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My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms - Family (6) - Nairaland

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Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by balarabe01(m): 4:28pm On Nov 10, 2022
Apologise to your father and make peace, hussle and fend for yourself in addition to any support home gives,so that you can help yourself and support home your mother and father later, Your mother is the cause of your woes and your father could not forgive her.ask your mother.
Karma is real.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Romanoff(f): 4:37pm On Nov 10, 2022
AfonjaConehead:

Yes nah,I do it at times when I wanna get naughty hehe grin
I stopped when one bronco was trying to get drunk...

Lol. You see. So I wasn't wrong to assume it was a guy.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by b1olat: 5:09pm On Nov 10, 2022
I hope the distate you have for your father was not as a result of evil manipulations/machinations from your mother. Most wives will paint their husbands black before their children so as to gain some undue sympathy/affections Moreso if the man is polygamous or tilting towards it. Mothers do have a great deal of influence on their siblings such that they take everything from them hook, line and sinker whether true or false. Do you know the financial situation of your Dad? You shouldn't have rejected the 50k. A child can't bring forth his father's misdemeanor to bare to the extent that you will hate or despise him. Remember you can't have another father and it wasn't your making that you came through him. Settle whatever differences with him so that you can have a rewarding and fulfilling Life.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Psoul(m): 5:10pm On Nov 10, 2022
Enacto:
Good evening, this is my first time posting here and it because I'm kinda troubled pls I will need you guys to help me on this issue.

Since 2020 I have not been in good terms with my dad, and it all started with a little fight about drinking of the water in the fridge and my dad decided to lock the sitting room where the fridge was kept restricting my mom and myself to the room alone as at this time I was in 400lvl and 24years.

My dad doesn't drop money and home so I had to look for means to feed myself which was really new to me cos he has been the one sending money to me in school even thou he doesn't drop at home.

After then we kept having issues about him not giving me a private room in the house even up till now, then on a day like that an issue happened after I beating my 3years old niece he was so angry that he hits me severally at a conered spot that he almost hit my eyes I had to push him on the bed and ran out of the house, then the second day I packed my stuff's and left for school throughout 2021 I didn't come home till December and he didn't bother calling or sent me money not my school fee and project fee I did everything on my own.

I came home late last year and apologized and later I asked him for my school fee which I had not paid as at that time, he kept giving me excuses which I Know he has and left after much talk he gave me #50,000 out of like #150,000 but sincerely I didn't collect it cos I don't know where to get the remains then I got a job and saved up and paid.

Presently I'm very mad at him because he never cared about me or my mum, all he does with his money is to give it to his concubines. It really painful that I had to work for 7-9hours everyday while standing for 1k per day and my dad is out there spending his money for one LovePeddler.

Do u think he deserves my forgiveness??


My dear, I don't want to go deep into this your story.
I will give you one advise. Take it for your good or leave it to ur detriment.
You will see many pieces of advice that will run contrary to mine, but I will advise you to be wise.

Dear, go back to your father and sincerely apologize to him. Don't make any excuse for yourself.
Sincerely and wholeheartedly ask for his forgiveness and ask him to bless you.
I am telling you this out of experience.
What narrated may be somehow painful to you, but it's not enough to become enemy to ur father.
If u continue like this, you may regret it in future and may be by then, your father may not be there.
Go make peace with him, it is not that difficult.

You said that he is spending his money on other women. This may be the story you mom mad u to believe.
You dad loves you and has been training you in school.
He gave you part of your school fees and u rejected it cos you believe he has the money.
Just wait till you start getting your own children and you will understand why your father couldn't give you all the money you requested for.

Do you know that most parents borrow money to give to their children and the child will still be frowning face instead of thanking the parents and encourage them in their efforts.
Wait till that responsibility falls on your shoulder. Then your eyes go clear.

1 Like

Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Helpout12345: 5:39pm On Nov 10, 2022
salem1996:


I laught at some of your comments, saying things you can't even do yourselves.

So we should encourage people to be disrespecting their parents?

If disrespecting of parents by their children is accepted then everyone will be disrespecting everyone in the society.

This same man must have raised her till now, done so many good things in her life and will still do more in future in her life.

But because he scolded her because she beat a 3year child, now he is a demon that must be disrespected.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Doyou2019: 5:59pm On Nov 10, 2022
faoogoke:


Bro honour your father that your days may be long.
Honoring your father means you take whatever he throws at you no matter what. He should continue to earn your respect notwithstanding what he did or didn't do. Remember you are going to be a father too. If you cannot endure please leave the house for him.
You can never be justified before God for whatever action you take against your father. Let God be the judge.
His actions against you will prepare you to be a responsible father and push you to the place of glory God has for you.
He brought you to this world. You have nothing to forgive him for. Move ahead with your life and trust Almighty father to help you. God bless you

yen yen yen

The little baby who got amputated by his own dad weeks ago too is not justified before God abi.
Hogwash !
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by kunle75(m): 6:08pm On Nov 10, 2022
Enacto:
Good evening, this is my first time posting here and it because I'm kinda troubled pls I will need you guys to help me on this issue.

Since 2020 I have not been in good terms with my dad, and it all started with a little fight about drinking of the water in the fridge and my dad decided to lock the sitting room where the fridge was kept restricting my mom and myself to the room alone as at this time I was in 400lvl and 24years.

My dad doesn't drop money and home so I had to look for means to feed myself which was really new to me cos he has been the one sending money to me in school even thou he doesn't drop at home.

After then we kept having issues about him not giving me a private room in the house even up till now, then on a day like that an issue happened after I beating my 3years old niece he was so angry that he hits me severally at a conered spot that he almost hit my eyes I had to push him on the bed and ran out of the house, then the second day I packed my stuff's and left for school throughout 2021 I didn't come home till December and he didn't bother calling or sent me money not my school fee and project fee I did everything on my own.

I came home late last year and apologized and later I asked him for my school fee which I had not paid as at that time, he kept giving me excuses which I Know he has and left after much talk he gave me #50,000 out of like #150,000 but sincerely I didn't collect it cos I don't know where to get the remains then I got a job and saved up and paid.

Presently I'm very mad at him because he never cared about me or my mum, all he does with his money is to give it to his concubines. It really painful that I had to work for 7-9hours everyday while standing for 1k per day and my dad is out there spending his money for one LovePeddler.

Do u think he deserves my forgiveness??


Forgive him and move on with your life.

I salute your bravery too,some girls would have gone otherwise to get the same money but stay focused and see what God will do.

As for your tuition I do hope its sorted and if not you can dm me and let's see how that can be sorted.

Shalom
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:15pm On Nov 10, 2022
Yes I might have disrespected him by pushing him that night but i don't think I ever did or spoke back to my dad whenever he is talking most times I just remain silent .I'm not a baby why will I be fighting for my mom most times I fight for my dad whenever there is a disagreement or I don't even interfere at all. Most of the things my elder brother does to my dad and he will not talk, I dare not say 1% to him. I have changed churches at home all because he said if I don't follow him to every church he changes to he will disown me yet I always follow him to those churches but never made it mandatory for my elder brother
Helpout12345:
What is this world turning into?

So you disrespect your father and come online to come and ask us if you should forgive him?

Go and apologize to your father. Stop disrespecting him for whatever reason. And stop fighting your father because of your mother.

If you present yourself as a humble, respectful daughter to him, you can go close to him and table what you think he should do better about the family. But you are going about it the wrong way.

Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:18pm On Nov 10, 2022
Yes you are right there are lots of things I can't talk about here because the family issue no be today.
toobusy:
At 24,you should be thinking of how to become less of a burden to your Dad, meanwhile,I feel there are
some important details about your relationship and issues with your father that you didn't enlist in your write-up.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Clinghton: 8:24pm On Nov 10, 2022
If you have a legit means of being independent embrace it.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:26pm On Nov 10, 2022
I shouldn't be entitled to my dad's money even while still.in school! Presently I haven't even done my clearance and I'm beating my ass up everyday to get the money for the clearance, I earn less than 25k and I still drop money at home, give money for drugs to my sick mom and still try to save up for my school fee and clearance thou I have a little side hustle with I don't earn much from.
Richy4:

After trying to sympathize with you, you destroyed it at the end...
<< You are gainfully employed, u are earning an honest living yet the entitlement mentality still managed to find it's way in...

Parents are really damaging their Nigerian kids..
"It really painful that I had to work for 7-9hours everyday while standing for 1k per day.... shockedgrin cheesy
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Techm8: 8:27pm On Nov 10, 2022
You are lucky to still have a dad. Life is short. Time flies by fast and before you know it your dad will be no more. Go make amends. Home is where love is.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Nobody: 8:28pm On Nov 10, 2022
Enacto:
Good evening, this is my first time posting here and it because I'm kinda troubled pls I will need you guys to help me on this issue.

Since 2020 I have not been in good terms with my dad, and it all started with a little fight about drinking of the water in the fridge and my dad decided to lock the sitting room where the fridge was kept restricting my mom and myself to the room alone as at this time I was in 400lvl and 24years.

My dad doesn't drop money and home so I had to look for means to feed myself which was really new to me cos he has been the one sending money to me in school even thou he doesn't drop at home.

After then we kept having issues about him not giving me a private room in the house even up till now, then on a day like that an issue happened after I beating my 3years old niece he was so angry that he hits me severally at a conered spot that he almost hit my eyes I had to push him on the bed and ran out of the house, then the second day I packed my stuff's and left for school throughout 2021 I didn't come home till December and he didn't bother calling or sent me money not my school fee and project fee I did everything on my own.

I came home late last year and apologized and later I asked him for my school fee which I had not paid as at that time, he kept giving me excuses which I Know he has and left after much talk he gave me #50,000 out of like #150,000 but sincerely I didn't collect it cos I don't know where to get the remains then I got a job and saved up and paid.

Presently I'm very mad at him because he never cared about me or my mum, all he does with his money is to give it to his concubines. It really painful that I had to work for 7-9hours everyday while standing for 1k per day and my dad is out there spending his money for one LovePeddler.

Do u think he deserves my forgiveness??

What is painful in having to work 7-9 hours to pay for your school.
Its no big deal and life is not promised to be a bed of roses.

Stop complaining and man up.

1 Like

Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:28pm On Nov 10, 2022
It has always been the other way round
fineboynl:
Something must have cause all of that. You and you mother is disrespecting him. When this type of things keep happening he will find happiness else where.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:30pm On Nov 10, 2022
I'm a girl child it not really easy to leave home or mingle with friends here with the little freedom I have today was because I decided to leave home for a year thou it wasn't easy
JealousCobra:
:-
Op, @ 24 you are still at your parents house dictating for them, I left my parents when I was 14 yrs.... if I were your father na to disown you be the koko.

You are among the lazy youths buhari is taking about.

1 Like

Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:35pm On Nov 10, 2022
My mom is very sick , doesn't earn that much cos she is a trader and she never supported me for leaving home thou most times even when my dad and I are in good terms I don't like going home because it not a happy home.
oliverwrites:
If your dad is not paying your fee why is your mom not paying it?

Women are often quick to take accolades but many atimes the man does all the fending for the family. An example is here.

I do not support your dad, I hate dead beat fathers but marriage has thought me to balance everything.

Once again why is your mom not fending for you if your dad is not?
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:38pm On Nov 10, 2022
The kinda work I'm doing is extremely hectic and standing for 9hours is affecting my legs.Im a lady thou
Skyview01:


What is painful in having to work 7-9 hours to pay for your school.
Its no big deal and life is not promised to be a bed of roses.

Stop complaining and man up.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:41pm On Nov 10, 2022
I really do love my dad even than my mom but I'm just very angry at him.i don't wish him anything bad even while in this issue I still have him boxers and he collected because I sell boxers
Techm8:
You are lucky to still have a dad. Life is short. Time flies by fast and before you know it your dad will be no more. Go make amends. Home is where love is.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:44pm On Nov 10, 2022
Is there anything wrong in spanking my 3year old niece? That doesn't mean I hate her a child I cook for, bath her washes her clothes everyday ,take her to school and bring her back and she loves being around me and I love her alot than my life self
2Radii:
Hmmm

That is Ur side of the story tho,

If only we can hear his side of the story.



U that can beat Ur 3yr old niece abi na sibling, hmmmm
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by BTCog: 8:46pm On Nov 10, 2022
Enacto:
Yes I do,my parents first born is an introvert doesn't even talk much, he just accept anything,then my immediate brother is kinda very okay on his own I can't dare say 1% of those insultive words he says to my dad and he embarrasses him anywhere yet he accepts all this things and even calls him from time to time cos he gives him money. My dad accept anything from him, sometimes my brother shouts at him yet he won't get mad cos my brother is a no nonsense person. I think it because I don't have money thou� embarassed
You and your siblings want to kill the innocent man. He wanted to discipline you and you decided to show him that you could do worse than the boys. The man was so shocked that he left you on the assumption that you have eloped with a lover. He doesn't worry much about the boys because they will eventually see what he saw as a father. He thought he could bend you to make you better for a husband but you disappointed him
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:47pm On Nov 10, 2022
Brainwashed by my mum or thing I witnessed on my own! Moreso I have always wanted to stand on my own just that raising that amount of money for me was hard as at that time
Kazim88:
You are just placing curse on yourself by fighting your dad (or any of your parent).

It's not entirely your fault tho, You have been brainwashed by your mum to hate your dad.

Most women unintentionally poison their children mind against their dad or dad's relatives but at the end it is their children that still suffers it.

In summary, you already have so much biased against your dad, the only reason you want to stay connected to him is because you think he has money you are entitled to but soon you would realise the hard truth.... That you have a social disorder.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by JealousCobra(m): 8:48pm On Nov 10, 2022
Enacto:
I'm a girl child it not really easy to leave home or mingle with friends here with the little freedom I have today was because I decided to leave home for a year thou it wasn't easy



My little advise to you is to be obedient to your father, after God, he is next.. so that your days will be long and peaceful on earth.

Men have subtle hearts, talk to him politely you will see him changing his furious attitudes towards you.

Lay down your stubbornness and be more respectful, everything we begin to fall in place to you again.

Your choice, your life.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by JealousCobra(m): 8:50pm On Nov 10, 2022
Psoul:



My dear, I don't want to go deep into this your story.
I will give you one advise. Take it for your good or leave it to ur detriment.
You will see many pieces of advice that will run contrary to mine, but I will advise you to be wise.

Dear, go back to your father and sincerely apologize to him. Don't make any excuse for yourself.
Sincerely and wholeheartedly ask for his forgiveness and ask him to bless you.
I am telling you this out of experience.
What narrated may be somehow painful to you, but it's not enough to become enemy to ur father.
If u continue like this, you may regret it in future and may be by then, your father may not be there.
Go make peace with him, it is not that difficult.

You said that he is spending his money on other women. This may be the story you mom mad u to believe.
You dad loves you and has been training you in school.
He gave you part of your school fees and u rejected it cos you believe he has the money.
Just wait till you start getting your own children and you will understand why your father couldn't give you all the money you requested for.

Do you know that most parents borrow money to give to their children and the child will still be frowning face instead of thanking the parents and encourage them in their efforts.
Wait till that responsibility falls on your shoulder. Then your eyes go clear.

Good one here!!

1 Like

Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:54pm On Nov 10, 2022
I don't think there is anyone my dad respect cos my dad has actually fought with most of his families, friends and he is not in any way close to anybody in our environment. I accept I was overpampered probably that the reason I am feeling this way. I have always been myself and never questioned my dad to his face even the money I rejected I only said the money isn't enough to pay my school fee or clearance fee and he said ok I should go.
Tukor1759:
first,go and ask your dad for forgiveness, do it in a way of family meeting, invite a person that your dad so much respect if possible.secondly,stop doing what others does,be your self, cause am seeing that you are looking at what he your father is doing for your brother,be unique.third, you suppose to be your dad favorite,he loves you but you are seeing it the other way,any child that was over pampered 87% always goes astray,last last find a mentor, you own done too much
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 8:59pm On Nov 10, 2022
I did, knelt down and sob because I was sorry and in every way I have been obidient to him. My dad is a good person o but his short comings can make one not come home for years.Everyone who stays with us eventually left because he is someone who doesn't know how to overlook things
JealousCobra:




My little advise to you is to be obedient to your father, after God, he is next.. so that your days will be long and peaceful on earth.

Men have subtle hearts, talk to him politely you will see him changing his furious attitudes towards you.

Lay down your stubbornness and be more respectful, everything we begin to fall in place to you again.

Your choice, your life.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by tunize(m): 9:08pm On Nov 10, 2022
If only you knew what your father also passed through to feed, cloth, shelter and pay your from day one, then you will know that life is not easy at least he has tried at 24 you suppose don dey make ur own small small money and not having some entitlement mentality you are a grown up man or woman. Now you are getting paid 1000 box and you are feeling sad,with this you are suppose to applaud your father.

The issue of your mom is so simple nothing bad in you conducting a meeting between ur both parent you are already an adult. Talk to your father he might have this eagle believe me when he is alone, baba go think waitn you tell am but first go apologise
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 9:11pm On Nov 10, 2022
My mom didn't make up anything she doesn't even know I knew somethings, my dad that borrowed more than 200k for a woman and she eventually ran away when it was time to pay my dad was the one who paid the money or the one he rented an apartment for another woman yet he hasn't completed his own house. 2weeks ago he gave my neice his phone to see movies on it and went out but when I saw her with the porn she was seeing porn cos he has lots of it in it, I had to collect the phone and went through his pics and saw his pics with the woman he is with cooking for him
and you still want me to be happy?

I know I don't have any reason to justify my attitude towards him but I still greet him any time we are opportuned to meet inside the house cos my work has taken most of my time at home and still do all my necessary house chores at home but nothing has brought us together.
Psoul:



My dear, I don't want to go deep into this your story.
I will give you one advise. Take it for your good or leave it to ur detriment.
You will see many pieces of advice that will run contrary to mine, but I will advise you to be wise.

Dear, go back to your father and sincerely apologize to him. Don't make any excuse for yourself.
Sincerely and wholeheartedly ask for his forgiveness and ask him to bless you.
I am telling you this out of experience.
What narrated may be somehow painful to you, but it's not enough to become enemy to ur father.
If u continue like this, you may regret it in future and may be by then, your father may not be there.
Go make peace with him, it is not that difficult.

You said that he is spending his money on other women. This may be the story you mom mad u to believe.
You dad loves you and has been training you in school.
He gave you part of your school fees and u rejected it cos you believe he has the money.
Just wait till you start getting your own children and you will understand why your father couldn't give you all the money you requested for.

Do you know that most parents borrow money to give to their children and the child will still be frowning face instead of thanking the parents and encourage them in their efforts.
Wait till that responsibility falls on your shoulder. Then your eyes go clear.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by 2Radii: 9:12pm On Nov 10, 2022
Enacto:
Is there anything wrong in spanking my 3year old niece? That doesn't mean I hate her a child I cook for, bath her washes her clothes everyday ,take her to school and bring her back and she loves being around me and I love her alot than my life self
Oohh

Sorry

But u didn't say u spanked her, u said u beat her and the word "beat" is relative
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 9:15pm On Nov 10, 2022
Even b4 having issues with my dad you don't want to imagine how many times my brothers and I have tried settling things even both families the issue has gone beyond the way you see it that every person in this town knows everything about my family all because my dad never stopped talking.
tunize:
If only you knew what your father also passed through to feed, cloth, shelter and pay your from day one, then you will know that life is not easy at least he has tried at 24 you suppose don dey make ur own small small money and not having some entitlement mentality you are a grown up man or woman. Now you are getting paid 1000 box and you are feeling sad,with this you are suppose to applaud your father.

The issue of your mom is so simple nothing bad in you conducting a meeting between ur both parent you are already an adult. Talk to your father he might have this eagle believe me when he is alone, baba go think waitn you tell am but first go apologise
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by JealousCobra(m): 9:18pm On Nov 10, 2022
Enacto:
I did, knelt down and sob because I was sorry and in every way I have been obidient to him. My dad is a good person o but his short comings can make one not come home for years.Everyone who stays with us eventually left because he is someone who doesn't know how to overlook things

I love the bolded...I pray that your dad will have a change of heart towards you and the rest of the family.

Cheers dear.
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by Enacto(f): 9:18pm On Nov 10, 2022
Probably my use of English, it wasn't something outrageous even till today I still beat and correct her if she does something wrong.
2Radii:
Oohh

Sorry

But u didn't say u spanked her, u said u beat her and the word "beat" is relative
Re: My Dad And I Aren't In Good Terms by 2Radii: 9:20pm On Nov 10, 2022
Enacto:
Probably my use of English, it wasn't something outrageous even till today I still beat and correct her if she does something wrong.
I now understand....


But the bottom line is u have to resolve the issue between u and Ur father

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