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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria (35487 Views)
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Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Tuns20(m): 2:17pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie: In my humble opinion sir, This is a dicey situation..In as much as your life is paramount and nothing at all should put you in harm’s way, you can talk to your parents about your fears and I feel they should reason along with you because of the insecurity in the nation and draft out a plan B as adults.They can call your woman’s family and you’ll be surprised at the conclusion that they’ll reach in as much as they also want to have you as a in-law..Then everybody can be happy and peace will reign..But if the parents family refuses bluntly..Then your cause to break up with her is justified because if you DIE in the cause of traveling to do her marriage rites due to this insecurity..You’ll regret in your grave not only that,You’ll DIE and that same parents will tell her to move on and marry another MAN…That’s my advice |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by adebayo987: 2:20pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie:what has happened to video calls over zoom? Let them know you're security conscious. They'll even be happy for that. There's flight and another option to hire police convoy when your family is going there. Think!!! |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by jubrilELsudan: 2:20pm On May 03, 2022 |
blazingblender: YOU ARE A COMPLETE IDIOT AND AN ARSEH0LE. IT'S VERY OBVIOUS YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN OUT OF YOUR VILLAGE TALK MORE OF YOUR STATE IF YOU HAVE LIVED ABROAD, YOU WILL KNOW WHAT HE TALKING ABOUT. THE PROBLEM WITH YOU IS THE TYPICAL NIGERIAN MENTALITY OF JEALOUSY, ENVY, HATE, INFERIORITY COMPLEX AND EVERYTHING EVIL YOU NIGERIANS HAVE FOR NIGERIANS WHO HAVE LIVED ABROAD AND ARE BACK IN NIGERIA. MAY YOUR BAD BELLE CONSUME YOU.
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Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Nobody: 2:20pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie: Travel nonetheless to go see her. You can a mopol officer or soldier or even police just to escort you. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Nobody: 2:22pm On May 03, 2022 |
blazingblender: E shock me sef. Anything is being pushed to front page on nairaland. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by skywalker240(m): 2:23pm On May 03, 2022 |
Virgin? In Nigeria? |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by ImpactBooks: 2:25pm On May 03, 2022 |
Well, In all fairness to you Op, having lived abroad for some time should be enough reason for you to be fearful of traveling on Nigerian roads. Your reason may sounds petty but he who wears the shoe knows where it pinches. By the way, it's funny how some people regard Nigerian roads very fearful. Going by the nature of my job, I do transverse the length and breadth of the country by road more than anything. There is hardly any month I won't be on Nigeria roads for a minimum of two weeks: North-South-East-West. Infact, the last trip I made lasted 3 weeks as follows: Lagos - Owerri Owerri - Abuja Abuja - Kano Kano -. Minna Minna - Abuja Abuja - Calabar Calabar - Uyo Uyo - Benin Benin - Abuja Abuja - Lagos All trips were made by ROAD to the glory of God. Infact, in the next one week, I will be on the road again for another two weeks as follows: Lagos - Porthacourt Porthacourt - Calabar Calabar - Uyo Uyo - Umuahia (Abia) Umuahia - Enugu Enugu - Abuja Abuja - Kano Kano - Kaduna Kaduna - Abuja Abuja - Kano These trips will.be made by ROAD. On a lighter mood, it's mind-buggling that an average Nigerian now has fear for Kidnapping than accident. In conclusion, what is very important is that one should have a positive mindset when planning to travel on Nigeria roads. More so, start your journey early in the morning so that you can arrive at your destination early enough. Op, abeg na once man pickin dey die o. Go see your babe! If road dey fear you take flight. And if all these options no suit you, allow another man take control of the innocent girl timely enough. Last last, it's gonna be a win-win situation for both of you. Cheers! |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Legendrysailor(m): 2:27pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie: |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Holluwhakemmy(f): 2:29pm On May 03, 2022 |
These are not genuine reasons we are all managing here in Nigeria, try and adapt no more room for any phobia |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Jmichael1(m): 2:29pm On May 03, 2022 |
As long as am concern,dis story no complete.,.. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Legendrysailor(m): 2:29pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie: I totally understand u bro, but tell her to see if she can convince her parents with the issues u outlined (phobia for traveling out of ur city). Breaking up with her for the reason u just outlined is totally harsh, I believe u have a sister bro and u wouldn't want a guy to treat her like that 2 Likes |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by iTommie(m): 2:30pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie: Don’t mind the guy. I’ve been in the same situation, and I understand your fear. However, you can just summon courage, pray and embark on the journey if you really love her. 1 Like |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by jubrilELsudan: 2:30pm On May 03, 2022 |
I UNDERSTAND WHERE YOU COMING FROM. I HAVE LIVED ABROAD FOR 20 YEARS AND BACK IN NIGERIA NOW FOR THE PAST 4 YEARS AND JUST TO DRIVE UP MY STREET IS STILL A CHALLENGE. I CAN'T EVEN STAND ON MY STREET ALONE WITHOUT A FAMILY MEMBER WITH ME CAUSE I DON'T FEEL SAFE. I ALSO HAVE NEVER TRAVELLED ANYWHERE BY ROAD. I PERFECTLY UNDERSTAND WHERE YOU COMING FROM BUT DON'T BREAK UP WITH HER. MAKE HER AND HER FAMILY COME TO YOU AFTER ALL IF YOU WERE TO BE FROM A VERY WELL KNOWN INFLUENTIAL FAMILY, IT'S EVEN HER PARENTS THAT WILL BE BEGGING TO COME TO YOUR PLACE. 1 Like
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Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by cooooooks(m): 2:32pm On May 03, 2022 |
Nonsensical statement. oldienavie: Fear of road travel is real & valid in Nigeria. Could they come to the city? Could you travel exclusively in the day? oldienavie: 1 Like |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by NamelessOGBENI(m): 2:33pm On May 03, 2022 |
Let me pitch my tent in Gombe and see how it goes. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by tonididdy(m): 2:34pm On May 03, 2022 |
blazingblender:.you are just yapping dust, be like that Nigeria safe for you I for one will never travel on certain Nigerian routes. I not risk am. @OP stick to your guns, if distance is a barrier and road transport another obstacle. Call the relationship quit if she isn't willing to relocate. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by frozen70(f): 2:36pm On May 03, 2022 |
iamdapsyj: My dear, I pity the girl but I blame the man not his parents He is the one that will wear the shoe not his parents If he realy loves her. He can bring her over there and the parents can do the needful on his behalf Security is in God's hand not human |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by greatfucker: 2:36pm On May 03, 2022 |
u sound really immature abeg go and see down jare |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by abbey621(m): 2:37pm On May 03, 2022 |
Smelly talk....You date someone for 3 months, she's a virgin, she's perfect but you want to break up because of bad Nigerian roads. Within those 3 months she no tell you where she came from, you didn't realize you would have to go and see her parents, it never crossed your mind before discussing marriage. Who dey write una script? Oga come out with your full chest and say that you're just not into the girl instead of making up silly excuses. If truly you're abroad then you know the power of police escort, if truly you love the girl then you know there are always ways to minimize the risk, tired of men behaving like overgrown kids, MAN UP or SHUT UP! |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by LollySeaSide: 2:37pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie:Send me her number let me tell her on your behalf. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by walexbiz(m): 2:38pm On May 03, 2022 |
Don't let anybody fool you with love, their is high level of insecurity in Nigeria and if you get Kidnapped or killed it's your doing. Pls should any misfortune should overtake you, your family would bear the brunt of it and the lady family would advise her to move on. I would advise if you call the lady's family if they can set up meeting in your state of residence or adjoining state for the introduction. Pls note you don't have more than one life and if anything bedevilled you, you are on your own. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by obua: 2:38pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie:Reduce the travel frequency and if you can afford it pay for amoured vehicle and or armed police or military escort. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Oyiboman69: 2:40pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie:tell her to visit you through flight or road so that she'll stay for some days and return. when it get to introduction, take two of your family members through flight and then the remaining one hour drive as you stated,and your next visit should be marriage with the same amount of two people. you want to marry not to go on a suicide journey and besides, long distance kill relationship, yours is not the first and won't be the last.... |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by dhanniel2(m): 2:40pm On May 03, 2022 |
I'll use a friend as an example, his wife is from the North Central and he had to employ the services of armed security personnel when he got married in early 2020. The policemen manned each vehicle that were used. If you feel that your relationship is worth it and you have the financial capacity, you need to take care of your safety and that of your families that would embark on these journeys. My friend is Happily married now to the love of his life, but he is restricting his wife from travelling to the North Central for any form of occasion. I wish you well. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Connected1: 2:41pm On May 03, 2022 |
You are a Weak Man I must say. Ordinary Travelling by road that people do here every day that what's you are complaining about, I have a phobia for heights but yet I go on storey buildings, I have fears but my destination and mission is paramount to my fears, if you really love this good girl ( I wonder where you take see good girl for Naija, na juju you use) then I am sure that's a piece of cake. What if her car broke down on the road on one of these kidnapping hotspots in Kaduna, then you will just abandon her like that to her fate. You are just capping, you didn't even give up the road location so we can tell you if it's safe or not, Kidnapping on the roads is limited to some places in Nigeria. Moreover if you have money then it's a piece of cake, just hire security gan or do what other Nigerians are doing. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by braine(m): 2:49pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie: Your fears are legit, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Nigerian roads are a mess, plus the insecurity. But then, what must be done, must be done. You can hire private security if you can afford it. Marriage is done once (at least), so it may be worth the investment. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Officialbayo(m): 2:52pm On May 03, 2022 |
Baba if that's the case, why don't you keep calm or try and do zoom meeting with them and assure them rather than traveling down to her place because of your weird excuse (phobia) �. Wo let me tell you, count yourself lucky to have found a loyal, and good girl in Naija now. You better stick to her, or else you will lose a diamond while trying to find a mere stone. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by MyChoice1: 2:53pm On May 03, 2022 |
oldienavie: You have a valid point to be scared. It's one thing to love and another thing to be realistic to what operates within your environment. Recently I read online about a soldier who resigned from his work because of his love affair with his fiancee, and lately upon taking his whole family to the East for wedding things, UGM attacked and killed him and his lady. His family members are now in captivity! Tell me now, was that love venture beneficial to that man in any way? Use your head, because tomorrow the woman will use it as a case that you don't visit her parents bla bla bla hence you don't love her...shor! She will definitely be taking her kids to visit her parents, will you stop her? Use your head bro. Plenty good girls still dey, don't be deceived. |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by luluosas(m): 2:54pm On May 03, 2022 |
Shut up there. Were you married before? Ashawo |
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by rickleye: 2:56pm On May 03, 2022 |
Dude I share your phobia ! Don't take some posts personal - they are meant to gainer "likes" As you know there are many phobia's - I cannot drive across a bridge to nowhere ( like the Chesapeake bridge in Virginia) I almost passed out with water for km's and no land & The other is one is fear of being trapped. So I can no longer sit in the window seat of an airplane anymore. I have to sit in aisle or exit seat. I cannot sit in the 3rd row seat of a van - I feel trapped . I cannot sit in the middle back seat of a passenger vehicle. I ride shot gun or by either window. The above is just to give context that i know what you are feeling. Now, for this particular one. You are going to have to plan it and it might be expensive. 1. Travel with trusted relatives to see the parents. 2. Travel by day - Travel in a group. 3. Start some short trips with some coping mechanism - Maybe Lagos to Ibadan ( Get a headset with some calming music and or take Valium ) 4. There is something called exposure response technique ( ERT or ERP) - where you go on short trips and with self assurance words or phrases " All is well " " You can do it" 5. Get an Police escort. 6. Give conflicting times - So If I were you. Ill tell people, I will be there on the 6th, I arrive a day or two earlier. Now, there is a 7th option Have a stand-in go on your behalf. When my brother was getting married - he was in Seattle WA and I was somewhere aboard . His wife to be was in Nigeria. I told him to find someone aboard but he wanted someone like mum -someone cultured, respectful , smart etc so he was found a wife back home. The traditional marriage was set on a particular date . Prior my parents made the trip down to the village of the bride on his behalf . A 4-6 hour trip to the South-East. They took a frame picture of him along with them. ( Now the dude was defending his thesis, so he couldn't go and I decided to stand in for him) So there are choices - don't let a good one get away. Good luck |
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