izonborn098:
What do you mean by unserious class mates, see this one so you're doing competition with them, right? Madam life is all about connection and hard work, some people make it without much stress because they've the needed connection or faster thinking especially with the invention of technology. I don't know why you only focus in the virginity aspect, you can be a good and decent woman and still end up with the wrong man, it's life.

To divorce is not that easy as singles here put it everytime, but at the same time i think there's something that man is not telling you, beside you know what's good for ur mental health so don't risk your life to save any marriage..

preshpraiz:
It's 2.47 am here but I can't sleep, I hardly sleep these days.

My whole world is crumbling.
I have been a regular guest here for awhile now but had to register this morning, I need somewhere to pour out my heart, somewhere to dump my frustrations.

I came from a good, not so rich home but my parents were so hardworking.I had a good moral upbringing, went to tertiary institution and graduated with good grades.

While in school, I never had a boy friend though I had a lot of "chykers", never went clubbing, didn't socialize much.

Few months to the end of my NYSC, I met my husband. We got talking and boom, I fell in love with him. He is my ideal man....he doesn't drink nor smoke, gentle and soft spoken.

He wasn't earning much but it didn't bother me. I believe in working hard and growing with my man.

Now my regrets...
* The "angel" I married has refused to get a job after losing the last one during COVID 19.

He said he can never work in a private company again. His target is multinationals.

I encouraged him to pick up a job with private company while hoping for a bigger fish at least to support in taking care of the needs at home but he said no.

I'm left with taking care of our 3 kids, feeding, school fees and virtually every need at home. All he does is press phone, gamble and sleep.

Now our rent is due, no money.
I married as a virgin, married for love and not money, work my ass off, doing so many side hustle to shoulder the expenses at home. I'm tired. I regret all these.

When I see my "unserious" classmates on social media and sometimes offline, I weep. See them living large. I thought all the sacrifices I made way back will pay off now.
I have made up my mind that if he doesn't fix the rent, I will move back to my parent's house.

Kindly feel free to advise or bash me. Tankio

Reminderz:

he might have been facing a lot of pressure of getting cash, you know how the economy is now... he might be frustrated, this is why he resorted to gambling, but unfortunately, it's like going from frying pan to fire... gambling will crush him totally, he should take up available work for now while aiming bigger, not just sitting idle doing nothing hoping for a bigger contract, he must get working... but trust, no man will ever feel happy not being able to provide for his family, you might never know what he's going through or planning secretly... life is not even easy for the singles let alone the married ones, so please cut him some slack... talk to him, and you guys can discuss how money can be made, and I hope he really listens.. but one quick question, was there any red flags you noticed when you were dating?

and secondly, life is not a bed of roses, you have to get off the fantasy of happily ever after, there's nothing like that... there will be challenges you'll face in life... you just have to fight through it... yes, you might love him, but love is not what hold marriages, it's commitment... even the couples you admire online, have their own worst stages which they will never talk about but since they keep feeding you guys with fantasies, y'll believe that's what marriage is all about... if you base your marriage only on love, it will fail..

thirdly, why re you comparing your situation with others? do you know the kind of environment and connections they have? do you know if they had help? do you know what they did to get to where they are? why are you putting unnecessary pressure unto yourself because you wanna impress? see ehn, there's so much pains and struggles people hide from the world, we only share the good part of it on media, this is why social media is a place of lies, where hypocrites relate with each other... face your own struggles, be your own competition...

you married as a virgin as you should, but life doesn't end there... someone can be good but still experience some bad things, that's life for you... there are some circumstances that will be beyond your control, and you just have to live through it, this is a phase everyone will pass through whether you're good or bad... the only thing is that, your experiences shouldn't make you stumble but makes you stronger...

atobs4real:
Who virginity help?
Well, maybe it helped u get all your needs and long life.
Life is more than virginity

preshpraiz:
It's 2.47 am here but I can't sleep, I hardly sleep these days.

My whole world is crumbling.
I have been a regular guest here for awhile now but had to register this morning, I need somewhere to pour out my heart, somewhere to dump my frustrations.

I came from a good, not so rich home but my parents were so hardworking.I had a good moral upbringing, went to tertiary institution and graduated with good grades.

While in school, I never had a boy friend though I had a lot of "chykers", never went clubbing, didn't socialize much.

Few months to the end of my NYSC, I met my husband. We got talking and boom, I fell in love with him. He is my ideal man....he doesn't drink nor smoke, gentle and soft spoken.

He wasn't earning much but it didn't bother me. I believe in working hard and growing with my man.

Now my regrets...
* The "angel" I married has refused to get a job after losing the last one during COVID 19.

He said he can never work in a private company again. His target is multinationals.

I encouraged him to pick up a job with private company while hoping for a bigger fish at least to support in taking care of the needs at home but he said no.

I'm left with taking care of our 3 kids, feeding, school fees and virtually every need at home. All he does is press phone, gamble and sleep.

Now our rent is due, no money.
I married as a virgin, married for love and not money, work my ass off, doing so many side hustle to shoulder the expenses at home. I'm tired. I regret all these.

When I see my "unserious" classmates on social media and sometimes offline, I weep. See them living large. I thought all the sacrifices I made way back will pay off now.
I have made up my mind that if he doesn't fix the rent, I will move back to my parent's house.

Kindly feel free to advise or bash me. Tankio

preshpraiz:
It's 2.47 am here but I can't sleep, I hardly sleep these days.

My whole world is crumbling.
I have been a regular guest here for awhile now but had to register this morning, I need somewhere to pour out my heart, somewhere to dump my frustrations.

I came from a good, not so rich home but my parents were so hardworking.I had a good moral upbringing, went to tertiary institution and graduated with good grades.

While in school, I never had a boy friend though I had a lot of "chykers", never went clubbing, didn't socialize much.

Few months to the end of my NYSC, I met my husband. We got talking and boom, I fell in love with him. He is my ideal man....he doesn't drink nor smoke, gentle and soft spoken.

He wasn't earning much but it didn't bother me. I believe in working hard and growing with my man.

Now my regrets...
* The "angel" I married has refused to get a job after losing the last one during COVID 19.

He said he can never work in a private company again. His target is multinationals.

I encouraged him to pick up a job with private company while hoping for a bigger fish at least to support in taking care of the needs at home but he said no.

I'm left with taking care of our 3 kids, feeding, school fees and virtually every need at home. All he does is press phone, gamble and sleep.

Now our rent is due, no money.
I married as a virgin, married for love and not money, work my ass off, doing so many side hustle to shoulder the expenses at home. I'm tired. I regret all these.

When I see my "unserious" classmates on social media and sometimes offline, I weep. See them living large. I thought all the sacrifices I made way back will pay off now.
I have made up my mind that if he doesn't fix the rent, I will move back to my parent's house.

Kindly feel free to advise or bash me. Tankio

Kemadealadire:

Undiluted love since 2020, if you were the one in her shoes, I am sure you won't give yourself this advice, talk is cheap.

The least the man should have done is get something to earn from while he still continues to apply to the multinationals.

He hasn't been earning since 2020 with a family and 3children, women are naturally not providers, they are to assist and care.

socialmediaman:
Madam be a better woman.

When you wake up everyday, give God glory and adoration for giving you good health, a job and beautiful children that you are proud to take care of.

Thank God for having a man who can help you take care of the children while you go out and work, and when he helps you take care of the children, thank him for his help.

If you don’t like this style, there’s also another choice, start nagging him everyday till you nag him to self exile, then you can comfortably take care of your children and work at the same time while at it

olabrinks:
sometimes separation is needed. It’s the wake up call that some men need. Doing the same thing and expecting different results is madness. Men react more to actions than nagging.

Op please try to separate and go back to your parents. It doesn’t mean you’re divorcing but you need space.

madone:
This matter is going to be long where are the elders

preshpraiz:
It's 2.47 am here but I can't sleep, I hardly sleep these days.

My whole world is crumbling.
I have been a regular guest here for awhile now but had to register this morning, I need somewhere to pour out my heart, somewhere to dump my frustrations.

I came from a good, not so rich home but my parents were so hardworking.I had a good moral upbringing, went to tertiary institution and graduated with good grades.

While in school, I never had a boy friend though I had a lot of "chykers", never went clubbing, didn't socialize much.

Few months to the end of my NYSC, I met my husband. We got talking and boom, I fell in love with him. He is my ideal man....he doesn't drink nor smoke, gentle and soft spoken.

He wasn't earning much but it didn't bother me. I believe in working hard and growing with my man.

Now my regrets...
* The "angel" I married has refused to get a job after losing the last one during COVID 19.

He said he can never work in a private company again. His target is multinationals.

I encouraged him to pick up a job with private company while hoping for a bigger fish at least to support in taking care of the needs at home but he said no.

I'm left with taking care of our 3 kids, feeding, school fees and virtually every need at home. All he does is press phone, gamble and sleep.

Now our rent is due, no money.
I married as a virgin, married for love and not money, work my ass off, doing so many side hustle to shoulder the expenses at home. I'm tired. I regret all these.

When I see my "unserious" classmates on social media and sometimes offline, I weep. See them living large. I thought all the sacrifices I made way back will pay off now.
I have made up my mind that if he doesn't fix the rent, I will move back to my parent's house.

Kindly feel free to advise or bash me. Tankio

aameyah:


That is life (and men) for you.
When you saw that he was exhibiting these behaviours, first action would have been to halt childbearing (so that your load will be lighter). As it is now, don't make that mistake of a 4th child (because I know such a man will be running around with erect missile, because there is no other work to do than to be offloading surplus akamu).

Then again, stop covering up for him. Stop it at once. Again, do not cover up for him. Do what you can for yourself and children, but he is not your responsibility. Let him keep looking for multinational.

I was like you (good girl and a virgin). But I discovered people like us become preys in the hands of the ones who know how to choose their naiive victims. I was in the midst of money but I was deprived. Looking older, with tears as food and insulted and oppressed by inlaws.

My life turned around when I detached emotionally. I started taking decisions that would favour my life, rather than constraining my life to a guy who doesnt love, or cherish or protect me.

It would do you good to be logical and selfish with that gender that betrays. How many of these men truly love and respect us? They only want women for the social relevance that comes with being married, free labour like clean house, cooked food, washed cloths and free nurse for their parents, free sex and free womb to perpetuate their lineages. The day you women tell yourselves the truth is the day you are set free.

These nigs don't give a fvc and why should you?

sonofthunder:



So what's the connection between virginity and your current predicament? Or you are in search of a pity party to encourage you to go and cheat?

Typically, when we have a problem, we need the best solution and not the best solution we can come up with.


Moving back to your parents is not a bad solution but do you think there could be better solutions you need to explore?

Mindlog:


I am making efforts to wrap my mind around a wife who has become the sole provider in the home, goes out to work and comes back home to thank the husband and biological father of their children for being "humble" enough to "emasculate" himself to look after his own children when his wife is out at work?

Child care is the responsibility of BOTH father and mother.

preshpraiz:
It's 2.47 am here but I can't sleep, I hardly sleep these days.

My whole world is crumbling.
I have been a regular guest here for awhile now but had to register this morning, I need somewhere to pour out my heart, somewhere to dump my frustrations.

I came from a good, not so rich home but my parents were so hardworking.I had a good moral upbringing, went to tertiary institution and graduated with good grades.

While in school, I never had a boy friend though I had a lot of "chykers", never went clubbing, didn't socialize much.

Few months to the end of my NYSC, I met my husband. We got talking and boom, I fell in love with him. He is my ideal man....he doesn't drink nor smoke, gentle and soft spoken.

He wasn't earning much but it didn't bother me. I believe in working hard and growing with my man.

Now my regrets...
* The "angel" I married has refused to get a job after losing the last one during COVID 19.

He said he can never work in a private company again. His target is multinationals.

I encouraged him to pick up a job with private company while hoping for a bigger fish at least to support in taking care of the needs at home but he said no.

I'm left with taking care of our 3 kids, feeding, school fees and virtually every need at home. All he does is press phone, gamble and sleep.

Now our rent is due, no money.
I married as a virgin, married for love and not money, work my ass off, doing so many side hustle to shoulder the expenses at home. I'm tired. I regret all these.

When I see my "unserious" classmates on social media and sometimes offline, I weep. See them living large. I thought all the sacrifices I made way back will pay off now.
I have made up my mind that if he doesn't fix the rent, I will move back to my parent's house.

Kindly feel free to advise or bash me. Tankio

PhillipPHD:
Just dey play. Wake up call my foot! You don’t understand men one bit.

You move out and he’s happy that the nagging and burden is lifted. He gets a good job, accuse you of abandonment and start carrying other women. Who lose? Just dey play.

preshpraiz:
It's 2.47 am here but I can't sleep, I hardly sleep these days.

My whole world is crumbling.
I have been a regular guest here for awhile now but had to register this morning, I need somewhere to pour out my heart, somewhere to dump my frustrations.

I came from a good, not so rich home but my parents were so hardworking.I had a good moral upbringing, went to tertiary institution and graduated with good grades.

While in school, I never had a boy friend though I had a lot of "chykers", never went clubbing, didn't socialize much.

Few months to the end of my NYSC, I met my husband. We got talking and boom, I fell in love with him. He is my ideal man....he doesn't drink nor smoke, gentle and soft spoken.

He wasn't earning much but it didn't bother me. I believe in working hard and growing with my man.

Now my regrets...
* The "angel" I married has refused to get a job after losing the last one during COVID 19.

He said he can never work in a private company again. His target is multinationals.

I encouraged him to pick up a job with private company while hoping for a bigger fish at least to support in taking care of the needs at home but he said no.

I'm left with taking care of our 3 kids, feeding, school fees and virtually every need at home. All he does is press phone, gamble and sleep.

Now our rent is due, no money.
I married as a virgin, married for love and not money, work my ass off, doing so many side hustle to shoulder the expenses at home. I'm tired. I regret all these.

When I see my "unserious" classmates on social media and sometimes offline, I weep. See them living large. I thought all the sacrifices I made way back will pay off now.
I have made up my mind that if he doesn't fix the rent, I will move back to my parent's house.

Kindly feel free to advise or bash me. Tankio

descarado:
Go and look for something to do with your life. Time wasted on frivolities will never be regained.
How much is seun paying you and the likes of you for creating topics?