actually decreases your cramping, and if they are rather severe and you are sexually active, some hormonal birth control pills actually reduce the pain. Remember not to buy birth control pills over the counter without consulting your doctor.

Continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/we-have-some-good-and-bad-news-about-periods/

Football was everything for many Nigerian kids and if you loved playing, you can relate to these photos.

1. When the owner of the ball is losing and decides to take his ball home.





Diarris God.

2. When you notice the girls are watching and the inner Maradona comes alive.






This is the day that the lord has made.

3. There was always the one kid whose job it was to jump into people’s compounds and pick the ball.




Continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/14-photos-you-will-definitely-relate-to-if-you-played-football-as-a-kid/

Nine-year-old Saneie Masilela has become the world’s youngest groom for the second time after remarrying the 62-year-old woman he tied the knot with last year.

Dressed in a silvery tuxedo, baby-faced Saneie clutched the hand of mother-of-five Helen Shabangu – her children are aged between 28- and 38-years-old – as they repeated their vows a year on in front of 100 guests.The schoolboy says he did it to make the marriage ‘official’ but other villagers in Ximhungwe in Mpumalanga, South Africa describe it as “sickening”.

Continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/south-african-schoolboy-aged-nine-marries-62-year-old-woman-for-second-timethe-reason-heartmelting/

Doctors in Barcelona, Spain believe they have found the cure to HIV – the AIDS-causing virus that affects the lives of more than 34 million people worldwide, according to WHO.

By using blood transplants from the umbilical cords of individuals with a genetic resistance to HIV, Spanish medical professionals believe they can treat the virus, having proven the procedure successful with one patient.

A 37-year-old man from Barcelona, who had been infected with the HIV virus in 2009, was cured of the condition after receiving a transplant of blood.

While unfortunately the man later died from cancer just three years later, having developed lymphoma, the Spanish medical team is still hugely encouraged by what it considers to be a breakthrough in the fight against HIV and related conditions, according to the Spanish news source El Mundo.


Continue reading here http://trendope.com/2016/02/good-news-hivaids-cure-finally-found-doctors-confirm-no-more-condoms/

Ops!!! one of the world most popular social network is currently down. Not even the login page is working. This issue stated this morning by 11.02am. You just have to confirm this guy…


Source: http://trendope.com/2016/01/ops-twitter-is-currently-offline/

Ops!!! one of the world most popular social network is currently down. Not even the login page is working. This issue stated this morning by 11.02am. You just have to confirm this guy…


Source: http://trendope.com/2016/01/ops-twitter-is-currently-offline/

This is to inform all 2015 aspirants of Yaba College of Technology (YABATECH) that the names of admitted candidates into the institution for 2015/2016 session has been uploaded on JAMB website.

Candidates are to check their admission status on JAMB website now via this link:Admission Status Check

1.Type in your JAMB Reg number

2.Click on “Check Admission Status” to view your admission details.

SOurce: http://naijalatestupdate.com/index.php/2015/11/04/yabatech-admission-list-20152016-out-on-jamb-portal/

This year’s ministerial screening got everyone watching. It can be argued that never in Nigeria has so much attention been given to the ministerial screening.

In fact, this argument can be taken a little farther to say that since the pre-election period that brought this present government into power, Nigerians have gotten more active in politics – not just many Nigerians, but also the Nigerian youths.

Before now, what was obtainable was that political matters, like the nine o’clock news, were the exclusive concern of those with a little grey in their hair.

Meanwhile, the younger and, maybe stronger ones, were getting enchanted with Hollywood, Nollywood, Bollywood and all the other woods that try enough to spring up in their very fertile minds.

But change came even before the politicians promised it. One could posit that this active political participation presently found in the youths can be attributed to the power they are given by the social media. They may not sit through the whole nine o’clock news, but they could listen to the headlines to share them on their social media pages or handles and read them up from there later.

They became not just spectators but participants. The social media offered them a platform to air their unadulterated, unedited, uncensored views without fear or favor in any sense. Where what they had to say was controversial, they hid under the anonymous umbrella the social media platforms provided. Interestingly, they became not just the audience of the news but also the creators of the news – the traditional media now has to check for hash tags and trends to know the hottest news of the day.

For the ministerial screening procedures, the social media was brimming with many commentaries every step of the way. It was the youths on social media that decided that Fashola had offered intelligent answers to his questions, that Amaechi could not define corruption.

It was also the social media that clamored that when the presidency took over four months to present its first ministerial list, we expected that this soup that had taken so long to prepare would be such that we had never tasted before. You can then imagine our disappointment when it was served and we saw that it was the same ‘okporoko’ from the East, ‘pomo’ from the west and ‘nama’ from the north as we have always been used to.

We also noticed that it was possible that the media aide had given a voice to Mr. President’s thoughts that “mental age” was more important than “birth age”. For more proof, we are yet to see any plans or actions of Mr. President that directly involves the youth. That would be another discourse on a later date.

Be that as it may, the presidency and the government as a whole, must recognize that there is an ongoing birth of the fifth estate of the realm. Unlike the fourth estate, they would give their opinions, sought or unsought, of all the other estates with maybe less civility and more concern for what they think is right.

The government as a whole must learn that especially as non-political office holders, the fifth estate, being the largest of all estates, is that voice of God said to be in the voice of the people. Though they may not sit in the gallery, they would not fail to scream their nay or yay on all political matters, no matter how seemingly trivial.

The government should refer to history and be reminded that it was in their youthful age that the likes of Azikiwe, Balewa, Awolowo, Saro Wiwa and a host of others fought the early wars for a great Nigeria. From there, the government should be properly advised that where they fail to bring the over flogged change to the people, this fifth estate is prepping to bring change to them.

If it is true that no government succeeds without the support of its people, then this government must learn that it cannot succeed without giving due priority to this fifth estate. Every people get the kind of government they deserve.

This new fifth estate has decided that national decisions would no longer be screened on the ideologies of political parties but on the primary factor of their dream Nigeria. Any government that fails to recognize this would be taught that the people is the government and it is therefore guilty of treason.

Sources: http://naijalatestupdate.com/index.php/2015/11/02/the-fifth-estate-president-buhari-and-the-ministerial-screening/

Mores News Updates: @ http://www.naijalatestupdate.com