l am the first child of my family ,due to some family issues, the age gap between me and my siblings is quiet far, l am 10 yrs older than my immediate brother, and 19 yrs older than our last born,
The major issue now is that since l was born,the major challenge in our family is finance, l have to battle my way through University, after my service in 2021 ,no job,l started a small business that is helping me with minor upkeep,,, now financial challenges keep creeping up here and there, l have to carter for my father mother and siblings, is like everyday the challenges for money keep spranging up,,
l have a wonderful girlfriend l intended getting married to, but with this family challenges l dont even know when l will settle down, seriously my head is full,, first born in this forum how do yo handle this challenges ?

Upon your situation you still dey reason marriage for mind.

Kalatium:
Upon your situation you still dey reason marriage for mind.

my brother even if l become a priest l wont finish this family issues,,,

victooman:
l am the first child of my family ,due to some family issues, the age gap between me and my siblings is quiet far, l am 10 yrs older than my immediate brother, and 19 yrs older than our last born,
The major issue now is that since l was born,the major challenge in our family is finance, l have to battle my way through University, after my service in 2021 ,no job,l started a small business that is helping me with minor upkeep,,, now financial challenges keep creeping up here and there, l have to carter for my father mother and siblings, is like everyday the challenges for money keep spranging up,,
l have a wonderful girlfriend l intended getting married to, but with this family challenges l dont even know when l will settle down, seriously my head is full,, first born in this forum how do yo handle this challenges ?

Stop complaining you voted for APC

ufotty2001:

Stop complaining you voted for APC

l didn't bro,

You can help your family but know that you come first, you can only do what you can but you have to look after yourself as well. Else it will take a huge toll on your mental health and well being.

you have to get your priorities in life...
FIRST take care of your own self at all times. make sure you prioritize your own life over anyone else.
SECOND when your own priorities are met and secured, you can possibly think of helping others.
THIRD if push come to shove, your own life priorities should always be the 1st thing to solve over anything/anyone else's issues.

You girl friend must be supportive and must be working if not please let her go o

Family sacrifice is a serious business and you cannot combine young growing family with it

You can give yours 6 years and plan to have aleast 2 of your siblings out of school before you start anything marriage.

I know someone who did that and now she's married - she didn't want to bring family issues to husbandus house and laboured to take care of all her siblings

Learn to balance the two. Your personal aspirations and your family issues.

DWJOBScom:
You girl friend must be supportive and must be working if not please let her go o

Family sacrifice is a serious business and you cannot combine young growing family with it

You can give yours 6 years and plan to have aleast 2 of your siblings out of school before you start anything marriage.

I know someone who did that and now she's married - she didn't want to bring family issues to husbandus house and laboured to take care of all her siblings

brother l am 30yrs old,my girlfriend is supportive hard working and intelligent,, good women are not that easy to find,, before 2 of my siblings finishes University l should be almost 40 and what assurance do l have money will be enough to carter for family needs,, l just want to get married and continue supporting in my own little way,l can't do it all honestly.

victooman:
l am the first child of my family ,due to some family issues, the age gap between me and my siblings is quiet far, l am 10 yrs older than my immediate brother, and 19 yrs older than our last born,
The major issue now is that since l was born,the major challenge in our family is finance, l have to battle my way through University, after my service in 2021 ,no job,l started a small business that is helping me with minor upkeep,,, now financial challenges keep creeping up here and there, l have to carter for my father mother and siblings, is like everyday the challenges for money keep spranging up,,
l have a wonderful girlfriend l intended getting married to, but with this family challenges l dont even know when l will settle down, seriously my head is full,, first born in this forum how do yo handle this challenges ?

You don't have a problem

My own be say nothing dey marriage oooo, other than stress and emotional challenge of having to tolerate and understand one mumu lady who is after financial opprtunity. We have been there

Rokiat:
You can help your family but know that you come first, you can only do what you can but you have to look after yourself as well. Else it will take a huge toll on your mental health and well being.

omo see yansh ooo

U gather no be lie

EmiDon11:
omo see yansh ooo

U gather no be lie

Are your siblings handicapped? Can't they work to support themselves?

Is not a must to help Siblings, helping siblings should be done once in a while not constantly. If they are more than 18 years old, they should look for a sales girl or Sales boy work to do to provide for some of their needs.

Sometimes we start what we can't finish

The advice I will give to you is to put yourself first in any decision you are making because if anything happens to you, your family will move on with their lives and dreams.

If you have to give your parents, give them and take care of them but you see all these siblings once you feel for them and start providing for their needs, they will think you have one place you are fetching money from and won't even pity for you with their demands.

And you know most of us have soft spot for our siblings and they usually take advantage of it.

My Siblings are 20 years and above and I always tell them to be productive to themselves and that when there is a need for me to help them, I will help them as for now I only provide the needs of my Mom and sometimes the last born of the house.

I told the rest to take care of themselves.

Rokiat:

i dey pray make i jam this type wey be my mate...
Aswear na marriage straight...
Ah no go ever cheat on her....
Nevaaaaaaa!!!
Bcuz;
She has all i want in a woman.
God really blessed u jare...
Golibe n' inwere ya
Golibe n' chukwu enyego gi yaa

victooman:
brother l am 30yrs old,my girlfriend is supportive hard working and intelligent,, good women are not that easy to find,, before 2 of my siblings finishes University l should be almost 40 and what assurance do l have money will be enough to carter for family needs,, l just want to get married and continue supporting in my own little way,l can't do it all honestly.

Is your girlfriend working or has a successful endeavour??
It's not easy o

On a normal note, first borns are naturally useless...
Them just be like defenders in a football pitch. Them no dey progress...
So op no go too reason am ooo. Na so una dey.

I am lastborn ooo make una no attack me IF NOT, I GO CRY

Evestar200:
Are your siblings handicap? Can't they work to support themselves?

Is not a must to help Siblings, helping siblings should be done once in a while not constantly. If they are more than 18 years old, they should look for a sales girl or Sales boy work to do to provide for some of their needs.

Sometimes we start what we can't finish

The advice I will give to you is to put yourself first in any decision you are making because if anything happens to you, your family will move on with their lives and dreams.

If you have to give your parents, give them and take care of them but you see all these siblings once you feel for them and start providing for their needs, they will think you have one place you are fetching money from and won't even pity for you with their demands.

And you know most of us have soft for our Siblings and they usually take advantage of it.

My Siblings are 20 years and above and I always tell them to be productive to themselves and that when there is a need for me to help them I will help them as for now I only provide the needs of my Mom and sometimes the last born of the house.

I told the rest to take care of themselves.

Thank you very much,my immediate younger brother is working as a sales boy already, 2 of my siblings are are far below 18, our last born is the only girl of the house and she is 11yrs old

DWJOBScom:


Is your girlfriend working or has a successful endeavour??
It's not easy o

she is working bro, very Business and goal oriented

victooman:
she is working bro, very Business and goal oriented

Pleaae read books on relationship and steady yourselves

victooman:
■ l have a wonderful girlfriend l intended getting married to, but with this family challenges l dont even know when l will settle down, seriously my head is full,, first born in this forum how do yo handle this challenges ?

1. No matter what you do, do not settle for hypogamy in marriage. If your girlfriend does not already have a job and is herself financially stable as a single individual, do not marry her or else chances are over 83% that it will end in tears for you and you will end up strangling your children and their future with the curse of poverty.

You are still too young to worry yourself about marriage. Focus on getting yourself financially stable and established in your business. I say you should give yourself 20 - 30 years to get that done. Marriage is not going anywhere so take your time.

victooman:
my brother even if l become a priest l wont finish this family issues,,,

Dájú
Rúnjú pá
Léjú pá
Kálá
Má ręrín
Wúwá íká

If u don gerrit....fogerrit

Sorry my bro, God4bid poverty.

We go dy alright last last.

victooman:
Thank you very much,my immediate younger brother is working as a sales boy already, 2 of my siblings are are far below 18, our last born is the only girl of the house and she is 11yrs old

Then Gather a little money to set up a little business for your Mom if she is not doing anything. From there she can use it to take care of some the family needs and those your younger siblings can also help her with the little business.

This kind of crisis is a disturbing one. It involves the father, mother, and siblings. You must apply wisdom at all times.

Have a round table talk with your siblings. The talk should be about strategic ways to find a business they can manage and make income. Everyone can pull strengths together to establish and manage one. Or a job they can do to assist the family. Give them a particular time to come up with a plan, let's say a period of 1-month maximum. If they are complacent towards the plan let it reflects on the amount of money that flows from you to them. Reduce it. Maintain your ground, with time they will comply. If not, you withdraw and mind your business.

What should concern you about your aged parents is feeding and shelter (this is a serious burden on you, my friend). Just try your best.

Don't do more than your capacity, because if you die tomorrow they will look for a way to survive. Hence, ensure your survival first and from the convenience of your strength you can render help. If you have been spending too much on your relationship, you better limit it. You should be after the survival and growth of your business than marriage. Focus on the most important thing man.

Thanks.

EmiDon11:
On a normal note, firstborns are naturally useless...

They just are like defenders on a football pitch.
Them no dey progress...

So op no go-to reason am now.
Na so una dey.


I am the lastborn ooo
make una no attack me
IF NOT, I GO CRY

Not first born but breadwinners of the family.

I am not the first Born but my Elder sibling has not sent 1% percent of the money I have to send to my mother this year to her.

I send my mom money weekly but the last time my elder one gave my Mom money was in December.

Once a person has little money in the family he/she automatically takes the responsibility of the family unless that person is naturally wicked not to help with some of the responsibilities.

EmiDon11:
i dey pray make i jam this type wey be my mate...

Aswear na marriage straight...

Ah no go ever cheat on her....

Nevaaaaaaa!!!

Bcuz;

She has all i want in a woman.

God really blessed u jare...

Golibe n' inwere ya

Golibe n' chukwu enyego gi yaa

Smh men lol

You better give yourself sense, without you they will still survive. When you are in school, are they not surviving. You better plan your future and think of your family. The earlier the better.

Kobojunkie:
1. No matter what you do, do not settle for hypogamy in marriage. If your girlfriend does not already have a job and is herself financially stable as a single individual, do not marry her or else chances are over 83% that it will end in tears for you and you will end up strangling your children and their future with the curse of poverty.

You are still too young to worry yourself about marriage. Focus on getting yourself financially stable and established in your business. I say you should give yourself 20 - 30 years to get that done. Marriage is not going anywhere so take your time.

lol, do you know how old l will be in 20yrs time? l am not too young my brother,,

only thing to do is to up your game, if you see that what you are doing isn't enough, try other things. Try new things that could give you money. I mean legit ones

ufotty2001:

Stop complaining you voted for APC

SMH