Osobi32:
Nothing in this world is worth the stress and I will never allow any woman to stress me. Despite the stress men go through and the sacrifices they make on daily basis to make ends meet and to provide for the family, it will shock u to know that ur children will always choose their mother over u. The thought of this alone dey pain me! I came across a post on Facebook two days ago where a guy said he had 500k to share btwn his parent and that he need an advice on how to share the money...... I was surprised at the response I saw. 95% of the comments was for him to give his mom 450k and give the father 50k. Honestly I dropped tears

jojothaiv:
Going through this thread will make you understand why Wale 'It's Complicated' is really complicated.

WinningEleven:

You dont just come, copy and paste links and tell me you have brought proof. do you even know what a citation is

Outline the statement(s) and paragraph(s) supporting your earlier claims, telling me the exact links and page number on the research paper. This is just so lazy from your part. If it were a professpr that asked you to do what i asked of you now, you would carryover that course, no questions asked

drimzsmoke:


Lolz,I read your other post so I'm guessing you're married,might be wrong though ...Before woman empowerment and female education,life didn't favour women either.They go to farm with our fathers,tilled the soil while pregnant,came home to cook,wash clothes and slept with our fathers when they wanted it,and our fathers kept quite a number of them(wives) then.Even in the bible,this is the same role given to women,they were at the receiving end before now....Now we are in the new age,women have evolved to the new world,men are finding it hard to cope with it
Common sense dictates I carry my woman's bag when leaving the house together
Common sense dictates I'm with her in the kitchen while cooking and assist with grating of the pepper and seiving the rice to pour inside warmer while she makes the stew
Common sense dictates you allow her hold the remote and change TV station in case of raining day
Common sense dictates I do the laundry while she go spread on the line or vice versa
Common sense dictates I follow her to the market,waits and carry whatever she is pricing/buying
Common sense dictates I carry baby and change diaper while she's washing baby's clothes or EVEN some nights when she's too tired to get up
Common sense dictates I stimulate her clitoris with whatever to make her cum and then insert my penis and do my own ejaculation afterwards
Common sense dictates we bring our resources together
I'm tired to keep on typing....there's a whole lot of common sense blah blah blah jare

With all these I've typed,some will think I'm a sissy, ...if I'm "paraing",as in,ti ba decide lati para or if I decide to change it for her,na on top her knees she go dey cry dey beg me

Blessiing:










I will never choose my mother over my father because honestly that man has spent all his life trying to give me the best, he has been my confidant, my mentor, my advicer, my best. Friend and everything.... I dont care what anyone says but before i give my mum anything, my father would have gotten his first, i see all his struggles, silent tears and jist praying for God to bless me to fufill all my promises to him..

Pataricatering:
Demanding your husband comes home after 8 pm is being ungrateful? Instead she should let him keep driving till 2 or 3 in the morning ?.even uber tries to limit the number of hours drivers drive just to reduce their stress- so a wife trying to reduce her husband's hours is being ungrateful ? Its better for your wife's not to talk in the house because any thing a woman utters seems to be either a challenge to your manhood or nagging - even if its for your own good .

revcompaty:


So saddening.....
Have you ever pause to realize how many times mother's day is being celebrated in a year compared to father's day?

denobaba:
I wish you luck, bro. Sail thee well, may common sense be there for you
when the storms come hitting. Enjoy!

hedonido:
That's why it's very painful when I see well to do or even very rich men who have been mumufied by their 'dependant' wife or girlfriend who herself is from a broke background.

The least a guy can do for himself when he is expected to bear all the financial pressure in the union (whether he's dealing with a wife, girlfriend, fling or olosho) is to assert and exert his utter masculine dominance, almost to a stupendous/dictatorial/uncompromising extent. There's no nice way to say this.

Taywon:
I lost my dad last year (age 62) as a result of sickness ... A very hard working man (an accountant).... His whole body system shut down .... Am still not happy about his departure.

This was a man i had great plans for.


Same here bro. Reason why God create them while we sleep still baffle me. They are the cause of most men's death. This world would have been better without them.

murphyibiam15:
I'm trying to encourage our men here to take good care of their health, physically and mentally.

It's not like women don't have theirs but those of the men are very much noticeable in the sense that it takes a toll on their physical and mental health.

(1) I entered lagos two weeks ago and I needed to take uber, this uber driver as I can guess will be bw his 50s and 60s.He needed to send money to his wife (3k)but somehow he couldn't do transfer since he was driving me but I helped him with my bank app while he gave me cash. Do you know after transferring the money his wife was ungrateful and demanded he returns home immediately (that was around 8pm).Now,the man started complaining to me how whether he brings money or not how his wife keeps complaining and he said he's pitying Nigerian men who are getting married to strange women and giving birth without knowing what they're going into. He looked stressed out and trying to make ends meet but yet his wife added more burden, not just financially but mentally. So tell me how this kind of stressed man won't die out so sooner than later. He was lucky somehow that one of his children got a scholarship to study in India.

(2) I attended a friend's wedding and to my utmost shock both fathers of the celebrants are late. Only their moms are still alive while other relatives represented their fathers. So I was wondering how their moms are still alive while their fathers are late.
Some may say men marry younger women that's why they die out but from the mothers of those celebrants they're not up to 60 years, so how much age difference that will make the two men be late?

Im saying this because I have noticed lots of people esp men are passing through a lot of stress, please men don't allow your wives, siblings or anything infact to overstress you to the point of dying out in time. We men aren't super beings, try to take things easy.

Just my 2cents, bye.

cbrezy:


I'm really scared my dad is heading to 70's and my mum is the type that never contributed in our life financially but she's also ungrateful if my dad give her money and she's always complaining that my dad should complete our house in the village when she know that things are not going well for him, and my dad lose his first born son in 2018 from a strange health condition or attack and my dad was even scammed by spiritualist and even people who called their self Pastors and this has been hurting my dad but my mum keep pressuring him.

Lush100:
.
I will give my dad 270 and my mum 230.
I still love my mum more, but I appreciate my dad better now.
The only issue is it is my mum that can still be going to the bank.
Her strength is 101%

murphyibiam15:

Is that the only thing you picked up? The woman didn't appreciate the money since it wasn't much and yet wanted to cut short the time he has to hustle, please try to understand very well

Taywon:
I lost my dad last year (age 62) as a result of sickness ... A very hard working man (an accountant).... His whole body system shut down .... Am still not happy about his departure.

This was a man i had great plans for.

My mum complicated the whole issue cause she wasn't a caring type.

Amarisco:


https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1007/BF02506817

https://bmcfampract.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12875-016-0440-0

https://www.um.edu.mt/library/oar/bitstream/123456789/14185/1/2014-20-4.official

https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1998-12057-006

http://www.postpartummen.com/pdfs/SS%26M.PDF

https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1999-10525-006

These are just a few heavily cited scientific papers, but generally it’s a well understood and researched area. You don’t have to take my word for it.

i926:

This is a public forum. To grow, be ready to get lashed, when you are outta line.

You are welcome.

Osobi32:
exactly what am talking about. I never knew what my father went through until I became a father, all the times he comes home and night and my mom will be acting up. Niggar must have had a rough day, maybe swallowed insults from different angle just to provide for his family and yet never get appreciated. This is really sad

MummyD2020:


Kids will always know the parents that were there for them. If both suffered for them, why will they turn there backs on the parents? Although some parents are nothing to write home about

odinson1:
I'll be A Capital FOOL if I ever Get married.




Have you been to divorce courts before?



As long as you are in Nigeria and you don't do Court wedding,you are safe if you ever get divorced

Amarisco:
On the contrary, research indicates that women go through more e.g. victims of violence, lower pay, birth etc but just have better coping strategies. Strategies such as being more likely to seek medical help early, rely on social support systems and openly acknowledge the emotional impact of adverse experiences.

denobaba:
I wish you luck, bro. Sail thee well, may common sense be there for you
when the storms come hitting. Enjoy!

drimzsmoke:


For every man you know going through that kind of stress,I will show you 9 women living in hell.It's just that women are very strong MENTALLY,1/5th of the event that drove some women to church would kill a man or turn him into an alcoholic
Give a woman love,respect,attention and care...Peace of mind will be the least of the things you're going to get in return

egopersonified:
This is the effect of generations of family life. When we start solving this problem from the cause, there will never be answers.

We encourage our girls to focus on being wife materials and mothers. We teach them how to cook and take care of the home while the brothers are outside playing ball, making connections and going places. He is taught that a man's place is outside the home. To bring home the bacon. To take care of his family and be the bread winner. Till we start to teach our kids differently, we will still get this same results till eternity.


We teach our boys to not cry, don't show emotion and he bottles it up till he has a heart attack while a woman will cry from morning till night, shout out all her frustrations and be relieved from that burden.

We tell our men to take care of this girlfriend so another man doesn't snatch her. So he does two jobs and a side hustle just to 'maintain' her.

Why can't we teach our kids that both parties should be equal contributors to the family purse? Why can't the first person home make dinner? Why can't the man take the kids to the hospital while the woman goes to sell her tomatoes? Why do we have men coming on nairaland to tell us 'I take care of all the responsibilities in the home and all she does is to fill gas and she is complaining when I boil ordinary water to bath'?

Till we begin to train ourselves as one and the same unit, men will keep dieing young and women will keep enjoying the fruits of both their labours.

Amarisco:
On the contrary, research indicates that women go through more e.g. victims of violence, lower pay, birth etc but just have better coping strategies. Strategies such as being more likely to seek medical help early, rely on social support systems and openly acknowledge the emotional impact of adverse experiences.

Belafonte:


Lol. Expert manipulation from snake language gender. So, all men abandoned by their children weren't there for them? Lol.

The only advantage women have over their husbands is manipulation of the children. The children see what their mothers want the to see and most father's never realized this until it is too late

MummyD2020:


Abi o. Hard working and always crying of neglect gender

Belafonte:


Ma, please, don't quote me again. I don't like ugly women giving me attention. it's a turn off

OLRAYS:
85% of women, no matter how hard u dey strive to satisfy them...my brother u no do anything na wetin go come out of their mouth