| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by randymirrors(f): 2:50am On May 25, 2023 |
ChybuzzDD:
Your usual thread-derailing strategy didn't work here, as no one was ready to engage you.
That's great.
One day, we'll be able to find out if you're actually a bot or a virus that infected the platform  .
As in.. that girl is a crazy one. Not mentally ok. Always going off. Her brain always seems to waltz differently 😂 |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by grandstar(m): 2:51am On May 25, 2023 |
CuriousMind2022:
It's a known fact that most Nigerian girls marry who they consider ready for marriage and not necessarily who they love. I am exactly in that dilemma and the question I am asking myself is whether I should continue in this loveless marriage or slowly drift and walk away.
My marriage is barely 2 years and a few months, but it has been a rough journey for me. Things I never envisaged I would experience in my marriage, I have suffered, from utmost disrespect to verbal abuse.
I came to the conclusion that she doesn't love or care about me based on what happened yesterday. I was recently transferred from my base to a new location and because of that, I would only be able to visit weekends or twice a month. Prior to that, we barely had sex once a week.
We had already had sex the normal once we usually had it (Saturday morning), but I wanted more because I will only be coming back after two weeks. I initiated a move on Sunday morning, she declined because she was thinking of preparing food for our baby before we leave for church. We went to church and came back, and as usual, my wife was in her undies (just panties and bra) in the sitting room (This was what she wore throughout that Sunday).
I watched her walk around the house in that and that even turned me on the more. I am a practicing Christian, and I try not to look after other women lustfully, but common this is my wife, even God sanctions that. After being turned on throughout the day, I went to my wife in the night, (note she slept in the sitting room with our baby leaving me alone in the room) to enjoy my conjugal rights with her, but she gave me excuses that she is upset and not in the mood.
I left and went back, seriously konjified, I managed to sleep. The next morning, I woke up with my urges and went to the sitting room to have my morning devotion, but I could barely concentrate because I was still very Hot. I explained to her that so really wants me to go to my new station like this knowing fully well I will not be coming back until 2 weeks time. This woman did not care!
I took my bath, prepared myself, and set out for my office. I was not happy with her but I kept my cool and left for work. She had demanded that I dropped some money for her before leaving and despite the fact that I was not happy with her, I dropped the money in a conspicuous place where I know she will see it before leaving. This was my own way of saying I am not happy with what you did, but I still cared.
I try to do things I usually do for my wife even when I am angry with her. This is my own way of saying I may be angry with you, but I still cared about you and I am open to a resolution. On the other hand, my wife doesn't care what happens to me when she is upset. She immediately stops cooking for me ad any other thing she does for me when she is upset. It is obvious to me now that to my wife I don't really matter in the grand scheme of things. She is only caring and concerned, when she is not angry (when we are good and we don't have any issues). I believe that when you love somebody, you treat them right and show genuine love and care for them even when you're upset with them. This is what I have constantly shown to my wife in our 2+ years of marriage.
Back to my story of what happened weekend/Monday. My wife never bothered to call me to check if I arrived safely since I left the house yesterday. I even called her once (primarily to check on my daughter), but she didn't pick up and she didn't call back, and up till now, we have not spoken.
She obviously does not care whether I arrived safely in my station or not. In this country of insecurities, a family member of yours will travel and you do not care whether he/she arrived safely, that is the height for me, and in the actual sense, I should be the one upset here because she left me high and dry, despite knowing fully well I am very Hot.
I am a family-oriented person, I have always dreamt of having a peaceful, loving, and Godly home but unfortunately, the reverse is the case for my wife. I began to understand why family background is very important in a person's life, after getting married. My wife is from a family where they place little or no value on marriage. Her mother had children with 2 men, and my wife is obviously working very hard to follow that same path. She shows little or no enthusiasm in making our marriage work. I am always the one to initiate moves to resolve issues when we quarrel, whether I am right or wrong, I do not care, my focus is just on making my marriage work and my home peaceful.
This last episode shook me very hard, and I have been asking myself whether I want to continue in this loveless marriage or opt out. Working and living in a different city will even make it easier for me.
I needed to let my thoughts out and thanks to Nairaland, I have done so.
WHATEVER you do, ensure you have no more kids until you're 1,000% sure she cares about you or wants the marriage to work or else, you'll just be giving her a firmer grip on you. 2 Likes |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by Kobojunkie: 2:52am On May 25, 2023 |
Madas1986:
■ try to dey read in between the lines so you won't be failing exams mtchew If you actually took your own advice there you would have immediately realized that OP left out the most important information of all which is what lead up to his wife ignoring him to the point of reducing their sex life to once a week. There is almost always a reason. If you had consulted his profile you would have gotten the first hint.  |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by franksam2009: 3:02am On May 25, 2023 |
CuriousMind2022:
It's a known fact that most
I needed to let my thoughts out and thanks to Nairaland, I have done so.
these writeups clearly shows you Nag alot, you have no pride, you talk too much, these things can turn her off and make her stop seeing you as a sex partner... How can you even be explaining to a woman that you need sex before going to work, like wtf!!!!, Big turn off Give her some space, spice up your marriage, sometimes take her out, buy her favorite snacks when coming back from work, rather than begging for sex at night, you can instead gist, tease her, play with her, |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by 1stola: 3:51am On May 25, 2023 |
CuriousMind2022:
It's a known fact that most Nigerian girls marry who they consider ready for marriage and not necessarily who they love. I am exactly in that dilemma and the question I am asking myself is whether I should continue in this loveless marriage or slowly drift and walk away.
My marriage is barely 2 years and a few months, but it has been a rough journey for me. Things I never envisaged I would experience in my marriage, I have suffered, from utmost disrespect to verbal abuse.
I came to the conclusion that she doesn't love or care about me based on what happened yesterday. I was recently transferred from my base to a new location and because of that, I would only be able to visit weekends or twice a month. Prior to that, we barely had sex once a week.
We had already had sex the normal once we usually had it (Saturday morning), but I wanted more because I will only be coming back after two weeks. I initiated a move on Sunday morning, she declined because she was thinking of preparing food for our baby before we leave for church. We went to church and came back, and as usual, my wife was in her undies (just panties and bra) in the sitting room (This was what she wore throughout that Sunday).
I watched her walk around the house in that and that even turned me on the more. I am a practicing Christian, and I try not to look after other women lustfully, but common this is my wife, even God sanctions that. After being turned on throughout the day, I went to my wife in the night, (note she slept in the sitting room with our baby leaving me alone in the room) to enjoy my conjugal rights with her, but she gave me excuses that she is upset and not in the mood.
I left and went back, seriously konjified, I managed to sleep. The next morning, I woke up with my urges and went to the sitting room to have my morning devotion, but I could barely concentrate because I was still very Hot. I explained to her that so really wants me to go to my new station like this knowing fully well I will not be coming back until 2 weeks time. This woman did not care!
I took my bath, prepared myself, and set out for my office. I was not happy with her but I kept my cool and left for work. She had demanded that I dropped some money for her before leaving and despite the fact that I was not happy with her, I dropped the money in a conspicuous place where I know she will see it before leaving. This was my own way of saying I am not happy with what you did, but I still cared.
I try to do things I usually do for my wife even when I am angry with her. This is my own way of saying I may be angry with you, but I still cared about you and I am open to a resolution. On the other hand, my wife doesn't care what happens to me when she is upset. She immediately stops cooking for me ad any other thing she does for me when she is upset. It is obvious to me now that to my wife I don't really matter in the grand scheme of things. She is only caring and concerned, when she is not angry (when we are good and we don't have any issues). I believe that when you love somebody, you treat them right and show genuine love and care for them even when you're upset with them. This is what I have constantly shown to my wife in our 2+ years of marriage.
Back to my story of what happened weekend/Monday. My wife never bothered to call me to check if I arrived safely since I left the house yesterday. I even called her once (primarily to check on my daughter), but she didn't pick up and she didn't call back, and up till now, we have not spoken.
She obviously does not care whether I arrived safely in my station or not. In this country of insecurities, a family member of yours will travel and you do not care whether he/she arrived safely, that is the height for me, and in the actual sense, I should be the one upset here because she left me high and dry, despite knowing fully well I am very Hot.
I am a family-oriented person, I have always dreamt of having a peaceful, loving, and Godly home but unfortunately, the reverse is the case for my wife. I began to understand why family background is very important in a person's life, after getting married. My wife is from a family where they place little or no value on marriage. Her mother had children with 2 men, and my wife is obviously working very hard to follow that same path. She shows little or no enthusiasm in making our marriage work. I am always the one to initiate moves to resolve issues when we quarrel, whether I am right or wrong, I do not care, my focus is just on making my marriage work and my home peaceful.
This last episode shook me very hard, and I have been asking myself whether I want to continue in this loveless marriage or opt out. Working and living in a different city will even make it easier for me.
I needed to let my thoughts out and thanks to Nairaland, I have done so.
If you had married a virgin, you won't be in this situation. The moment girls have sexual experience with a man, she builds attachments with him... NOW IMAGINE A GIRL WITH MULTIPLE BODYCOUNT, HOW CAN THAT GIRL BE CAPABLE OF LOVING ANYONE BUT HERSELF... 3 Likes |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by alllivesmatter(m): 4:11am On May 25, 2023 |
Kobojunkie:
All I read is you equate love with sex and your wife denying you sex means she has no love for you. And you somehow think the blame should all be on her as far as all the problems you perceive in your marriage, no be so? **yawn*** I think it's unreasonable for you to say this to someone who is married. Sex is very crucial in marriage and a spouse must not deny the other no matter the grudge. Granted that one might not be in the mood or one may be sick, but if a spouse is empathetic enough, they wouldn't wait until the other person cries and wails before they get some action. We haven't heard the wife's part yet but damn....Men do suffer a lot in marriages. |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by alllivesmatter(m): 4:16am On May 25, 2023 |
being:
Those are relationships. In marriage, it can be very different. To be sure, constant retaliations like that is a leading cause of marriage breakdowns... OP get her(&u) counselling fast!!! Counselling at whose expense let's assume they need to consult a professional therapist or counsellor or anyone. You see how one person pile up problems and issues for the other just because of mood swings? |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by kentornic: 4:32am On May 25, 2023 |
Bro....Are you sure i am not you and you are not me.. How come we are experiencing EXACTLY the same thing...No this is unusual. Are we dealing with the same woman. Wooooww.. and to cap it all...Mine is also from a home where the mother has children from different men. Now I know why my lady is behaving like this. It is the family background....Just woowww CuriousMind2022:
It's a known fact that most Nigerian girls marry who they consider ready for marriage and not necessarily who they love. I am exactly in that dilemma and the question I am asking myself is whether I should continue in this loveless marriage or slowly drift and walk away.
My marriage is barely 2 years and a few months, but it has been a rough journey for me. Things I never envisaged I would experience in my marriage, I have suffered, from utmost disrespect to verbal abuse.
I came to the conclusion that she doesn't love or care about me based on what happened yesterday. I was recently transferred from my base to a new location and because of that, I would only be able to visit weekends or twice a month. Prior to that, we barely had sex once a week.
We had already had sex the normal once we usually had it (Saturday morning), but I wanted more because I will only be coming back after two weeks. I initiated a move on Sunday morning, she declined because she was thinking of preparing food for our baby before we leave for church. We went to church and came back, and as usual, my wife was in her undies (just panties and bra) in the sitting room (This was what she wore throughout that Sunday).
I watched her walk around the house in that and that even turned me on the more. I am a practicing Christian, and I try not to look after other women lustfully, but common this is my wife, even God sanctions that. After being turned on throughout the day, I went to my wife in the night, (note she slept in the sitting room with our baby leaving me alone in the room) to enjoy my conjugal rights with her, but she gave me excuses that she is upset and not in the mood.
I left and went back, seriously konjified, I managed to sleep. The next morning, I woke up with my urges and went to the sitting room to have my morning devotion, but I could barely concentrate because I was still very Hot. I explained to her that so really wants me to go to my new station like this knowing fully well I will not be coming back until 2 weeks time. This woman did not care!
I took my bath, prepared myself, and set out for my office. I was not happy with her but I kept my cool and left for work. She had demanded that I dropped some money for her before leaving and despite the fact that I was not happy with her, I dropped the money in a conspicuous place where I know she will see it before leaving. This was my own way of saying I am not happy with what you did, but I still cared.
I try to do things I usually do for my wife even when I am angry with her. This is my own way of saying I may be angry with you, but I still cared about you and I am open to a resolution. On the other hand, my wife doesn't care what happens to me when she is upset. She immediately stops cooking for me ad any other thing she does for me when she is upset. It is obvious to me now that to my wife I don't really matter in the grand scheme of things. She is only caring and concerned, when she is not angry (when we are good and we don't have any issues). I believe that when you love somebody, you treat them right and show genuine love and care for them even when you're upset with them. This is what I have constantly shown to my wife in our 2+ years of marriage.
Back to my story of what happened weekend/Monday. My wife never bothered to call me to check if I arrived safely since I left the house yesterday. I even called her once (primarily to check on my daughter), but she didn't pick up and she didn't call back, and up till now, we have not spoken.
She obviously does not care whether I arrived safely in my station or not. In this country of insecurities, a family member of yours will travel and you do not care whether he/she arrived safely, that is the height for me, and in the actual sense, I should be the one upset here because she left me high and dry, despite knowing fully well I am very Hot.
I am a family-oriented person, I have always dreamt of having a peaceful, loving, and Godly home but unfortunately, the reverse is the case for my wife. I began to understand why family background is very important in a person's life, after getting married. My wife is from a family where they place little or no value on marriage. Her mother had children with 2 men, and my wife is obviously working very hard to follow that same path. She shows little or no enthusiasm in making our marriage work. I am always the one to initiate moves to resolve issues when we quarrel, whether I am right or wrong, I do not care, my focus is just on making my marriage work and my home peaceful.
This last episode shook me very hard, and I have been asking myself whether I want to continue in this loveless marriage or opt out. Working and living in a different city will even make it easier for me.
I needed to let my thoughts out and thanks to Nairaland, I have done so.
|
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by modelsms(m): 4:37am On May 25, 2023 |
Kobojunkie:
What I clearly understood is that there is more to the tale that Op spun here in his oP. If you read some of his follow-up tales, you would see this too. There is a reason why the wife is the way she is towards OP and it has to do with some discovery OP didn't reveal in his main post. It doesn't seem so. That woman isn't family oriented and doesn't care so much about that man |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by Kobojunkie: 4:38am On May 25, 2023 |
modelsms:
It doesn't seem so. That woman isn't family oriented and doesn't care so much about that man oh please! |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by akilo1: 5:09am On May 25, 2023 |
You be ashawao man |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by Exedyne: 5:14am On May 25, 2023 |
CuriousMind2022:
It's a known fact that most Nigerian girls marry who they consider ready for marriage and not necessarily who they love. I am exactly in that dilemma and the question I am asking myself is whether I should continue in this loveless marriage or slowly drift and walk away.
My marriage is barely 2 years and a few months, but it has been a rough journey for me. Things I never envisaged I would experience in my marriage, I have suffered, from utmost disrespect to verbal abuse.
I came to the conclusion that she doesn't love or care about me based on what happened yesterday. I was recently transferred from my base to a new location and because of that, I would only be able to visit weekends or twice a month. Prior to that, we barely had sex once a week.
We had already had sex the normal once we usually had it (Saturday morning), but I wanted more because I will only be coming back after two weeks. I initiated a move on Sunday morning, she declined because she was thinking of preparing food for our baby before we leave for church. We went to church and came back, and as usual, my wife was in her undies (just panties and bra) in the sitting room (This was what she wore throughout that Sunday).
I watched her walk around the house in that and that even turned me on the more. I am a practicing Christian, and I try not to look after other women lustfully, but common this is my wife, even God sanctions that. After being turned on throughout the day, I went to my wife in the night, (note she slept in the sitting room with our baby leaving me alone in the room) to enjoy my conjugal rights with her, but she gave me excuses that she is upset and not in the mood.
I left and went back, seriously konjified, I managed to sleep. The next morning, I woke up with my urges and went to the sitting room to have my morning devotion, but I could barely concentrate because I was still very Hot. I explained to her that so really wants me to go to my new station like this knowing fully well I will not be coming back until 2 weeks time. This woman did not care!
I took my bath, prepared myself, and set out for my office. I was not happy with her but I kept my cool and left for work. She had demanded that I dropped some money for her before leaving and despite the fact that I was not happy with her, I dropped the money in a conspicuous place where I know she will see it before leaving. This was my own way of saying I am not happy with what you did, but I still cared.
I try to do things I usually do for my wife even when I am angry with her. This is my own way of saying I may be angry with you, but I still cared about you and I am open to a resolution. On the other hand, my wife doesn't care what happens to me when she is upset. She immediately stops cooking for me ad any other thing she does for me when she is upset. It is obvious to me now that to my wife I don't really matter in the grand scheme of things. She is only caring and concerned, when she is not angry (when we are good and we don't have any issues). I believe that when you love somebody, you treat them right and show genuine love and care for them even when you're upset with them. This is what I have constantly shown to my wife in our 2+ years of marriage.
Back to my story of what happened weekend/Monday. My wife never bothered to call me to check if I arrived safely since I left the house yesterday. I even called her once (primarily to check on my daughter), but she didn't pick up and she didn't call back, and up till now, we have not spoken.
She obviously does not care whether I arrived safely in my station or not. In this country of insecurities, a family member of yours will travel and you do not care whether he/she arrived safely, that is the height for me, and in the actual sense, I should be the one upset here because she left me high and dry, despite knowing fully well I am very Hot.
I am a family-oriented person, I have always dreamt of having a peaceful, loving, and Godly home but unfortunately, the reverse is the case for my wife. I began to understand why family background is very important in a person's life, after getting married. My wife is from a family where they place little or no value on marriage. Her mother had children with 2 men, and my wife is obviously working very hard to follow that same path. She shows little or no enthusiasm in making our marriage work. I am always the one to initiate moves to resolve issues when we quarrel, whether I am right or wrong, I do not care, my focus is just on making my marriage work and my home peaceful.
This last episode shook me very hard, and I have been asking myself whether I want to continue in this loveless marriage or opt out. Working and living in a different city will even make it easier for me.
I needed to let my thoughts out and thanks to Nairaland, I have done so.
You Don marry damaged goods. Take heart boss 1 Like |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by cococandy(f): 5:37am On May 25, 2023 |
Send her a link to this thread. I believe she’s the one who needs counseling (based on the premise that what you said is 100% true). But she can’t change if everyone is talking to you instead of her. Her who needs to do the change CuriousMind2022:
It's a known fact that most Nigerian girls marry who they consider ready for marriage and not necessarily who they love. I am exactly in that dilemma and the question I am asking myself is whether I should continue in this loveless marriage or slowly drift and walk away.
My marriage is barely 2 years and a few months, but it has been a rough journey for me. Things I never envisaged I would experience in my marriage, I have suffered, from utmost disrespect to verbal abuse.
I came to the conclusion that she doesn't love or care about me based on what happened yesterday. I was recently transferred from my base to a new location and because of that, I would only be able to visit weekends or twice a month. Prior to that, we barely had sex once a week.
We had already had sex the normal once we usually had it (Saturday morning), but I wanted more because I will only be coming back after two weeks. I initiated a move on Sunday morning, she declined because she was thinking of preparing food for our baby before we leave for church. We went to church and came back, and as usual, my wife was in her undies (just panties and bra) in the sitting room (This was what she wore throughout that Sunday).
I watched her walk around the house in that and that even turned me on the more. I am a practicing Christian, and I try not to look after other women lustfully, but common this is my wife, even God sanctions that. After being turned on throughout the day, I went to my wife in the night, (note she slept in the sitting room with our baby leaving me alone in the room) to enjoy my conjugal rights with her, but she gave me excuses that she is upset and not in the mood.
I left and went back, seriously konjified, I managed to sleep. The next morning, I woke up with my urges and went to the sitting room to have my morning devotion, but I could barely concentrate because I was still very Hot. I explained to her that so really wants me to go to my new station like this knowing fully well I will not be coming back until 2 weeks time. This woman did not care!
I took my bath, prepared myself, and set out for my office. I was not happy with her but I kept my cool and left for work. She had demanded that I dropped some money for her before leaving and despite the fact that I was not happy with her, I dropped the money in a conspicuous place where I know she will see it before leaving. This was my own way of saying I am not happy with what you did, but I still cared.
I try to do things I usually do for my wife even when I am angry with her. This is my own way of saying I may be angry with you, but I still cared about you and I am open to a resolution. On the other hand, my wife doesn't care what happens to me when she is upset. She immediately stops cooking for me ad any other thing she does for me when she is upset. It is obvious to me now that to my wife I don't really matter in the grand scheme of things. She is only caring and concerned, when she is not angry (when we are good and we don't have any issues). I believe that when you love somebody, you treat them right and show genuine love and care for them even when you're upset with them. This is what I have constantly shown to my wife in our 2+ years of marriage.
Back to my story of what happened weekend/Monday. My wife never bothered to call me to check if I arrived safely since I left the house yesterday. I even called her once (primarily to check on my daughter), but she didn't pick up and she didn't call back, and up till now, we have not spoken.
She obviously does not care whether I arrived safely in my station or not. In this country of insecurities, a family member of yours will travel and you do not care whether he/she arrived safely, that is the height for me, and in the actual sense, I should be the one upset here because she left me high and dry, despite knowing fully well I am very Hot.
I am a family-oriented person, I have always dreamt of having a peaceful, loving, and Godly home but unfortunately, the reverse is the case for my wife. I began to understand why family background is very important in a person's life, after getting married. My wife is from a family where they place little or no value on marriage. Her mother had children with 2 men, and my wife is obviously working very hard to follow that same path. She shows little or no enthusiasm in making our marriage work. I am always the one to initiate moves to resolve issues when we quarrel, whether I am right or wrong, I do not care, my focus is just on making my marriage work and my home peaceful.
This last episode shook me very hard, and I have been asking myself whether I want to continue in this loveless marriage or opt out. Working and living in a different city will even make it easier for me.
I needed to let my thoughts out and thanks to Nairaland, I have done so.
3 Likes 3 Shares |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by Faposky95: 5:54am On May 25, 2023 |
CuriousMind2022:
It's a known fact that most Nigerian girls marry who they consider ready for marriage and not necessarily who they love. I am exactly in that dilemma and the question I am asking myself is whether I should continue in this loveless marriage or slowly drift and walk away.
My marriage is barely 2 years and a few months, but it has been a rough journey for me. Things I never envisaged I would experience in my marriage, I have suffered, from utmost disrespect to verbal abuse.
I came to the conclusion that she doesn't love or care about me based on what happened yesterday. I was recently transferred from my base to a new location and because of that, I would only be able to visit weekends or twice a month. Prior to that, we barely had sex once a week.
We had already had sex the normal once we usually had it (Saturday morning), but I wanted more because I will only be coming back after two weeks. I initiated a move on Sunday morning, she declined because she was thinking of preparing food for our baby before we leave for church. We went to church and came back, and as usual, my wife was in her undies (just panties and bra) in the sitting room (This was what she wore throughout that Sunday).
I watched her walk around the house in that and that even turned me on the more. I am a practicing Christian, and I try not to look after other women lustfully, but common this is my wife, even God sanctions that. After being turned on throughout the day, I went to my wife in the night, (note she slept in the sitting room with our baby leaving me alone in the room) to enjoy my conjugal rights with her, but she gave me excuses that she is upset and not in the mood.
I left and went back, seriously konjified, I managed to sleep. The next morning, I woke up with my urges and went to the sitting room to have my morning devotion, but I could barely concentrate because I was still very Hot. I explained to her that so really wants me to go to my new station like this knowing fully well I will not be coming back until 2 weeks time. This woman did not care!
I took my bath, prepared myself, and set out for my office. I was not happy with her but I kept my cool and left for work. She had demanded that I dropped some money for her before leaving and despite the fact that I was not happy with her, I dropped the money in a conspicuous place where I know she will see it before leaving. This was my own way of saying I am not happy with what you did, but I still cared.
I try to do things I usually do for my wife even when I am angry with her. This is my own way of saying I may be angry with you, but I still cared about you and I am open to a resolution. On the other hand, my wife doesn't care what happens to me when she is upset. She immediately stops cooking for me ad any other thing she does for me when she is upset. It is obvious to me now that to my wife I don't really matter in the grand scheme of things. She is only caring and concerned, when she is not angry (when we are good and we don't have any issues). I believe that when you love somebody, you treat them right and show genuine love and care for them even when you're upset with them. This is what I have constantly shown to my wife in our 2+ years of marriage.
Back to my story of what happened weekend/Monday. My wife never bothered to call me to check if I arrived safely since I left the house yesterday. I even called her once (primarily to check on my daughter), but she didn't pick up and she didn't call back, and up till now, we have not spoken.
She obviously does not care whether I arrived safely in my station or not. In this country of insecurities, a family member of yours will travel and you do not care whether he/she arrived safely, that is the height for me, and in the actual sense, I should be the one upset here because she left me high and dry, despite knowing fully well I am very Hot.
I am a family-oriented person, I have always dreamt of having a peaceful, loving, and Godly home but unfortunately, the reverse is the case for my wife. I began to understand why family background is very important in a person's life, after getting married. My wife is from a family where they place little or no value on marriage. Her mother had children with 2 men, and my wife is obviously working very hard to follow that same path. She shows little or no enthusiasm in making our marriage work. I am always the one to initiate moves to resolve issues when we quarrel, whether I am right or wrong, I do not care, my focus is just on making my marriage work and my home peaceful.
This last episode shook me very hard, and I have been asking myself whether I want to continue in this loveless marriage or opt out. Working and living in a different city will even make it easier for me.
I needed to let my thoughts out and thanks to Nairaland, I have done so.
I see why the WHITEs go through the motions before they commit...men or women Here, we enter and then start our post adolescent adventures..... Why...? Cos, divorce is not enshrined yet in our lives It's getting there... The norm of appropriating sectional faults to the sexes based on mere feelings instead of the commitment the adults swore to undertake is on the rise. You also got married to stop a man from chasing other women, vice versa....if you can't help profer solution.... Soon, MARRIEDs be the laughing stock and the cause why the marriage will lose its taste. |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by Fuckyoumod: 6:01am On May 25, 2023 |
being:
Those are relationships. In marriage, it can be very different. To be sure, constant retaliations like that is a leading cause of marriage breakdowns... OP get her(&u) counselling fast!!! All you do is criticize others and their solutions to a problem. But you have no single solution. A typical Nigerian. Do you really understand the concept of marriage? So your concept of marriage is for the man to die in a loveless marriage? Suffer constant abuses, emotional and psychological torture all in the name of marriage? Are you even aware that women are home builders and keep homes together? Are you aware of the enormous roles and responsibilities of a married woman. Marriage is a 50 - 50 effort. I love myself.... Personally I can't take what OP is going through. OP is a good man that should be loved, cared for and appreciated. That wife of his does not deserve such a man. I will continue to warn women.... Stop deceiving and marrying men you don't love, because this will be the end result. You will hate him, careless about him and will never appreciate whatever he does, at so point you will regret and even want him dead. Stop 🛑 marrying men you don't love. OP, you will labour in vain in that marriage of yours if you fail to exact your authority and let her know you are a man. By giving her a dose of what you have being going through. It she can't take it and wants to leave let her leave. The most dangerous thing for any man to do is to be married to a woman that does not love you.... You are doomed if you continue with such marriage. mark my words! 2 Likes |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by EndRape2(f): 6:17am On May 25, 2023 |
Stpp talking when mature and married people are seeking marital advice,
Stay aside,
quote author=JeffreyJunior post=123326345]Just 2years into your marriage, you guys are already having all these issues.
Why the heck did you marry who wasn't into you or will you swear you didn't see the warning signs?
Oga when the kitchen becomes too hot, a wise person knows the best choice is to leave.
Leave the marriage or get a sidechick mek everybody rest.[/quote] |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by boxypane(m): 6:18am On May 25, 2023 |
nedekid:
A lady that is not working, the man should come back home and do chores etc?  Are you married? |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by nedekid: 6:19am On May 25, 2023 |
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| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by Klass99(f): 7:08am On May 25, 2023 |
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| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by masks(m): 7:15am On May 25, 2023 |
Kobojunkie:
All I read is you equate love with sex and your wife denying you sex means she has no love for you. And you somehow think the blame should all be on her as far as all the problems you perceive in your marriage, no be so? **yawn*** Oga please read again...Seems you read just one line. |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by Kenechukwu98: 7:37am On May 25, 2023 |
Well sorry about that mistake well she married cos of someone ready so I guess she wasn't your friend before this happen, I saw some people writing off sex.. what if I tell you that sex helps in ur marriage? Well the fact is that she really not having the same amount of commitment to this marriage but since a daughter is involve my mouth pim(🔒.. firstly talk to her about it. Tell her she really needs to change if prove abortive inform her parents. Why am saying is that marriage is a long time journey and it just started so you can be angry at me when I urge for sex and expect me to fulfill my fatherly role properly cos there is no way I can concentrate to it. So talk to her, tell her all she is doing wrong because if you endure it at this start trust me you may regret ur marriage life I mean all of ur life.. most times love is not enough because there is no way ur partner will make such a journey without you checking on him/her no matter what you must hear their journey mercy first if truly you love and cherish them..their is a possibility she is cheating on you but sad truth is I can never marry who is not my friend or someone who makes me feel less loved .. we will go our way .. my happiness has a lot to do with me. For someone who really loves you to deny u sex there is a reason for that.. most women thinks sex is nothing but I can te you that without sex about 80% of men will find nothing else attractive in their marriage or will not even stay .. but I believe if you don't care about me I will try my best to contribute same vibe to the table.. not all time you need peace something you let peace away and behave same way their do to you I believe she will have a rethink.. if you deny sex I will deny you some times you need from me..yes I will deny it. Anybody can call me any name but the truth is you care so much about the wrong lady |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by Curdlebug(m): 7:41am On May 25, 2023 |
Kobojunkie:
All I read is you equate love with sex and your wife denying you sex means she has no love for you. And you somehow think the blame should all be on her as far as all the problems you perceive in your marriage, no be so? **yawn*** You can't be this dumb... Nawa ooo |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by obalola007(m): 7:44am On May 25, 2023 |
Whyzaid:
OP! There is a way you will assist your woman with home chores that will send a signal to her that you want her on your lap at night. Try to be more loving sir. And I could see that you don't know her love language and possibly she doesn't know yours too, the reason why you are complaining here |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by obalola007(m): 7:45am On May 25, 2023 |
Whyzaid:
OP! There is a way you will assist your woman with home chores that will send a signal to her that you want her on your lap at night. Try to be more loving sir. And I could see that you don't know her love language and possibly she doesn't know yours too, the reason why you are complaining here The best reply I've ever read on this thread, we men let's learn to understand our women Bleep language. Most women are shy to tell there husband they want to Bleep. There are some things that can make her fall on ur lap despite say na ur wife. |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by GoodCane: 8:20am On May 25, 2023 |
CuriousMind2022:
I needed to let my thoughts out and thanks to Nairaland, I have done so.
Dude, you knew women marry who's ready and not who they love yet you still went ahead and married her knowing fully well that she sees as a ready option for marriage. That woman doesn love you. She only sees you as a means of survival. Be rest assured that she has another man elsewhere banging her Pussy and I can bet my balls she was waiting for you to leave the house before inviting the man over. You're a SIMP! This is because a sane man cannot be married and be complaining about lack of sex in his marriage when there are girls everywhere. Only Simp does that. Dude, the earlier you chase that woman out of your house to go and meet the man who has been fvcking her while you were away, the better for you. 1 Like |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by GoodCane: 8:21am On May 25, 2023 |
Curdlebug:
You can't be this dumb... Nawa ooo That guy is an idiot. Y'all should learn to ignore him on this nairaland. That is how the fool goes around displaying his stupidity everywhere. Make una ignore the Werey |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by Fuckyoumod: 8:34am On May 25, 2023 |
nedekid:
A lady that is not working, the man should come back home and do chores etc? Don't mind their useless advise. After a hard day's job, you still expecting him to come home and wash plate. The funny thing about this stupid advise is that they think every man is wired the same way. The fact that they are dish washers in their homes, does not give them the right to turn every man into dish washers. If you are a woman and you are comfortable watching and turning your husband, the man you claim to love into a dish washer. Then you are a bad woman. You are not fit to be married. Just remain in your father's house. A woman must first understand her roles as a wife. Some of this ladies that end up marrying men they don't love are bent on making marriage hell for their husbands. Men, marry who love you ooh! All this nonsense will never surface in the first place. I pity OP, he is the only one that cares about the marriage. (The wife no send am message). And as long as he is scared of taking certain actions and putting his marriage in the right direction. His wife will just be using and toiling with his mental, emotions and psychology wellbeing. Then BP will set in.... Unnecessary illnesses will start creeping in. Don't waste your life on earth trying to please a wife that does not give a fvck about you. 3 Likes |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by virginchaser(m): 8:35am On May 25, 2023 |
The hard fact is that there is no sure escape route for you based on people's experiences. If you have girlfriend you will be concerned about STD. If you marry another one she could be worse after marriage. Take her out on holidays, talk to her, play with her and pet her. If she doesn't change? File in a divorce and take your chance. |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by dnawah(m): 8:54am On May 25, 2023 |
CuriousMind2022:
It's a known fact that most Nigerian girls marry who they consider ready for marriage and not necessarily who they love. I am exactly in that dilemma and the question I am asking myself is whether I should continue in this loveless marriage or slowly drift and walk away.
My marriage is barely 2 years and a few months, but it has been a rough journey for me. Things I never envisaged I would experience in my marriage, I have suffered, from utmost disrespect to verbal abuse.
I came to the conclusion that she doesn't love or care about me based on what happened yesterday. I was recently transferred from my base to a new location and because of that, I would only be able to visit weekends or twice a month. Prior to that, we barely had sex once a week.
We had already had sex the normal once we usually had it (Saturday morning), but I wanted more because I will only be coming back after two weeks. I initiated a move on Sunday morning, she declined because she was thinking of preparing food for our baby before we leave for church. We went to church and came back, and as usual, my wife was in her undies (just panties and bra) in the sitting room (This was what she wore throughout that Sunday).
I watched her walk around the house in that and that even turned me on the more. I am a practicing Christian, and I try not to look after other women lustfully, but common this is my wife, even God sanctions that. After being turned on throughout the day, I went to my wife in the night, (note she slept in the sitting room with our baby leaving me alone in the room) to enjoy my conjugal rights with her, but she gave me excuses that she is upset and not in the mood.
I left and went back, seriously konjified, I managed to sleep. The next morning, I woke up with my urges and went to the sitting room to have my morning devotion, but I could barely concentrate because I was still very Hot. I explained to her that so really wants me to go to my new station like this knowing fully well I will not be coming back until 2 weeks time. This woman did not care!
I took my bath, prepared myself, and set out for my office. I was not happy with her but I kept my cool and left for work. She had demanded that I dropped some money for her before leaving and despite the fact that I was not happy with her, I dropped the money in a conspicuous place where I know she will see it before leaving. This was my own way of saying I am not happy with what you did, but I still cared.
I try to do things I usually do for my wife even when I am angry with her. This is my own way of saying I may be angry with you, but I still cared about you and I am open to a resolution. On the other hand, my wife doesn't care what happens to me when she is upset. She immediately stops cooking for me ad any other thing she does for me when she is upset. It is obvious to me now that to my wife I don't really matter in the grand scheme of things. She is only caring and concerned, when she is not angry (when we are good and we don't have any issues). I believe that when you love somebody, you treat them right and show genuine love and care for them even when you're upset with them. This is what I have constantly shown to my wife in our 2+ years of marriage.
Back to my story of what happened weekend/Monday. My wife never bothered to call me to check if I arrived safely since I left the house yesterday. I even called her once (primarily to check on my daughter), but she didn't pick up and she didn't call back, and up till now, we have not spoken.
She obviously does not care whether I arrived safely in my station or not. In this country of insecurities, a family member of yours will travel and you do not care whether he/she arrived safely, that is the height for me, and in the actual sense, I should be the one upset here because she left me high and dry, despite knowing fully well I am very Hot.
I am a family-oriented person, I have always dreamt of having a peaceful, loving, and Godly home but unfortunately, the reverse is the case for my wife. I began to understand why family background is very important in a person's life, after getting married. My wife is from a family where they place little or no value on marriage. Her mother had children with 2 men, and my wife is obviously working very hard to follow that same path. She shows little or no enthusiasm in making our marriage work. I am always the one to initiate moves to resolve issues when we quarrel, whether I am right or wrong, I do not care, my focus is just on making my marriage work and my home peaceful.
This last episode shook me very hard, and I have been asking myself whether I want to continue in this loveless marriage or opt out. Working and living in a different city will even make it easier for me.
I needed to let my thoughts out and thanks to Nairaland, I have done so.
go do DNA test for the baby first.our people said that" them no dey tell a deaf person say war don't start" |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by Fuckyoumod: 9:04am On May 25, 2023 |
MrNipplesLover:
Story...
When the time is right, u mumu guys go get sense...
I am yet to be convinced by anyone wetin dey inside this marriage una dey put hands in that is beneficial...
I'm yet to be convinced...
The only thing is that u simps dey always come out and wail like say dem force una...
I liked your quote because you made rare sense. So many men are dying for nothing....their only mission is to please and please wife. They hardly take care of themselves. This life, shey God gave it to men to serve marriage and wife all through their life time? The annoying part is some wives don't even appreciate their husbands. Mehnn.... So many men are suffering from self induced BP, all in the name of Marriage. Spits! 3 Likes |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by rezky(m): 9:28am On May 25, 2023 |
CuriousMind2022:
It's a known fact that most Nigerian girls marry who they consider ready for marriage and not necessarily who they love. I am exactly in that dilemma and the question I am asking myself is whether I should continue in this loveless marriage or slowly drift and walk away.
My marriage is barely 2 years and a few months, but it has been a rough journey for me. Things I never envisaged I would experience in my marriage, I have suffered, from utmost disrespect to verbal abuse.
I came to the conclusion that she doesn't love or care about me based on what happened yesterday. I was recently transferred from my base to a new location and because of that, I would only be able to visit weekends or twice a month. Prior to that, we barely had sex once a week.
We had already had sex the normal once we usually had it (Saturday morning), but I wanted more because I will only be coming back after two weeks. I initiated a move on Sunday morning, she declined because she was thinking of preparing food for our baby before we leave for church. We went to church and came back, and as usual, my wife was in her undies (just panties and bra) in the sitting room (This was what she wore throughout that Sunday).
I watched her walk around the house in that and that even turned me on the more. I am a practicing Christian, and I try not to look after other women lustfully, but common this is my wife, even God sanctions that. After being turned on throughout the day, I went to my wife in the night, (note she slept in the sitting room with our baby leaving me alone in the room) to enjoy my conjugal rights with her, but she gave me excuses that she is upset and not in the mood.
I left and went back, seriously konjified, I managed to sleep. The next morning, I woke up with my urges and went to the sitting room to have my morning devotion, but I could barely concentrate because I was still very Hot. I explained to her that so really wants me to go to my new station like this knowing fully well I will not be coming back until 2 weeks time. This woman did not care!
I took my bath, prepared myself, and set out for my office. I was not happy with her but I kept my cool and left for work. She had demanded that I dropped some money for her before leaving and despite the fact that I was not happy with her, I dropped the money in a conspicuous place where I know she will see it before leaving. This was my own way of saying I am not happy with what you did, but I still cared.
I try to do things I usually do for my wife even when I am angry with her. This is my own way of saying I may be angry with you, but I still cared about you and I am open to a resolution. On the other hand, my wife doesn't care what happens to me when she is upset. She immediately stops cooking for me ad any other thing she does for me when she is upset. It is obvious to me now that to my wife I don't really matter in the grand scheme of things. She is only caring and concerned, when she is not angry (when we are good and we don't have any issues). I believe that when you love somebody, you treat them right and show genuine love and care for them even when you're upset with them. This is what I have constantly shown to my wife in our 2+ years of marriage.
Back to my story of what happened weekend/Monday. My wife never bothered to call me to check if I arrived safely since I left the house yesterday. I even called her once (primarily to check on my daughter), but she didn't pick up and she didn't call back, and up till now, we have not spoken.
She obviously does not care whether I arrived safely in my station or not. In this country of insecurities, a family member of yours will travel and you do not care whether he/she arrived safely, that is the height for me, and in the actual sense, I should be the one upset here because she left me high and dry, despite knowing fully well I am very Hot.
I am a family-oriented person, I have always dreamt of having a peaceful, loving, and Godly home but unfortunately, the reverse is the case for my wife. I began to understand why family background is very important in a person's life, after getting married. My wife is from a family where they place little or no value on marriage. Her mother had children with 2 men, and my wife is obviously working very hard to follow that same path. She shows little or no enthusiasm in making our marriage work. I am always the one to initiate moves to resolve issues when we quarrel, whether I am right or wrong, I do not care, my focus is just on making my marriage work and my home peaceful.
This last episode shook me very hard, and I have been asking myself whether I want to continue in this loveless marriage or opt out. Working and living in a different city will even make it easier for me.
I needed to let my thoughts out and thanks to Nairaland, I have done so.
No need to dey think am... Just get place at your current work location and have your peace of mind. She's not ready for Marriage... |
| Re: I do not feel loved by my wife, Is this enough reason to quit my marriage? by boxypane(m): 9:32am On May 25, 2023 |
nedekid:
Yes, are you? Yes I am. With two wonderful kids that only my wife can't handle. |
