sweetshisha:




You are an introvert , no big deal.

In other to help yourself you must set a goal daily to speak with a lady or two daily, try simple lines like " excuse me, do you stay around here, I like your looks, can I have your number, can we be friends" highest she'll say No, or walk off.. but slowly you'll start getting over the sense of embarassment and start replacing it with jokes like " She no even fine sef" , "girl wey I won manage"


.

For God sake it's not beacuse he's an introvert. There are extroverts with social anxiety also. Let's stop perpetuating this falsehood. That's not what introversion is. Dude sounds like he suffers from severe social anxiety, and for some reason or the other is very "sensitive", probably even depressed too. He needs therapy, that's what he needs. It's not gonna be easy if he can't afford it, but it's possible for him to work on himself.

Facts111:
Good day everyone..

I'll be 24 next month. The problem now is that am too shy. I don't have confidence. I don't have any girlfriend (am too shy to speak to a lady). You can wrongly accuse me and i will went away crying.

I am the first born of a family of six. A man once accused me of sleeping with his wife (the woman in question senior my mama) and i was like "me ? Me ? Me ? " and I went inside crying.

The only friend i have is my phone. The thing is affecting me seriously. I can't eat in public. I can't insult. I can't even look at your face to talk anything.... I talk alot inside... Am an online keyboard wariorr..

One boy was telling me yesterday to join 'cult' to improve. Though am thinking of it. People take me for a fool. Nairaland is my best website.

Please doctors in the house, is there any drug or medication that i can take to make me overcome shyness ?...

Bro, i feel your pain, i really do. I too have suffered from severe anxiety and experience it sometimes. It's a constant battle but one you can get a hold of.

Bro, I'll say this. The starting point to recovery is to gain knowledge about your problem. Study. Know the triggers.

Learn to observe them. I mean from an objective point of view as you would if you were watching something happening. You'll begin to notice how much our behaviors are automatic responses that could be "reprogrammed"

Bro look into meditation. You can hit me up if you'd like to learn from my personal experience. Trust me, it would change your life. Stay Blessed brother

Whatever you do, don't join a cult because you want to stop being shy! Don't, please!

Facts111:
Good day everyone..

I'll be 24 next month. The problem now is that am too shy. I don't have confidence. I don't have any girlfriend (am too shy to speak to a lady). You can wrongly accuse me and i will went away crying.

I am the first born of a family of six. A man once accused me of sleeping with his wife (the woman in question senior my mama) and i was like "me ? Me ? Me ? " and I went inside crying.

The only friend i have is my phone. The thing is affecting me seriously. I can't eat in public. I can't insult. I can't even look at your face to talk anything.... I talk alot inside... Am an online keyboard wariorr..

One boy was telling me yesterday to join 'cult' to improve. Though am thinking of it. People take me for a fool. Nairaland is my best website.

Please doctors in the house, is there any drug or medication that i can take to make me overcome shyness ?...

I was once like that... Now I just flatter girls for fun.
My secret is always making a decision to do opposite of what I could have done in any situation. It works like a charm.

Facts111:
Good day everyone..

I'll be 24 next month. The problem now is that am too shy. I don't have confidence. I don't have any girlfriend (am too shy to speak to a lady). You can wrongly accuse me and i will went away crying.

I am the first born of a family of six. A man once accused me of sleeping with his wife (the woman in question senior my mama) and i was like "me ? Me ? Me ? " and I went inside crying.

The only friend i have is my phone. The thing is affecting me seriously. I can't eat in public. I can't insult. I can't even look at your face to talk anything.... I talk alot inside... Am an online keyboard wariorr..

One boy was telling me yesterday to join 'cult' to improve. Though am thinking of it. People take me for a fool. Nairaland is my best website.

Please doctors in the house, is there any drug or medication that i can take to make me overcome shyness ?...

Being an introvert is not your problem.

If you're goal oriented, dedicated and steadfast, people will gravitate towards you and you'd begin to live normal.

First, to must subdue your elemental need to recluse yourself from people and try to engage random people in vehicles, and be intelligent too.

Leave cultism, that one will bolster your chances of violent death.

Elock1:
omo na gradual process oh. I was so bad that I even feel embarrassed to write what i did here.. Lol

I'm not a pro but I just feel different people have different approaches, what worked for A might not work for B.

But first of all I started with admitting I was a modafakin jerk.

Then I started reading all this rubbish online thing way no work oh... It sounds nice but liver dy always cut

I just hard to conquer my fear and register in a social group.. A theatrics group.

Then it all started by waving at random beautiful girls... From there we dy improve dy go.

I think whatsapp go dy better Sha.

Cool.
I can now start conversations with people but I don't know how to keep it going.





I love the seas

Albertone:


Cool.
I can now start conversations with people but I don't know how to keep it going.





I love the seas

omo it's not always easy Sha.. I won't say that I can approach everyone for a random chat, but I can sustain a very long gist if I'm in the mood..

That's why I said you have to discover you first b4 knowing your approach.
Like me now I began to smile a little bit more (not the roasted goat own) I dy frown like masquerade b4 because the kind introvert pain I dy carry for body dy show for my face.

But after I started smiling more.. People come dy say wetin dem think about me b4 (say I dy resemble stubborn he goat) and dem no know weda I dy ever happy.. Dem dy call me sadist self for school b4.

I think creating a thread or whatsapp group to help shy and reserved people won't be a bad idea... We can share our experience and how to overcome and all.

Facts111

ewami:
Let me help you.
When I was in secondary school, I hardly talk and been bullied by my mates to the extent that I was lied against that I was part of a secret cult in school and expelled from
secondary school, I never spoke to defend myself .
I can't toast any girl. My padis toasted a girl and finished the work for me only for me to show up to tell the girl that I was sorry and never meant it.
My life changed the day I found purpose. Start with getting close to God and doing things meaningful. Move away from social media for now.
It won't bite if look at people in the eyes. Ask questions and try boldness. At your age YOU DON'T NEED A GIRLFRIEND. MAKE YOUR LIFE COUNT FIRST

All the best.

That is the trick of boldness, if you can hold a conversation and look at there eye ball for long then they will believe that you are not a shy person, here is another trick when looking at a person just look at the person eye at first when you see that you want to look away just look at the person forehead and look at the person eye ball again just repeat it and you will see that you will be perfec in conversation, and mind you dont look at the person eye ball for so long oo so that it does not seems weird...
You understand ?

Facts111:
Good day everyone..

I'll be 24 next month. The problem now is that am too shy. I don't have confidence. I don't have any girlfriend (am too shy to speak to a lady). You can wrongly accuse me and i will went away crying.

I am the first born of a family of six. A man once accused me of sleeping with his wife (the woman in question senior my mama) and i was like "me ? Me ? Me ? " and I went inside crying.

The only friend i have is my phone. The thing is affecting me seriously. I can't eat in public. I can't insult. I can't even look at your face to talk anything.... I talk alot inside... Am an online keyboard wariorr..

One boy was telling me yesterday to join 'cult' to improve. Though am thinking of it. People take me for a fool. Nairaland is my best website.

Please doctors in the house, is there any drug or medication that i can take to make me overcome shyness ?...

I understand your plight. I was also a very pathetic introvert as well.
I attended a boys only secondary school and it made me so shy of talking to gyals.
After gaining admission into the university, it was not until my final year that I had a GF and three left me before I even graduated.
What you'd do is to try at least get a very good male friend who would always hang out with you, go out take some bottles or shots of alcohol, then talk to any girl you meet on the way. With the highness in you rejection wouldn't be an issue. You can gradually start making females your friend, always look them in the eyes, raise your shoulders up like you're forming, it give you confidence.

Your write up shows you're very intelligent and it means you can consciously overcome your shyness if you want to.
First step
Stand in front of a full mirror, look straight into your own eyes and speak anything very accurately to yourself
Step 2 look at the same mirror and make a presentation, imagine yourself standing in front of a crowd and be very accurate, always remember to look straight into your eyes. I assure you within just 3 days you will see a sudden improvement in your self esteem and it's a key to overcoming your shyness.

You Seriously have to help yourself Mr gentle wake-up before it's too late be positive about your life you don't join cult if not you die before you know it so be prayerful and seriously work on yourself no one will do it for you so wake up a friend joined the military be he was so shy today is married with kids so do something and come off your shyness. sorryy fone is bad just managing it

Whatever you do, never accept that you are normal.

Some introverts would come here to tell you that you are okay but you're not.

Try to work on it sha. Take a job that puts you out there. Something like a teaching job, learn a musical instrument. Great people and engage in discussions that doesn't concern you from time to time.


Feelings na mumu.

iLegendd:


Thank you for the confession.

My oga...

drizzle0007:


It's difficult. People say pray and all that spiritual stuff. I would only advice you to be self aware. Be aware of what triggers it and control it. You can't stop the act directly in my opinion. You can only stop what triggers it. So if it's a thought for instance, be aware of the fact that you're having a thought that could trigger the act and try as much as possible to distract yourself from that thought. That's what I mean by being self aware and taking control. Get busy, learn to code, get a job, register in a gym. Anything that keeps you busy. Do it. You'll be fine.

I remember when I failed into masturbation..... until The Deliverer in Mount Zion arose.

What I'm trying to say is that Jesus can help him stop masturbation and train his mind on how to be more confident. But this will come in the place of fellowship with the Spirit of Christ not just by prayer.

I've been in his shoes so I know what I'm talking about

Facts111:
@ drizzle0007
Yes i forget to stated it. " i mastubate ". But finding it hard to stop.

Do not join cultism, those that joined ate wishing they were free.


Jesus can help you stop masturbation and train your mind on how to be more confident. But this will come in the place of fellowship with the Spirit of Christ not just by prayer. There's a spiritual process that takes care of this two challenges.... masturbation and timidity.

I've been into your shoes before

Nicoddemus:


Do not join cultism, those that joined ate wishing they were free.


Jesus can help you stop masturbation and train your mind on how to be more confident. But this will come in the place of fellowship with the Spirit of Christ not just by prayer. There's a spiritual process that takes care of this two challenges.... masturbation and timidity.

I've been into your shoes before

Thank you sir

studentofTruth:


It's much easier to be addicted to masturbation than sex because masturbation is easier to get than sex.

Frequent masturbation raises your dopamine levels, which, in turn, desensitizes your dopamine receptors, leading to apathy, being disinterested in others, depression, anxiety, etc.

At a time, the person may even start experiencing Parkinson-like symptoms. Here's how: dopamine receptors have dropped so low that normal-state (as against aroused state) dopamine levels cannot efficiently activate them, giving an impression of dopamine deficiency!

Masturbation kills the man in you!

In other hand, masturbation is frequent sex. Lol

Go and hustle for money first, you are actually suffering from low self esteem which is cause by poverty

Op, always be free to say what you want to say, you don't have to say it like every other person say theirs.....nothing is wrong with you.

Facts111:
Good day everyone..

I'll be 24 next month. The problem now is that am too shy. I don't have confidence. I don't have any girlfriend (am too shy to speak to a lady). You can wrongly accuse me and i will went away crying.

I am the first born of a family of six. A man once accused me of sleeping with his wife (the woman in question senior my mama) and i was like "me ? Me ? Me ? " and I went inside crying.

The only friend i have is my phone. The thing is affecting me seriously. I can't eat in public. I can't insult. I can't even look at your face to talk anything.... I talk alot inside... Am an online keyboard wariorr..

One boy was telling me yesterday to join 'cult' to improve. Though am thinking of it. People take me for a fool. Nairaland is my best website.

Please doctors in the house, is there any drug or medication that i can take to make me overcome shyness ?...

Nothing to be ashamed of bro... I was just exactly like you few years ago but I'm doing much better now.... I couldn't talk to a girl I liked nor defend myself in public when I'm innocent, not even gist with my fellow guys, I couldn't look even a single person in the eye and talk with them - even if it was a child, I'll still be shy to talk to the child... I couldn't eat in public too.... And the worse part was that I starmmer when I speak naturally even with my siblings... But now bro God has helped me... I'm doing alot better now... Just pray and ask God to help you overcome your shyness and start mingling with people even when you mess up in their presence keep doing it .. if they laugh they should laugh.. learn and move on... Because being shy will prevent you from learning so many social lessons from life... And instead of you gaining more wisdom and experience in life you will be more like a child both in mind and actions....

Elock1:
omo it's not always easy Sha.. I won't say that I can approach everyone for a random chat, but I can sustain a very long gist if I'm in the mood..

That's why I said you have to discover you first b4 knowing your approach.
Like me now I began to smile a little bit more (not the roasted goat own) I dy frown like masquerade b4 because the kind introvert pain I dy carry for body dy show for my face.

But after I started smiling more.. People come dy say wetin dem think about me b4 (say I dy resemble stubborn he goat) and dem no know weda I dy ever happy.. Dem dy call me sadist self for school b4.

I think creating a thread or whatsapp group to help shy and reserved people won't be a bad idea... We can share our experience and how to overcome and all.

The bolded seems like magic to me.I wish I can pull that off one day...I smile too.
What pains me is the way I miss greenlights.Everybody dey disturb me say I be fine boy and I'm just wasting my "fineboyness" by being too reserved!


Well, little by little,I'll improve.

drizzle0007:


It's one thing that causes severe social isolation. There's hardly an 'extreme' introvert that doesn't.

I'm also introverted tho not as tight as he's is but I don't masturbate. I can speak up for myself and stuff but I hardly talk with people..esp girls and that's a part I want to improve. Before the silence seemed to attract them more but now omo, e be like dem no even send again.

Albertone:


The bolded seems like magic to me.I wish I can pull that off one day...I smile too.
What pains me is the way I miss greenlights.Everybody dey disturb me say I be fine boy and I'm just wasting my "fineboyness" by being too reserved!

you see that fine boy thing na so them dy tell me too sometimes... But me I've even come to realize that my shyness dy protect me from some things sha

As for the magic aspect read wide like read really wide (so you won't be an otondo in the middle of a nice discussion)
Read about social ethics and the natural thing every one jives to like, sport, music, religion, politics(nairaland improve me on this Sha)

Watch some oyibo film too (I no mean jackie Chan and Bruce Lee own like English-speaking movies love etc) and when you say something try to pick you words if you dy stammer.

Me once I dy shy it's either I begin stammer or my voice go lost kpata kpata. So be careful with words so the person go know wetin u dy yarn.

Go to plazas and shopping malls etc.. Give ur sef assignment "go one random guy, tell am say he shirt make sense.. (make sure it is Sha)
Then next head to a Lady and say the same thing about her wears.

She must smile except na sadist.. But liver Sha fit cut you.. First day I try am for one Plaza.. E just be like say mk ground open swallow but me. Walai


Omo things plenty.. We no fit talk am finish 4 nairaland sha

MODIFIED: one last thing, this is wen you must love to read or watch anything Jokes ( no be all those foreign ones oh) correct jokes way be say if Naija babe hear am she fit relate. Don't be a boring niccur.

Facts111

Join clubs not cult abg�.

Elock1:


you see that fine boy thing na so them dy tell me too sometimes... But me I've even come to realize that my shyness dy protect me from some things sha

As for the magic aspect read wide like read really wide (so you won't be an otondo in the middle of a nice discussion)
Read about social ethics and the natural thing every one jives to like, sport, music, religion, politics(nairaland improve me on this Sha)

Watch some oyibo film too (I no mean jackie Chan and Bruce Lee own like English-speaking movies love etc) and when you say something try to pick you words if you dy stammer.

Me once I dy shy it's either I begin stammer or my voice go lost kpata kpata. So be careful with words so the person go know wetin u dy yarn.

Go to plazas and shopping malls etc.. Give ur sef assignment "go one random guy, tell am say he shirt make sense.. (make sure it is Sha)
Then next head to a Lady and say the same thing about her wears.

She must smile except na sadist.. But liver Sha fit cut you.. First day I try am for one Plaza.. E just be like say mk ground open swallow but me. Walai


Omo things plenty.. We no fit talk am finish 4 nairaland sha

this guy sabi work

Joelobioha:
this guy sabi work

Lol na so e be oh.. If chronic shyness timidity dy hold person you fit die of depression baba..

E better sef say you never chop than when u go house dy reason wetin ur shyness make you miss.

Me like this I for Don go extra extra far to say I been start correct am on time. But it's well.

Albertone:

Hold a boner: Can he maintain an erection or can he prevent an erection? That is what I meant.




I love the seas

i meant can he prevent

Elock1:


you see that fine boy thing na so them dy tell me too sometimes... But me I've even come to realize that my shyness dy protect me from some things sha

As for the magic aspect read wide like read really wide (so you won't be an otondo in the middle of a nice discussion)
Read about social ethics and the natural thing every one jives to like, sport, music, religion, politics(nairaland improve me on this Sha)

Watch some oyibo film too (I no mean jackie Chan and Bruce Lee own like English-speaking movies love etc) and when you say something try to pick you words if you dy stammer.

Me once I dy shy it's either I begin stammer or my voice go lost kpata kpata. So be careful with words so the person go know wetin u dy yarn.

Go to plazas and shopping malls etc.. Give ur sef assignment "go one random guy, tell am say he shirt make sense.. (make sure it is Sha)
Then next head to a Lady and say the same thing about her wears.

She must smile except na sadist.. But liver Sha fit cut you.. First day I try am for one Plaza.. E just be like say mk ground open swallow but me. Walai


Omo things plenty.. We no fit talk am finish 4 nairaland sha

MODIFIED: one last thing, this is wen you must love to read or watch anything Jokes ( no be all those foreign ones oh) correct jokes way be say if Naija babe hear am she fit relate. Don't be a boring niccur.

Facts111

Nice tips bruv.
I will try them all.

I no like to dey read
But I don dey try read now sha
Thanks




I love the seas

waploger:



i meant can he prevent

Oh I thought as much.

I love the seas

Albertone:


Nice tips bruv.
I will try them all.

I no like to dey read
But I don dey try read now sha
Thanks




I love the seas

Me sef no dy read oh.. Na YouTube be my book.. I even get about 3gb night sub bonus for YouTube alone

Fiscus105:


In fact I pity whoever who find himself or herself around u, you are completely clown. Clueless to the bone marrow

Lol...You're a deludedd being and I just laughed at your ignorance.

Off you go...