Hello everyone I never believed witches existed until day before yesterday.

A friend of mine just opened a lounge recently, so on Monday 17th of this month, myself and a few friends went there to patronize him.

Around 7pm when we just arrived, my grandmother called me. She said I should come to her place immediately.

I tried asking her what the problem was, but as usual she shouted and ordered me to arrive her place immediately.

I was disgruntled. I was upset. Heck I was maddddddd.
Just when the fun was about to begin, this woman comes up with this stunt?

I excused myself and ordered a bolt (I never get car).


45 minutes later, I was at my grandma's place.

She smiled at me, called her house keeper to get me some cat fish pepper soup.

She brought out 100 dollar bill and asked me how much d black market exchange rate is. (one of my cousins came back to Nigeria and had given her about 500 dollars last Christmas. This is the first time she wants to spend part of the money. Stingy woman)

This woman dey craze o. So na to ask me about exchange rate make her call me? I just answer her straight say na 500 Naira. At least for distracting me I go collect like 20k for her hand.


She just started laughing. Bobo so you want to do ur granny 419? Dollar is 800 naira na.

See this woman o. In fact I don't have d energy to argue with you. Just gv Me d money and anything that I gv u, u go take.

While I was still angry, I got a phone call from one of my guys. They had just been robbed.

What? I was shocked. You don't mean it. One of my gee was even stabbed.



Ladies and gentlemen that was how I escaped a robbery attack.

Now tell me that my grandma is not a witch.

Instead of thanking God for the old woman you're here calling her a witch.

You are a fool for calling your granny a witch and for also wasting my time and data.

After this testimony u get mind dey call that God sent woman a witch....

For not appreciating God's work.. it will surely happen..

Akwa Ibom people with witchcraft accusations sha.

Y'all should cut this dude some slack now.
The "witch" there was a metaphor.

If I call someone "son of a gun", I hope y'all won't crucify me for referring to one's dad as an Automatic Kalashnikov 49 machine.

If u see witch, you go fit wait?

IceColdVeins:
Y'all should cut this dude some slack now.
The "witch" there was a metaphor.

If I call someone "son of a gun", I hope y'all won't crucify me for referring to one's dad as an Automatic Kalashnikov 49 machine.

U are d only educated person I've read so far

The phrase witch was just used in the sentence to show you how magical her words were, if you understand.....

Get something nice for your grañny . She just saved your life.

And be more sensitive. Life Is more than peppersoup and alcohol.

use the right words for the woman na like angel

leroi01:
Get something nice for your grañny . She just saved your life.

And be more sensitive. Life Is more than peppersoup and alcohol.

Make d guy dey play

...

You go thru skool,school no go thru u.so na that derogatory metaphor of a "witch" naim you see take describe your grandmother wey save your nasty life from iminent death? you no see prophet,life saver or angel to use? my dear something is wrong with you!.

In the mind of an average Nigerian or African, every old person is a witch or wizard , what a mentality . If a pastor had seen it in a vision and told you about it, you would have called him a real man of God ,

V

ublight:
Hello everyone I never believed witches existed until day before yesterday.

A friend of mine just opened a lounge recently, so on Monday 17th of this month, myself and a few friends went there to patronize him.

Around 7pm when we just arrived, my grandmother called me. She said I should come to her place immediately.

I tried asking her what the problem was, but as usual she shouted and ordered me to arrive her place immediately.

I was disgruntled. I was upset. Heck I was maddddddd.
Just when the fun was about to begin, this woman comes up with this stunt?

I excused myself and ordered a bolt (I never get car).


45 minutes later, I was at my grandma's place.

She smiled at me, called her house keeper to get me some cat fish pepper soup.

She brought out 100 dollar bill and asked me how much d black market exchange rate is. (one of my cousins came back to Nigeria and had given her about 500 dollars last Christmas. This is the first time she wants to spend part of the money. Stingy woman)

This woman dey craze o. So na to ask me about exchange rate make her call me? I just answer her straight say na 500 Naira. At least for distracting me I go collect like 20k for her hand.


She just started laughing. Bobo so you want to do ur granny 419? Dollar is 800 naira na.

See this woman o. In fact I don't have d energy to argue with you. Just gv Me d money and anything that I gv u, u go take.

While I was still angry, I got a phone call from one of my guys. They had just been robbed.

What? I was shocked. You don't mean it. One of my gee was even stabbed.



Ladies and gentlemen that was how I escaped a robbery attack.

Now tell me that my grandma is not a witch.

I miss 2 minutes ago, when I never knew this rubbish you typed up here existed

So my brother and I were in school together, dude is renowned mc for campus, one hot girl for campus had a rich bf and that day was her bday, so she paid my bro to MC the bday.

Mom called that evening, I thought it was just a normal checking up on you guys call.

...."take care of your self and your brother" she concluded... Okay ma, thank you bye, I replied, I almost hanged up the call, she said, wait, where do you guys want to go this evening?... eeerrrrm, birthday party mom, I told her ooh. She said you guys should not go out tonight, do you hear me? I said yes ma. She ended the
Call...

I told my bro what mom said, dude was like, eeeh, I don chop part payment finish Na... 7pm dude left for bday at one popular lounge along school road... Me don enter bed sleep ooh.

He was supposed to come back at night, I woke up past 12am to read, I didn't see my bro, called him, his phone was switched off.. my heart was beating faster... I didn't sleep till morning, about 6:30am dude came in and told him fight broke out between two cult groups, sars came in, he was lucky to ran inside bush to hide, dude slept for bush till day break..

So was thinking,what if ??

Also, one time I wanted to travel very early to school... This lady requested I wait for her at park so she will send something to her brother through me, first bus was almost full, I was angry... By the time she arrived, first bus had left, she apologized though, I was calm... I used the second bus, and lo and behold we met the bus along the road, they had accident
😭😭😭😭 some people died..

Sometimes things like these happened to take us out of pending disasters.

ThatrealestApex:


I miss 2 minutes ago, when I never knew this rubbish you typed up here existed

See u. What were u expecting?

pendusky:
So my brother and I were in school together, dude is renowned mc for campus, one hot girl for campus had a rich bf and that day was her bday, so she paid my bro to MC the bday.

Mom called that evening, I thought it was just a normal checking up on you guys call.

...."take care of your self and your brother" she concluded... Okay ma, thank you bye, I replied, I almost hanged up the call, she said, wait, where do you guys want to go this evening?... eeerrrrm, birthday party mom, I told her ooh. She said you guys should not go out tonight, do you hear me? I said yes ma. She ended the
Call...

I told my bro what mom said, dude was like, eeeh, I don chop part payment finish Na... 7pm dude left for bday at one popular lounge along school road... Me don enter bed sleep ooh.

He was supposed to come back at night, I woke up past 12am to read, I didn't see my bro, called him, his phone was switched off.. my heart was beating faster... I didn't sleep till morning, about 6:30am dude came in and told him fight broke out between two cult groups, sars came in, he was lucky to ran inside bush to hide, dude slept for bush till day break..

So was thinking,what if ??

Also, one time I wanted to travel very early to school... This lady requested I wait for her at park so she will send something to her brother through me, first bus was almost full, I was angry... By the time she arrived, first bus had left, she apologized though, I was calm... I used the second bus, and lo and behold we met the bus along the road, they had accident
😭😭😭😭 some people died..

Sometimes things like these happened to take us out of pending disasters.

Correct.

Aladdin1:
You go thru skool,school no go thru u.so na that derogatory metaphor of a "witch" naim you see take describe your grandmother wey save your nasty life from iminent death? you no see prophet,life saver or angel to use? my dear something is wrong with you!.

You didn't go through school. School went through you.

Na certified olodo you be.

leroi01:
Get something nice for your grañny . She just saved your life.

And be more sensitive. Life Is more than peppersoup and alcohol.

U be real nigga

ublight:


You didn't go through school. School went through you.

Na certified olodo you be.

See idiot wey dey call persin olodo.with your bombastic English wey dey make persin purge. i say you be foolish fool! say yes sir!.

ublight:
Hello everyone I never believed witches existed until day before yesterday.

A friend of mine just opened a lounge recently, so on Monday 17th of this month, myself and a few friends went there to patronize him.

Around 7pm when we just arrived, my grandmother called me. She said I should come to her place immediately.

I tried asking her what the problem was, but as usual she shouted and ordered me to arrive her place immediately.

I was disgruntled. I was upset. Heck I was maddddddd.
Just when the fun was about to begin, this woman comes up with this stunt?

I excused myself and ordered a bolt (I never get car).


45 minutes later, I was at my grandma's place.

She smiled at me, called her house keeper to get me some cat fish pepper soup.

She brought out 100 dollar bill and asked me how much d black market exchange rate is. (one of my cousins came back to Nigeria and had given her about 500 dollars last Christmas. This is the first time she wants to spend part of the money. Stingy woman)

This woman dey craze o. So na to ask me about exchange rate make her call me? I just answer her straight say na 500 Naira. At least for distracting me I go collect like 20k for her hand.


She just started laughing. Bobo so you want to do ur granny 419? Dollar is 800 naira na.

See this woman o. In fact I don't have d energy to argue with you. Just gv Me d money and anything that I gv u, u go take.

While I was still angry, I got a phone call from one of my guys. They had just been robbed.

What? I was shocked. You don't mean it. One of my gee was even stabbed.



Ladies and gentlemen that was how I escaped a robbery attack.

Now tell me that my grandma is not a witch.

Lol.
Omo u get luck oo

ublight:


You didn't go through school. School went through you.

Na certified olodo you be.

I dey tell you.

Aladdin1:
See idiot wey dey call persin olodo.with your bombastic English wey dey make persin purge. i say you be foolish fool! say yes sir!.

Ur mama born goat feel say na pikin she born. Ur father wasted his watery sperm on that mad woman u call a mother

I'm that kind of person too
I see things too, I hear things too
Sometimes it comes in my dreams, sometimes it's a voice.....
And it has never failed my friends and family knows this about me.
If I say lets leave just know something bad is about to happen etc..
I saw my father's death months before he died
Even the day he died I felt it instantly.
everyone suggested I stayed in the hospital that night I refused..
There are lots of stories but I can't share them here
What Your grandma and your mum has is a gift that can be taken anytime.
And I know they are people that would never hurt anyone but anyone that hurts them intentionally would be delt with by what we don't know.

Does she use her witchcraft to bring money and protection for you guys?

Not all witches are bad you know.

ublight:
Hello everyone I never believed witches existed until day before yesterday.

A friend of mine just opened a lounge recently, so on Monday 17th of this month, myself and a few friends went there to patronize him.

Around 7pm when we just arrived, my grandmother called me. She said I should come to her place immediately.

I tried asking her what the problem was, but as usual she shouted and ordered me to arrive her place immediately.

I was disgruntled. I was upset. Heck I was maddddddd.
Just when the fun was about to begin, this woman comes up with this stunt?

I excused myself and ordered a bolt (I never get car).


45 minutes later, I was at my grandma's place.

She smiled at me, called her house keeper to get me some cat fish pepper soup.

She brought out 100 dollar bill and asked me how much d black market exchange rate is. (one of my cousins came back to Nigeria and had given her about 500 dollars last Christmas. This is the first time she wants to spend part of the money. Stingy woman)

This woman dey craze o. So na to ask me about exchange rate make her call me? I just answer her straight say na 500 Naira. At least for distracting me I go collect like 20k for her hand.


She just started laughing. Bobo so you want to do ur granny 419? Dollar is 800 naira na.

See this woman o. In fact I don't have d energy to argue with you. Just gv Me d money and anything that I gv u, u go take.

While I was still angry, I got a phone call from one of my guys. They had just been robbed.

What? I was shocked. You don't mean it. One of my gee was even stabbed.



Ladies and gentlemen that was how I escaped a robbery attack.

Now tell me that my grandma is not a witch.

Grow up..

ublight:


Ur mama born goat feel say na pikin she born. Ur father wasted his watery sperm on that mad woman u call a mother

U dey describe your self,your mama and your papa!.Ok i see! no wonder you useless. °WITCH PIKIN"

ublight:
Hello everyone I never believed witches existed until day before yesterday.

A friend of mine just opened a lounge recently, so on Monday 17th of this month, myself and a few friends went there to patronize him.

Around 7pm when we just arrived, my grandmother called me. She said I should come to her place immediately.

I tried asking her what the problem was, but as usual she shouted and ordered me to arrive her place immediately.


See this woman o. In fact I don't have d energy to argue with you. Just gv Me d money and anything that I gv u, u go take.

While I was still angry, I got a phone call from one of my guys. They had just been robbed.

What? I was shocked. You don't mean it. One of my gee was even stabbed.



Ladies and gentlemen that was how I escaped a robbery attack.

Now tell me that my grandma is not a witch.

You are just an ingrate. Your Grandma saved your life from impending disaster and you have the effrontery to call her a witch. What if you did not come to her place and you were the only one that got killed.