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Why I Won't Allow My Brother To Bring His Wife Abroad- Nigerian Lady, Arike(vid) / Should I Allow My Mother-in-law In Our Home? I Need Advice / Don't Marry Me If You Won't Allow My Relations To Stay Or Visit Me. (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Foodqueen(f): 3:03pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Francis609: Don't allow her. I see no reason why you should lie. U can tell her straight that you don't want her near your family. She's too wicked 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by jesmond3945: 4:02pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Francis609:i beg to differ. This is your biological mother. The only person she hates is your wife and not your kids. This is not new. Mother in laws and daughter in laws na cat and dog. The issue is this, if your wife knows that your mum wished her death, she would never forgive your mother. That means if she comes over, they would not get along. So it behoves on your mother to ask for forgiveness and truly repent before your wife. As for your step mum she is just playing to the gallery. That she is helping out doesn't mean she loves your kids more than your mum. She might be exploiting the situation since she knows your mum has been barred. What I will tell you, work on your mum to reconcile with your wife and take up her leading role as granny. Dont lie to her, let her come. If she misbehaves you can always tell her to stop or go back home to her husband. 8 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by dannex4adx(m): 4:07pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Francis609: Bro, there are some missing links in your story. You didn't state what happened between your mother and your wife/ you that she would be wishing her dead. As for the visiting be wise about it , pray to God to direct you. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by eyinjuege: 4:10pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Run from her. She is toxic. I hope your wife doesn't allow your children go near her, even for a visit. Anyone that wishes me dead and my children motherless, cannot love my children. It's not possible I'm sure she wants to come and poison the twins in that 1 month she plans to come, but God pass her 8 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by jesmond3945: 4:12pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Foodqueen:too wicked that she cannot be forgiven? |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Francis609: 4:15pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
dannex4adx: She hates her because she is from the same tribe as my dad. She wanted me to marry a lady from her tribe. she also thinks she is ugly and will give birth to ugly kids. 9 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Kobojunkiee: 4:17pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
dannex4adx:There is absolutely no logical reason for a mother to wish death on a daughter-in-law. 3 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by jesmond3945: 4:17pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
InTheCloudySky:nawa o. Even when the mum asks for forgiveness? |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Kobojunkiee: 4:20pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
jesmond3945:The OP doesn't even sound like he holds a grudge against his mother. Only that he is cautious of the fact that things might not work out well if the women is brought in close contact with his wife whom she, the mother, seems to hate not for any real fault of her, the wife's, own. 7 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Double0h7(f): 4:33pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
It seems your mother has a problem with your wife and you've picked your wife so be a man and tell your mother that. Don't lie and hide but explain to your mother the situation on ground and give her the opportunity to fix it or to go her own way. Be a man and stay true to your principles. Your mother wants what's best for you but her execution is wrong but her intentions are pure. She believes that a woman from her tribe would treat you better since from her experience your father's tribe treated her poorly. She really does mean well. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by jesmond3945: 4:36pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Kobojunkiee:thats why i said he needs to work on reconciling both of them for the future of the family. Thats only if the mum is sober and willing. If you ask the mum why she hates the wife, she would say nothing. That she just feels hate towards her. You women arr very very funny. |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Kobojunkiee: 4:39pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
jesmond3945:I don't understand at all. You didn't explain why exactly this reconciliation you suggest is even necessary on his part. If the mother decides, of her own, to change then sure, she can initiate reconciliation moves. Else, the man should pay attention on his family and bigger things, keeping his toxic mother away from their lives in the meantime. |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by jesmond3945: 4:42pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Kobojunkiee:is just the hate in her heart, probably because of the past. |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Kobojunkiee: 4:45pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
jesmond3945:Look, any adult who can't separate her past from the present and others around is potentially dangerous to be around... and I am speaking mentally and emotionally at least. |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by jesmond3945: 4:46pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Kobojunkiee:no matter what, she always be his mother. If he didn't care he would be writing a thread about it. He has every right to barr her because of the treatment towards the wife. However, he still needs the mother in the life of his kids. The joy of every son is to give his mother grand kids. Thats why for his peace of mind, he should kickstart it on the condition that the mum has changed |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by jesmond3945: 4:50pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Kobojunkiee:yes you are right. However, we all are a product of our past. The way you relate with people now depends on how they treated you in the past. |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by anthonyuncle(m): 4:52pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
you did the right thing, but your mum might still come irrespective of what you told me |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Biglittlelois(f): 5:06pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
jesmond3945: Why is it so difficult for some of you to realise that strangers can be more human than family or blood? That is because their conscience is working 100%, The step mum came to help, it is suprising because step mums has been known and stigmatized as being the evil, jealous, envious witch, it is not possible for her to really care, SMH Pls go through his other threads to know the kind of mother he has, that woman shouldn't be allowed near his family. 20 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Kobojunkiee: 5:06pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
jesmond3945:But your statement there in bold does not apply to all sons, nor all daughters - it is wrong to generalize these things, and allow individuals do what best fits there situation in this. 2 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Kobojunkiee: 5:08pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
jesmond3945:That we are all a product of our past is no reason for us to demonize others by it. And no, the way I treat people now does not depend on how they treated me in the past. So, again, it is wrong to generalize even when it comes to issues of mental and emotional maturity. 3 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Biglittlelois(f): 5:09pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Double0h7: 8 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Nobody: 5:11pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Romanoff(f): 5:27pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Francis609: That woman will harm your kids. 4 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by HeyHey(f): 6:36pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Romanoff: She will. This is sure. Person when fit talk say the kids will be ugly, if you allow her come prepare for thorough criticism of your children. If they look like your wife, better tell her not to come without mincing words 3 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by dannex4adx(m): 7:00pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Kobojunkiee: What's your own? Was I referring to you? |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by dannex4adx(m): 7:01pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Francis609: Ohk I see. |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Jamesbiodun(m): 8:14pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
You are about to bring tension in your family and a very big fight coz with your stepmom been there na big gbese coz you mom will be thinking she is letting you stay away from her... You should have invited your wife mother instead, invite your mother and let her stay just give her strict warning and why you don't want her to come.... If you don't want your mum to come better let your stepmom leave to know peace |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by LilMissFavvy(f): 9:34pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Did I just see people suggest to the OP to inform his mom that the step mom came for umugwo? . The OP should not try it. You should never let her know that your step mom is with you. Your mom would feel totally shattered knowing that you prefer your step mom. 8 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by NoToPile: 10:59pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Francis609: Bros I remember your threads and you have done the right thing. She's with her sister excuse is perfect. Now 2 things. 1. Don't ever let her have access to your wife and children, in fact don't let her come to your house now or in the nearest future. God will give you the wisdom to continue dodging her, like you have done in this case. No be fight oo, just avoid her completely. Honor her from afar. Someone with this level of hate can harm the kids just to hurt your wife. This is a life or death matter oo, not just mother inlaw versus wife bickering. Be wise and smart 2. Don't let her know your step mum was the one who took care of the mother and babies. Simple. Time will take care of the rest. 4 Likes |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Mindlog: 11:19pm On Apr 02, 2022 |
Your mother has no business being in your home. She wished your wife death when you both lost your baby, so it will be irrational for anyone to expect your wife to feel comfortable with your mother coming near the babies. Don't invite trouble into your home because she is not intending visiting with a remorseful heart. 1 Like |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by Richy4(m): 1:48am On Apr 03, 2022 |
Actually, U were the one putting yourself into an unnecessary pressure... why would you lie to her in the first place when you have sorted the babysitting aspect out? You said you have disowned her... And you still find the need to tell lies...Or is there something I'm missing here? or should I google to double check the meaning of disown for myself? |
Re: Should I Allow My Mum To Visit Us by frozen70(f): 5:50am On Apr 03, 2022 |
Francis609: This is a very tactical issue You have to cover up your step mum visit to your house if she gets to know about that then she will have war with your step mom Well for you mum just make sure she doesn't know your address because of she knows she can come over with out invitation I think you need to go for a cover up prayer before inviting her Then wait till the children grow up, before you can decide whether to invite her or not You can even tell her that your wife job have taken her out of the house so she is else where and it's not conducive for her to visit her there for the meantime 1 Like |
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