Good morning happy people of nairaland.

I will try to be brief as possible. During the lock down my elder brother was seriously ill, we all thought it normal malaria and typhoid but getting to the hospital he was diagnosed of kidney diseases at it last stage (CKD). We all brace up and gave him all the support needed during the stage from one dialysis section to another something thrice a week.

It became worse and no improvement at sight, I literally do all thing for him, from bathing to feeding and carry him around the hospital but he faith he will come out of it. During the process he used all of his life saving to the extend of collecting and seeking financial assistance from people because the doctor advice to undergo kidney transplants.

On 2 April 2021 we went from dialysis, nurses were complaining that I allow him to drink a lot of water because at that stage he have a daily water intake and also needed blood. He did the blood transfusion and the dialysis but he had a breathing issue, the nurse place him on breathing machine the oxygen got exhausted and he was normal.

We went home by 12am, on getting home we ask for water, I told him to wait because I can even hear noise of water around his thoracic cavity. He was having difficult I had to call one of his friend so that we can take him back to the hospital but he gave up the ghost and we bury him that the same day because that was his wish. Due to his name, I was confused and angry at myself and everyone that we lost him due to 5 million needed for the transplant.

Months later I was able to get over his death a bit and went back to school, wrote the exam and graduated with first class even though the examination I didn't prepared much due to what happened. It was just God hand at work ( It only a fool that say there is no God).

Now the problem is that I can't sleep and remember my brother death that I should have done more. His death is like 5 months from now but it still fresh in my memory recently. My brother play a vital role in my education from paying my fee and monthly allowance and advice. I was thinking of using drugs so that I can sleep at time but talk me out of it. Pls how can I re again myself and also am an introvert I don't have people to talk to and I hardly go out.

There are some scars that will never heal no matter how much you try I'm sorry for your loose... Seems to be you have a sleeping disorder because of your trauma maybe you should visit a doctor or a therapist if you financially stable but if you are not then, do this instead of trying hard to sleep why dont you do the opposite by staying awake remove the thought of not being able to sleep and replace I don't want to sleep you will be shock about the result.... I came across this technique in a book may be it might work for, maybe not and finally don't take a sleeping pills cuz it not worth it....

joshawesome:
Good morning happy people of nairaland. I will try to be brief as possible. During the lock down my elder brother was seriously ill, we all thought it normal malaria and typhoid but getting to the hospital he was diagnosed of kidney diseases at it last stage(CKD).we all brace up and gave him all the support needed during the stage from one dialysis section to another something thrice a week. It became worse and no improvement at sight, I literally do all thing for him, from bathing to feeding and carry him around the hospital but he faith he will come out of it. During the process he used all of his life saving to the extend of collecting and seeking financial assistance from people because the doctor advice to undergo kidney transplants. On 2 April 2021 we went from dialysis, nurses were complaining that I allow him to drink a lot of water because at that stage he have a daily water intake and also needed blood. He did the blood transfusion and the dialysis but he had a breathing issue, the nurse place him on breathing machine the oxygen got exhausted and he was normal. We went home by 12am, on getting home we ask for water, I told him to wait because I can even hear noise of water around his thoracic cavity. He was having difficult I had to call one of his friend so that we can take him back to the hospital but he gave up the ghost and we bury him that the same day because that was his wish. Due to his name , I was confused and angry at myself and everyone that we lost him due to 5 million needed for the transplant. Months later I was able to get over his death a bit and went back to school,wrote the exam and graduated with first class even though the examination I didn't prepared much due to what happened. It was just God hand at work ( It only a fool that say there is no God). Now the problem is that I can't sleep and remember my brother death that I should have done more. His death is like 5 month from now but it still fresh in my memory recently. My brother play a vital role in my education from paying my fee and monthly allowance and advice. I was thinking of using drugs so that I can sleep at time but talk me out of it. Pls how can I re again myself and also am an introvert I don't have
people to talk to and I hardly go out

Sorry about your ordeal..may the soul of your brother rest in peace. Don't force it, 5 months is not too far, with time you will get over it. I had a similar feeling for many years when my sister passed on. It is normal especially for a close relative whom you have great bonding with..

Amen

Skyfornia:


Sorry about your ordeal..may the soul of your brother rest in peace

You might be having depression and anxiety . So try and see a psychiatrist.

One solution to your sleepless nights is that you should be going out and mingling with people...Feel free to discuss with them....

No matter how many sleep enhancement drugs you'll take, they'll never work on you so long you've got no peace of mind on inside of you..

come on,how many years person even get to live when he go dey deprive himself of the little package of happiness wey life get for am?

Las las op, drink up......your bro is gone and there's no amount of sleepless nights you'll subject yourself to that can ever bring him back.. Instead you'll just end up breaking yourself down.....we ain't gonna get out of this life alive...
Myself,I've lost my mum as well as siblings too,but wetin guyman go do.. NOTHING, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING...But life goes on..

Rip to him.......

Thank very much how do pass through that stage. I even stay at his house everything just keep on reminding me of him. Something I felt the world was wicked, five million to save a life but no one helped but they are those that spent that amount at a blink of eye well I remember his word no one hold u anything

Skyfornia:


Sorry about your ordeal..may the soul of your brother rest in peace. Don't force it, 5 months is not too far, with time you will get over it. I had a similar feeling for many years when my sister passed on. It is normal especially for a close relative whom you have great bonding with..

Thanks

Brunosamel:
There are some scars that will never heal no matter how much you try I'm sorry for your loose... Seems to be you have a sleeping disorder because of your trauma maybe you should visit a doctor or a therapist if you financially stable but if you are not then, do this instead of trying hard to sleep why dont you do the opposite by staying awake remove the thought of not being able to sleep and replace I don't want to sleep you will be shock about the result.... I came across this technique in a book may be it might work for, maybe not and finally don't take a sleeping pills cuz it not worth it....

joshawesome:
Good morning happy people of nairaland. I will try to be brief as possible. During the lock down my elder brother was seriously ill, we all thought it normal malaria and typhoid but getting to the hospital he was diagnosed of kidney diseases at it last stage(CKD).we all brace up and gave him all the support needed during the stage from one dialysis section to another something thrice a week. It became worse and no improvement at sight, I literally do all thing for him, from bathing to feeding and carry him around the hospital but he faith he will come out of it. During the process he used all of his life saving to the extend of collecting and seeking financial assistance from people because the doctor advice to undergo kidney transplants. On 2 April 2021 we went from dialysis, nurses were complaining that I allow him to drink a lot of water because at that stage he have a daily water intake and also needed blood. He did the blood transfusion and the dialysis but he had a breathing issue, the nurse place him on breathing machine the oxygen got exhausted and he was normal. We went home by 12am, on getting home we ask for water, I told him to wait because I can even hear noise of water around his thoracic cavity. He was having difficult I had to call one of his friend so that we can take him back to the hospital but he gave up the ghost and we bury him that the same day because that was his wish. Due to his name , I was confused and angry at myself and everyone that we lost him due to 5 million needed for the transplant. Months later I was able to get over his death a bit and went back to school,wrote the exam and graduated with first class even though the examination I didn't prepared much due to what happened. It was just God hand at work ( It only a fool that say there is no God). Now the problem is that I can't sleep and remember my brother death that I should have done more. His death is like 5 month from now but it still fresh in my memory recently. My brother play a vital role in my education from paying my fee and monthly allowance and advice. I was thinking of using drugs so that I can sleep at time but talk me out of it. Pls how can I re again myself and also am an introvert I don't have people to talk to and I hardly go out

R.I.P to your brother. He took upon himself the responsibility of a father to have sponsored your education. From your write up, you also tried your best to make sure he's alive.

Guilt like this might come after losing loved one, you just have to keep reassuring yourself you loved him and tried your human best to keep him alive. Everything would be fine with time and you'll get back to normal.

Try to look for different fun activities to distract and fill your time as you're an introvert.

Don't go to bed too early, occupy yourself with productive tasks. When you're fully occupied to a good point till late, at a point sleep itself will come naturally. But if you're idle, then sleep may be hard. Everyone wants to sleep after a busy day.
If you're very busy and occupied during the day. You'll beg for night to come fast so you can sleep.

The more your trying the remove your mind from thinking about him

The most you will think about him.

Use that time of the night to start learning how to bomb clients

E go help you

Thanks for the advice and only engaged in legal things

Homeboiy:
The more your trying the remove your mind from thinking about him

The most you will think about him.

Use that time of the night to start learning how to bomb clients

E go help you

joshawesome:
Thanks for the advice and only engaged in legal things

Did I ask you to do illegal things?

Point it out

Thanks well I do play football but recently lost passion for the game

Gratefulheart1:


R.I.P to your brother. He took upon himself the responsibility of a father to have sponsored your education. From your write up, you also tried your best to make sure he's alive.

Guilt like this might come after losing loved one, you just have to keep reassuring yourself you loved him and tried your human best to keep him alive. Everything would be fine with time and you'll get back to normal.

Try to look for different fun activities to distract and fill your time as you're an introvert.

Don't go to bed too early, occupy yourself with productive tasks. When you're fully occupied to a good point till late, at a point sleep itself will come naturally. But if you're idle, then sleep may be hard. Everyone wants to sleep after a busy day.

Sorry if u misunderstood me like bombing of Clint. I can't caused pain to others just to make myself happy. Once again thanks

Homeboiy:


Did I ask you to do illegal things?

Point it out

joshawesome:
Sorry if u misunderstood me like bombing of Clint. I can't caused pain to others just to make myself happy. Once again thanks

Bombing of clients may mean that you should search for business connect here in Nigeria

Clients no mean say na oyibo

Thanks for the advice and I easily get tried of thing

Gratefulheart1:


R.I.P to your brother. He took upon himself the responsibility of a father to have sponsored your education. From your write up, you also tried your best to make sure he's alive.

Guilt like this might come after losing loved one, you just have to keep reassuring yourself you loved him and tried your human best to keep him alive. Everything would be fine with time and you'll get back to normal.

Try to look for different fun activities to distract and fill your time as you're an introvert.

Don't go to bed too early, occupy yourself with productive tasks. When you're fully occupied to a good point till late, at a point sleep itself will come naturally. But if you're idle, then sleep may be hard. Everyone wants to sleep after a busy day.

Don't even think of using drugs cos you'll get entangled to that shit.

joshawesome:
Thanks well I do play football but recently lost passion for the game

I'm not talking about playing and wasting your time on football. I'm talking about something productive.

Your brother breadwinner is gone, you should be thinking about how to make money and support yourself and your family.

If you're first class graduate, you should be thinking and working towards scholarships for your PD abroad.

If you're still a first class undergrad, you should be working towards side hustle to make money.

One way or the other, you're obligated to get yourself occupied with productive things.

Only a lazy person is idle which in turn causes inability to sleep. If you're too busy and stressed during the day, you will beg for night to come on time so you can sleep.

Op venture into something challenging.

joshawesome:
.

Don’t use drugs or alcohol, you might start developing dependence.

Spend the time reading your bible and praying.

Here's a cliche for you: "learn a skill"

It will take your mind off things and keep you occupied.

Sorry for your loss, may his soul rest in peace.

joshawesome:
Good morning happy people of nairaland. I will try to be brief as possible. During the lock down my elder brother was seriously ill, we all thought it normal malaria and typhoid but getting to the hospital he was diagnosed of kidney diseases at it last stage(CKD).we all brace up and gave him all the support needed during the stage from one dialysis section to another something thrice a week. It became worse and no improvement at sight, I literally do all thing for him, from bathing to feeding and carry him around the hospital but he faith he will come out of it. During the process he used all of his life saving to the extend of collecting and seeking financial assistance from people because the doctor advice to undergo kidney transplants. On 2 April 2021 we went from dialysis, nurses were complaining that I allow him to drink a lot of water because at that stage he have a daily water intake and also needed blood. He did the blood transfusion and the dialysis but he had a breathing issue, the nurse place him on breathing machine the oxygen got exhausted and he was normal. We went home by 12am, on getting home we ask for water, I told him to wait because I can even hear noise of water around his thoracic cavity. He was having difficult I had to call one of his friend so that we can take him back to the hospital but he gave up the ghost and we bury him that the same day because that was his wish. Due to his name , I was confused and angry at myself and everyone that we lost him due to 5 million needed for the transplant. Months later I was able to get over his death a bit and went back to school,wrote the exam and graduated with first class even though the examination I didn't prepared much due to what happened. It was just God hand at work ( It only a fool that say there is no God). Now the problem is that I can't sleep and remember my brother death that I should have done more. His death is like 5 month from now but it still fresh in my memory recently. My brother play a vital role in my education from paying my fee and monthly allowance and advice. I was thinking of using drugs so that I can sleep at time but talk me out of it. Pls how can I re again myself and also am an introvert I don't have people to talk to and I hardly go out

GO TO ANY ABOKI SHOP WEY DEY SELL CIGARETTES AND BUY SWINOL OR 542, THANK ME LATER

joshawesome:
Good morning happy people of nairaland. I will try to be brief as possible. During the lock down my elder brother was seriously ill, we all thought it normal malaria and typhoid but getting to the hospital he was diagnosed of kidney diseases at it last stage(CKD).we all brace up and gave him all the support needed during the stage from one dialysis section to another something thrice a week. It became worse and no improvement at sight, I literally do all thing for him, from bathing to feeding and carry him around the hospital but he faith he will come out of it. During the process he used all of his life saving to the extend of collecting and seeking financial assistance from people because the doctor advice to undergo kidney transplants. On 2 April 2021 we went from dialysis, nurses were complaining that I allow him to drink a lot of water because at that stage he have a daily water intake and also needed blood. He did the blood transfusion and the dialysis but he had a breathing issue, the nurse place him on breathing machine the oxygen got exhausted and he was normal. We went home by 12am, on getting home we ask for water, I told him to wait because I can even hear noise of water around his thoracic cavity. He was having difficult I had to call one of his friend so that we can take him back to the hospital but he gave up the ghost and we bury him that the same day because that was his wish. Due to his name , I was confused and angry at myself and everyone that we lost him due to 5 million needed for the transplant. Months later I was able to get over his death a bit and went back to school,wrote the exam and graduated with first class even though the examination I didn't prepared much due to what happened. It was just God hand at work ( It only a fool that say there is no God). Now the problem is that I can't sleep and remember my brother death that I should have done more. His death is like 5 month from now but it still fresh in my memory recently. My brother play a vital role in my education from paying my fee and monthly allowance and advice. I was thinking of using drugs so that I can sleep at time but talk me out of it. Pls how can I re again myself and also am an introvert I don't have people to talk to and I hardly go out

Bro...message Hziyech sir...she date any ting((THaNK ME LATER)

So sorry about your brother but whenever you finding it difficult to sleep just play a movie no loud the volume too much oo and drink milk, it works like magic

Swinol what what does it do and I hope it won't cause any health problem

OBALOLA55:
GO TO ANY ABOKI SHOP WEY DEY SELL CIGARETTES AND BUY SWINOL OR 542, THANK ME LATER

joshawesome:
Swinol what what does it do and I hope it won't cause any health problem

IT WILL RELAX YOUR NERVES AND MAKE YOU TO SLEEP LIKE A BABY IN THE NIGHT.


-SLEEP WELL
-CURE PAIN
-ANTI-INFLAMMATION


NOTE: IT DOES NOT CONTAIN ANY DECLOFENAC


I’M A LIVING WITNESS BRUH.

Look up music that can make you sleep, that should help you

Sorry for your loss.

It's a phase, it will surely pass.

Lock yourself in and cry if u must.

U will be fine.

joshawesome:
Good morning happy people of nairaland. I will try to be brief as possible. During the lock down my elder brother was seriously ill, we all thought it normal malaria and typhoid but getting to the hospital he was diagnosed of kidney diseases at it last stage(CKD).we all brace up and gave him all the support needed during the stage from one dialysis section to another something thrice a week. It became worse and no improvement at sight, I literally do all thing for him, from bathing to feeding and carry him around the hospital but he faith he will come out of it. During the process he used all of his life saving to the extend of collecting and seeking financial assistance from people because the doctor advice to undergo kidney transplants. On 2 April 2021 we went from dialysis, nurses were complaining that I allow him to drink a lot of water because at that stage he have a daily water intake and also needed blood. He did the blood transfusion and the dialysis but he had a breathing issue, the nurse place him on breathing machine the oxygen got exhausted and he was normal. We went home by 12am, on getting home we ask for water, I told him to wait because I can even hear noise of water around his thoracic cavity. He was having difficult I had to call one of his friend so that we can take him back to the hospital but he gave up the ghost and we bury him that the same day because that was his wish. Due to his name , I was confused and angry at myself and everyone that we lost him due to 5 million needed for the transplant. Months later I was able to get over his death a bit and went back to school,wrote the exam and graduated with first class even though the examination I didn't prepared much due to what happened. It was just God hand at work ( It only a fool that say there is no God). Now the problem is that I can't sleep and remember my brother death that I should have done more. His death is like 5 month from now but it still fresh in my memory recently. My brother play a vital role in my education from paying my fee and monthly allowance and advice. I was thinking of using drugs so that I can sleep at time but talk me out of it. Pls how can I re again myself and also am an introvert I don't have people to talk to and I hardly go out

So sorry about your loss.

Whatever you do, please do not take any substance to induce sleep otherwise you will become addicted to and completely dependent on it .

However, check this out :

Psalm 127:2 KJV
It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep.

Blessings!

My Guy, you are suffering from PTSD. Post traumatic stress disorder... I for say make you see a Psychologist but you they naija....3 advice wey I fit give....1. Read and research about PTSD.. 2..Allow time to heal the wound.... Engage in something very tiring and stressful during the day, so when you come back at night you will be very tired that ur body will do the needful. Thank me later

joshawesome:
Good morning happy people of nairaland. I will try to be brief as possible. During the lock down my elder brother was seriously ill, we all thought it normal malaria and typhoid but getting to the hospital he was diagnosed of kidney diseases at it last stage(CKD).we all brace up and gave him all the support needed during the stage from one dialysis section to another something thrice a week. It became worse and no improvement at sight, I literally do all thing for him, from bathing to feeding and carry him around the hospital but he faith he will come out of it. During the process he used all of his life saving to the extend of collecting and seeking financial assistance from people because the doctor advice to undergo kidney transplants. On 2 April 2021 we went from dialysis, nurses were complaining that I allow him to drink a lot of water because at that stage he have a daily water intake and also needed blood. He did the blood transfusion and the dialysis but he had a breathing issue, the nurse place him on breathing machine the oxygen got exhausted and he was normal. We went home by 12am, on getting home we ask for water, I told him to wait because I can even hear noise of water around his thoracic cavity. He was having difficult I had to call one of his friend so that we can take him back to the hospital but he gave up the ghost and we bury him that the same day because that was his wish. Due to his name , I was confused and angry at myself and everyone that we lost him due to 5 million needed for the transplant. Months later I was able to get over his death a bit and went back to school,wrote the exam and graduated with first class even though the examination I didn't prepared much due to what happened. It was just God hand at work ( It only a fool that say there is no God). Now the problem is that I can't sleep and remember my brother death that I should have done more. His death is like 5 month from now but it still fresh in my memory recently. My brother play a vital role in my education from paying my fee and monthly allowance and advice. I was thinking of using drugs so that I can sleep at time but talk me out of it. Pls how can I re again myself and also am an introvert I don't have people to talk to and I hardly go out

If sleeping is hard for you then do the opposite of sleeping ''try being awake''. It might sound weird but it works like magic, I personally its been almost 3 years I went to bed with intention to sleep, just like people say I want to sleep and next thing they are snoring. I work online and mostly pray to stay awake till morning, now here is the twist, I will be working on my tablet from 10pm to around 2pm and voom I will wake up in the morning with my tablet on my chest. So I battle sleep but what I need is sleep . What do you do for a living? Can you be a freelancer? You need something that will create a conflicting goal with sleeping at night not drugs.