I seriously need advice as I really don't know what the right or best thing to do at this time. Please elders in the house be kind enough to suggest what I could do.

I did not think something like this can still happen in this era but this is what I have to deal with. So my mum flat out told me she does not like the girl I took home because she is not fine. About 3years ago when we went home together she told me this but I just disregarded it like when I'm ready she won't have a choice but to accept her as she is. To be honest she is not fine at all but she gives me peace of mind which I feel is the ultimate.

She was involved in an accident with my dad last year and we lost my dad in the process. During the burial I went home with my babe again and my mum still made her displeasure with the girl show.

The thing now is that I went home again to see how she is doing and she called to speak me again after stating that I had disobeyed her by not breaking up with the girl she said is still not having her and if I insist she is the one I should count her out of the marriage. She can never come visiting or even call her. She will not attend the wedding. Now I am 32 and she is 30

How do I navigate this situation. I plead for good advice. Have you been in a similar situation how did you handle it.

Lol funny but sad.

Your Mom reminds me of my Moms family that are particular about the beauty of a girl or handsomeness of a man you're bringing home. As in.. they will tell you this one you bring dudu nyanya come hope you're not planning to have something with him/her?
I'm talking about my grand aunties those days, which was why they selected a very handsome oyinbo looking husband for my Mom. Others who came were rejected until fine boy Lagos (my dad) now came. .

See she's your Mom and you need her consent and support in your marriage and if she says she doesn't like who you're bringing, let her go abi? This one you're claiming peace of mind, wait until you marry her. Let me tell you some girls can pretend just to enter especially if they know they are not so attractive but after they enter na that your mama she go first slap.

Abeg let her go. Prayerfully look for another girl and stop making it look like we wey fine na pain in the neck.. we too dey give peace of mind but if we do small shakara una go say we no give una peace. If woman no do shakara for her her husband who she go do am for?

Abeg leave her and let mama have her own peace of mind too. No be only you want peace of mind

Grow up and stop bringing your problems to social media it shows you are a weakling and not fit to be called an adult!! Handle your issues in privacy. Weakling

Your mom is shallow. Very shallow. Tell her to get you 'a beauty queen', before you break up with your ugly duckling.

CountinBlessins:
Grow up and stop bringing your problems to social media it shows you are a weakling and not fit to be called an adult!! Handle your issues in privacy. Weakling

Mind your business. Over Sabi na him make many dey die in silence.

Let him share whatever he likes, no be your brother and you can never know or meet him in real life. Haba!

sammymax:
I seriously need advice as I really don't know what the right or best thing to do at this time. Please elders in the house be kind enough to suggest what I could do.

I did not think something like this can still happen in this era but this is what I have to deal with. So my mum flat out told me she does not like the girl I took home because she is not fine. About 3years ago when we went home together she told me this but I just disregarded it like when I'm ready she won't have a choice but to accept her as she is. To be honest she is not fine at all but she gives me peace of mind which I feel is the ultimate.

She was involved in an accident with my dad last year and we lost my dad in the process. During the burial I went home with my babe again and my mum still made her displeasure with the girl show.

The thing now is that I went home again to see how she is doing and she called to speak me again after stating that I had disobeyed her by not breaking up with the girl she said is still not having her and if I insist she is the one I should count her out of the marriage. She can never come visiting or even call her. She will not attend the wedding. Now I am 32 and she is 30

How do I navigate this situation. I plead for good advice. Have you been in a similar situation how did you handle it.

This is how some mother's push their children to marry the wrong people.

If the girl is homely and has a good character then I will advise you shun your mum's threats.

Men have chased beauty and died in the process. Enough said.

CountinBlessins:
Grow up and stop bringing your problems to social media it shows you are a weakling and not fit to be called an adult!! Handle your issues in privacy. Weakling

You lack sense, he brought his issue to receive advise from people that have been in the same situation.

If you have no opinion to contribute, Shut the Fúck up.

Kajaard:


This is how some mother's push their children to marry the wrong people.

If the girl is homely and has a good character then I will advise you shun your mum's threats.

Men have chased beauty and died in the process. Enough said.

Abeg leave matter. Na every body get bad character. No body Holy pass. It is how you handle a person that will either bring out the angel or monster in him or her.

Be good yourself if you want to attract good.
Be peaceful if you want peace.
Be caring if you want to receive care and love.

Only a mad woman will bark at her man when he gives her what she likes. Every human being has got a good and bad side. You determine which one you get by your approach and attitude to them.

Kajaard:


Be quiet you this 46 year old everlasting spinster.

Old unmarried women like you always rejoice when you were people breaking up, getting divorced or relationships not working out becuase misery loves company.

Let this be the last time you ever mention me in a post ever again. Nairaland attention seeking nincompoop.

I know you're pained. Don't worry you'll have more cause to be

she stands on a ground because you were not man enough to confront her in her abstract mind, i chose my words, take note, i dont mean to disrespect her. as in when you are growing up, you need to shed childish behaviour year by year and have a stand all by yourself, in fact, you should have stern face 80% of time you are with parents, this will make them know the man inside of you, not everytime yes yes... when issue like this surface they will treat you like a child.

Anyways, my advice is, PRAY TO GOD FOR DIRECTION

Trigger warning ⚠️ unpopular opinion ‼️

Have you thought about your children and how they will look? If you’re not attractive then you’re setting your children up for future rejection. People have always looked for good genes to pass along to their offspring. Your mother definitely means well for you.

If you are very attractive then you could offset her lack but if you’re not then you are setting your children up for bullying and rejection of their own.

Another thing, it makes sense that she is peaceful because imagine if she was unattractive inside and out.

Bouncing2, please help him to plead with the mother, she is like me that deals with looks.

sammymax:
I seriously need advice as I really don't know what the right or best thing to do at this time. Please elders in the house be kind enough to suggest what I could do.

I did not think something like this can still happen in this era but this is what I have to deal with. So my mum flat out told me she does not like the girl I took home because she is not fine. About 3years ago when we went home together she told me this but I just disregarded it like when I'm ready she won't have a choice but to accept her as she is. To be honest she is not fine at all but she gives me peace of mind which I feel is the ultimate.

She was involved in an accident with my dad last year and we lost my dad in the process. During the burial I went home with my babe again and my mum still made her displeasure with the girl show.

The thing now is that I went home again to see how she is doing and she called to speak me again after stating that I had disobeyed her by not breaking up with the girl she said is still not having her and if I insist she is the one I should count her out of the marriage. She can never come visiting or even call her. She will not attend the wedding. Now I am 32 and she is 30

How do I navigate this situation. I plead for good advice. Have you been in a similar situation how did you handle it.

Listen to your mum.

from now, she should only be your cum bucket as you look for her replacement

sammymax:
I seriously need advice as I really don't know what the right or best thing to do at this time. Please elders in the house be kind enough to suggest what I could do.

I did not think something like this can still happen in this era but this is what I have to deal with. So my mum flat out told me she does not like the girl I took home because she is not fine. About 3years ago when we went home together she told me this but I just disregarded it like when I'm ready she won't have a choice but to accept her as she is. To be honest she is not fine at all but she gives me peace of mind which I feel is the ultimate.

She was involved in an accident with my dad last year and we lost my dad in the process. During the burial I went home with my babe again and my mum still made her displeasure with the girl show.

The thing now is that I went home again to see how she is doing and she called to speak me again after stating that I had disobeyed her by not breaking up with the girl she said is still not having her and if I insist she is the one I should count her out of the marriage. She can never come visiting or even call her. She will not attend the wedding. Now I am 32 and she is 30

How do I navigate this situation. I plead for good advice. Have you been in a similar situation how did you handle it.

Will your mum be the one to live with her or impregnate her?
Why would you allow your mom decide your life? If you know she'll give you peace . Stay with her.

Marriage is beyond beautiful girl o

Jewessgratitud3:


Abeg leave matter. Na every body get bad character. No body Holy pass. It is how you handle a person that will either bring out the angel or monster in him or her.

Be good yourself if you want to attract good.
Be peaceful if you want peace.
Be caring if you want to receive care and love.

Only a mad woman will bark at her man when he gives her what she likes. Every human being has got a good and bad side. You determine which one you get by your approach and attitude to them.

Opposites attract and bad people naturally go for good partners.

Lol. I don’t really think it has something to do with her not fine. Although that might contribute. There are people you don’t just like from first seeing or meeting them.

In fewer cases you might start liking them later.

Most of my friends Re people i met for the first time and we just flow and like each other.

If I don’t like you from the first seeing. No way we can be friends

I thought life should humble your mother if she's alive while her husband died in same car accident.? She is supposed to know that life is vanity and character is more important than beauty. Unfortunately your mom is still canal minded.

You have 3 options

1. Do a registry marriage with your woman, then upon your mother's death in future, you will then do a proper marriage.
2. Get a female distant relative to stand in place of your mother and go ahead with a wedding.
3. Cohabit with your woman without marriage.

The children looks is a stake here. Choose well o

You didn't mention any issues between you or anything wrong with her character, so leaving her simply because of a superficial reason like this, especially if you've been dating her for over 3-years (or how many years?) would not be nice. You can polish and beautify her on the outside to your taste.

CountinBlessins:
Grow up and stop bringing your problems to social media it shows you are a weakling and not fit to be called an adult!! Handle your issues in privacy. Weakling

Says who?

Stop joining people to say rubbish.

A lady got help here from anonymous and so many others alike.

What makes him a weakling?

.

all d beautiful people u see, tell dem remove wig, 10 pounds of paint on face n na mgbeke u go see . . remove clothes u go see plenty craw craw, marks for body . everytin na packaging . Package n manage ur own woman wey give u peace

I married without the initial consent of my parent. Took my friends, drove down to the registry and I was married and nobody knew in my family at the time.

I am the one marrying and not my parents. Ability to make difficult decisions is what makes you a man.

My mum reported me to my uncles and later at my church wedding, she dey do face, me i nor send even though, I love her and was the favorite child.

Kajaard:


Be quiet you this 46 year old everlasting spinster.

Old unmarried women like you always rejoice when you were people breaking up, getting divorced or relationships not working out becuase misery loves company.

Let this be the last time you ever mention me in a post ever again. Nairaland attention seeking nincompoop.

dat ugly old woman Jewessgratitud3 na used n overused evening newspaper . on her 10 other monikers she don deactivate she don sleep with men finish, na cum bucket she be buh she dey parade nl form holy pass everybody . Las las na to deactivate come open new moniker continue her scamming shenanigans for nl

There is more to marriage than just a beautiful face...

Talk to your mom and also pray about everything...

I sell jewelry packages ooo and I've prayed ooo come and buy ooo

Your mum wants you to marry pretty girl that might likely show you and her pepper later

Your mom is shallow sorry to say

A girl who is homely and gives you peace of mind, respects your family and your decision is the ultimate girl, you fit marry fine girl wey go dey beat your mama later

havilla:
You sef why do you want to marry an ugly woman with all the beautiful ladies around

If you are truly a female you'd know that no woman is ugly. You too are not beautiful in the eyes of everybody.😒

The girlfriend's appearance should not be a factor in whether or not she is suitable for you. There's more to marriage than beautiful face.
Na now wey the girl don reach 30 una wan come break up? Nah you must marry her