Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,186,044 members, 7,928,125 topics. Date: Thursday, 22 August 2024 at 09:42 AM

Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? - Family - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? (1048 Views)

My Wife Always Threatens To Leave Our Marriage Anytime We Have Issues / Searching For My Biological Dad Or Family / I’m An Adult, I’m Not A Kid. I'm Just Suffering From Dwarfism - 22-year-old (2) (3) (4)

(1) (Reply) (Go Down)

Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by donleo92(m): 10:11am On Dec 26, 2021
Am going to cut this story really short.
Am the only child of my dad, all though he is not married to my mum and he lost his wife last three years without having a child from her. to cut the story short I don't follow with him like our spirit don't align at all. maybe its cos of the fact that he is not married to my mum? maybe I can't tell.. and moreover he tells me he can't marry my mum. and the mummy she is talking about self has already moved on in her life
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by donleo92(m): 10:12am On Dec 26, 2021
Infact much family issues. most times I wish I can get married and denounce my dads place and just stay in the city.
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Mariangeles(f): 10:30am On Dec 26, 2021
to cut the story short I don't follow with him like our spirit don't align at all. maybe its cos of the fact that he is not married to my mum? maybe I can't tell...

The bond was never there in the first place, and it had nothing to do with whether your father was married to your mother or not.
If you father had wanted to, he would've been involved in your life.
There are people whose fathers are married to their mothers, and yet they don't share close bonds with their fathers.

How is he with you now? Is he looking to get close to you?
Are you or will you be willing to give relationship with him a chance? I'd say give it a chance if he wants to be involved in your life.

4 Likes

Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Richy4(m): 10:54am On Dec 26, 2021
donleo92:
Am going to cut this story really short.
Am the only child of my dad, all though he is not married to my mum and he lost his wife last three years without having a child from her. to cut the story short I don't follow with him like our spirit don't align at all. maybe its cos of the fact that he is not married to my mum? maybe I can't tell.. and moreover he tells me he can't marry my mum. and the mummy she is talking about self has already moved on in her life

@ bold is the problem man.... it is resentment... You feel that your mum was the side chick... U see that status as distasteful.. u are not finding it funny....

I will suggest that you let your mum fight her battle...You did not know the agreement they had before they gave birth to you... do not get involved...It is not compulsory that all relationship must end in marriage.. try and be civil with him... Cheers buddy

1 Like

Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by GboyegaD(m): 11:05am On Dec 26, 2021
Guess there are many things that need closure. I will say relax and be open to listen to him instead of bothering too much about his relationship with your mom.
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by pussygotlips: 11:14am On Dec 26, 2021
I'm here to learn
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by donleo92(m): 12:26pm On Dec 26, 2021
Mariangeles:


The bond was never there in the first place, and it had nothing to do with whether your father was married to your mother or not.
If you father had wanted to, he would've been involved in your life.
There are people whose fathers are married to their mothers, and yet they don't share close bonds with their fathers.

How is he with you now? Is he looking to get close to you?
Are you or will you be willing to give relationship with him a chance? I'd say give it a chance if he wants to be involved in your life.


see the thing is that we just don't agree on things, he is just someone that blames people a lot. maybe cos of his upbringing, cos he lost his dad at a tender age and his mother was what he had. his elder brother wasn't dia for him. and currently now, him and his elder brother are not on good terms...

baba the thing just get as e be.
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Mariangeles(f): 2:09pm On Dec 26, 2021
donleo92:



see the thing is that we just don't agree on things, he is just someone that blames people a lot. maybe cos of his upbringing, cos he lost his dad at a tender age and his mother was what he had. his elder brother wasn't dia for him. and currently now, him and his elder brother are not on good terms...

baba the thing just get as e be.

You'd rather not complicate your life any further with all his other issues. Understandable.
Just do what you know is right.

1 Like

Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by MrBrownJay1(m): 4:49pm On Dec 26, 2021
you dont have to align with your father's views...just understand that everyone is different and your father is "special" like that.
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Kobojunkie: 8:57pm On Dec 26, 2021
donleo92:
Am going to cut this story really short.
Am the only child of my dad, all though he is not married to my mum and he lost his wife last three years without having a child from her. to cut the story short I don't follow with him like our spirit don't align at all. maybe its cos of the fact that he is not married to my mum? maybe I can't tell.. and moreover he tells me he can't marry my mum. and the mummy she is talking about self has already moved on in her life
Your parents are divorced and you are stil not reconciled with this at what age?? undecided
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Nobody: 9:09pm On Dec 26, 2021
Same as me
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Mariangeles(f): 9:18pm On Dec 26, 2021
Kobojunkie:
Your parents are divorced and you are still not reconciled with this at what age?? undecided

His mother was never married to his father.
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Kobojunkie: 9:27pm On Dec 26, 2021
Mariangeles:
His mother was never married to his father.
Ok. So this grown boy wants the old man to marry his mum so that.....? undecided
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Mariangeles(f): 9:32pm On Dec 26, 2021
Kobojunkie:
Ok. So this grown boy wants the old man to marry his mum so that.....? undecided

I think he just wants to feel wanted by his father.
To be part of a complete family might've been his dream. It doesn't matter how old he gets.
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Kobojunkie: 10:05pm On Dec 26, 2021
Mariangeles:
I think he just wants to feel wanted by his father.
To be part of a complete family might've been his dream. It doesn't matter how old he gets.
A complete family? Well, Goodluck with that, @ OP. undecided

I would however advice that you take to heart all the lessons life has passed over to you from your childhood heartaches so you don't turn and inflict inflict same pain on your own children and future spouse. undecided
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by frozen70(f): 6:47am On Dec 28, 2021
donleo92:
Am going to cut this story really short.
Am the only child of my dad, all though he is not married to my mum and he lost his wife last three years without having a child from her. to cut the story short I don't follow with him like our spirit don't align at all. maybe its cos of the fact that he is not married to my mum? maybe I can't tell.. and moreover he tells me he can't marry my mum. and the mummy she is talking about self has already moved on in her life

It was his attitude towards your mum that made you to dislike him
So nothing about him entices you

Am glad your mum have moved on since

Your dad has nothing except you on this earth and he has just realised that he has not been in your life despite not being married to your mum

I will advise you over look his side and struggle for yourself and become a strong man with sense of a complete man

By the time you become stable in life, your dad will humble himself because of old age

Then for your dad, is best for him to go and remarry so that his old age won't be a problem for you because your mum is already done with him for life

1 Like

Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by fineboynl(m): 7:44am On Dec 28, 2021
You father might be a difficult man. I has a reason why he will never marry you mother. And that same reason was transferred to how he treats you both. Another thing is that he might just accept the pregnancy but there was not bond. Most men bond with children whole mother they love. If they hate the mother it will be difficult accepting her kids.

Both of you can never bond. If he had other children his WILL would have favor them more.
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by donleo92(m): 9:03am On Dec 28, 2021
frozen70:


It was his attitude towards your mum that made you to dislike him
So nothing about him entices you

Am glad your mum have moved on since

Your dad has nothing except you on this earth and he has just realised that he has not been in your life despite not being married to your mum

I will advise you over look his side and struggle for yourself and become a strong man with sense of a complete man

By the time you become stable in life, your dad will humble himself because of old age

Then for your dad, is best for him to go and remarry so that his old age won't be a problem for you because your mum is already done with him for life




This is the best stuff I have had so far. thanks man
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by frozen70(f): 10:21am On Dec 28, 2021
donleo92:





This is the best stuff I have had so far. thanks man

Thanks too, ma'am pls not man
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by donleo92(m): 7:45pm On Dec 28, 2021
frozen70:

Thanks too, ma'am pls not man
am so sorry ma
Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by frozen70(f): 10:06pm On Dec 28, 2021
donleo92:


am so sorry ma

Thanks

1 Like

Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Saintmary(f): 4:29am On Dec 29, 2021
donleo92:
Am going to cut this story really short.
Am the only child of my dad, all though he is not married to my mum and he lost his wife last three years without having a child from her. to cut the story short I don't follow with him like our spirit don't align at all. maybe its cos of the fact that he is not married to my mum? maybe I can't tell.. and moreover he tells me he can't marry my mum. and the mummy she is talking about self has already moved on in her life

Your dad never had a father figure in his life, so, he doesn't know how to be a father.

Just do your bit for him as a son but try not to end up like him.

1 Like

Re: Is It Normal For An Adult To Have Issues With The Dad? Or Is It A Curse? by Opeyemiextra(f): 7:43am On Dec 29, 2021
I have similar issue with my father and honestly I still don't want to have anything to do with him. Unlike most people who hold grudges against their 'unavailable and bachelor' dads, I feel nothing whatsoever for or against him.
If he wants anything with you, he would have made the effort so that's where your answer lies.

(1) (Reply)

A Boy Just Won 16 Million [ Picture ] / How Can You Tell Your Parents About Your Baby. / 3k For Anyone Who Can Successfully The Insect In This Photo

Viewing this topic: 1 guest(s)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 3
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.