The shit he is taking from his in-laws, the wife will not take half of that from the man's family members.

papyjaypaul:


This one is not matter of fight, life is not fair to men but we need to know how to mange the female species. When I was younger, papa used to tell me about women, then I was clinging on to women because women will always be partial. As a man, I can now see what he said. You have to handle women in their game.

This people will not stay there forever but let me tell you one thing, the moment you say one thing, that is what they will never forget and remember you for. They will not remember all the free feeding he was doing.

Are you saying that my family is hungry

Are we bothering you

Okay i will use my money.

The thing can turn anyhow. Imagine the family now buying their things or the guy sending them out claiming tough guy. I have had guys who did that, they sent family away, it never ends well. In laws are like boardroom politics, let him manage them well. They know themselves better than he thinks he knows them. A man must draw boundaries but in drawing boundaries, he should remember he still needs them in the future. This is just the first pregnancy.

I get all you explained. But in life you don't have to always enslave yourself to others just because you are afraid of what they will say.

If his in-laws are equally afraid of what he will say or think about them, thay would have been at least considerate and use their conscience.

In situations like this, you consider a middle point where the action you take will not be too disastrous but still effective in solving the situation.

let the man invite his mother and siblings and see if the wife is going to take it for just one month.

What the Bleep does that picture have to do with the thread? These moderators wey go fishing instead of village classes. Mscheew. Oga, grit your teeth and endure. Na you choose to marry. You no know challenges follow for the matter? When the child reaches six months, chase your mother-in-law back home.

samwash:
Like the saying "To be a man is not a days' job"
This is one of the sacrifices of a responsible family man.
Cheer up Bro.

Ar u ok? Why shud my wife's mum and siblings come and be staying in my house?

Wakatumbit:
My wife gave birth and her mom has been staying with us for the past 3 months, we have dedicated our baby already and my wife has even learnt to bath the baby and do things by herself when it comes to the baby.

I don't have an issue with the mom staying with us but ever since she came my wife's siblings has been coming to the house, her elder brother and sister and sometimes they stay up to a week.

With the two of them that makes us five in the house and feeding five people in this economy is not easy. I just looked at my bank statement this evening and in the last 2 weeks I've spent over 250k on expenses, from feeding to fuel, to baby food. If it's just me and my wife we won't be spending that much.


I'm thinking of telling my wife to tell her brother and sister to go leaving only they mom and they shouldn't be coming at all, they can visit but they shouldn't stay.

My family doesn't come around a lot and when they do visit, they don't even stay the night.

But I don't want to make it look like I'm a bad person, so how do I chase them away codedly

aboy, na your house. There's no easy way to do but just do it before they run you down. Tell your wife to talk to them before you talk to them yourself. Ask her in pidgin English "abi you no dey pity me" ?

whatever advise u take from all the options here. .plz come give feedback so we can take a cue from this in future.

✓

Y is this so hard.....sir communication is important including issues like this irrespective of either is ur family or her family ....u and her and the baby is now immediate family every other family becomes extended .... U less u know the type of woman u marry that she would not reason and understand with u .... As at now ....call her and tell her that everyone needs to go including her mum ....if she is not ready. Bros don't drop money for food it was ur family coming like that she will have discuss or fight u.... That y make we get partner wey we fit talk with irrespective of wetin he be

FreeSpirited:
Plan a fake travel or conference together with ur wife...tell them ur family have to travel....they should have sense with this scope and fly out of ur life. Ur wife has to support u on this or else it won't work...
.
2nd scope is to tell them directly that, your ability to take full responsibility of the house is becoming unbearable in this hard economy that ur earnings can not support more than 2 mouths at the moment coupled with expensive baby food, that u are resorting to borrow.......If u can do this second trips... they will respect ur manliness or boldness and won't take u for granted cos they know u wont take rubbish.

3rd scope......If the above 2 don't work,,,,,,then reduce the quality of food they cook and eat drastically...This scope is a silent scope....u dont need to explain to ur wife, just cook a fake story of how u no longer have enough cash...maybe work related or project related...make ur wife believe the fake story....
.
E.g if they use fish for stew, cut it to only egg.....reduce soup to once a week or once in two weeks....let them eat more of beans( give them garri with the beans instead of dodo+bread) cook vegetables soup without meat, instead use Shawa fish...lol....this may cause quarell with ur wife,,,don't shy away from the quarrel, infact welcome it and use the avenue to voice out on ur wife so that everyone will hear ur complain of lack of fund and have sense.....
.
Economy is hard, they are using u to chop free food..... ...u have to be smart or die in silence

Bad guy!

For me the only thing you will do now is to just scope your wife mother. If she agree make you dey lash both of them

Shameless inlaws ..

Call your friends in the armed forces , let them come see you without uniforms on , let them come heavily armed and mean looking, when they arrive take your wife into a car and dispatch her to a hotel for 3 days , let the family members know they have to leave before night time , give them money and dispatch them too , make sure the men clean and stack up ammo and ammunition, placing cutlasses knives and bullets all over hidden places , and make audible discussions about killings and hot to kill assassins into your house , nna them no go tell akpa to jakpa, they will be gone with the wind

Una go just dey carry load wey pass una because una wan impress

In omugwo the woman can not go till you settle her.
So start the settlement, buy the Wrapper, salt, rice and ask her when she is going back.
If she goes back, you can easily handle her children

samwash:
Like the saying "To be a man is not a days' job"
This is one of the sacrifices of a responsible family man.
Cheer up Bro.

An idiot wit the brain of a fool have spoken

Start a talk by appreciating the mum and what she has done. Pray God will help you repay her. Ask if their dad is not missing his beloved heart rob and concluded by asking when she's going so you can start preparing for her departure so she won't leave empty handed.

From there you will know their intentions

Wakatumbit:
My wife gave birth and her mom has been staying with us for the past 3 months, we have dedicated our baby already and my wife has even learnt to bath the baby and do things by herself when it comes to the baby.

I don't have an issue with the mom staying with us but ever since she came my wife's siblings has been coming to the house, her elder brother and sister and sometimes they stay up to a week.

With the two of them that makes us five in the house and feeding five people in this economy is not easy. I just looked at my bank statement this evening and in the last 2 weeks I've spent over 250k on expenses, from feeding to fuel, to baby food. If it's just me and my wife we won't be spending that much.


I'm thinking of telling my wife to tell her brother and sister to go leaving only they mom and they shouldn't be coming at all, they can visit but they shouldn't stay.

My family doesn't come around a lot and when they do visit, they don't even stay the night.

But I don't want to make it look like I'm a bad person, so how do I chase them away codedly

Just carry marchet pursue them

samwash:
Like the saying "To be a man is not a days' job"
This is one of the sacrifices of a responsible family man.
Cheer up Bro.

why are you sounding like this? is not a must to comment

arrange with your landlord to come to ur room and warn u that he doesn't want to see any visitor expect the old mama/or he'll increase ur house rent by 100%.it work like fire.Try am

Quite a sensitive matter. We don't know your wife's level of understanding in such matters, so its hard to tell you to discuss with her. What if she takes it wrongly.

In my opinion, tell your wife things are a bit rough now, if you are currently dropping Naira10 for feeding, reduce it to Naira4, tell your wife that's what you have for now. If possible, you can eat out for now.

Whenever her brothers and sisters show, they should all manage the Naira4, and if there is nothing for her siblings, they will drink water and go back to their houses.

plan urgent travel to your place

mmadu5:
are you the man of the house or the woman of the house . like WTF . You cant even make decision on your own without coming to NL .. look mr Man. tell them to leave your house. that you married their daughter and not them..unless you didnt pay the pride price. then i can understands. grow some balls mr man i hate weaklings

Oga calm down sir. This is a family affair. You don't go destroying bridges you can't build. From the op, he's not complaining of the MIL staying, it's the other sibling staying over dat is depleting his income. I think the siblings are not working though, otherwise, wù will abandon his/her work for a long term visit? He should talk to the wife on the amicable way to resolve this family issue. The brother-in-law you treat anyhow today might be ur only grace tomorrow. Thread carefully.

IF YOUR WIFE GIVE BIRTH TO GIRL CHILD, THEY WILL DO THE SAME TO YOU IN THE FUTURE

FreeSpirited:
Plan a fake travel or conference together with ur wife...tell them ur family have to travel....they should have sense with this scope and fly out of ur life. Ur wife has to support u on this or else it won't work...
.
2nd scope is to tell them directly that, your ability to take full responsibility of the house is becoming unbearable in this hard economy that ur earnings can not support more than 2 mouths at the moment coupled with expensive baby food, that u are resorting to borrow.......If u can do this second trips... they will respect ur manliness or boldness and won't take u for granted cos they know u wont take rubbish.

3rd scope......If the above 2 don't work,,,,,,then reduce the quality of food they cook and eat drastically...This scope is a silent scope....u dont need to explain to ur wife, just cook a fake story of how u no longer have enough cash...maybe work related or project related...make ur wife believe the fake story....
.
E.g if they use fish for stew, cut it to only egg.....reduce soup to once a week or once in two weeks....let them eat more of beans( give them garri with the beans instead of dodo+bread) cook vegetables soup without meat, instead use Shawa fish...lol....this may cause quarell with ur wife,,,don't shy away from the quarrel, infact welcome it and use the avenue to voice out on ur wife so that everyone will hear ur complain of lack of fund and have sense.....
.
Economy is hard, they are using u to chop free food..... ...u have to be smart or die in silence

This guy 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

E be like you don be warder before, maybe in Kirikiri maximum prison..

Your intervention is wosky😁😁😁😂

My brother, no lie! na knocking dey hungry. Be patient, your in-laws will soon go! Just be patient. You want to knack your wife, baby is just 3 months.

Wakatumbit:
My wife gave birth and her mom has been staying with us for the past 3 months, we have dedicated our baby already and my wife has even learnt to bath the baby and do things by herself when it comes to the baby.

I don't have an issue with the mom staying with us but ever since she came my wife's siblings has been coming to the house, her elder brother and sister and sometimes they stay up to a week.

With the two of them that makes us five in the house and feeding five people in this economy is not easy. I just looked at my bank statement this evening and in the last 2 weeks I've spent over 250k on expenses, from feeding to fuel, to baby food. If it's just me and my wife we won't be spending that much.


I'm thinking of telling my wife to tell her brother and sister to go leaving only they mom and they shouldn't be coming at all, they can visit but they shouldn't stay.

My family doesn't come around a lot and when they do visit, they don't even stay the night.

But I don't want to make it look like I'm a bad person, so how do I chase them away codedly

This is a simple thing to do, women are selfish by nature and always want comfortable life, so you just have to start from your wife, who is not likely to compromise her comfort over anything else.

Tell your wife something happened that eat up or drain your finance and start dropping little that would only feed 2 persons, tell her to feed baby with breast milk alone, that you can't afford baby food again. In less than one week, your wife will communicate with her people and force them to leave withiout your input.

Note: you must sounds genuine and place yourself on sad mood. May God give us all enough wealth and space that wont compell us to be looking for a way to chase anyone out.

mmadu5:
are you the man of the house or the woman of the house . like WTF . You cant even make decision on your own without coming to NL .. look mr Man. tell them to leave your house. that you married their daughter and not them..unless you didnt pay the pride price. then i can understands. grow some balls mr man i hate weaklings

This is not how to handle family matter.

He should sit his wife down and talk to her, if the wife ignored, he should have a spending budget and stick with that. Only the baby will get everything he needs.
This way, the wife will be forced to either add up to the expenses or do the needful.

samwash:
Like the saying "To be a man is not a days' job"
This is one of the sacrifices of a responsible family man.
Cheer up Bro.

You just talk madd man talk,so he should feed four adults because he's a man? You don't know that even his wife could leave him if the funds stop coming.

onome25:

Omo this one loud ooooo

E reach to ask....

Its very simple just stop buying general food in the kitchen that anyone can go and cook. Just get the one your wife and mother will eat, you can eat outside and return home in the evening and sleep and continue everyday like that. Your wife will eact and start asking question since its her family they will not understand but they will understand if its your family, just tell her the koko, i have not been paid or my money is depleting seriously and i am struggling but will get there. Don't be serious or start argument just continue keeping playing concern persons you use to be, if three square meal reduce to one meal, dem no dey tell blind man say rain dey fall.
This is exactly what end Biafra war so i heard o. Please can someone confirm?