buJu234:
u re right in some way..

what about a case, where the lady is not getting younger (>28yr) and she has spent the last 2-3yrs with u..

what will u still advise the man?

Let her move on and marry someone else. You too move on, when it's time to settle down, God will give you another wife.

Never marry when you are broke.

Rubbiish:

Oga u are not married so u will not understand!
Ask married men around u!
If u don't want to eat meat, do not use your teeth to share it! If u do not want to have kids, do not get married, it is very simple! Only married people can relate! Even your wife will mock u & question if u are fertile when it gets to a point.

You're assuming Wrongly, what makes u think I'm not married, I guess you will now change your line of argument to suit u. Leave talk, plan it with your wife, no one said u should plan it alone. I Don tell u if u prefer poverty due to what society will say or not Goodluck to u

NNEWIsuper:

Babe mama is the worst sha

how?

babyfaceafrica:
True.. Its easy to say marry and delay child bearing. By the time they enter, they will know dating is different from marriage

Exactly!
I just know those of them saying that are unmarried. Ask me why are they rushing to enter marriage even when they are not financially buoyant? Because most of their mates are getting married, same will apply when they see their mates carrying their kids. If u can't stay single because of pressure, is it after marriage u will stay without kids? Your parents will finish u with talk, even mistake can come from sex as it will now be very frequent & u can't abort. Saying u won't have kids after getting marriage is like saying u will not eat meat but decide to share it with your teeth. It is more easier to stay single than to enter marriage without kids.

Rubbiish:

Oga u are not married so u will not understand!
Ask married men around u!
If u don't want to eat meat, do not use your teeth to share it! If u do not want to have kids, do not get married, it is very simple! Only married people can relate! Even your wife will mock u & question if u are fertile when it gets to a point.

Very True.. Even when she knows the financial situation of things, she go frustrate you to give her belle

babyfaceafrica:
Fact.. The notion that 'God will help u take care of kids should be disbanded' ' we are too religious and sentimental in this country... If you no get money, pause child bearing!

Pause marriage join my brother

Rubbiish:

What many of u don't know is, it is very difficult to sustain love without finance! No matter how genuine that love is! When u start failing in everything that is expected of u as a man, that love go begin dwindle, no matter how good that lady is. Any woman wey like her man, means the man is trying, he may not be very rich, but he is able to provide the basic necessities like bills, shelter, feeding, education, health. If any of these things are missing in a home, even your kids will not be happy with u, let alone your wife. In short, u will not be happy with yourself if u have conscience!

Funny enough you made so much sense here, why are u then contradicting yourself to start popping out unnecessary kids and living a perilous life

truthsayer009:


Aka let's start small, let's start small. Women always shouting they can manage are only doing it because of their biological clock. The moment you marry her and your finances are not in order. You will regret it.

Every woman I meet, first question is when are we getting married.

My Sister, the question should be what are we going to eat in the marriage.

Lmao

FreeIgboho:


NNIsuper, listen to experience.
Also, dating someone does not involve wedding ceremonies and pride prices and aseobi and inlaws and visitors, and various expectations. etc.

What the guy said made no sense. For one you're living your life for yourself and not the society, explain to me how it makes sense to start popping out kids in poverty bc the society expects you to do so, meanwhile they won't partake in your suffering. Make una open una eyes and stop suffering yourselves

Rubbiish:

Exactly!
I just know those of them saying that are unmarried. Ask me why are they rushing to enter marriage even when they are not financially buoyant? Because most of their mates are getting married, same will apply when they see their mates carrying their kids. If u can't stay single because of pressure, is it after marriage u will stay without kids? Your parents will finish u with talk, even mistake can come from sex as it will now be very frequent & u can't abort. Saying u won't have kids after getting marriage is like saying u will not eat meat but decide to share it with your teeth. It is more easier to stay single than to enter marriage without kids.

Very True.. Even your wife will not let you rest

This is very correct!
I must take this

NNEWIsuper:

What the guy said made no sense. [b]For one you're living your life for yourself and not the society, [/b]explain to me how it makes sense to start popping out kids in poverty bc the society expects you to do so, meanwhile they won't partake in your suffering. Make una open una eyes and stop suffering yourselves

This should be the normal, but it isn't reality in Africa. Society always rears its head

NNEWIsuper:

You're assuming Wrongly, what makes u think I'm not married, I guess you will now change your line of argument to suit u. Leave talk, plan it with your wife, no one said u should plan it alone. I Don tell u if u prefer poverty due to what society will say or not Goodluck to u

U are not married!!!
No married man will spend more than 6 months in marriage & his wife will not start pestering him for kids in this part of the world! Someone that is unable to stay single even when he is not financially buoyant because he sees her mate getting married, is it in marriage when she sees her mate carrying their kids she will stay without kids? Family will use talk to finish your life & u will begin to doubt your fertility.

babyfaceafrica:
True.. Its easy to say marry and delay child bearing. By the time they enter, they will know dating is different from marriage

Tell me exactly why you can't delay child bearing. Did any god ask you for a child for sacrifice?
Are there no contraceptive? Why make your life miserable for no just reason. Just set your priorities right.

Rubbiish:

U are not married!!!
No married man will spend more than 6 months in marriage & [b]his wife will not start pestering him for kids in this part of the world! [/b]Someone that is unable to stay single even when he is not financially buoyant because he sees her mate getting married, is it in marriage when she sees her mate carrying their kids she will stay without kids? Family will use talk to finish your life & u will begin to doubt your fertility.

Fact!!

NNEWIsuper:

[b]Tell me exactly why you can't delay child bearing. [/b]Did any god ask you for a child for sacrifice?
Are there no contraceptive? Why make your life miserable for no just reason. Just set your priorities right.

In this part of the world, the decision pass you especially if you are the only Son. My brother, your family and wife won't let you rest

24brains:
you that is saying you dont need money to get married, have you seen a marriage list before? Abi na belle you give your wife?

People get married to have children. So why get married at all if the aim is to take contraceptives & waiting till money comes to raise children?

Oga hustle hard, make money before thinking of women at all. They are the WOES of man

The part I rightfully marked out is false. People marry for different reasons and giving birth is just a part. Besides most Whites even just marry without aim of having kids including some Africans. We're explaining to you how to reduce or avoid suffering in marriage by delaying the time of giving birth so far you're all still fertile and healthy so you don't suffer much. Do you guys so much like suffering over your sanity? Nawa o

babyfaceafrica:
Very True.. Even your wife will not let you rest

God bless u!
My friend who got married in April this year had this kind of arrangement with his wife, i told them it wasn't going to work. I am even with him as I am typing this & we are just laughing at those saying stay without kids after marriage. Just less than 2 months around june his wife told him they should go for fertility test, my guy was shocked! This was a girl who said no kids after marriage & now she is pregnant. Lol

babyfaceafrica:
Fact.. The notion that 'God will help u take care of kids should be disbanded' ' we are too religious and sentimental in this country... If you no get money, pause child bearing!

The emboldened is same thing I'm saying naw

babyfaceafrica:
In this part of the world, the decision pass you especially if you are the only Son. My brother, your family and wife won't let you rest

Forget that nonsense, it depends on whom you are. Nothing pass you, nobody give money to marry. What tribe are you exactly where the village people demand for babes, nawa o

Person never get money or get small money, you won go carry women out for house

Pochettino:
We women were created to bring down men & destroy their destinies.
I wonder why men don't know this yet.

You sure say u be Woman.

FriendsAndFans:

The answer to your question is obvious.
Money is a tool to control, a wife will hardly want to disrespect you when she knows you hold a value of control over her needs

".....will hardly want to disrespect you when she knows you hold a value of control over her needs" now that shouldn't be a reason why she shouldn't disrespect you. If my wife doesn't disrespect me, I don't want it to be because I have control over her needs as I will feel she's keeping up the act. Sounds silly though, but it makes sense if you think about it

Rubbiish:

[s] U are not married!!!
No married man will spend more than 6 months in marriage & his wife will not start pestering him for kids in this part of the world[/s] ! Someone that is unable to stay single even when he is not financially buoyant because he sees her mate getting married, is it in marriage when she sees her mate carrying their kids she will stay without kids? Family will use talk to finish your life & u will begin to doubt your fertility.

Again you judged from the poor and miserable population you know and for you to say I'm not married without even knowing the reality makes everything you've been saying void. I have colleagues who delayed conception till they made arrangements for the babe financially. I guess you're very much low on the social class and that's what happens amongst you all. Continue to swim in your poverty and miserable lives.

babyfaceafrica:
This should be the normal, but it isn't reality in Africa. Society always rears its head

It's the reality, it more depends on your tribe and how you want to suit yourself and if you prefer poverty over what the society says of course

babyfaceafrica:
how?

I have few friends with babe mama, most them their babe mamas no de take good care of their kids and mostly into drugs and other vices which a child should not be brought up from. To me instead of a babe mama I won't think of having a kid

Rubbiish:

[s] Oga u are not married so u will not understand!
Ask married men around u![/s]
If u don't want to eat meat, do not use your teeth to share it! If u do not want to have kids, do not get married, it is very simple! Only married people can relate! Even your wife will mock u & question if u are fertile when it gets to a point.

What's your tribe first let it not be I'm arguing with someone whom I have no cultural similarity with.
And again you lied about me not been married and that invalidates all you've said already. Enjoy your suffering in peace

babyfaceafrica:
In this part of the world, the decision pass you especially if you are the only Son. My brother, your family and wife won't let you rest

How did u arrive at ur conclusion above? If d man in question isn't d only son, what then happens? Since u are relating d "predicament" of an only son, how many married men fall into d category of only sons and how many don't?

lexy2014:


How did u arrive at ur conclusion above? If d man in question isn't d only son, what then happens? Since u are relating d "predicament" of an only son, how many married men fall into d category of only sons and how many don't?

I have told you that guy probably have multiple kids he can't take care of and wants people who will join him in his miserable life. I can detect frustration in his tone and bad choices he has made and now wants to blame the society for his failures. Do not fall for that.

Klass99:


Lol, enjoy.

I stopped reading at Page 1, because I know how the thread will go........

There'll be two factions and comments will be divided along the lines of practicality (or sensibility if you like) and religiousity.

Or am I wrong? As you have followed the thread, tell me if I'm right or wrong.

What makes a thread lively is simply what you stated. Without contrary opinions then it is worthless and time wasting to have same views.

NNEWIsuper:

I have told you that guy probably have multiple kids he can't take care of and wants people who will join him in his miserable life. I can detect frustration in his tone and bad choices he has made and now wants to blame the society for his failures. Do not fall for that.

Seems u mistaken me for someone else