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Please Help Save My Marriage - Family - Nairaland

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What I Learnt From A Wedding Anniversary That Could Help Save Marriages Today / Sex Is Causing Problems In My Marriage, Help Me Save My Marriage / Should I Save My Marriage Or Let Go? (2) (3) (4)

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Please Help Save My Marriage by newold: 5:25pm On Aug 27, 2022
I decided to create a new account to make these post.

To make the long story short.

I never realised what i was getting myself into until i started googling and then discovered what i had gotten myself into. This has rendered me hopeless, almost useless, and broke.

Since 2020 until now, i have only laboured in vain. i became unable to take proper care and provide for my family not because i don't get paid from work (i do have a work which i do) though the pay does not come every time. Greed, wanting more i would say has lead me to these part that is about to break and destroy me completely.

I have a very loving and hardworking wife, who has saved me countless number of times. i have broken her hearts by these singular addiction. i have tried several ways to stop. but once money gets into my hand the first thing that comes to my mind is to feed my addiction.

Most times i cry alone in the house and wished i could turn back the hand of time. I have felt depressed, lost weights, and my confidence, and the suicidal thoughts as deep down i know i should be better, i should do better for my wife and child.

i lost everything to these monster, my car, my peace, my respects, even some friends.

since 2020 now, i have no savings, infact i empty my account in less than 24 hours because of my greed.

on several occasions i have used the money meant for purchasing another car since after i sold the other one. i spent the money to feed these my monster.

even when i WIN i lose it all back. just 3 months ago. i had lost almost #2m. these happen within 2 days.

I am slowly dyeing inside. when i look at my child and my wife and what my actions have put them through. and for the fact that i keep going back. i then feel there might be something else wrong with me.


I have followed some forums for help but i keep going back. please and please if you know how or what to say to me that will help my situation please do.


PLEASE FOR ANYONE WHO WILL BE READING THESE.

ALWAYS SAY NO TO GAMBLING.

IF YOU HAVE NEVER GAMBLED BEFORE. BPLEASE IS BETTER YOU DON'T TRY SO AS NOT TO EXPERIENCE WHAT MILLIONS ALL OVER THE WORLD ARE GOING THROUGH, INCLUDING ME

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Kobojunkie: 5:41pm On Aug 27, 2022
newold:
I am slowly dyeing inside. when i look at my child and my wife and what my actions have put them through. and for the fact that i keep going back. i then feel there might be something else wrong with me. I have followed some forums for help but i keep going back. please and please if you know how or what to say to me that will help my situation please do.
PLEASE FOR ANYONE WHO WILL BE READING THESE.
ALWAYS SAY NO TO GAMBLING.

IF YOU HAVE NEVER GAMBLED BEFORE. BPLEASE IS BETTER YOU DON'T TRY SO AS NOT TO EXPERIENCE WHAT MILLIONS ALL OVER THE WORLD ARE GOING THROUGH, INCLUDING ME
First thing first, if you haven't already informed your wife and family about your problem, I suggest you do so immediately as they are the only ones who can provide you with the necessary support you may need to help you quit from this point on. Your wife needs to realize what it is that is going on with you.... it is her right as your partner in marriage to know these things. Hopefully, from there you both can work towards a solution together as a couple. undecided

Second, addiction is most likely the problem here and it is a mental illness that requires treatment. Consider seriously seeking help from a professional mental health therapist or a psychiatrist as soon as possible. With the help of family members, you can beat addiction or at least take the reigns back from it in order to manage your life better. undecided

Third, look into finding a local clinic or any mental health facility with a good track record that offers Ibogaine therapy for addiction, and try to get yourself the treatment as soon as you can afford it . https://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-17666589

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Mrkumareze(m): 5:48pm On Aug 27, 2022
Oga, take decision. You can do it

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Righteousness2(m): 5:49pm On Aug 27, 2022
When we say Gambling is a Spirit and I see people argue, I just nod my head in pity.

Gambling is not just a Spirit, it is a wicked spirit that has rendered people Homeless, worthless , useless, Debt ridden and dead.

You need a Genuie Encounter with JESUS. That is the starting point. You also need a total overhaul of your spirit, soul and Body in Christ. Until the Spirit is cast out , you may keep returning back.
I recommend that you visit the Lords Chosen and Begin to fellowship . Listen to the word of GOD, practice what you are taught and Just say amen to prayers. That wicked spirit will find its way out of you.

122 Likes 8 Shares

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Unzerious: 5:57pm On Aug 27, 2022
donaldking100:
vote for Peter Obi, & all your problems would be over.

How

100 years for you Kamrade! tongue

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by superCleanworks(m): 5:58pm On Aug 27, 2022
newold:
I decided to create a new account to make these post.
Elon musk refused to buy twitter because of fake accounts. He should come and see Nairaland where you can just sneeze and a new account will be opened.

As for you mr newold, you will still gamble after all this epistle. You know this.

49 Likes 9 Shares

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 6:02pm On Aug 27, 2022
superCleanworks:

Elon musk refused to buy twitter because of fake accounts. He should come and see Nairaland where you can just sneeze and a new account will be opened.

As for you mr newold, you will still gamble after all this epistle. You know this.

Hahaha is that all you gonna say. grin grin grin

10 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Blackdeewhy(m): 6:07pm On Aug 27, 2022
It's simple YOU ARE SELFISH
Tell your wife every single thing going on with you if you are serious about getting redeemed.
Then seek professional help.
Visit government hospital, you will be surprised the psychologist might not charge up to 10k.
I hope you get all the help you need.
Please don't think of suicides cause of your child.
App the best

16 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 6:08pm On Aug 27, 2022
Kobojunkie:

Second, addiction is most likely the problem here and it is a mental illness that requires treatment. Consider seriously seeking help from a professional mental health therapist or a psychiatrist as soon as possible. With the help of family members, you can beat addiction or at least take the reigns back from it in order to manage your life better. undecided

Kobojunkie I don't believe this addiction is a mental illness. The OP and others like him always know what they are doing, it is greed pure and simple like he said. It is greed and love for quick money, there's nothing mentally amiss with him.

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by gaby(m): 6:09pm On Aug 27, 2022
Hmmm

Gambling addiction is demonic.

The only real winners in gambling are the Booker's.

22 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Kobojunkie: 6:19pm On Aug 27, 2022
Melap:


Kobojunkie I don't believe this addiction is a mental illness. The OP and others like him always know what they are doing, it is greed pure and simple like he said. It is greed and love for quick money, there's nothing mentally amiss with him.
Check out psychiatry.org

https://psychiatry.org/patients-families/gambling-disorder/what-is-gambling-disorder

2 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by kernniejay(m): 6:24pm On Aug 27, 2022
Gambling can never give you true riches. Even if you win and become rich, all the money will still likely go back to where they came from. Gambling is foolish, those companies collect money from millions of foolish people to reward very few foolish people. Gambling companies should have folded up if everyone wins everyday. Rather, the companies keep using foolish people's money to establish other branches and collect more money from more foolish people.

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by ValCon888: 6:31pm On Aug 27, 2022
Melap:


Kobojunkie I don't believe this addiction is a mental illness. The OP and others like him always know what they are doing, it is greed pure and simple like he said. It is greed and love for quick money, there's nothing mentally amiss with him.

It's not only greed. Gambling triggers a release of dopamine in the brain that's like taking hard drugs.

So long as money keeps entering his hand, he'll continue to chase that high.

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Stallionhorse: 6:31pm On Aug 27, 2022
Gambling is not a bad thing.. We all play gble every weekend last week I lost 8k this week I just won 27k tomorrow I might win again. Just use your head.. Don't be a mum u man.

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 6:37pm On Aug 27, 2022
ValCon888:


It's not only greed. Gambling triggers a release of dopamine in the brain that's like taking hard drugs.

So long as money keeps entering his hand, he'll continue to chase that high.

Kobojunkie:
Check out psychiatry.org

https://psychiatry.org/patients-families/gambling-disorder/what-is-gambling-disorder

Okay but I am still not buying it. Kobo I did not open or read the link. In Africa they call gambling demonic like someone has done above, in obodo they call it mental illness but gamblers know it is not village people or mental illness. They know what they are doing

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 6:46pm On Aug 27, 2022
Stallionhorse:
Gambling is not a bad thing.. We all play gble every weekend last week I lost 8k this week I just won 27k tomorrow I might win again. Just use your head.. Don't be a mum u man.

Will you say you have an addiction, mental illness or demonic influence when you play, as per the posts above saying gambling addiction is a mental illness? Na question don't misunderstand me

3 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Kobojunkie: 6:48pm On Aug 27, 2022
Melap:
Okay but I am still not buying it. Kobo I did not open or read the link. In Africa they call gambling demonic like someone has done above, in obodo they call it mental illness but gamblers know it is not village people or mental illness. They know what they are doing
Gambling addiction is a mental disorder much like alcohol or drug addiction that can be resolved or treated by using drugs that adequately tweak brain chemistry to achieving desired result. There is nothing demonic about that. undecided

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Mindlog: 8:51pm On Aug 27, 2022
Melap:


Kobojunkie I don't believe this addiction is a mental illness. The OP and others like him always know what they are doing, it is greed pure and simple like he said. It is greed and love for quick money, there's nothing mentally amiss with him.

Gambling is a mental disorder, also recognized as such by the World Health Organization.

Read up on the neurobiology of gambling, to have an insight of what goes in the brain of a gambler.

7 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 9:15pm On Aug 27, 2022
2 odds won me almost 8 million today, gamble with sense and enjoy your moolah.

PS I have no wife or kids

2 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by juri: 9:58pm On Aug 27, 2022
@ newold, your situation is very critical and requires serious approach. Before I even recommend you go for prayers, let start by advicing you do the following.

1. Open up to your wife and explain to her clearly and openly your gambling addiction and how it is affecting your finance.

2. Make your wife the sole signatory to even your own account ( I am very serious here) where your salaries or income will be going to or even outrightly going to her directly. A simple mandate letter to the bank will take care of this. Make it for now, a 2 years mandate, in which case, for the next 2 years, your wife operates your account and handles all finances including any source of income accruing from your end

3. Destroy all ATM cards with you and do not open any account. Don't just filled your hands and say you are addicted. Take responsible actions.

4. Finally, as a family, pray together concerning this addiction and seek councelling from reliable people, spiritual and circular.

May God have mercy on you and deliver you in Jesus Mighty name. AMEN.

19 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 10:21pm On Aug 27, 2022
Antimarraige:
2 odds won me almost 8 million today, gamble with sense and enjoy your moolah.

PS I have no wife or kids

You want to drive the OP to depression and suicide with this post of your winnings. You mean you use your 360k to bet or the site gave you 360k as bonus deposit? You get mind

What am I seeing shocked is it 3.6 million you used to stake or is it me that does not understand what I am seeing.

17 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 10:31pm On Aug 27, 2022
Kobojunkie:
Gambling addiction is a mental disorder much like alcohol or drug addiction that can be resolved or treated by using drugs that adequately tweak brain chemistry to achieving desired result. There is nothing demonic about that. undecided

Kobo kobo call it what you like. The gamblers know what is worrying them. The same way you said there is nothing demonic about it, I say there is nothing mentally disordered about it.

6 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Goddeywithme: 10:35pm On Aug 27, 2022
Righteousness2:
When we say Gambling is a Spirit and I see people argue, I just nod my head in pity.

Gambling is not just a Spirit, it is a wicked spirit that has rendered people Homeless, worthless , useless, Debt ridden and dead.

You need a Genuie Encounter with JESUS. That is the starting point. You also need a total overhaul of your spirit, soul and Body in Christ. Until the Spirit is cast out , you may keep returning back.
I recommend that you visit the Lords Chosen and Begin to fellowship . Listen to the word of GOD, practice what you are taught and Just say amen to prayers. That wicked spirit will find its way out of you.

There is no spirit. It is just habit. Stop spiritualising everything. Rubbish

10 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Kobojunkie: 10:42pm On Aug 27, 2022
Melap:
Kobo kobo call it what you like. The gamblers know what is worrying them. The same way you said there is nothing demonic about it, I say there is nothing mentally disordered about it.
I gamble but I am not a gambling addict since I know I can stop when I want to and I do. However, a person with an addiction problem is of a different breed entirely, and that is what that website there is meant to help you see. undecided

And when I say it isn't demonic what I mean is that addiction problems can be corrected by using physical drugs to treat what are physical chemical imbalance in the physical brain. That which is considered demonic is that impacted by that which cannot be seen or perceived with any of our physical senses after all. undecided

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 10:47pm On Aug 27, 2022
Kobojunkie:
I gamble but I am not a gambling addict since I know I can stop when I want to and I do. However, a person with an addiction problem is of a different breed entirely. undecided

Nothing more to say. When the OP and others like him are ready, they too will stop. There is nothing wrong with them mentally that needs physical drugs to cure. If you want bring the whole encyclopedia to say otherwise I will still not buy it

5 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Kobojunkie: 10:48pm On Aug 27, 2022
Melap:
Nothing more to say. When the OP and others like him are ready, they too will stop. There is nothing wrong with them mentally that needs physical drugs to cure. If you want bring the whole encyclopedia to say otherwise I will still not buy it
Wrong!! OP is an Addict... I am not. undecided

I spent much of my life struggling with mental illness and a level of addiction myself so I can empathize with those who struggle with addiction problems since I know from experience that their struggle is real. You on the other hand don't seem to understand it at all and are unwilling to accept that there are things that are beyond your understanding and that it is OK to accept this. Why not choose to live and let live? undecided

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 10:51pm On Aug 27, 2022
Kobojunkie:
Wrong!! OP is an Addict... I am not. undecided

When the OP is ready he will quit his addiction too. Not by prayers or doctor approved drugs. He will stop the same way he started. Good night Kobo

4 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Kobojunkie: 10:52pm On Aug 27, 2022
Melap:
When the OP is ready he will quit his addiction too. Not by prayers or doctor approved drugs. He will stop the same way he started. Good night Kobo
Again...Wrong!! OP is an Addict... I am not. undecided

I spent much of my life struggling with mental illness and a level of addiction myself so I can empathize with those who struggle with addiction problems since I know from experience that their struggle is real. You on the other hand don't seem to understand it at all and are unwilling to accept that there are things that are beyond your understanding and that it is OK to accept this. Why not choose to live and let live? undecided

6 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 10:55pm On Aug 27, 2022
Kobojunkie:
Again...Wrong!! OP is an Addict... I am not. undecided

I spent much of my life struggling with mental illness and a level of addiction myself so I can empathize with those who struggle with addiction problems since I know from experience that their struggle is real. You on the other hand don't seem to understand it at all and are unwilling to accept that there are things that are beyond your understanding and that it is OK to accept this. Why not choose to live and let live? undecided

You are the one famous for arguing on the forum site grin You should live and let live. You talk your own. I talk my own. Once more good night Kobo. OP will stop gambling when he is ready

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Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Kobojunkie: 10:58pm On Aug 27, 2022
Melap:
You are the one famous for arguing on this site grin. You should live and let live. You talk your own. I talk my own.
It's just that the OP is here asking for help and instead of offering him help, you are blaming him for his addiction. Blame does not help with mental illness in any way or form. It accomplishes the same effect as bullying him. undecided

6 Likes

Re: Please Help Save My Marriage by Nobody: 10:59pm On Aug 27, 2022
Kobojunkie:
It's just that the OP is here asking for help and instead of offering him help, you are blaming him for his addiction. Blame does not help with mental illness in any way or form. undecided

Good night Kobo kiss

5 Likes

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