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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. (3132 Views)
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True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 4:41pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Hi everybody, thank you so much for always coming through. Most of you really give amazing advice in here. (2mins read). Someone reached out to me for help. She has been married for 6years now and blessed with 3kids, two boys and a girl. Here is the issue, her husband needs more kids and she has told him No on several occasions. You might be wondering why she said No… They’re not finding it easy to feed, they’re having an hard time sending their kids to a proper school, she is working to also settle bills but her husband doesn’t care he just wants more kids. They have debt and she is trying to make him understand her reasons. They have had meetings with families but he refused. He reported her to the church and she gave her reasons, she doesn’t want to bring more kids they can’t afford to take care of now. If things get better they can have more but he refused. Now, the man is asking for a divorce if she doesn’t want more kids and he can’t take care of the three kids he has already. She is confused at this point because she can’t afford for the kids by herself and it’s a risk for them to have more kids. She has begged him to understand by he doesn’t want to and if she agrees to have more kids with their situation it will affect her a lot. She sometimes has to beg relatives to feed. If she was your sister what will you advice her to do? Forgive any typography errors you come across. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by duduade: 4:43pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Something is wrong somewhere Abeg 6 Likes |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Irupetepete: 4:44pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
I stopped giving advice on family issues, even I is not finding it funny right anymore 7 Likes |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Helpout12345: 5:07pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Husband needs how many more kids? 1 Like |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by nifemi25(m): 5:08pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
What if her husband decided to marry the second wife since she doesn't want to give him another baby .... Las las she will still be the one to take care of her children all by herself.. .I will only advice her to stand on the ground that she doesn't want another kid again. 2 Likes |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Ed12(m): 7:07pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Blunt and straight If she can deal with the issue of divorce or a case of where the man get another woman pregnant.. The man is truly being insensitive.. but the woman should eventually submit.. 1 Like |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Michelle70(m): 7:12pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
nifemi25:i would advice her to go for family planning without her husband knowing. 4 Likes |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by tensazangetsu20(m): 7:16pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Where do you guys see such animals to marry sef 12 Likes |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by efficiencie(m): 7:29pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Wittyglam: Report the matter to a respected clergyman. Report the matter to his family. Report the matter to GOD. If symptoms persist after 1 week, run ohh...he could rape you and force to commit murder in the name of abortion. Sorry madam, you succeeded in marrying your enemy. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Karleb(m): 7:31pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Let the man have his way, it's up to you to decide if you want to have a baby or not. Contraceptive is cheaper than baby food last time I checked. 2 Likes |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by tensazangetsu20(m): 7:34pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Karleb: Such men will even take a second wife. She shouldn't have married such a man in the first place. I wonder the kind of questions people ask themselves when dating or it's only to knack and eat ice cream 1 Like |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 7:59pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
efficiencie:okay |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:00pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
tensazangetsu20:she never saw this side of him as they never spoke about it before marriage. I tell people to talk about a lot of things before marriage. 1 Like |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:01pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Karleb:she is not refusing him sex but she is taking measures to prevent having a child. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:02pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
duduade:that is why I’m seeking advice here to tell her. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:03pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Irupetepete:it’s not easy but there are people you still need to help. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:04pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Helpout12345:she said three and that is a lot. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by tensazangetsu20(m): 8:05pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Wittyglam: This kind of behavior cannot be hidden before marriage. She just chose not to see it. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:05pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
nifemi25:that is what she has been doing but he is threatening to divorce her. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:07pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Ed12:the way she was sounding she is tired and emotionally drained. Three more kids will kill everything. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Karleb(m): 8:08pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
tensazangetsu20: A lot of people are not really getting their priorities right especially when it comes to choice of partners, even friends sef because I believe most relationships start from there. They just do Vibes and insha allah until marriage. It applies to both men and women but I'm surprised how some women are not using their senses. Na woman dey suffer pass for marriage after children 1 Like |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:08pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
tensazangetsu20:Omo, people change. That is why prayer is also necessary in marriage. 1 Like |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:10pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Michelle70:she is on one, that is why she has not had kids. He found out. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:12pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
tensazangetsu20:it will surprise you. people can pretend to achieve their aim. I asked her same thing. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:13pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Karleb:I agree but their are some dangerous pretenders. We just pray for the best. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by faithfull18(f): 8:14pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Something is wrong with that man, he should just say he doesn't want to marry her again instead of this indirect method. Nonsense and irresponsible men. 1 Like |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Michelle70(m): 8:17pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Wittyglam:wait, how did he? |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Mindlog: 8:19pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Wittyglam: Even if he divorces her and marry another woman, having kids with her.....he is still financially obligated to the 3 children she has with him. It reminds me of an episode of that TV series Justice court that is presided over by a Lagos State judge and judgement enforceable. In the episode, the couple have 2 children (I think 9 and 5) and are divorced, the man has already remarried. The man was refusing to provide fully for the 2 children from the first marriage, I was insisting he can only drop N5,000 monthly for only one the children. The judge lambasted him, reminding him it is obligation going by the law of the State that he MUST pay the children fees, healthcare and feeding. That he knows that he was financially struggling and still went ahead to start another family. The ruling was he must continue paying for the children' school fees, healthcare and drop N20,000 monthly for children' feeding. Let her go seek the advisory of the welfare department of the ministry of women and social development of her state to know the enforceable obligations of the husband, should he jump ship. 1 Like |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:22pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Mindlog:thank you so much for this. I will tell her this because most people go scot free and run from their responsibilities since we don’t have a system that works in this country. 1 Like |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:28pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Michelle70:she told him before going for it. When she had her last child, it was not an issue so she told him and they agreed but after a year it became an issue. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by tensazangetsu20(m): 8:29pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
Karleb: I am surprised they don't see this. A man can easily get up and leave after childbirth and the whole thing will be left on the woman. |
Re: True Life Story, I Need Your Honest Opinion. by Wittyglam(f): 8:31pm On Sep 29, 2022 |
faithfull18:Asin and she is trying to make it work but he is making it impossible. I have gotten some amazing advice here. |
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