1x2x3:


I agree with all you said but I have a question.

How does a woman balance a man's need?

If you can answer that you will figure out she should have made provisions before leaving.

akpunda86:
Good morning fellas and compliments of the season. Some are happy some are not but we all thank God for life.
Happy Christmas all.

Well fellas sincerely wish I have the power to terminate my marriage I'm fed up 200%.

Is Christmas season of love all families stay together but my wife left home to her villa to see mum, yeah is a gud stuff going home to see parents, but if well planned. We planned after 25th she can go at least stay with the kids, suddenly she said she wanna go, I let her go, just yesterday wanted to eat, our helper said no soup in freezer, Kai I have to go buy soup outside. Today 24th, I'm gonna go to market to buy soup stuff.

It is very painful. I regret getting married cos in this season any sensible person knows families gonna be together. In fact kids need to enjoy it as we did during our time.

Salad we can't do, not that I don't have the money but I can't do it.

Her mum I told I'm not against ur daughter coming to see you, but she has to put her house in order first before embarking on a long journey.

Makes me regret a lot of stuff marrying outside my state, infact one can remarry, my spouse no go pass Enugu/Anambra.

Her mum sick, going see her I'm not against, my kids all crying all day long mummy mummy, I try pacify them.

Every December Na stress. It is true it is women that are mostly good in taking care of parents though we guys also do our best, but my wife has 3 brothes all married, as it is Xmas none of the wives is around so the daughters fall on.

I'm not writing this long epistle just that I feel bad as I don't know wat to do, sexually I gain noting from her, financially she doesn't support, it is only challenges she brings to me. If it continues like this, I'll leave the house for months 4 her and let her brain reset.

1x2x3:


She's insensitive, I've said that before. There's no excuse unless it was emergency. Anything aside that was premeditated on her part.

chii8:
Hmmmm....you just said she went to visit her sick mother?You said money is not the issue,then cook nah....You sound like a father who's not always around so you don't know much about taking care of the family.Is it your wife's fault that you can't pacify your own crying children nor cook for them?The in-law is sick and sickness doesn't give a pre information before it comes.

Oga,man up and take care of your children,biko!

Now because you can't cook and pacify your own crying children, you are thinking of divorce.Na waoooo, there's nothing Reverend no go see for pulpit

akpunda86:
Good morning fellas and compliments of the season. Some are happy some are not but we all thank God for life.
Happy Christmas all.

Well fellas sincerely wish I have the power to terminate my marriage I'm fed up 200%.

Is Christmas season of love all families stay together but my wife left home to her villa to see mum, yeah is a gud stuff going home to see parents, but if well planned. We planned after 25th she can go at least stay with the kids, suddenly she said she wanna go, I let her go, just yesterday wanted to eat, our helper said no soup in freezer, Kai I have to go buy soup outside. Today 24th, I'm gonna go to market to buy soup stuff.

It is very painful. I regret getting married cos in this season any sensible person knows families gonna be together. In fact kids need to enjoy it as we did during our time.

Salad we can't do, not that I don't have the money but I can't do it.

Her mum I told I'm not against ur daughter coming to see you, but she has to put her house in order first before embarking on a long journey.

Makes me regret a lot of stuff marrying outside my state, infact one can remarry, my spouse no go pass Enugu/Anambra.

Her mum sick, going see her I'm not against, my kids all crying all day long mummy mummy, I try pacify them.

Every December Na stress. It is true it is women that are mostly good in taking care of parents though we guys also do our best, but my wife has 3 brothes all married, as it is Xmas none of the wives is around so the daughters fall on.

I'm not writing this long epistle just that I feel bad as I don't know wat to do, sexually I gain noting from her, financially she doesn't support, it is only challenges she brings to me. If it continues like this, I'll leave the house for months 4 her and let her brain reset.

greypencils:
To balance a man's needs, she should keep doing everything she has been doing. Her leaving without taking care of the house is the exception not the norm. She is tired of the monotony of it all that's why she left without taking care of the house, it's more like a protest. And definitely, I believe a woman too should have something doing to supplement the man's income. Both man and wife must work, both man and wife should do house chores. That's what being modern is all about, balance.

Starseed:
My brother, I feel your pain. When you marry a bad wife, the devil will stop following you cos he has settled you for life.

Women can be very funny at times but you need God's wisdom to follow them. This part of your marriage challenge is part of the one you vowed for better and for worse. Just deal with it and endure it. It will pass.

Try and pray for grace to continue. Get closer to your wife. Show her more love and care. Buy her gifts, take her out. Ensure you rekindle the love you once had for her. Then watch and see the miracle of change in her life. Goodluck

prekumohtim:



It's okay to feel this way but you are not acting well on this . Women have feelings and have their own mind just like men. Yes you are the man of the house but sometime consider the fact that she's a human that got feelings and self-will. Biblically, a woman is part and parcel of her family irrespective of the fact that she's now married to you. ..."For this cause shall a MAN (not the woman)leave his father and mother". The woman does not leave . She's still a vital part of her family. She's got so much emotion and care to both her parents and your family. You don't compare her to her brothers who are also married. Think about yourself as a man and compare yourself to your female siblings. ..who visit parents more ? Female don't abandon their parents like men do. Men normally send money but money is not about everything. Parents need care . My elder sister(married with kids) takes care of my mum far more than I do. I normally send money likewise my elder brother (men do feel everything is about money ), my sister may not have money but she's always there. There will be a time your age parents may not need that money and can't eat much or think about good clothes but at that time, all they need is care. My neighbour lost his dad(87 years)two days ago. The man wept because he wasn't close to his dad at that age. He always sent money . He said, there were some discussions I felt I needed to pull of out of my dad , I didn't think he was going to die so soon.

Your problem is that, you feel the children should primarily be taken care of by their mum but she has been doing that for years. She ain't doing it this time doesn't mean you have to nail her. Give her a break . And also learn how to. Who do you think should have taken care of her mum when she's sick...her brothers ? A million times no. If the children so much miss their mum it means you have made their mum a greater part of their life because you are not helping out in domestic work. Don't merely consider your wife as domestic house help. Treat her nice and spice up your love life no matter how busy you are . But if you are looking outside for another woman , you may never think of how to spice up your marriage. I am from a broken home but I have made up my mind that my own marriage must work . That's a choice Sir

blazetitov:
I don't understand why some women behave this way. As the OP said, no problem with visiting her mum, but don't abandon your immediate family! A wise woman will make plans for her family before leaving. What is wrong in preparing different soups and keep in the freezer for the kids and hubby? it is well.

akpunda86:
Good morning fellas and compliments of the season. Some are happy some are not but we all thank God for life.
Happy Christmas all.

I'll leave the house for months 4 her and let her brain reset.

blazetitov:


How is he a weakling? Does it not make sense for the wife to settle her home before embarking on her journey? Is her immediate family no longer her primary assignment? I guess you not even married.

KiNg0G:

I don't need to get married to apply common sense to issue like this.


some of you men are weaklings ....I know what am saying.

I was once raised in a home, where if my mom is sick...or she's not around...house go just dey one kind. . throughout that period.

because everything was on her...apart from the money coming from dad.

it nor supposed to be so.
think like a man

Mood11:
Maybe she's equally tired (of you and the marriage) and needed to take some time off..
Does she know you are here on Nairaland opening a thread about her?

Man up and take care of your kids. Don't worry about a perfect salad whatever you are able to make serve it to them with love

BTW, when you knew that women from Enugu or Anambra make better wives and mothers why didn't you marry from there in the first place?

webosky:



The kind of men in this country makes we wonder how some women are still enduring in their marriages, so if the was an emergency where your wife had to travel immediately, y'all will starve at home ni, this is the same set of men that will say if a woman cannot cook it is a no-no. How far now?

FriendsAndFans:
She should have at least taken 1 of them along with her

Montaque:


That is one of the problem in the present matter, even the least problem. The problem here is that the woman places priority on seeing her mum (or whatever it is she went for) than taking care of her kids. Who would leave her kids suddenly without a back up plan? That's the problem.

1x2x3:


But the man is also here protesting that he is tired and you are telling him to shut up and be modern. They both must find a balance. You just believe any woman acting wrongly is about response to monotony. You see those slayqueens out there today? They will marry and do worse and you will make excuses in the name of monotony.

The man needs to improve and that woman should be cautioned, that's not a way to protest.

Simran94:

So a woman visiting her sick mother to take care of her is an Evil woman?
Did you even ask the OP why he's not able to take care of his own kids without the mother being present? What if the woman's enemy was dead, is this how the kids will continue to cry and he won't be capable of taking care of them? The OP doesn't even sound like someone who is close to his children because how can a father not have the ability to pacify his own children?

You men will end up killing yourselves before your time

KiNg0G:


you are a bufoon


my wife can't cook food for me and store it in The freezer for days to eat while she travels.


I yearn for fresh foods. That guy is less of a man.


so I make them myself



that's what being an alpha entails

be a self-independent man.



not impish like you dirty smelling men who can't afford to care for yourselves but need your wife to be there doing everything for you at all times.

including shaving your armpits.

cow!

blazetitov:
I don't understand why some women behave this way. As the OP said, no problem with visiting her mum, but don't abandon your immediate family! A wise woman will make plans for her family before leaving. What is wrong in preparing different soups and keep in the freezer for the kids and hubby? it is well.

SIRTee15:


All u people supporting this woman, is like something is wrong with u.
How can u abandon your kids without making provision for their sustenance? That's evil.
Or u think it's the man suffering from the lack of good food in the house. It's the children...her own children.
Making your children suffer due to acrimony btw spouse is evil.
U all saying he should go n feed the kids. Make himself carry side chick go lodge for hotel, what then will happen to the kids.
I know say naija men get there own for body but I'm beginning to think the women are as bad as the men.

LoveThemChubby:

It is this kind of one-way thinking of yours that has destroyed many marriages and relationships. How did she feel traveling without cooking to put in the freezer? The children are on holiday, what stopped her from traveling along with them? So if there is money and he can cook, does that excuse her action?