Mariangeles:


Sorry dear.
Keep hanging on.
It'll help to talk about it with someone who understands.

DjBigMoni:
Thank God for safe delivery, even though it was CS everything went successful.

So my mum came around for Omugwo first and ever since my wife had been having issues with her. it got to the extent my wife pulled a knife on my mum and I, she even fought my mum before she left.

So her mum now came around for Omugwo also and I have not been giving her face even despite she has apologised with my wife also and even her Dad. But I'm still finding it difficult to forgive her don't know why.

Kobojunkie:
It ought not to be a tradition/custom though.

How many married men would, after having to be directly involved, and in charge of caring for wife and child- we are talking being hands own here I.e. changing diapers, feeding, bathing, massaging the mother, waking up at night to feed and change baby or sing said baby to sleep - this during the first 6 to 9 months after birth, opt for several more of that experience?

Some men would say no more kids after 1 or 2. Your Omugwos while helpful to some, serves as a serious impediment and ought to seize as a tradition.

eyinjuege:

The major problem many mothers (whether new or old) struggle with abroad is childcare. It's hard to get any help abroad with that, unless you're ready to pay major big bucks, which is more expensive than even bringing someone in from Nigeria to help you.

Oyiboman69:
1. for no matter any reasons should any woman embarkon such toxicity...

2. Someone said it could be as a result of the pregnancy, and now that she's given birth, she's still displaying her witchcraft.

3. there is no moral justification for her actions cos fighting an elderly woman who is old enough to be her mother is evil and should be condemned it it's entirety. had I be the man,no one will step her foot inside my house especially her mother or I'll vacate the house and the marriage....

4. All these is ad a result of lack of proper upbringing from the parents especially the mother. Will you fell good in any way if your brother's wife beat up your mother or if your daughter in-law fights you for whatever reasons?

Mariangeles:
Have you considered the fact that your wife might be going or might've gone through postpartum depression, which might've led to that behaviour?

Were she and your mum having problems before your wife got pregnant and had a baby?

N.B. Postpartum depression is not an excuse for bad behaviour, it is real.

NOETHNICITY:
Well my mum is a perfect person. Since I grew up and became an adult I ve never seen my mum quarrel with anybody much unlike most women in the neighborhood where I grew up. Even if my mum wasn't perfect, I expect anyone around me (particularly my wife) to condole whatever behavior or act of indiscretion my mum may exhibit in the cause of her temporary stay with us. Any woman or anybody who hesitate to understand this is not fit be in my nucleus

Mariangeles:
Have you considered the fact that your wife might be going or might've gone through postpartum depression, which might've led to that behaviour?

Were she and your mum having problems before your wife got pregnant and had a baby?

N.B. Postpartum depression is not an excuse for bad behaviour, it is real.

Mariangeles:
Have you considered the fact that your wife might be going or might've gone through postpartum depression, which might've led to that behaviour?

Were she and your mum having problems before your wife got pregnant and had a baby?

N.B. Postpartum depression is not an excuse for bad behaviour, it is real.
But the depression isn't apply to her mum Right?

Blyzz:
So husband don't get postpartum depression during wife's pregnancy for all the hustling to put food on the table, right? Because when it comes to women's issue, you guys have name for it. I may be going out of the topic, it absolute bullshit from his wife. She won't let her husband mother to visit for Omugo but she prefer her own mother. Why didn't her fight her own Mother? The way you guys defend your fellow women online, despite their witchcraft actions, you ladies still defend them. It makes me judge you ladies as same. Attending the same coven

Vickyvice:
my brother forget this omugwo yeye philosophy wey poor people invent. My sisters are married and given birth, but my mum no go. She just arrange baby accessories,,, clothes, toys, and their soaps, powder, foods and fill their kitchen with assorted foods, by waybill them abroad,. What's omugwo? Na low mentality slang. Like say we be low grade family, na so my mum go mumu leave her lecturing work wey she even dey look for more time to conclude research, dey urge to go abroad for omugwo, as if she's the first mother in law in d world, or na she be the first grandmum on earth, I hate to hear this useless term,,, omugwo. Africa and their useless mentality. It's is devised to attempt control the husband.

Oyiboman69:
1. I support you arguing of bringing issues to some family but you condemning it is very wrong. do you know after delivery, a lot is needed to be done from bathing of the baby to bathing the mother also with a very hot water which she would not be able to do on by herself cos there is some pain attach to it in the process and also keeping a close look on the baby and the mother?...

2. In addition, failure to do those things also result to some after effect on both of them. besides, how can a man have the chance and time to take of a nursing mother in the in this present Nigeria when all you bring financially is not enough?.... me wen my wife born,I no even fit cope with her and the baby for the same bed,cos after a hectic day, I got to sleep well so as to get healthy for the next day hustling....

3. from your write up, I can also deduced that your a single guy so,in this context, don't condemn the process... that girl is ill mannered devil,I won't tolerate such person around me...

Ninisun:



Small man, see you later. I thought I was explaining this is to someone wey get sense. So you feel women don't provide for the family, guy try get sense cus most women are providers these days. Bye

irunoko:
exactly.not an overbearing older woman. its easier for a nursing mother to heal faster if she's being assisted by someone who is loving and understanding not someone that would be aggravating her or giving her issues

Blyzz:
woman are greedy, they have a limit to what they do. Of course, they provide. But why must you support your fellow women even while she did wrong. Ain't that witchcraft? You already gave a name for the cause of her action. Btw, why did you call me small man, & don't bye me

Kobojunkie:
Forgive her for what?
What did the woman do that you are trying to forgive her for?

Or are you somehow not properly processing processing guilt of what happened in your mom's case and trying to make your wife's mom pay instead?

Mariangeles:
Have you considered the fact that your wife might be going or might've gone through postpartum depression, which might've led to that behaviour?

Were she and your mum having problems before your wife got pregnant and had a baby?

N.B. Postpartum depression is not an excuse for bad behaviour, it is real.

Emaprince:
1. You want the husband yo help nurse his wife to good health right? So he should stop working and sit at home with the nursing mother so he can properly look after them? Do you know the kind of job these MILs does when the man is away for work?

2. And for those questioning why the hubby's mom had to come..thats how its done. Both MILs has the right to come but from my experience, the hubby's mom usually stay for a brief moment, assist the woman and then leave. The wife's mom usually stay for a longer period of time. But in this country where these jezebels already have ill feelings towards there MILs.. they won't even like seeing the MIL carrying their babies who is the old womans grand child o.

3. Anyway..men whose wives fight their mom already presents themselves as weakmen that can't control their homes.

DjBigMoni:
Thank God for safe delivery, even though it was CS everything went successful.

So my mum came around for Omugwo first and ever since my wife had been having issues with her. it got to the extent my wife pulled a knife on my mum and I, she even fought my mum before she left.

So her mum now came around for Omugwo also and I have not been giving her face even despite she has apologised with my wife also and even her Dad. But I'm still finding it difficult to forgive her don't know why.

Mariangeles:
Have you considered the fact that your wife might be going or might've gone through postpartum depression, which might've led to that behaviour?

Were she and your mum having problems before your wife got pregnant and had a baby?

N.B. Postpartum depression is not an excuse for bad behaviour, it is real.

slimjohn2k5:
The best person to come for omugwo is from wife's family unless they are not available.

Moreover, do not take it against her as the person above me have told you she may be suffering from
postpartum depression.

Despite that please let her own people come first

TheKingsmann1:
my brother I been too suffer for this life, women just dey turn me down, na my mama come sponsor me for school still come do make I get job and become a responsible person, then later for life one stranger wey Dem call wife to come chase my mama away.
Tufiakwa.

NaijaHelper1:

You're an incredibly insensitive and stupid woman. I believe this is some crap woke agenda you have going on here.
1. So a man should handle the economic affairs of the house and still take out the time to attend to domestic issues when there are willing and ready hands who can adequately dispatch those duties.

2. What's wrong with a MIL coming to help out? She is experienced and has a vested interest in the welfare of both nursing mother and child.

3. Why don't you lay out your contributions and allow more sensible people to state theirs?
Why are some people so dumb?

Kobojunkie:
1. You don't know what precipitated her actions.... hence the reason why it is best to hear from the horses mouth on this. It could have been the case that the MIL threatened to take the baby away the woman in question. We don't know until the OP reveals the truth.

2. Postpartum depression does not go away after pregnancy. Sometimes it lasts years afterwards. It is not some predictable phenomenon and should not be treated as such.

3. Old women are humans and are prone to errors, aren't they?,

4. If my mother is out-of-line, she is out-of-line. I try to judge all things fairly - no favoritism.

DjBigMoni:
No other reason, she even had to threaten my life again after my mum incident, wanted to pure me hot water in the presence of her mum all because I said I'll still deal with her after all the pleading. she still begged for forgiveness that night

Mariangeles:
Have you considered the fact that your wife might be going or might've gone through postpartum depression, which might've led to that behaviour?

Were she and your mum having problems before your wife got pregnant and had a baby?

N.B. Postpartum depression is not an excuse for bad behaviour, it is real.

DjBigMoni:
Thank God for safe delivery, even though it was CS everything went successful.

So my mum came around for Omugwo first and ever since my wife had been having issues with her. it got to the extent my wife pulled a knife on my mum and I, she even fought my mum before she left.

So her mum now came around for Omugwo also and I have not been giving her face even despite she has apologised with my wife also and even her Dad. But I'm still finding it difficult to forgive her don't know why.