Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Munzy14(m): 5:56pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
kbower: Hi Nlanders
We all know no marriage is all that smooth and rosey, we all that are in it have challenges here and there, and for almost 11 years now, out of tolerance, ruggedity, minding my business in terms of taking care of the family have always been something that has held my marriage down, because the majority of the issue I have with my wife have always been issues of trust, transparency, accountability, respect and loyalty.
Some people will say with these things I have listed, that I may be asking for too much, but I can tell whoever would reason that way that it's not too much because am a responsible father/husband that have never for once strayed the family in anyway that will make me lack any of the above stated qualities a man can enjoy from a wife.
Why am I here? Ok.. After enduring so much for 11 years, we are relocating to the UK, she is the main applicant, myself and the 3 children are dependants, she traveled first, leaving myself and the 3 kids behind until she can secure accommodation b4 we leave.
I have heard about countless incidences of how SOME women treat their husbands and the POWER zoned to women in that country which makes it almost impossible for a man with a wife that gives him constant problem to be able to thrive in that country.
I just want to state three peculiar incidences that occured during her 1month stay over there that is already making me feel I have alot to face over there, though I know my God is bigger than anything, I just want people that are over there, or people that are experienced here and all over who are capable of handing a good advise for me on getting there to know how I can fare and withstand what is to come.
Based on the above from the major incidences I have experienced with her, first two weeks of being there, she had gone to check a house b4 heading to school, on her way back to school, she claimed she didn't take enough money and going back home might not be possible, I asked how she would wanna go about it and she replied saying I will borrow money from Mr Mike, a man she just met at school on her first day of registration. I was like that's wrong, you don't form familiarity with someone you just met in another man's country, I said I will call a friend in liverpool to send you money and you could get your train ticket. She fumed, but I stood my ground and said that's how its going to be. I have asked her to collect a friends account details, since she has not opened an account yet, she said when her class finishes by 8.30pm she'll request details from her friend so the money can be sent. Fast forward to closing period, I messaged her to send me details, she ignored, I called ad she said nobody has an account that I should not worry she will sort herself, I was now like you just got to that country, u have no friends that u know too well to rely on, I am ur hubby and I opened a way for u to get money easily, yet u didn't make any effort to redeem the opportunity, omo she hung up on me then later called back that she gathered few pennies she had to get the ticket, I was now like why didn't u just say this instead of putting me on pressure over how to get money to convey u all the way from london to Luton, over an hour journey at night.
Secondly, on her next school day, she had previously told me prior to her closing hours that her data has finished and she's using schools wifi, that the moment she steps out from school to head home, she won't be having access to internet, etc WhatsApp and all of that, but importantly was to make use of GPS google map, that's what people over there use to navigate their way in order not to get lost, I was like without internet how do u intend to get to ur destination when u know how stressful it was for u getting lost the other day, now the same statement she made was, I will sort myself. I was raged and said woman I will ask my friend to buy u data so u can get home easy and safe, she said no proble, that she's leaving now, I said well since i wont be able to reach you on whats app, I will definitely call you on normal call shortly to give you the data pin to load. She said no P and hung up.
Moments later, my friend had sent me the data pin, na so I begin dey call wifey oo, over 15 missed calls she nor pick. Later she called back and said her phone was in her laptop bag and her hands were frozen so she couldnt put hands in the bag to pick the call and that she didn't even hear it ring.
The issue I posted up there are issues of not being accountable, and attitude of not showing that you don't need me when its not just about that but for security and your well being knowing fully well you are new in the country and proper guidelines needs to be taken.
Another incident happened 3rd week after her arrival, we were video chatting while she was on a train station waiting for train, next thing I noticed was a guy sitting BEHIND her, the guy boldly took a peep into her phone directly, seemingly trying to see who she was on video call with, immediately i called her attention to it, she just smiled and looked back and said silently, nawa some people for this London nor go mind their business. This very day developed a story that transitioned towards few First cut down on your insecurities..Women worry more and behave best, when you seem to be less interested in her acts. If she knows she has your mumu button, your name is "SORRY".. she will use it to a greater advantage. For now, she is trying to survive...But my best advise to you is to have a plan B which is more of self development to make more money as well..You will need it as things progress..Don't say nobody told you. If you aren't sure of planB over there, You will have to abort mission..Maybe your kids can go while you establish yourself here and visit them over there. It is never a man's way to depend on a woman..She will insult, and make you regret the day you met her..a woman wants to survive at all means in some cases.. If you must go, go because you have something tangible to foot your bills there..Never you ever depend on any woman..forget the love and sweetie, she go show you pepper when the table switch. Lastly, I will never make this kind mistake..If abroad go sup, I will go there, test the waters, secure a niche, create a habitat and bring her and my kids over there...And not the other way.. 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Stenvee: 5:57pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
kbower:
This is exactly what I did over the last 2 days now, and guess what, she has been stalking me with calls. I only call her when there is something important to discuss, but calls based on, i miss u and all of that nor even dey again, the moment she noticed I have drifted from showing affection over calls, she started bombarding me with calls complaining that I dont call her. My dear, be very careful with the advice you heed to online. It can make or mar your home. Most people telling you to ignore her are not even married and do not know the level of commitment that marriage requires. If your home breaks today, they won't be there to help you cope. Choose a suitable time with your wife, call her and talk about all these. Try to be calm and polite, do not judge or accuse her. Let her know your fears and how her actions are making you uncomfortable. If after talking to her, she is still stubborn and not willing to change, you can just stay back in Nigeria and let her know that it was her attitude that made you take such decision. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Amotolongbo(f): 5:58pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
brandsoncharlie:
How can you say he's insecure, it's like you haven't stayed out of Nigeria before and being the first time in a country you tend to make wrong or poor choice if you're not careful. Again that's his wife, he has made a lot of investment over her. to start with, have you ever been outside Nigeria before. My family was in the same shoes with this OP last year. I was outside Nigeria while my spouse was in Nigeria before coming to join me 3months after. He never never felt like this OP at anytime I was here. Please lock your fingers! 3 Likes |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by 43Ronin: 5:58pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
OP I can guarantee you that people mind their biz in UK. Nobody will invade your space to look at who you are talking with on the phone. OP u no be guyman, why u dey jonze? Ignore her, play easy untill you reach uk. Nigerian men dey suffer sha in the hands of their wives abroad. But why they are wilfully suffering I do not know. Leave your wife if she dey jonze or form jandon. I have many oyibo friends that have several families from divorces its not an issue for them. The govt will only calculate ur income and send a portion as child benefit that's all. I have one of my friend that relocated to Canada naso him wife just dey jonze, stopped working and allow the man to carry all the bill on his head. Bill choke the guy. Naso the guy free him wife ooo, dey pay child support but as soji guy he was making money from betting sites averaging 4k monthly non taxable non calculated by govt. 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by loucbou: 5:58pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Guyman, u are very stupid. You shouldn't have let your wife out of your eyes. Shes not the kind of woman to be given such priviledge. There must be ankther way around accomodation issue.
Believe me guyman, she's already cheating on you or she already has the will to cheat sooner or later. Prepare yoir mind for heart shattering actions from her when you eventually land in UK. |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by kennethesan(m): 6:01pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Bros, this is pathetic. She didn't just start being who she is now when she traveled, she has always being like that. You probably just ignored and didn't know.
Hence, She doesn't look like someone you will meet the way she left. However, holding by the side the fact that your relationship might take a sour turn when you get over there with all your narration, just concentrate on get over there but the likelihood that you two don't last together is high save God miraculously intervene. Just play along and get that way first. 3 Likes |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Lastmessenger2: 6:01pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Thinking about your future right now 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Nobody: 6:01pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
What da fuq did I just read? The handwritings are all over the place that she's bored and tired of your relationship with her. I would have typed somethings but let me just respect your Wife.
You too, do you wish to really live in the UK, depending on a Lady? Asides the better opportunities for your Children, I'd rather you remain here if you're presently doing well.
There were lots of endurances in your marriage while she was still here, don't expect such favours abroad. Well, you too can see love and comfort over there, trust me, they are MANY there.
If it's no longer working, y'all should just go your separate ways, so you don't do what could send you to jail or back to Naija (in your boxers). 2 Likes |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by McLizbae: 6:03pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
And you have to quote the whole Op's episode to comment this nonsense? Heathrow44:
U are very stupid, Thats why women are a bit wiser, they have set objectives when they enter into relationships and marriages,.that's how men should be, ur no1 priority is to get to the UK with ur kids as dependants, Start making connections and if its not working BTW u do, u sort urslf out in London, Thats ur main objective, this is a SMO and ur objectives should be ear and precise, dont be distracted, play along till u get to UK 1 Like |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Schifo: 6:03pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
kbower: Hi Nlanders
Hello , Let me bust your chops , going to the Uk with all the alarm bells and whistles would be a living nightmare for you . I recommend you prepare your self emotionally and mentally and pray ceaselessly. If you are Christian , do dangerous prayers from 1-4am for a month or two and ask the Almighty living God to guide and order your steps . Listen attentively and he will reveal to you how to handle the situation and do as he says. Best of luck and remain strong �.
We all know no marriage is all that smooth and rosey, we all that are in it have challenges here and there, and for almost 11 years now, out of tolerance, ruggedity, minding my business in terms of taking care of the family have always been something that has held my marriage down, because the majority of the issue I have with my wife have always been issues of trust, transparency, accountability, respect and loyalty.
Some people will say with these things I have listed, that I may be asking for too much, but I can tell whoever would reason that way that it's not too much because am a responsible father/husband that have never for once strayed the family in anyway that will make me lack any of the above stated qualities a man can enjoy from a wife.
Why am I here? Ok.. After enduring so much for 11 years, we are relocating to the UK, she is the main applicant, myself and the 3 children are dependants, she traveled first, leaving myself and the 3 kids behind until she can secure accommodation b4 we leave.
I have heard about countless incidences of how SOME women treat their husbands and the POWER zoned to women in that country which makes it almost impossible for a man with a wife that gives him constant problem to be able to thrive in that country.
I just want to state three peculiar incidences that occured during her 1month stay over there that is already making me feel I have alot to face over there, though I know my God is bigger than anything, I just want people that are over there, or people that are experienced here and all over who are capable of handing a good advise for me on getting there to know how I can fare and withstand what is to come.
Based on the above from the major incidences I have experienced with her, first two weeks of being there, she had gone to check a house b4 heading to school, on her way back to school, she claimed she didn't take enough money and going back home might not be possible, I asked how she would wanna go about it and she replied saying I will borrow money from Mr Mike, a man she just met at school on her first day of registration. I was like that's wrong, you don't form familiarity with someone you just met in another man's country, I said I will call a friend in liverpool to send you money and you could get your train ticket. She fumed, but I stood my ground and said that's how its going to be. I have asked her to collect a friends account details, since she has not opened an account yet, she said when her class finishes by 8.30pm she'll request details from her friend so the money can be sent. Fast forward to closing period, I messaged her to send me details, she ignored, I called ad she said nobody has an account that I should not worry she will sort herself, I was now like you just got to that country, u have no friends that u know too well to rely on, I am ur hubby and I opened a way for u to get money easily, yet u didn't make any effort to redeem the opportunity, omo she hung up on me then later called back that she gathered few pennies she had to get the ticket, I was now like why didn't u just say this instead of putting me on pressure over how to get money to convey u all the way from london to Luton, over an hour journey at night.
Secondly, on her next school day, she had previously told me prior to her closing hours that her data has finished and she's using schools wifi, that the moment she steps out from school to head home, she won't be having access to internet, etc WhatsApp and all of that, but importantly was to make use of GPS google map, that's what people over there use to navigate their way in order not to get lost, I was like without internet how do u intend to get to ur destination when u know how stressful it was for u getting lost the other day, now the same statement she made was, I will sort myself. I was raged and said woman I will ask my friend to buy u data so u can get home easy and safe, she said no proble, that she's leaving now, I said well since i wont be able to reach you on whats app, I will definitely call you on normal call shortly to give you the data pin to load. She said no P and hung up.
Moments later, my friend had sent me the data pin, na so I begin dey call wifey oo, over 15 missed calls she nor pick. Later she called back and said her phone was in her laptop bag and her hands were frozen so she couldnt put hands in the bag to pick the call and that she didn't even hear it ring.
The issue I posted up there are issues of not being accountable, and attitude of not showing that you don't need me when its not just about that but for security and your well being knowing fully well you are new in the country and proper guidelines needs to be taken.
Another incident happened 3rd week after her arrival, we were video chatting while she was on a train station waiting for train, next thing I noticed was a guy sitting BEHIND her, the guy boldly took a peep into her phone directly, seemingly trying to see who she was on video call with, immediately i called her attention to it, she just smiled and looked back and said silently, nawa some people for this London nor go mind their business. This very day developed a story that transitioned towards few things I will be stating.
The next sunday, I called her in the morin to say hi and all that, next thing I know she dun dey go church, she nor even discuss am with me and na wetin we dn agree on sey we fo jointly choose church wey we go dey go. After church service, she call me sey that guy wey i talk sey dey peep into her phone, sey the guy that very day asked her how long shes been there for, she said, just 3 weeks, sey how come she come take know road when him don dey 3months he nver know road, sey that same guy him coincidentally meet am for the new church wey she come so, sey the guy dey look am, she comot eye, but later the guy come meet am sey are u not the one that showed me way to where I was going. Sey as him meet the guy coincidentally for church, he fit be sey he get why, maybe for job connection or what not. I nor say anything, cos coincidences arent something new in this world. Then the next day, she call me sey that same guy needs an apartment, sey na married guy with 4 kids, but him wife and 1kid dey here, 3 dey nija them nor fit come yet until house is ready, sey him dey ask her if she can help him get someone that can reference for him to get a house, ha him my wife come dey ginger me sey make i help am talk to my friend wey help us reference if him go fit help the guy too. I come sey no problem, she sey she go call the guy now and put us on 3 way call, i sey no p, i come dey wait for call, no call come and madam nor talk again, i come ring her sey hafa u nor do the three way call again? She sey the guy dey work, him nor fit talk,sey she don give the guy my number to call me later, me come sey no p, send him number I go save am down so if he calls i go know sey na him, madam nor gree send number, I come dey wonder sey wetin dey sup sef, normally I nor spose reason ahead, but me my instict dey very strong, i come begin dey put two and two together sey maybe the guy intention was never to get help but to use style dey hit on my madam maybe na why him nor wan talk to me but wan use my madam dey take communicate.
I come ask madam some some questions on previous ish, I come find out sey small lie dey, so I tackler her sey the way she take explain to me about how him meet the guy for train station nor join, she come vex sey me i come am liar, omo as we dey talk for whatsapp, i nor blv sey my madam added this guy to the call without my consent or my knowledge, so as I dey talk, the guy dey the background, i nor even know anything and the dude himself kept quiet, na after the call finish, I see am for call details sey the guy was added to the call, infact the dude even called me directky i nor pick. Now i got very angry, come call madam sey wetin dey sup, u added this dude wey talk sey him dey work him nor fit talk to the call wey me and u dey on and u didnt even notify me, ok lets agree sey if to sey u wan tell me sey u wan add the guy for call sey i nor go gree sey maybe na why u add am without my consent, at least after u add am secretly, u are suppose to talk and sey bae, since u are accusing me wrongly.
I have added the guy to this call so he can clear me out, but she didnt, she just added the guy and the dude himself kept quiet and didnt say a word until I hung up. I got very furious and told her this is the highest level of see finish and dragging in the mud, wetin u want that guy to dey feel like now? She said shes sorry that she only wanted to clear herself, I was now like even if u wanted to clear urself, if that the best way to go about it, the person who is the subject matter is the best person u need to introduce to clear u out? Later on i just bone the matter come apologise sey make we move on, na so she come begin dey yarn plenty, sey she call the guy that my hubby said that the way we met is unreal, sey the guy sef come talk sey wow, so your husband already thinks am sleeping with you, but i cant blame u though, u know u have a big back side, so thoughts like that from him is likely not a surprise, i was hmmmm to hear that, i come tell madam sey if na true this guy talk this thing, shouldnt u already know he has corny itentions, she said well she too dey wonder cos the two times wey them meet she nor wear wetin fit show her bkside so how d guy come take know. The matter end there, next day madam still dey worry me sey shey I go still help d guy, I was like I cant even talk to him, u dun useless me already for him presence, she dey claim sey she nor do anything wrong by adding him to the call, sey the guy know of agency wey fit help me get better job if i arrive, and sey the guy talk sey if me fit connect am to my friend to reference am for house, him go link me up fr the agency. I talk sey i nor dey interested. Omo I weak. Guys I need advise on how to handle issues over there, cos me nor dey take nonsense for nija here, but for there, one needs to chill, but then should it now be sey because we dey live for country wey give woman power, make woman come use that opportunity come dey fumble? |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Amotolongbo(f): 6:03pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
blacksam01:
na so so insecure laadis sabi talk...imseciy insecure..next thing sh is pregnant... nonsense! i’m sorry, I’m allergic to stupidity |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Cutehector(m): 6:04pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
matters arising. Someone should move for the adjournment of the meeting |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by amliftedhigher: 6:06pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Badb0y4lyf: Just follow the objective first get your family your kids out of this hell hole.
IF this kids become gays remember that they are more or less useless to the parents |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by BigBizzy(m): 6:07pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
na who you want make e read this long espistle? |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by BRATISLAVA: 6:10pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
98% of the men on this forum are rabble/sick/jobless/paid fiction writers.
Every single day, this?
Truly, misogyny is stupidity. 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by AlphaTaikun: 6:10pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
kbower: Hi Nlanders
We all know no marriage is all that smooth and rosey, we all that are in it have challenges here and there, and for almost 11 years now, out of tolerance, ruggedity, minding my business in terms of taking care of the family have always been something that has held my marriage down, because the majority of the issue I have with my wife have always been issues of trust, transparency, accountability, respect and loyalty.
Some people will say with these things I have listed, that I may be asking for too much, but I can tell whoever would reason that way that it's not too much because am a responsible father/husband that have never for once strayed the family in anyway that will make me lack any of the above stated qualities a man can enjoy from a wife.
Why am I here? Ok.. After enduring so much for 11 years, we are relocating to the UK, she is the main applicant, myself and the 3 children are dependants, she traveled first, leaving myself and the 3 kids behind until she can secure accommodation b4 we leave.
I have heard about countless incidences of how SOME women treat their husbands and the POWER zoned to women in that country which makes it almost impossible for a man with a wife that gives him constant problem to be able to thrive in that country.
I just want to state three peculiar incidences that occured during her 1month stay over there that is already making me feel I have alot to face over there, though I know my God is bigger than anything, I just want people that are over there, or people that are experienced here and all over who are capable of handing a good advise for me on getting there to know how I can fare and withstand what is to come.
Based on the above from the major incidences I have experienced with her, first two weeks of being there, she had gone to check a house b4 heading to school, on her way back to school, she claimed she didn't take enough money and going back home might not be possible, I asked how she would wanna go about it and she replied saying I will borrow money from Mr Mike, a man she just met at school on her first day of registration. I was like that's wrong, you don't form familiarity with someone you just met in another man's country, I said I will call a friend in liverpool to send you money and you could get your train ticket. She fumed, but I stood my ground and said that's how its going to be. I have asked her to collect a friends account details, since she has not opened an account yet, she said when her class finishes by 8.30pm she'll request details from her friend so the money can be sent. Fast forward to closing period, I messaged her to send me details, she ignored, I called ad she said nobody has an account that I should not worry she will sort herself, I was now like you just got to that country, u have no friends that u know too well to rely on, I am ur hubby and I opened a way for u to get money easily, yet u didn't make any effort to redeem the opportunity, omo she hung up on me then later called back that she gathered few pennies she had to get the ticket, I was now like why didn't u just say this instead of putting me on pressure over how to get money to convey u all the way from london to Luton, over an hour journey at night.
Secondly, on her next school day, she had previously told me prior to her closing hours that her data has finished and she's using schools wifi, that the moment she steps out from school to head home, she won't be having access to internet, etc WhatsApp and all of that, but importantly was to make use of GPS google map, that's what people over there use to navigate their way in order not to get lost, I was like without internet how do u intend to get to ur destination when u know how stressful it was for u getting lost the other day, now the same statement she made was, I will sort myself. I was raged and said woman I will ask my friend to buy u data so u can get home easy and safe, she said no proble, that she's leaving now, I said well since i wont be able to reach you on whats app, I will definitely call you on normal call shortly to give you the data pin to load. She said no P and hung up.
Moments later, my friend had sent me the data pin, na so I begin dey call wifey oo, over 15 missed calls she nor pick. Later she called back and said her phone was in her laptop bag and her hands were frozen so she couldnt put hands in the bag to pick the call and that she didn't even hear it ring.
The issue I posted up there are issues of not being accountable, and attitude of not showing that you don't need me when its not just about that but for security and your well being knowing fully well you are new in the country and proper guidelines needs to be taken.
Another incident happened 3rd week after her arrival, we were video chatting while she was on a train station waiting for train, next thing I noticed was a guy sitting BEHIND her, the guy boldly took a peep into her phone directly, seemingly trying to see who she was on video call with, immediately i called her attention to it, she just smiled and looked back and said silently, nawa some people for this London nor go mind their business. This very day developed a story that transitioned towards few things I will be stating.
The next sunday, I called her in the morin to say hi and all that, next thing I know she dun dey go church, she nor even discuss am with me and na wetin we dn agree on sey we fo jointly choose church wey we go dey go. After church service, she call me sey that guy wey i talk sey dey peep into her phone, sey the guy that very day asked her how long shes been there for, she said, just 3 weeks, sey how come she come take know road when him don dey 3months he nver know road, sey that same guy him coincidentally meet am for the new church wey she come so, sey the guy dey look am, she comot eye, but later the guy come meet am sey are u not the one that showed me way to where I was going. Sey as him meet the guy coincidentally for church, he fit be sey he get why, maybe for job connection or what not. I nor say anything, cos coincidences arent something new in this world. Then the next day, she call me sey that same guy needs an apartment, sey na married guy with 4 kids, but him wife and 1kid dey here, 3 dey nija them nor fit come yet until house is ready, sey him dey ask her if she can help him get someone that can reference for him to get a house, ha him my wife come dey ginger me sey make i help am talk to my friend wey help us reference if him go fit help the guy too. I come sey no problem, she sey she go call the guy now and put us on 3 way call, i sey no p, i come dey wait for call, no call come and madam nor talk again, i come ring her sey hafa u nor do the three way call again? She sey the guy dey work, him nor fit talk,sey she don give the guy my number to call me later, me come sey no p, send him number I go save am down so if he calls i go know sey na him, madam nor gree send number, I come dey wonder sey wetin dey sup sef, normally I nor spose reason ahead, but me my instict dey very strong, i come begin dey put two and two together sey maybe the guy intention was never to get help but to use style dey hit on my madam maybe na why him nor wan talk to me but wan use my madam dey take communicate.
I come ask madam some some questions on previous ish, I come find out sey small lie dey, so I tackler her sey the way she take explain to me about how him meet the guy for train station nor join, she come vex sey me i come am liar, omo as we dey talk for whatsapp, i nor blv sey my madam added this guy to the call without my consent or my knowledge, so as I dey talk, the guy dey the background, i nor even know anything and the dude himself kept quiet, na after the call finish, I see am for call details sey the guy was added to the call, infact the dude even called me directky i nor pick. Now i got very angry, come call madam sey wetin dey sup, u added this dude wey talk sey him dey work him nor fit talk to the call wey me and u dey on and u didnt even notify me, ok lets agree sey if to sey u wan tell me sey u wan add the guy for call sey i nor go gree sey maybe na why u add am without my consent, at least after u add am secretly, u are suppose to talk and sey bae, since u are accusing me wrongly.
I have added the guy to this call so he can clear me out, but she didnt, she just added the guy and the dude himself kept quiet and didnt say a word until I hung up. I got very furious and told her this is the highest level of see finish and dragging in the mud, wetin u want that guy to dey feel like now? She said shes sorry that she only wanted to clear herself, I was now like even if u wanted to clear urself, if that the best way to go about it, the person who is the subject matter is the best person u need to introduce to clear u out?
Later on i just bone the matter come apologise sey make we move on, na so she come begin dey yarn plenty, sey she call the guy that my hubby said that the way we met is unreal, sey the guy sef come talk sey wow, so your husband already thinks am sleeping with you, but i cant blame u though, u know u have a big back side, so thoughts like that from him is likely not a surprise, i was hmmmm to hear that, i come tell madam sey if na true this guy talk this thing, shouldnt u already know he has corny intentions, she said well she too dey wonder cos the two times wey them meet she nor wear wetin fit show her bkside so how d guy come take know.
The matter end there, next day madam still dey worry me sey shey I go still help d guy, I was like I cant even talk to him, u dun useless me already for him presence, she dey claim sey she nor do anything wrong by adding him to the call, sey the guy know of agency wey fit help me get better job if i arrive, and sey the guy talk sey if me fit connect am to my friend to reference am for house, him go link me up fr the agency. I talk sey i nor dey interested. Omo I weak. Guys I need advise on how to handle issues over there, cos me nor dey take nonsense for nija here, but for there, one needs to chill, but then should it now be sey because we dey live for country wey give woman power, make woman come use that opportunity come dey fumble? The cold winter is almost here! Keep your eyes and instincts sharp or at alert for any emotional weaknesses from your wife who has put up some naive behaviors here. That her church guy, if given the space will woo your bae, and "shift" her underwear. This is the reason why her conscience made her to open up to you on some of the dude's comments. She should focus on her studies and not be distracted by any man's insidious advances till you go over to the UK to finally meet her. Cheers. |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by sunnymighty(m): 6:11pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
PStacks:
Omo, you never see anything..
Na so one rubbish girl wey I been wan marry oo. She been done leave America come stay my house for Abuja for 3 weeks, only for the girl to go Back Yankee come dey yarn rubbish say she dey do me "Favour" by marrying me unto say she be American Citizen, if she marry me I go get paper.
Naso I swear for her and her papa and her American Citizenship, if no be naija wey be as e dey, wetin person de find go abroad sotey woman go dey harrass man put join..
Me no get that kind patience oo. I remind myself say Lion in Jungle is better than Dog in City ooo
Cow wey rush go abroad fit come back as corned beef oo.
This Japa na miscalculation for some people but everybody just dey follow the Japa herd mentality.
I can't shout ooo, make woman no swnd u go jail for oyinbo man country oo I can relate bro! I helped a Lady recently, even used my official email address at work to refer her, the lady got to America and was telling me nonsense that I needed to make up my mind if I wan marry her or not that shebi she don dey tell me before she comot, na so I provoke block her entire generation from my WhatsApp, never hear say Dem dey catch late comer there, you wan hold me for job because you enter America 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by minasu190: 6:12pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
In a nutshell shell, you are SIMP! |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by sgtponzihater1(m): 6:12pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
No kill yourself on top woman my guy. Women are trouble. It's best to stay in Nigeria and leave her to do whatever she like abroad, or stay abroad and live her in Nigeria.
My wife got to UK and can boldly call me "useless man", "good for nothing". Indians and other tribes follow their culture,but Nigerian women get abroad and become oppressors.
All will be well with you, but your woman do go.
PonziHater 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by 1Sharon(f): 6:13pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
How can a student have dependents? Such a stupid UK policy. 3 Likes |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by apparentlylaw(m): 6:13pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Na just Bleep no reason am
Just make sure you join her so you can service her well Women can sleep with anyone as long as they satisfy their desire ...
No think am too much She is yours...she is yours You marry her with your money She get pikin for you ...so what else
Just prepare to fire her well so she won't have any reason to compare and trust me na she go block the guy gan ...
I don't really take relationships or romance stuff to heart because we are humans and we were built to err and fall into temptation....
My babe relocated to France and it's almost 5 years now ...wetin concern me I no even send am She still calls like mad and sometimes i do shakara sef ...She knows what she left and what she is missing
As long as she still dey wire my btc for me nothing concern me ....
I used to be a good man gan and I always complain but I noticed the moment you start complaining, it feel s like you are nagging and you go loose your rep gan ...
Working on my plans to go Canada by next year ...she must turn up for there ...na boss move .. 14 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by amliftedhigher: 6:14pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Mummyimbecile: Truth be told, you can't treat your wife anyhow you feel in a western country. They give women so much power.
I plan to marry my girlfriend of over 5 years by March next year and file for her to migrate to the US. When she comes, I plan to sponsor her to become a Registered Nurse...I have begged her to behave herself once she enters the United States, and above all stay away from all these white women. Most of them are the ones spoiling our wives who migrate over here. Hope you are OK 2 Likes |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by meobizy(f): 6:14pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
See the many eyes viewing this thread. Jobless children full Nairaland. |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Berankis: 6:16pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Well, guy you try cos women can be a handfull most times. I dont think any man can claim to have 100percent control over his wife. However, I feel you married a "slay queen", I believe we all know what it means. You will need a lot of patience and tolerate a lot of shit just like you have been doing in the last 11years. God help you. 1 Like |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by passcrypto: 6:16pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
It is a pity that you have sold almost all things. You made mistake by making her your primary applicant. I do not know who advised you. You can still be the primary person despite your age. Was not study route she used? I feel you as a man. I know how it feels. Despite how we advise you where, a cultured man that mean well for his home is alway one. Your thought is about the welfare of your family. Your heart will be very better now. But it is inevitable now. I bet you she will do any thing in her power not to return to nigeria. What she thinks that can help her succeed, na those friend close she will confiding on. So do not attack her with words again, also do not sound Nice either. If she call you and ask for things you can do, do it. The ones you can't, tell her you cannot do. So if you eventually get there, keep your calm.... Cook as often as you have time. Secretly plant spy cameras in the house without her Knowledge. Because she will want to mess you up when you come over any little issue. As much as possible, start ur hustle once you are there and start making ur money and make plans ahead incase of eventuality. Do not reply her snubing and bad characters.use Camare to get ur facts. try and keep ur calm and pray for her.sleeping around there is so common that it is termed Just catching Fun. As a woman, they are carried away by what they hear and emotions. If you have not sold ur property, it would have been better for you to either go ur self on a separate deal or make your money in Nigeria but what happen has happened.. Brace your Heart for the worst ... Pray to your God. Work for your self... Break Fast is Real..... Woto woto is also real. 5 Likes 2 Shares |
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Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by OLRAYS(m): 6:19pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
You ll complicate issues by monitoring your wife here and there, it's not easy living in a new environment. Don't let her have any cause to do what is wrong. Give her the freedom to explore and settle down......please |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by StUriah(m): 6:21pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
You mean if your wife is offered to be fvcked to get a reference, you will gladly approve it? hustla:
You are a control freak and you will surely have issues when you get here
All her points are valid, you need people for a lot of things like reference for house, jobs etc or you will suffer wey be pro max type of suffer
With 3 kids, you think it will be a joy ride like Nigeria, i pity you
Childcare costs, feeding , school etc, e go shock you pass electricity.
Again, YOU NEED PEOPLE and your wife understand that but jealousy no make you see road
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Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Allisgud: 6:21pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
How many days u take type this article nawa,she knows the rule over there,one of the reason I can't have a woman over there,if I marry u as a Nigeria we only go there for vacation |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Kobicove(m): 6:22pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Guy so you knew you had insecurities and you still let your wife relocate alone?! 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by lolaluv1(f): 6:22pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
kbower: Hi Nlanders
We all know no marriage is all that smooth and rosey, we all that are in it have challenges here and there, and for almost 11 years now, out of tolerance, ruggedity, minding my business in terms of taking care of the family have always been something that has held my marriage down, because the majority of the issue I have with my wife have always been issues of trust, transparency, accountability, respect and loyalty.
Some people will say with these things I have listed, that I may be asking for too much, but I can tell whoever would reason that way that it's not too much because am a responsible father/husband that have never for once strayed the family in anyway that will make me lack any of the above stated qualities a man can enjoy from a wife.
Why am I here? Ok.. After enduring so much for 11 years, we are relocating to the UK, she is the main applicant, myself and the 3 children are dependants, she traveled first, leaving myself and the 3 kids behind until she can secure accommodation b4 we leave.
I have heard about countless incidences of how SOME women treat their husbands and the POWER zoned to women in that country which makes it almost impossible for a man with a wife that gives him constant problem to be able to thrive in that country.
I just want to state three peculiar incidences that occured during her 1month stay over there that is already making me feel I have alot to face over there, though I know my God is bigger than anything, I just want people that are over there, or people that are experienced here and all over who are capable of handing a good advise for me on getting there to know how I can fare and withstand what is to come.
Based on the above from the major incidences I have experienced with her, first two weeks of being there, she had gone to check a house b4 heading to school, on her way back to school, she claimed she didn't take enough money and going back home might not be possible, I asked how she would wanna go about it and she replied saying I will borrow money from Mr Mike, a man she just met at school on her first day of registration. I was like that's wrong, you don't form familiarity with someone you just met in another man's country, I said I will call a friend in liverpool to send you money and you could get your train ticket. She fumed, but I stood my ground and said that's how its going to be. I have asked her to collect a friends account details, since she has not opened an account yet, she said when her class finishes by 8.30pm she'll request details from her friend so the money can be sent. Fast forward to closing period, I messaged her to send me details, she ignored, I called ad she said nobody has an account that I should not worry she will sort herself, I was now like you just got to that country, u have no friends that u know too well to rely on, I am ur hubby and I opened a way for u to get money easily, yet u didn't make any effort to redeem the opportunity, omo she hung up on me then later called back that she gathered few pennies she had to get the ticket, I was now like why didn't u just say this instead of putting me on pressure over how to get money to convey u all the way from london to Luton, over an hour journey at night.
Secondly, on her next school day, she had previously told me prior to her closing hours that her data has finished and she's using schools wifi, that the moment she steps out from school to head home, she won't be having access to internet, etc WhatsApp and all of that, but importantly was to make use of GPS google map, that's what people over there use to navigate their way in order not to get lost, I was like without internet how do u intend to get to ur destination when u know how stressful it was for u getting lost the other day, now the same statement she made was, I will sort myself. I was raged and said woman I will ask my friend to buy u data so u can get home easy and safe, she said no proble, that she's leaving now, I said well since i wont be able to reach you on whats app, I will definitely call you on normal call shortly to give you the data pin to load. She said no P and hung up.
Moments later, my friend had sent me the data pin, na so I begin dey call wifey oo, over 15 missed calls she nor pick. Later she called back and said her phone was in her laptop bag and her hands were frozen so she couldnt put hands in the bag to pick the call and that she didn't even hear it ring.
The issue I posted up there are issues of not being accountable, and attitude of not showing that you don't need me when its not just about that but for security and your well being knowing fully well you are new in the country and proper guidelines needs to be taken.
Another incident happened 3rd week after her arrival, we were video chatting while she was on a train station waiting for train, next thing I noticed was a guy sitting BEHIND her, the guy boldly took a peep into her phone directly, seemingly trying to see who she was on video call with, immediately i called her attention to it, she just smiled and looked back and said silently, nawa some people for this London nor go mind their business. This very day developed a story that transitioned towards few things I will be stating.
The next sunday, I called her in the morin to say hi and all that, next thing I know she dun dey go church, she nor even discuss am with me and na wetin we dn agree on sey we fo jointly choose church wey we go dey go. After church service, she call me sey that guy wey i talk sey dey peep into her phone, sey the guy that very day asked her how long shes been there for, she said, just 3 weeks, sey how come she come take know road when him don dey 3months he nver know road, sey that same guy him coincidentally meet am for the new church wey she come so, sey the guy dey look am, she comot eye, but later the guy come meet am sey are u not the one that showed me way to where I was going. Sey as him meet the guy coincidentally for church, he fit be sey he get why, maybe for job connection or what not. I nor say anything, cos coincidences arent something new in this world. Then the next day, she call me sey that same guy needs an apartment, sey na married guy with 4 kids, but him wife and 1kid dey here, 3 dey nija them nor fit come yet until house is ready, sey him dey ask her if she can help him get someone that can reference for him to get a house, ha him my wife come dey ginger me sey make i help am talk to my friend wey help us reference if him go fit help the guy too. I come sey no problem, she sey she go call the guy now and put us on 3 way call, i sey no p, i come dey wait for call, no call come and madam nor talk again, i come ring her sey hafa u nor do the three way call again? She sey the guy dey work, him nor fit talk,sey she don give the guy my number to call me later, me come sey no p, send him number I go save am down so if he calls i go know sey na him, madam nor gree send number, I come dey wonder sey wetin dey sup sef, normally I nor spose reason ahead, but me my instict dey very strong, i come begin dey put two and two together sey maybe the guy intention was never to get help but to use style dey hit on my madam maybe na why him nor wan talk to me but wan use my madam dey take communicate.
I come ask madam some some questions on previous ish, I come find out sey small lie dey, so I tackler her sey the way she take explain to me about how him meet the guy for train station nor join, she come vex sey me i come am liar, omo as we dey talk for whatsapp, i nor blv sey my madam added this guy to the call without my consent or my knowledge, so as I dey talk, the guy dey the background, i nor even know anything and the dude himself kept quiet, na after the call finish, I see am for call details sey the guy was added to the call, infact the dude even called me directky i nor pick. Now i got very angry, come call madam sey wetin dey sup, u added this dude wey talk sey him dey work him nor fit talk to the call wey me and u dey on and u didnt even notify me, ok lets agree sey if to sey u wan tell me sey u wan add the guy for call sey i nor go gree sey maybe na why u add am without my consent, at least after u add am secretly, u are suppose to talk and sey bae, since u are accusing me wrongly.
I have added the guy to this call so he can clear me out, but she didnt, she just added the guy and the dude himself kept quiet and didnt say a word until I hung up. I got very furious and told her this is the highest level of see finish and dragging in the mud, wetin u want that guy to dey feel like now? She said shes sorry that she only wanted to clear herself, I was now like even if u wanted to clear urself, if that the best way to go about it, the person who is the subject matter is the best person u need to introduce to clear u out? Later on i just bone the matter come apologise sey make we move on, na so she come begin dey yarn plenty, sey she call the guy that my hubby said that the way we met is unreal, sey the guy sef come talk sey wow, so your husband already thinks am sleeping with you, but i cant blame u though, u know u have a big back side, so thoughts like that from him is likely not a surprise, i was hmmmm to hear that, i come tell madam sey if na true this guy talk this thing, shouldnt u already know he has corny itentions, she said well she too dey wonder cos the two times wey them meet she nor wear wetin fit show her bkside so how d guy come take know. The matter end there, next day madam still dey worry me sey shey I go still help d guy, I was like I cant even talk to him, u dun useless me already for him presence, she dey claim sey she nor do anything wrong by adding him to the call, sey the guy know of agency wey fit help me get better job if i arrive, and sey the guy talk sey if me fit connect am to my friend to reference am for house, him go link me up fr the agency. I talk sey i nor dey interested. Omo I weak. Guys I need advise on how to handle issues over there, cos me nor dey take nonsense for nija here, but for there, one needs to chill, but then should it now be sey because we dey live for country wey give woman power, make woman come use that opportunity come dey fumble? You are very insecure. She is an adult, when you get to the UK you will find out that everyone has to find their feet. One cannot afford to sit down, waiting for someone to make decisions for you when you have your own working brain. Better change your mindset, because you will definitely have problems as it is termed abuse for an adult not to be allowed to make their own decisions. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Married Guys That Relocated To The UK, Whats Your Experience by Nawttiboi007(m): 6:25pm On Oct 29, 2022 |
Bros this woman truly loves you, don’t spoil your marriage over insecurity issues.. you should respect n trust the mother of your 3 children. I strongly believe you’re not faithful and you’re judging her with that effect kbower:
This is exactly what I did over the last 2 days now, and guess what, she has been stalking me with calls. I only call her when there is something important to discuss, but calls based on, i miss u and all of that nor even dey again, the moment she noticed I have drifted from showing affection over calls, she started bombarding me with calls complaining that I dont call her. 6 Likes |