WoundedLamb:
Context and intentions get them upset, not the fact that they are women. In other words, they don't have issues with being women. Rather, they have issues with the idea that a woman isn't supposed to say/do whatever it is they said/did that made you make the statement. You'd naturally drag me to the grave if I say to you, "you're supposed to pay your girlfriend's school fees. You're a man." It's not because you're not a man but because you don't think being a man makes it your duty to pay a girl's school fees. I thought this was obvious though.

pocohantas:


Me no dey argue with man. E better make I go pick beans. They are too HEmotional to see beyond their noses. I jump and pass.

RightToReject:
It depends on the people involved and the situation where and how it happened:

It can be a complimentary remark - example, when a highly intuitive woman helps you dissect a person or extrapolate a concept quickly. From your demeanor and the connotation of your pronouncement, a reasonable woman in this regard will automatically understand that it comes from the place of justness and admiration from you, given that reasonable women tend to be highly intuitive.

Of course, it can be used to convey derision, as it's usually the case in most cases, rather than to compliment, just like smirking and smiling/laughing do, respectively - In this regard, the demeanor and connotation of the pronouncement, no matter how hard one might try to gloss their true intention, will definitely show that it was made to deride.

CumOnHer:

I can understand the complimentary part but the derision part is lost on me.

If you told a child " You're a child", it is complimentary, derision or could be both?
How could " you're a woman" have two sides of a coin?

cococandy:
For the DENSE people let me break to down for you.
Most women love being women and are proud of being women.


However we know that you guys don’t respect women due to your innate and nurtured misogyny. So when you say “you’re a woman” to a woman out of the blues and unrelated to whatever the conversation is, we know it’s because you think in your twisted mind that it’s a form of insult.

That’s why you think telling a man he acts or thinks like a woman is an insult. That’s why a man “driving like a woman” is unbecoming. That’s why you groom young boys to think the worst thing they can be is effeminate. So they overcompensate in order to prove they are not like lowly women.

When you tell a woman she’s a woman, it’s because you’re thinking in that moment that she’s overreaching her level and needs to “stay in her place”. The place you believe is beneath you.

But let’s all pretend to be idiots here shall we.

CumOnHer:

Do you mean "you are a woman" places certain limitations on them? Care to give examples.
You bringing in gender obligations. Such as a woman has what and what not she is obligated to?.. I think it will only gets more complicated and distasteful when women begin to tell us what & what not they are obligated to.
To make things much easier for everyone, women must accept the fact that they are women.

thorpido:
In what way could,'you're a child' be derision?

WoundedLamb:


Hhmm... but your comment doesn't really show you read mine at all. You just said the opposite of what I wrote. I said they're not disputing the fact that they are women but only challenging the idea that they're not supposed to do some things cause they're women. You think a woman wants to be called a man? I gave an example using a man since the question came from a man.

That expression when taken out of context becomes useless. To understand why a lady wouldn't want to be told that, you must put into context. And people use that expression mostly to tell women what to do and what not to do thus the reason it has become limiting. A lady who just gave birth to twins wouldn't be upset when you tell her "dear, you're indeed a woman!" But when a lady desides to japa like everyone else or pursue her career to the fullest or contest for SUG president or speak up in public like everyone else or do any of those things men think are reserved for them, that's when you hear people say "you're a woman" or "don't you know you're a woman?" The person speaking is the one placing the limitation, the person objecting is only reacting to it.

You get it now?

cococandy:
Okay bro

Palema007:
"You are a woman" ehn ehn before nko? I be goat?

But heaven will help you sha if one day you need my input on a matter. Nah then you go explain your " you are a woman" sentence.



No stress at all.

CumOnHer:

Women don't have a big ego.

CumOnHer:

NO

Palema007:
Well I do.

WoundedLamb:
Ok.

CumOnHer:

Your analogies are not agreeable.

CumOnHer:

You don't. Your ego is recessive, men egos are dominant. know this and know peace.

CumOnHer:

I can understand the complimentary part but the derision part is lost on me.

If you told a child " You're a child", it is complimentary, derision or could be both?
How could " you're a woman" have two sides of a coin?

pocohantas:


Me no dey argue with man. E better make I go pick beans. They are too HEmotional to see beyond their noses. I jump and pass.

Palema007:
"You are a woman" ehn ehn before nko? I be goat?

But heaven will help you sha if one day you need my input on a matter. Nah then you go explain your " you are a woman" sentence.



No stress at all.

Tallesty1:


Say the truth. E no hard

RightToReject:



Maybe a likely conversation between an inegalitarian man and a woman in a scenario like the following might help you understand better why a woman, whether reasonable or unreasonable, will feel angry when being reminded that she's a woman:

State of the nation as the subject of discussion

- The inegalitarian man - Nigeria can never get better, not now, and not in the future.

- A woman - no, Nigeria might get better someday, after all, no condition is permanent. A good leader can easily turn the fortunes of the country and citizenry around.

- The inegalitarian man - you are a woman.

As you might observe from the conversation above, the inegalitarian man's last interjection wasn't obviously done in good faith, but to debase - of course, his demeanor and/or tone when saying that will definitely convey his true intention. Because he innately holds the belief that a woman is beneath a man in all indices; therefore, he wittingly or unwittingly concludes that she was talking nonsense. Whereas, realistically, from a rational and fair POV, the woman in the conversation made more sense than him.

Tallesty1:
Telling a woman that she's a woman isn't what gets her angry. It is when it was said and how it was said that gets her angry.


If you're in a group of women, broke and in need of cash and someone suddenly starts giving them 100k each.


But when he gets to you he says, dude you're a man and leaves you with nothing, can you in all honesty say that you won't be sad?

Telling a woman that she's a woman most times means shut up, this is not your place or you don't deserve this etc.

Say the truth. E no hard

CumOnHer:

I found your choice of " inegalitarian" as an inappropriate description. Let's broaden the argument a bit. If you substitute the " inegalitarian man" for a "woman" and make the conversation a " woman to woman" conversation, would the outcome/reaction have been the same?

pocohantas:


You think he doesn’t know?

Men and their usual mansplaining. Always looking for who to gaslight with offensive questions disguised as logical-curious-questions.

Why doesn’t he remind his mother and female bosses of their gender when putting things to them. Mtcheeew

Mariangeles:


The question is would a woman say that to another woman during such a conversation?
Or you just dey find talk where talk no dey?
Iwo gan ro naa. Would it make any sense?

eyinjuege:
It sounds patronising.
Majority of people do not like to be patronised .
My reply to such depends on my mood e.g
"really, I could've sworn I was hermaphrodite " or
" Einstein, you've just discovered what the world didn't know" or
"And so?" or
Just ignore because I don't have energy to talk.
But if it's your own way of making petty talk, I still don't have energy. No vex

CumOnHer:

Some men are trying to patronize women on this thread but it's all good tho.
Have you considered that a broke man in the midst of a group of broke women would not get angry at being denied some wad of cash much as he would be when denied a 100k in the midst of a group of broke men.
I wouldn't be angry when I am being reminded that I am a man in the midst of women but would scatter the table when you denied me what's meant for me in the midst of my fellow men.

A clearer example is when a coat that is meant for a man, during cold season is passed on to a woman for warmth. During a cold season, when a boy or a man is told that "you're a man", give the coats to the women. No eyebrows is raised. The men suffer the cold to the chest just because they are men while the women hangs the coat around the chest just because they are women.

A man in the midst of women is already at a disadvantage, meanwhile in the midst of his fellow men, it is the survival of the fittest.

CumOnHer:

Some men are trying to patronize women on this thread but it's all good tho.
Have you considered that a broke man in the midst of a group of broke women would not get angry at being denied some wad of cash much as he would be when denied a 100k in the midst of a group of broke men.
I wouldn't be angry when I am being reminded that I am a man in the midst of women but would scatter the table when you denied me what's meant for me in the midst of my fellow men.

A clearer example is when a coat that is meant for a man, during cold season is passed on to a woman for warmth. During a cold season, when a boy or a man is told that "you're a man", give the coats to the women. No eyebrows is raised. The men suffer the cold to the chest just because they are men while the women hangs the coat around the chest just because they are women.

A man in the midst of women is already at a disadvantage, meanwhile in the midst of his fellow men, it is the survival of the fittest.

Tallesty1:


Say the truth. E no hard

Mariangeles:


Ok. Wetin be your issue with women gangan? Because this your conversation don enter another dimension.

CumOnHer:

I thought we're discussing a topic