Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Zonefree(m): 8:34pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Nemesis0147: that lady really shock me too Unlike her 😂 Aswear. I had to check if it's a cloned account. ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) 2 Likes |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by bigiyaro(m): 8:34pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
This is the beginning of the end. |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Dennisochampa: 8:34pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Procashtips:
Seems I'm talking to a wall. Can't you think differently?
You keep repeating the same line.
How did you know he actually beat her?
Because she said so?
What if it was a lie? .... OK, let's do this.... I believe her because I've seen men who do such and until it's proven a lie, then I retain my judgment.... U can believe what you want... It's a free world!!! 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Kobojunkie: 8:34pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
royalfly: ■ U seem to av the vocals to argue don't make u right, u trying to narrow ur take but I have a bigger picture.. " comprehend" Read this as it more than explains why you think all humans are implicated in the particular delusions you are hooked to. An individual with low SI often displays unsociable behavior, making other people feel frustrated, inadequate, and devalued. Often, a low SI person is not intentionally unsociable. Their behavior is often due to a lack of social awareness and understanding of how their behavior affects other people. https://www.healthhub.sg/live-healthy/584/mental_health_social_intelligence |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by shantti(m): 8:35pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Dennisochampa: .... Does the woman sound like someone who wants to make her husband suffer? Why don't you see it this way... If indeed what she said is the right thing, then is her actions right or wrong? I am basing my judgment based on the assumption that what the woman has said is the right thing. If it happens that it's not, then I stand to be corrected when the truth comes out If what she said is true, divorce would have been the best option and not an arrest. That man no go forgive am. Since she wasnt beaten to death as she was alive to facilitate an arrest, she should have facilitated a divorce, simply or call her brothers to beat him. It is only kids and single ladies that are arguing about the dynamics of the correctness of her decision, they think reality is hollywood |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by UnfairLife7(m): 8:35pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Nemesis0147: you see your life? So you have not been reading the news were wives stabs their husbands to death? Mtchew compare the stat to that of men. Compare the stat of men rapist to that of women. What of robbery, cyber fraud, pick pocket, hooliganism? Dominic violence is a No |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by SonofGod231: 8:36pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
UnfairLife7: if you like beat your wife, you will sleep in cell for days. If your wife is too naive to stand for herself your neighbours will do that for her free of charge ![shocked](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/shocked.gif) |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by LilMissFavvy(f): 8:36pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Well spoken. I am surprised that people are saying she has lost her husband, my question is, what is good about a man who lacks money, character, and also beats his wife? As long as OP continues to pamper that man, he will continue to do worse. If she was the type of woman who starves him of food and nags* daily about his joblessness, he wouldn't try that nonsense*. emmeyen: For every man that decided to attack a scared woman who probably did the only thing she thought was right after being beaten and humiliated by a drunk man, you people are simply mad! As in raving mad! May the likes of OP's husband befall your siblings or daughters. If you don't have money as a man, have good character. You cannot lack both and be shouting bruised ego. God punish that ego that will make you raise your hand on an hardworking woman who decided to take up the responsibilities of the home. And it's because she is doing it well, that's why he has the guts to go and drink. Nobody is advising that woman to run from the monster her husband has become till he is back to his senses. The he-goats are busy claiming she denied him sex. When he comes back smelling like a hippo after drinking, what is she supposed to do? Take her bath and lie down for him to climb?
Madam! Do you have male relatives? Put them in the know of who your husband has become, let them come and warn him not to raise his hands on you again. And be on the look out, if he doesn't change, biko carry your things and leave before he kills you and start blaming the devil. Stop feeling guilty. Else he will capitalise on that guilt and bring more drama. If he has ego, he should go and work! even if na to carry blocks for head. Real men work to provide for their family. Not going about sulking and beating their wives. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by A40(m): 8:36pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Emotionss: [color=#006600][/color]
In the eyes of the law and feminism you are right to have looked your jobless,broke and depressed husband but in the eyes of culture and religion you are extremely wrong....
Your husband is depressed, ashamed and angry with himself and life for his inability to get a job and provide for his family.
And instead of encouragement, understanding and patience, you decided to lock him up for two days as a result of his depressed outrage.
Did you report him to the family elders ?
Did you report to your pastor or any family members or family friends ?
You could have used the police to threatened him but instead you went for outright arrest.
There are more effective ways to handle such situations but I believe you wanted to prove your superiority over your husband as the Bread winner of the house. I am 100% sure your female friends suggested and encouraged you to go to such extreme....
One thing I can assure is that by locking him up in the worst stage of his life, you have succeeded in destroying your home and marriage. That man will never forgive such inhumane and disgraced treatment from his wife....
If her father was Commissioner of Police would he put a finger on her. Let's not defend nonsense please. In many countries he would be locked up so forget all these family elders, pastors talk. I'm a man and the truth is a lot of us need to do better. Can't be unemployed, drinking and still beating your wife join. She's not responsible for your misfortune 1 Like |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by KingLennon(m): 8:37pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Samantha124: So you would edure being abused by your wife? She's my wife for crying out loud samantha. What so many couples see in marriages and file for a divorce, is what others see and just laugh over it.... |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Procashtips(m): 8:38pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Dennisochampa: .... OK, let's do this.... I believe her because I've seen men who do such and until it's proven a lie, then I retain my judgment.... U can believe what you want... It's a free world!!! Then why do you keep quoting me since you are still using assumption to judge? People that use assumptions to judge cases are very foolish because i have seen such before until proven that their assumption was true. It's a free world, just believe your assumption. In the end, na she go still carry her cross and be in a loveless marriage if there's any left. |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Gbolahan111: 8:38pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Verokeena: Good afternoon Nl family Please pardon my epistle
My husband lost his job two years ago and ever since he has been so reluctant on getting another.. not to brag but I can say I have been the one keeping the family going ever since the job incidence (not like I ever complained) .
What I noticed about him is he now drinks and smokes and he is always hissing (obviously he is not happy and I try to always console him just to elate his Spirit)
Fast forward to last two months.. I got back from work and I was very tired.. I had to go pick the kids from school , bathe them, feed them and to make matters worst I wasn't feeling too alright .. (when I got home he (my husband) wasn't at home)
When I was done with the kids and fixing the house I was so tired I thought to myself to take a lil nap that was how I slept off (and this was around 9pm) ..
He got back around 10pm obviously drunk and smelling like a skunk.. he went straight to the kitchen. That was how the whole problem started.. first was insult.. then my phone, smashed it on the ground later my clothes he started tearing them .. saying all those things he was destroying was why I was feeling untouchable that he knows I have male friends sleeping with me..
I tried securing my items so he doesn't destroy more things that was how he pounced on me..
The next day I got him arrested he spent two days there.. but now I feel so guilty... He doesn't talk to me anymore.. I have apologized times without number
I don't just know what to do...
Nb: even while he was there I was still taking food to him I’m surprised no one is commenting on his drinking habits. Where is he getting the money from? As for the police station matter, you should have left the house together with your kids instead of spending money at the station. Please you need to work on your anger. Kindly be patient with your husband. Talk to him everyday and show him more love and care. Then if he doesn’t stop his ugly drinking habit and you sense that your life is in danger, because of your safety, be wise to give him a distance. |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Nobody: 8:38pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
If he broke her dishes and beat her up, then I'll be in full support of what she did because I wouldn't tolerate a man treating me that way. Nemesis0147: how will you see your sister in-law after locking up her husband….your brother. How will your family see her?
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Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by SonofGod231: 8:38pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
LadyRosa:
Lol! Don't feel sorry for him. He doesn’t know a low life first class son of a rotten C.unt like you exists! ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png) So sad but I'm really inspired to meet him. I just want to know how he managed to carry cervical cancer home?😁 |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by royalfly(m): 8:39pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Kobojunkie: Read this as it more than explains why you think all humans are implicated in the particular delusions you are hooked to. https://www.healthhub.sg/live-healthy/584/mental_health_social_intelligence Wow, now I see u are textbook av u gotten a post masters degree.? That write up is relative. I scanned through and all o say is social intelligence is not about agreeing and getting along even if it's inclusive, u av to know the side to go despite u getting along |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Bennysam: 8:39pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Verokeena: Good afternoon Nl family Please pardon my epistle
My husband lost his job two years ago and ever since he has been so reluctant on getting another.. not to brag but I can say I have been the one keeping the family going ever since the job incidence (not like I ever complained) .
What I noticed about him is he now drinks and smokes and he is always hissing (obviously he is not happy and I try to always console him just to elate his Spirit)
Fast forward to last two months.. I got back from work and I was very tired.. I had to go pick the kids from school , bathe them, feed them and to make matters worst I wasn't feeling too alright .. (when I got home he (my husband) wasn't at home)
When I was done with the kids and fixing the house I was so tired I thought to myself to take a lil nap that was how I slept off (and this was around 9pm) ..
He got back around 10pm obviously drunk and smelling like a skunk.. he went straight to the kitchen. That was how the whole problem started.. first was insult.. then my phone, smashed it on the ground later my clothes he started tearing them .. saying all those things he was destroying was why I was feeling untouchable that he knows I have male friends sleeping with me..
I tried securing my items so he doesn't destroy more things that was how he pounced on me..
The next day I got him arrested he spent two days there.. but now I feel so guilty... He doesn't talk to me anymore.. I have apologized times without number
I don't just know what to do...
Nb: even while he was there I was still taking food to him You're very lucky I'm not your husband because by now you will be writing this epistle from your grave , idiot |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by LadyRosa(f): 8:40pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
SonofGod231:
So sad but I'm inspired to meet him. I just want to know how he managed to carry cervical cancer home.😁 Well! Is that the sickness your mama died from? I guess she talks the way she 4"cks!!! ![cheesy](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/cheesy.png) |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by BennyDGreat: 8:40pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Kobojunkie: Again, Stop fooling yourself! The moment you tailor the counseling to suit your religious/traditional idea, it ceases to be professional and becomes religious hogwash! ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png)
I bet your kind would not be happy if you found yourself sitting down to be counseled by a so-called professional who had no problems introducing ideas from his own religion — say Islam or traditional beliefs— into each session. But here you pretend it is all good to do so if the so-called professional claimed to be of Christian leanings. Nonsense! ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) You don't know anything about counselling and you are arguing on a mountain of assumption. One of a characteristic of a wise person is ability to learn and take corrections. Also tone down on how you throw vulgar words around. Engage smartly boy 1 Like |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Nobody: 8:41pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Okay, if you're comfortable with being in an abusive marriage, then that's your choice. But it's clear the op isn't comfortable, so you mustn't try to project your beliefs about marriage on her. KingLennon:
She's my wife for crying out loud samantha. What so many couples see in marriages and file for a divorce, is what others see and just laugh over it.... 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Ikpunnegi01: 8:42pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
You called police to arrest and lock up your husband, it is finished! Forget about the marriage, peace is gone! |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Kobojunkie: 8:42pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Gbolahan111: ■ I’m surprised no one is commenting on his drinking habits. Where is he getting the money from? As for the police station matter, you should have left the house together with your kids instead of spending money at the station. ■ Please you need to work on your anger. Kindly be patient with your husband. Talk to him everyday and show him more love and care. ■Then if he doesn’t stop his ugly drinking habit and you sense that your life is in danger, because of your safety, be wise to give him a distance. Her anger is to blame for the man destroying property and turning her into a punching bag. Does she have no right to be angry? ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) She should talk to him every day because she don become mental health counselor abi? Show him love and care when he chose to violently attack her in the presence of her kids? ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) 3. He is still jobless so why are you pretending he will change overnight if she cuddles him even more than she has for the past 2 years? ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by BennyDGreat: 8:42pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Samantha124: But it is life threatening, what if he killed her in the process of beating her up? She must have escaped to be able to report to the police. So, he obviously didn't kill her in the process of beating her up. She didn't act with a clear mind. No one from her family with support her for taking the arrest option. |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Nemesis0147(m): 8:43pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
UnfairLife7: compare the stat to that of men. Compare the stat of men rapist to that of women. What of robbery, cyber fraud, pick pocket, hooliganism?
Dominic violence is a No you are comparing the stats of what you see online. What of those that didn’t make it to the cyberspace? What of the men that were forcefully accused? Domestic violence is a no But u didn’t answer my question….can you lock up your wife? |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Bennysam: 8:43pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Verokeena:
It was more of a warning to him.. I didn't neglect him there.. he had access to his phone.. even though as first he wasn't taking my call but I kept texting him..
Now the thing is he was supposed to come out the next day but he refused. Said since I placed him there he'd wish to die there(emotional blackmail if you ask me)
I had to go with his friends to beg him the next day.. Hahaha your gut is what makes me wonder the kind of woman you're or the kind of wife you're to him |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by armyofone(m): 8:44pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Verokeena: Good afternoon Nl family Please pardon my epistle
My husband lost his job two years ago and ever since he has been so reluctant on getting another.. not to brag but I can say I have been the one keeping the family going ever since the job incidence (not like I ever complained) .
What I noticed about him is he now drinks and smokes and he is always hissing (obviously he is not happy and I try to always console him just to elate his Spirit)
Fast forward to last two months.. I got back from work and I was very tired.. I had to go pick the kids from school , bathe them, feed them and to make matters worst I wasn't feeling too alright .. (when I got home he (my husband) wasn't at home)
When I was done with the kids and fixing the house I was so tired I thought to myself to take a lil nap that was how I slept off (and this was around 9pm) ..
He got back around 10pm obviously drunk and smelling like a skunk.. he went straight to the kitchen. That was how the whole problem started.. first was insult.. then my phone, smashed it on the ground later my clothes he started tearing them .. saying all those things he was destroying was why I was feeling untouchable that he knows I have male friends sleeping with me..
I tried securing my items so he doesn't destroy more things that was how he pounced on me..
The next day I got him arrested he spent two days there.. but now I feel so guilty... He doesn't talk to me anymore.. I have apologized times without number
I don't just know what to do...
Nb: even while he was there I was still taking food to him Don't feel guilty. Imagine if he had used the object used in destroying your clothes on you! I don't see or know why you are still there with him when you are the father and mother of your children already. 1 Like |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by sageb: 8:44pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
thesicilian: A man can feed his family for years and no one will hear about it. He's often proud to bear the responsibility. But the moment a woman starts bearing the responsibility, all hell must break loose, sooner or later The sad reality 1 Like |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Nemesis0147(m): 8:44pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Samantha124: If he broke her dishes and beat her up, then I'll be in full support of what she did because I wouldn't tolerate a man treating me that way. how will you feel if your father locks up your mother for whatever reason? |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by SonofGod231: 8:45pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
LadyRosa:
Well! Is that the sickness your mama died from? I guess she talks the way she 4"cks!!! ![cheesy](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/cheesy.png) You must be an extremely uggggh biiiiich,i'm tayad of your bullshiit. Abeg,buzzzzzzzzzzz offf |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by OZIOGU1: 8:45pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Persephone1: May we not marry a boy man
Dear Op, my people have an adage it is: Aiki lo kabo ile ejo , ka tun sore. It means we don't come back from court to become friends. Arresting your husband may be right or wrong but what happens when he is released? If you were arrested as a wife, will you be happy with your husband and let everything go back to normal when you are released? Especially in this part of the world.
If you still want a happy marriage after a dispute, police station should not be an option. In the sight of the law, you are right but culturally you are not.
Get elders to speak to him, I hope he listens. May God help you. This matter deep i can't think straight self ![cheesy](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/cheesy.png) My dear , I don't support domestic violence, but her actions is oppression .she no go explain too much, evidence dey against her One more thing she forgets to mention here is that, the likelyhood that she must have turn the children against the man, telling them how useless Thier father is, no one is looking towards this direction. May God help men, A man can take care of a woman for 100yrs and be proud and no one will hear, but a woman taking care of a man for 1hour, you go worship that woman. It's sad for men who are going through depression and my heart is with them. Finally for me, no woman will get me arrested for what ever offence and remain my wife...is just a matter of time, this woman will kill that man if God doesn't bless him with job quickly. Your submission is classic, I agree with you. |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by UnfairLife7(m): 8:45pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Bennysam:
You're very lucky I'm not your husband because by now you will be writing this epistle from your grave , idiot you go chop watery beans tire for kirikiri maximum prison. Na people like you plenty for there sha. |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Bennysam: 8:46pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
Kobojunkie: So why exactly do you feel guilty for having him arrested for 2 days? Would this all had gone better if he had taken to smashing your head after smashing everything else? ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png)
Now that you are obviously aware the man has taken to acting out violently, don't you think it makes sense at this point to distance yourself and your kids from him instead of worrying whether he is in speaking terms and if he has eaten or not? Please, separate yourself from that man asap. The space might do him a whole hell of good.. ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) So you think the best thing to do to a man going through hard time is for his wife to leave him? What a terrible person you're |
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by LadyRosa(f): 8:47pm On Aug 22, 2023 |
SonofGod231:
You must be an extremely uggggh biiiiich,i'm tayad of your bullshiit. Abeg,buzzzzzzzzzzz You describe her too well! Your mother. No wonder having crawled out from her putrid hole, you sleep and wake up with horrifying nightmares! 4ck you! 4c'k her too! ![undecided](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/undecided.png) Next time you see this moniker, just dey face front...You no reach! |