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I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband - Family (8) - Nairaland

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About To Divorce My Husband Who Sponsored Me In School. / I Want To Divorce My Husband As Soon As Possible / Time To Divorce My Wife? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by asanausana91: 9:23am On Mar 03, 2022
loosingfaith519:
I recently discovered my husband has an addiction and I can't stay married to him.
As soon as money enters his hand, he starts funding some online app and start gambling.
We got married last year Nov.
We have needs and plans we agreed to achieve before the end of March. Which a better accommodation is one of our first goal. Our present accommodation is not ok at all.
On my own part, I'm saving to meet up with our Target, but I discovered, he has nothing. He collected contributions last month, over 200k. All that money wasted. He can't account for it.
January salary has entered, he has started wasting it again.

I'm expecting him to provide 300k at the end of this month. So, that when I sum it with mine, we can have over 600k. Get a decent accommodation and invest the rest.
We need to plan, save for our baby, but his attitude with money is not encouraging me.
The truth is, my husband is stressing me for lack of accountability.

Pls, how do I go about a peaceful divorce? I'm confused, because I'm pregnant.

All the things I'm seeing him do, suffocate me.
What do I do?
Pls, advise me.
for how long you guys courted?
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by mpire: 9:23am On Mar 03, 2022
[s]
Nadeol:
This is a true story:

One of our customer's wife got fed up with his Bet9ja (football bet) habit and just like you, was having 'funny' thoughts.

One day, he brought home a nice Lexus jeep and handed over the key to her, she was surprised and questioned where he got the money from, but he just cooked up a story. They also started a very lucrative business.

Three months later, he decided to open up to her and narrated how that same football bet fetched him millions of naira and how it changed their lives forever.

We do not support gambling, but come to think of it, anything that is not 100% sure and you make an attempt at, is called what? As long as it is a game of chance, it is calleherd what?
[/s]

So where is your own bicycle at least since you've been playing, you mean you personally don't have a success gambling story even from your sister's, uncle cousin's step mother?

3 Likes

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by King3urna(m): 9:23am On Mar 03, 2022
loosingfaith519:
I recently discovered my husband has an addiction and I can't stay married to him.
As soon as money enters his hand, he starts funding some online app and start gambling.
We got married last year Nov.
We have needs and plans we agreed to achieve before the end of March. Which a better accommodation is one of our first goal. Our present accommodation is not ok at all.
On my own part, I'm saving to meet up with our Target, but I discovered, he has nothing. He collected contributions last month, over 200k. All that money wasted. He can't account for it.
January salary has entered, he has started wasting it again.

I'm expecting him to provide 300k at the end of this month. So, that when I sum it with mine, we can have over 600k. Get a decent accommodation and invest the rest.
We need to plan, save for our baby, but his attitude with money is not encouraging me.
The truth is, my husband is stressing me for lack of accountability.

Pls, how do I go about a peaceful divorce? I'm confused, because I'm pregnant.

All the things I'm seeing him do, suffocate me.
What do I do?
Pls, advise me.





It happens this post is indirectly talking for real I’m seriously addicted to something very expensive I have a pregnant girl who needs every day but I will chose it then regret after buying am my girl is worried and scared though she could not tell me to face but her body language says it all and not happy with my self I cos I made so many promise before she agreed to carry the child now I’m not living up to any of them I need some hash advice oh

1 Like

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by delishpot: 9:23am On Mar 03, 2022
Fulaniherdmens:
Sometimes it ponders my heart how a grown up woman will sit-down and be working for the devil and not for a man she see and feel. You have this thought while in a marriage and you ran here to seek for advise on divorce. Well if you have choose this part and be rest assured that the baby you carry is not someone else own, please pack your load and leave that young man to chase for his future. I have seen whites that win big with little money. Their are people that gamble all way to casino lifestyles. If divorce is a western lifestyle then gambling its. God forsaken Woman...

You dont know what you are talking about.. You dont even know the problem gambling addiction can cause to a home.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by queenfav(f): 9:24am On Mar 03, 2022
You can work on the marriage by talking to him.This our generation is too quick to give up on marriage!Except there are other things like physical abuse, womanizing and maybe substance abuse that you aren't telling us.
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Aufbauh(m): 9:24am On Mar 03, 2022
mpire:


You are are dum.b? Gambling is a guaranteed investment right? Oh I get it you're another brain dead delusional gambler. If she were your sister you'll ask her to do what?


I guess you're probably a kid going by your shallow response.
Where did I said that Gambling is a guaranteed investment or better still, which investment is guaranteed?
I'm talking as a grown man & not an inexperienced young adult.

I'm 13 years in Marriage and I've equally had series of issues which some are more challenging to me than what the op is complaining of.
Marriage is for mature Adults & not for sensationally impatient adults.
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by InvertedHammer: 9:25am On Mar 03, 2022
/
This is bound to happen when people concentrate on profession and income while disregarding expenditures. Someone who makes N5m/month but spends N6m/month is still as broke as it can get.

/

1 Like 1 Share

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Messi1997: 9:25am On Mar 03, 2022
What happened to the marital vows you took?
You should be there for him help him overcome his addictions not divorce.
I know personally gambling kills but you as a wife should sit him down and talk to him.
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by slevan: 9:26am On Mar 03, 2022
Take it easy. This will become a history! Trust me, it would.

loosingfaith519:
I recently discovered my husband has an addiction and I can't stay married to him.
As soon as money enters his hand, he starts funding some online app and start gambling.
We got married last year Nov.
We have needs and plans we agreed to achieve before the end of March. Which a better accommodation is one of our first goal. Our present accommodation is not ok at all.
On my own part, I'm saving to meet up with our Target, but I discovered, he has nothing. He collected contributions last month, over 200k. All that money wasted. He can't account for it.
January salary has entered, he has started wasting it again.

I'm expecting him to provide 300k at the end of this month. So, that when I sum it with mine, we can have over 600k. Get a decent accommodation and invest the rest.
We need to plan, save for our baby, but his attitude with money is not encouraging me.
The truth is, my husband is stressing me for lack of accountability.

Pls, how do I go about a peaceful divorce? I'm confused, because I'm pregnant.

All the things I'm seeing him do, suffocate me.
What do I do?
Pls, advise me.
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Kobicove(m): 9:26am On Mar 03, 2022
Richy4:
Anyone that says they should sit down and talk have never met an addict before...it's like pouring water in a basket..... cheesy

Don't mind them, let them be talking nonsense undecided

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Nobody: 9:26am On Mar 03, 2022
aikyg:
How you didn't notice this while you were dating is a big question. Divorcing him may not be an easy decision, since you have a baby coming. Since he doesn't physical abuse you, I'll suggest you both go for counseling

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Putindbutt: 9:27am On Mar 03, 2022
loosingfaith519:
My thought too. Thanks
Your thoughts too abi?.. Merchychen is over 35, single & lonely. You can park your load and go leave with her so that both of you can live your lives embittered together since your mind is already made up.
But if you still want your marriage, you have to take every step to make him stop it. Gambling is addictive but can be stopped. You will have to be a bit more patient while at it, he can't give up what he's been doing for so long at once.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by mpire: 9:27am On Mar 03, 2022
[s]
naija4life247:


It's not one year into the marriage, it's just four months, just about 120 fuccking days ooo. Maybe her mother is currently with her 6th husband, if not, I wonder where she got this madness from.
[/s]

The fact that your who.re of a mother wasn't able to tell you who your father was before she abandoned you at the refuse dump with the dogs doesn't mean that is everybody's story you know. Why are you displaying your entire life's gambling frustration on a stranger?

4 Likes

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by BluntTheApostle(m): 9:28am On Mar 03, 2022
loosingfaith519:
I recently discovered my husband has an addiction and I can't stay married to him.
As soon as money enters his hand, he starts funding some online app and start gambling.
We got married last year Nov.
We have needs and plans we agreed to achieve before the end of March. Which a better accommodation is one of our first goal. Our present accommodation is not ok at all.
On my own part, I'm saving to meet up with our Target, but I discovered, he has nothing. He collected contributions last month, over 200k. All that money wasted. He can't account for it.
January salary has entered, he has started wasting it again.

I'm expecting him to provide 300k at the end of this month. So, that when I sum it with mine, we can have over 600k. Get a decent accommodation and invest the rest.
We need to plan, save for our baby, but his attitude with money is not encouraging me.
The truth is, my husband is stressing me for lack of accountability.

Pls, how do I go about a peaceful divorce? I'm confused, because I'm pregnant.

All the things I'm seeing him do, suffocate me.
What do I do?
Pls, advise me.

I am a punter too, and I have about 3 betting accounts.

Your husband's problem is that he is not a financially disciplined person.

In my own case, I set a limit every month. I make sure never to stake past that amount.

My maximum stake is 20,000 per month. I also have maximum for casinos. I will never stake past it no matter how long my losing streak is.

When I started betting, dem chop money no be small. The more I lost, the more I played. Then, I began to read books, and I became a smarter punter.

Your husband needs to use money more wisely.

The only good thing is that he is at least squandering it in the hope of getting more money faster, rather than wasting it on prostitutes and side-chicks.

I will advise you find a way to make him more financially disciplined. For example, you people should speak to your bank to help with a joint savings account which automatically debits salaries as soon as they come in.

Leave some amount of money for him to stake with every month. When the money finishes, let him wait till next month.

1 Like

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Nobody: 9:30am On Mar 03, 2022
bodyloveghetto:


Your thought too? Damn so you’ve got this bitterness thought all along and you on here seeking for advice? Aunty it your life anywayz, your choice & your burden…
Is like you're into gambling as well. How much have you made so far, because the last time I checked, my husband is always in need of money, yet he earn much.
I feel like gathering all of you doing the same stu.pid habit, stressing your loved ones in one room and set you on fire?
Rub.bish

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by delishpot: 9:30am On Mar 03, 2022
aikyg:
How you didn't notice this while you were dating is a big question. Divorcing him may not be an easy decision, since you have a baby coming. Since he doesn't physical abuse you, I'll suggest you both go for counseling


She prolly was not looking into his finances wben they were dating. She most likely was managing well as a single woman but now that they are married and expecting she need him to pull his weight as hubby but now she is beginning to see the real him as it concerns his finances.
As for catching him in the act, unless she is the type that stays with him 24/7 he might hide his addiction whenever she is around for visits.

4 Likes

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by edunaragold(f): 9:30am On Mar 03, 2022
loosingfaith519:
I recently discovered my husband has an addiction and I can't stay married to him.
As soon as money enters his hand, he starts funding some online app and start gambling.
We got married last year Nov.
We have needs and plans we agreed to achieve before the end of March. Which a better accommodation is one of our first goal. Our present accommodation is not ok at all.
On my own part, I'm saving to meet up with our Target, but I discovered, he has nothing. He collected contributions last month, over 200k. All that money wasted. He can't account for it.
January salary has entered, he has started wasting it again.

I'm expecting him to provide 300k at the end of this month. So, that when I sum it with mine, we can have over 600k. Get a decent accommodation and invest the rest.
We need to plan, save for our baby, but his attitude with money is not encouraging me.
The truth is, my husband is stressing me for lack of accountability.

Pls, how do I go about a peaceful divorce? I'm confused, because I'm pregnant.

All the things I'm seeing him do, suffocate me.
What do I do?
Pls, advise me.
. Two students was dating, Yoruba is bf, Edo is gf,so she was pregnant by mistake by the bf,after the parent settle,she went back to see her mom after given birth and baby is 5 months ,she told the mom that this bf has change oo,she don't understand him any more even as both are students,and staying together, the mom said ,is he beating you,she said no,is she taking care of u and the baby,she said yes,even be bought food stuff before he travel to Lagos ,the mother said ,my daughter you are mad,u better thank God,all men are the same ,no man wey no like woman if he is not drinking or smoking, go back and be patience. The daughter when home and was determine to stay no matter what. Pray for him,call a pastor to come talk to him,use that energy and foccus on your own job,pray for him
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Arielle: 9:30am On Mar 03, 2022
.... Ask you Mama even your papa never still complete till today.[/quote]
grin I like that and its so true. This jumping out of marriage at the first sign of difficulty is very ill-advised. The OP thinks this is boyfriend/girlfriend. Marriage is hard work. You will never reap the gains of a good marriage if you're not ready to put in the work, sacrifice and committment. These young people, sha!
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Karlzy01(m): 9:32am On Mar 03, 2022
loosingfaith519:
Sir, how did you change? Was it counseling or how?
13th March will make it 2yrs I quit gambling.

I didn't go for counselling or anything.
I got into trouble so much so that I was beaten by a soldier and asked to do frog jump on Sunday 1st of March,2020.

I got into trouble so much so that I was been cut off from everybody I was related to,a ran away from home in Lagos and came to benin cos I messed up to the tune of 600k,my family had literally given up on me.

I was working as a cashier for a guy in a bet9ja
Shop in Benin the guy was a Cultist to and he had soldier friends, alot of times my account wouldn't be balanced and I'd be owing him,so on this particular day i finished the money in the account,more than 80k plus the ones I was owing him previously it was about 115k .

He and he's soldier friends had warned me that if I mess with the account again I was going to regret it,he knew where I stayed in Ekosodin so ....

Please I'll finish this story later,I'm a bit busy.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by heniford2: 9:33am On Mar 03, 2022
loosingfaith519:
I recently discovered my husband has an addiction and I can't stay married to him.
As soon as money enters his hand, he starts funding some online app and start gambling.
We got married last year Nov.
We have needs and plans we agreed to achieve before the end of March. Which a better accommodation is one of our first goal. Our present accommodation is not ok at all.
On my own part, I'm saving to meet up with our Target, but I discovered, he has nothing. He collected contributions last month, over 200k. All that money wasted. He can't account for it.
January salary has entered, he has started wasting it again.

I'm expecting him to provide 300k at the end of this month. So, that when I sum it with mine, we can have over 600k. Get a decent accommodation and invest the rest.
We need to plan, save for our baby, but his attitude with money is not encouraging me.
The truth is, my husband is stressing me for lack of accountability.

Pls, how do I go about a peaceful divorce? I'm confused, because I'm pregnant.

All the things I'm seeing him do, suffocate me.
What do I do?
Pls, advise me.
the Pressure you guys put on guys its just to much, u want to move to a bigger apartment and after that start begging again, the pressure has made him to start gambling your trying to say doing those days u where dating him he was not addicted to it, he paid ur bridal price abi did wedding right
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Putindbutt: 9:34am On Mar 03, 2022
mpire:


79% of which men? grin. Did you pull that data out of your ass? You mean 79% of you re.tarded no future, jobless clowns. Where did you get your Data Analyst degree from? Pretty sure it's from The University of Dumb.ass.
Rich men play sports betting too. fool
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by jeff1607(m): 9:34am On Mar 03, 2022
Romanoff:


There is no way she would have noticed it, especially if he's an online gambler. Shey y'all like your privacy and say your partner shouldn't check your phone?

That's why she wouldn't have known.

How would she have been able to track his finances when y'all get defensive when a woman ask y'all money questions?

I'd suggest counselling for both of them, if he's willing to do the work, the marriage can be salvaged.

She would have known before marriage, it’s so easy to know one especially if they are dating, how can a lady marry a man who isn’t open with his expenses and his movement c’mon, plus his movement during weekends, they way he follows up on scores not actual matches, unless they didn’t court or he was spending unnecessarily and she did ask questions, a lady who is truly matured and concerned is usually worried about her man’s finances take for instance she notices his house is usually stocked with food stuffs by month end then suddenly either the pantry is empty or he’s buying half of what he usually buy she should know there’s something wrong somewhere.

There are so many pointers to know while dating hence some ladies when they see such traits they just break up with such a guy and he would say “the lady just ghosted him or walked away”

1 Like

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by 15ssDRIVE(m): 9:35am On Mar 03, 2022
loosingfaith519:
I recently discovered my husband has an addiction and I can't stay married to him.
As soon as money enters his hand, he starts funding some online app and start gambling.
We got married last year Nov.
We have needs and plans we agreed to achieve before the end of March. Which a better accommodation is one of our first goal. Our present accommodation is not ok at all.
On my own part, I'm saving to meet up with our Target, but I discovered, he has nothing. He collected contributions last month, over 200k. All that money wasted. He can't account for it.
January salary has entered, he has started wasting it again.

I'm expecting him to provide 300k at the end of this month. So, that when I sum it with mine, we can have over 600k. Get a decent accommodation and invest the rest.
We need to plan, save for our baby, but his attitude with money is not encouraging me.
The truth is, my husband is stressing me for lack of accountability.

Pls, how do I go about a peaceful divorce? I'm confused, because I'm pregnant.

All the things I'm seeing him do, suffocate me.
What do I do?
Pls, advise me.


Dear Sister,
Just make sure you get a good phone, go to the next betting center. Devote 2-3 days, record them with their high spirit when they come betting. Be sure you got enough time to record them after getting their obituary loosing result.

In 2 -3 days you will not be angry, but you will be pitying your man. Abeg play the video for him after family time, at least you guys still have some Short chit chat.

You can also send him data first, and then the videos.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Arielle: 9:35am On Mar 03, 2022
baby124:
He can’t change. If you continue, just prepare to assume most responsibilities with him more than likely robbing you of the little you have. They will keep telling you to endure, he will use ego and probably violence to shut you up, while you wallow in poverty. I have seen this case like 3 times.

The way people behave around money is so crucial in marriage. Some people are addicted to money. They get a high from getting money they did not work for, spending it lavishly and repeat. It’s best you let him as an adult decide if he wants to continue messing up his life or choosing his family. You need a lot of luck if you stay.
How will she know how far gone he is if she doesn't even try? How can you say you love a man and you don't try to help him? An addiction does not mean its his character. It is a sickness and can be overcome with support, love and expert help. You don't give up so easily on someone you love.
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Kenturkey048(m): 9:37am On Mar 03, 2022
Mercychen:
That is why they are always looking for a working class lady who can bring to the table so they can continue gambling and spending their own money recklessly. You better dump his ass.

You don't need to go through all that stress of divorcing him because that will drain you mentally and physically except you plan to remarry which is not advisable as most of them are the same. So, just secretly get a place for yourself and your unborn child and leave him without warning, before you lose your sanity.

When he's ready to leave the singlehood lifestyle and become a responsible husband, he can come for his family. Otherwise, forget about him. Life is too sweet to let one person keep you in sorrow all the days of your life.

Marriage is overhyped, especially in this generation of overgrown babies in men's skin.
Where is your advice ?
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by OCTAVO: 9:38am On Mar 03, 2022
Just 4 months? I may be hard on you, you are impatient, selfish and self-centred!
How would you feel if your husband notices something bad about you too after marriage and opt for divorce after 4 months?
It's like you are not even interested in making your marriage work, that's why you can consider divorce after 4 months. Did you ever love your husband at all before marrying him? Mehn!
In as much as I understand your frustration about his gambling habit, I think he needs you to help him overcome this habit. And you are unwilling to help him, you gave up on him too quick! Some faced worse predicament and they overcame. I wonder what this generation is really turning into.
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by duncan511: 9:38am On Mar 03, 2022
Mercychen:
That is why they are always looking for a working class lady who can bring to the table so they can continue gambling and spending their own money recklessly. You better dump his ass.

You don't need to go through all that stress of divorcing him because that will drain you mentally and physically except you plan to remarry which is not advisable as most of them are the same. So, just secretly get a place for yourself and unborn child and leave him without warning, before you lose your sanity.

When he's ready to leave the singlehood lifestyle and become a responsible husband, he can come for his family. Otherwise, forget about him. Life is too sweet to let one person keep you in sorrow all the days of your life.

Marriage is overhypped, especially in this generation of overgrown babies in men's skin.
this one nor go fit stay for marriage because of her bitter,
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Putindbutt: 9:38am On Mar 03, 2022
DrFunmisticGlow:
abort his pregnancy if it is less than 12weeks. You are stuck. Go to a lawyer.
All because of gambling. Someone like you would stab your husband to death when he gambles.

1 Like

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by bestdudes: 9:39am On Mar 03, 2022
loosingfaith519:
I recently discovered my husband has an addiction and I can't stay married to him.
As soon as money enters his hand, he starts funding some online app and start gambling.
We got married last year Nov.
We have needs and plans we agreed to achieve before the end of March. Which a better accommodation is one of our first goal. Our present accommodation is not ok at all.
On my own part, I'm saving to meet up with our Target, but I discovered, he has nothing. He collected contributions last month, over 200k. All that money wasted. He can't account for it.
January salary has entered, he has started wasting it again.

I'm expecting him to provide 300k at the end of this month. So, that when I sum it with mine, we can have over 600k. Get a decent accommodation and invest the rest.
We need to plan, save for our baby, but his attitude with money is not encouraging me.
The truth is, my husband is stressing me for lack of accountability.

Pls, how do I go about a peaceful divorce? I'm confused, because I'm pregnant.

All the things I'm seeing him do, suffocate me.
What do I do?
Pls, advise me.

You are good woman but unfortunately, you should have tried to know this before proceeding to marry and now you are pregnant. It will be hard.

Any marriage where one spouse does not heed the advise of the other it bad. He should channel that attitude to Youtube so that he can learn new skills that can be used to make money.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by seyz91(m): 9:39am On Mar 03, 2022
Just one year into your marriage and you're already fed up with the marriage. Haba!

@bolded! Not even up to a year sef, na just 4months marriage, very very fresh undecided

You can imagine that

Naija girls of now adays not mentally ready for marriage union but the wedding and Tag of I am married so to them make their parent proud as a typical African Lady sees marriage as an Achievement.



Aufbauh:
Sorry to say this, it seems you're not really matured for marriage.

Seeing this deficiency in your partner Just one year into your marriage and you're already fed up with the marriage. Haba!
If he was your blood brother would you have given up on him so quickly?

He might be doing this with the intention of hitting it big for the family even though you perceived it differently.
Sit down with him & advice him tactically or make an alternative investment suggestion to him that will take his attention off the online gambling.
Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Deborah98(f): 9:39am On Mar 03, 2022
Marriage doesn't change a dysfunction. If he was exhibiting this behavior in courtship how do you expect him to change. Marriage is a leverage ground for people to now freely do what they have been doing in secret. Well it's never too late in the eyes of God for change. Go on your knees and pray. Seek wise counsels from people. Talk to him about it and on your plan save for the arrival of your baby while trusting God for a change.

2 Likes

Re: I Want To Peacefully Divorce My Husband by Osanoghodua1: 9:40am On Mar 03, 2022
Divorce never a good option. You should pray over this and discuss this with him. Let him totally hands off from gambling. I wonder how you didn't discover this while dating or you were blinded by Love? God will help him quickly.

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