pocohantas:


Exactly. They refuse to face the main issue here and resort to the usual subtle gaslighting of women to stay in unhealthy marriages.

The main issues are women taking on the responsibility of the kids alone after divorce.

Lack of financial capability.

Lack of moral willpower.

However, some go into a wild stage of their lives. So contrary to posts that they are helpless sidechciks, they know what they are doing. They don't want marriage again. They only want a partner. What better man for that than an adulterous (polygamous) man. It is a win win for both parties.

Any grown woman who would resort to sleeping around for 20k to feed herself was never supposed to be a wife in the first place.

You see that your first paragraph ehn! The matter dey weak me, especially when it comes from fellow women.

I hate statements like, it rains every where, there is no perfect marriage, etc. And I am starting to feel a strong dislike for people who push out such narratives because these narratives are false, they can be so misleading and inaccurate.

I talked about this with Farfalla on a different thread some time ago. A bad marriage is like a bad job, you often hear the same narratives in both situations.

I left a bad job for a new and different one, and boy, am I having a great time at the new job. I can't even begin to explain what a world of difference that has made in my life. I feel good, I actually enjoy going to work and doing the work, come rain, sunshine and mad traffic.

Modified to add; It does not rain every where and while there is no perfect marriage, there are excellent and enjoyable marriages. Not perfect, but still sweet and enjoyable, why should I shackle myself to a bad one, in the name of, it rains every where?

Klass99:


He is a hypocrite if you ask me.

You can't be condemning people for a certain kind of lifestyle and actively participating in the same sort of lifestyle yourself.

Biko, what is the difference between him and his escorts? Abeg, the guy is a brolosho. That was my first thought and initial impression of him after reading that post.

I got your point which definitely aligns with mine. But you know in life you just past on an information and it is now left for the other person to accept and internalize it. You can't force it down the person's throat.

folake4u:

Seven kisses to you, my Madam.

21 kisses to you, my small madam.

Fryx:


Na. I don’t do gender equality. A lot makes me a man.

I don’t even believe in fairness. If there is a rule, follow it.

It’s the law of nature that put a woman to look up to a man. Ask any lady if she will choose an inexperienced virgin over an experience one. She will even prefer a married man.

The confusion you created only applies to you and your types. I will never switch my role or relegate it to be equal with a female.

My woman love me more for the way I make her feel than the money I even give her. Tell me how I can make her feel that way if I don’t have experience.

Your role doesn't make u superior to a woman dummy. Your role is your role, and hers is hers. You can't play her role just like she can't play yours.

Your father was and still is a bad example and that is why you think this way. Your mother on the other hand was incapacitated and that is the same reason you think this way. Your so called woman is either playing along becos of what she gets from you,or naive.

pocohantas:


Lol! Just dey play. Naso una go just dey type.
Young fresh girls indeed. If you see the aunties controlling your politicians, you will retract this fallacy. Ravaged in hotels indeed.

Y'all think everything is about youth in cheating. Forgetting there is someting called discretion too. And at some point in man's life and level, he wants a woman who has seen it all and can protect his privacy/home. Not a younger one that would post selfie in his car and feed him to bloggers.

This!!!!!

These set of men will rather go for women that have "something" to lose and have discretion in their dealings together.

Them nor dey go for Gen Z folks wey fit cast them for Whatsapp group.

It's only on Nairaland that I hear "evening newspaper". Na senior madams dey control men of timber and calibre. Make NL boys dey play.

Klass99:


21 kisses to you, my small madam.

Thanks Mama.

Your points? Succinctly stated.💖

Klass99:


You see that your first paragraph ehn! The matter dey weak me, especially when it comes from fellow women.

I hate statements like, it rains every where, there is no perfect marriage, etc. And I am starting to feel a strong dislike for people who push out such narratives because these narratives are false, they can be so misleading and inaccurate.

I talked about this with Farfalla on a different thread some time ago. A bad marriage is like a bad job, you often hear the same narratives in both situations.

I left a bad job for a new and different one, and boy, am I having a great time at the new job. I can't even begin to explain what a world of difference that has made in my life. I feel good, I actually enjoy going to work and doing the work, come rain, sunshine and mad traffic.

At the same time they shame women for staying. "Nigerian women can lick infection off your phallus if you have money. Blablabla"

You do, you are doomed.
You don't do, still doomed.

Nigerian women love marriage so much. Many wouldn't leave if they weren't at their lowest. Worse when kids are involved. She would slug it out for the sake of her kids. There are few who are obviously not cut out for the sanctity of marriage, but I am sure this isn't the case for majority.

Hahaha! Same here. My former job wasn't toxic, but it was stressful. Yesterday I wondered how I coped. Obviously I didn't have a choice then. Naso this marriage be kwa. Some might get lucky the second time and wonder how they survived the first . Some would see shege that will make them wanna run back to the ex-husband. Indeed there are two sides to it. Like my mum would say, you might think a man is the worst until you taste another one. You will na sit and say chai, if Klass was here, this can't happen. Peaceful co-parenting would make these situations easier on women.

Proserpina:
Basically ,

There is someone for everyone . Na you dey deceive yourself say women get expiry date

My sister!!!😂😂😂😂

Women nor get expiry date at all. The older the berry, the sweeter the juice. Yummy!

Klass99:


Did she take the kids with her when she left?

Some weeks ago a divorced lady shared her story with a radio station about how she left her marriage taking along their 4 kids, only to end up as a side chic to a married man because there wasn't enough income or cash flow to take care of herself and 4 kids.

She left because her husband was cheating and her advice to married women was just stay in your marriage even if hubby is cheating so you don't end up in a situation like mine. At least even with his side chics you remain the main madam he goes home to.

I had issues with her story because;

1. I will never understand why women feel the need to leave and take the children along, particularly when they lack the financial capacity to take care of them. Did you climb on top of yourself to have those children by yourself? Why are we always trying to be super-women and acting like, na we love pikin pass, more than the fathers?

The kind of woman I am though, I will not play myself that way. I didn't go to your house with children, I will not leave with children, I will leave as I came. And we will find a way to co-parent!

We let men get away with far too much in Naija, let them start feeling the consequences of separation and divorce too, by leaving him with his children and awakening him to the realities of a wife and mother' absence, after all is it not his name they bear? And NL men in particular claim we bring nothing to the table, so leave the table with nothing too when going.

2. Cheating husbands can infect you with an STD, curable and incurable ones. I am personally aware of three women and one of those women married as a virgin, she never cheated on her husband in marriage.

One clown on page two is boasting of picking escorts and fcking around, he is the kind to infect a virgin wife with disease. Chances are, that when wifey is heavily pregnant, and can't satisfy his urge he will still call one of those escorts and take home a disease at some point.

My own is that the day I have to treat myself for an STI and I know I didn't cheat, you better be sleeping with one eye open and that will signal the beginning of the end.

one of the worst things you can do to children, imho, is leave them with their father

a large number of nigerian men simply do not know how to take care of children and will outsource 90% of the tasks to someone else

at best an already old grand mother or at worst one aunty like that

this leaves the children at risk of being molested

you want an idea of how careless the average nigerian father can be - one day i was at a supermarket and a man was with his child who needed to piss. and he handed the child over to a security guard to take the kid to a toilet. i immediately barked at the guy and asked him what he was doing, putting his child and the childs genitals in the hands of a complete stranger

davido is another example. the man is making noise about co parenting imade, but his own son died under his roof. his house is more of a frat house than a home. can you feel comfortable leaving your pikin for a sleepover at the house of a person like davido? how many men are built for the sacrifices of raising children?

you have already said more the price you are not interested in kids, so maybe thats why you may be missing the issue.

a woman can tell if her husband is capable of taking care of the children on his own

also, to be much more cynical,about it - children are an unhappy Nigerian wifes long game revenge against her husband.
be there for the children in their childhood, and they will be there for you in your old age. a lot of nigerian fathers do not have any relationship with their kids beyond being an atm and the dispenser of discipline. and this is something a lot of nigerian women actively encourage a father who is a distant authority figure.

Most boys here didn't have a good example of a father. The father they have is one that oppressed their mothers. The mothers, endured the oppression, so they believe a woman is at the mercy of a man. Even a boy who is not married feels he is superior to a woman because he owns a penis. It's actually not their fault. If they know better they will do and say better.

I will just give u little home training, before u say anything about a woman, try to look at her through the lens of
1. Your mother
2. Your sister
3. Your wife
4. Your daughter (s)
A real man respects a woman. Your father didn't teach you that I'm sure.

folake4u:


This!!!!!

These set of men will rather go for women that have "something" to lose and have discretion in their dealings together.

Them nor dey go for Gen Z folks wey fit cast them for Whatsapp group.

It's only on Nairaland that I hear "evening newspaper". Na senior madams dey control men of timber and calibre. Make NL boys dey play.

I think it is age and circle that makes some guys think classifying and enjoying women is as simple as age. Majority of the women I know in this game are not young. These are women I would call sis/aunty. The other day one living in my ex-colleague's house moved out. He told me to patronise her supermarket in the area. I was shocked. How did she go from a mini-flat to owning this big store, a house and car? He said hah, the woman works in one of LASG offices and hooked an Oga. A young girl won't even have mind to ask for those things. Her problem would first be iPhone, clothe and restaurant.

folake4u:


My sister!!!😂😂😂😂

Women nor get expiry date at all. The older the berry, the sweeter the juice. Yummy!

I tell you

pocohantas:


I think it is age and circle that makes some guys think classifying and enjoying women is as simple as age. Majority of the women I know in this game are not young. These are women I would call sis/aunty. The other day one living in my ex-colleague's house moved out. He told me to patronise her supermarket in the area. I was shocked. How did she go from a mini-flat to owning this big store, a house and car? He said hah, the woman works in one of LASG offices and hooked an Oga. A young girl won't even have mind to ask for those things. Her problem would first be iPhone, clothe and restaurant.

there is a reason we have the word MILF
and some of the most successful p-ornstars are older women.

pocohantas:


I think it is age and circle that makes some guys think classifying and enjoying women is as simple as age. Majority of the women I know in this game are not young. These are women I would call sis/aunty. The other day one living in my ex-colleague's house moved out. He told me to patronise her supermarket in the area. I was shocked. How did she go from a mini-flat to owning this big store, a house and car? He said hah, the woman works in one of LASG offices and hooked an Oga. A young girl won't even have mind to ask for those things. Her problem would first be iPhone, clothe and restaurant.

Yes, that is correct.

How many Gen Z ladies fit get mind to tell sugar daddy to open supermarket?😂😂😂

Proserpina:
I tell you

Lol, make them dey play.

folake4u:


Yes, that is correct.

Even in the former workplace in my state, the former female Boss I worked with had senior Men that were sponsoring her lifestyle and because she liked me too, I enjoyed!!!!! I went to places I didn't have access to, met notable dignitaries as well, hotel staycation was a norm. I'm not cut out for that lifestyle, na why I nor do.

But her friends and she herself aren't small women. Women in their 40s upwards!!!!

How many Gen Z ladies fit get mind to tell sugar daddy to open supermarket?😂😂😂

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UoQClfe7BHI

GloriousGbola:




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UoQClfe7BHI

This video is very relatable.

Mandiel:


Your role doesn't make u superior to a woman dummy. Your role is your role, and hers is hers. You can't play her role just like she can't play yours.

Your father was and still is a bad example and that is why you think this way. Your mother on the other hand was incapacitated and that is the same reason you think this way. Your so called woman is either playing along becos of what she gets from you,or naive.

Mr ”undummy”. Where did I said I am superior to a woman?

And how do you know the relationship between my father and my mother.

The relationship between my parent is similar to that of Romeo and Juliet. But I don’t blame you, that’s what your little brain is capable of.

Even if you are dumb, I clearly stated my girl loved me for how I make her to feel. I guess people love their boss, dindinrin.

Just pointing out your stupidity. I am not going to engage you.

pocohantas:


Atiku didn't waste his money on a 40yrs old divorcee, but Sanwo Olu was rumoured to be dating Mo in her 50s. Mc Oluomo dated Ehi a divorcee with 4 kids. MC Oluomo dated the ex-wife of the late Alaafin. A mother of 2. Yoruba actresses way into their 40s fight over their elites. Yul left the wife of his youth to marry a mother of 2. Like she was still married when Yul snatched her. Daddy Freeze is set to pay 5m for adultery. The woman is in her 40s. Divorced with 2 or 3 kids. AY's ex-wife is rumoured to be dating a politician. Damilola Adegbite was just exposed as the side chick of a married man. She is a SM of 1. Ini Edo and Akwa Ibom state Gov. Chika Ike and Abia state gov. Ighodalo or what is that footballer's name, was dating the ex-wife of Ubi Franklin. Taking her to the same Bahamas you said they don't take them to. The list goes on...

Interesting expose. But hey, Damilola is a hot chick!

MusafaLion, what do you have to say about this list? Are you going to keep blaming the women as usual?

.

Literally that is the only dating pool available for them. There are too many unmarried and younger girls in the dating world to compete with. I would say, less than 1% of a single men would consider divorcees as girlfriend. Other 3% might consider them as chop and clean mouth if the lady involved is beautiful and financially stable.

advanceDNA:
Sometimes..it's sweeter to be the side chic that goes on regula trip to Bahamas





.....than the to be wife at home being disrespected at doing all the work of mummy, wife, daughter inlaw....

Side chic don dey collect house for lekki oooo..

but can never bear a man's name as a wife which is the dignity of a lady

I don’t even know why Nairaland boys think this is a gotcha. In my ideal world, I want a husband who respects me as much he expects me to respect him. Mutual respect. Mutual faithfulness. Mutual everything.

If I can’t have that, do they really think sitting at home crying over an unfaithful man is better than being single and doing whatever I want without commitment and expectations? I really need them to think about what they feel they are insulting women with.

God forbid I be one of those wives fasting and praying over a cheating/polygamous man. Staying faithful to him and hoping that one day (probably in his old age) when he’s done frolicking with his concubines he’ll bring his sick old and tired body for me nurse.

I 100% support the divorces they’re going through.
Let’s all be mad together.

pocohantas:


Atiku didn't waste his money on a 40yrs old divorcee, but Sanwo Olu was rumoured to be dating Mo in her 50s.

Mc Oluomo dated Ehi a divorcee with 4 kids.

MC Oluomo dated the ex-wife of the late Alaafin. A mother of 2.

Yoruba actresses way into their 40s fight over their elites.

Yul left the wife of his youth to marry a mother of 2. Like she was still married when Yul snatched her.

Daddy Freeze is set to pay 5m for adultery. The woman is in her 40s. Divorced with 2 or 3 kids.

AY's ex-wife is rumoured to be dating a politician.

Damilola Adegbite was just exposed as the side chick of a married man. She is a SM of 1.

Ini Edo and Akwa Ibom state Gov.

Chika Ike and Abia state gov.

Ighodalo or what is that footballer's name, was dating the ex-wife of Ubi Franklin. Taking her to the same Bahamas you said they don't take them to.

The list goes on...

Mandiel:


I'm sure your mother's pussy will be part of it

But my mother is not like a community b!tch like ur mother..

Abi u don't know??

Did I even direct my words to you?? What an unfortun8 mother u have got

SAMBARRY:
I'm not married so you sef rest

Las las u go still divorce after three kids na

rockyh:
but can never bear a man's name as a wife which is the dignity of a lady

Nigga ...u funny as fvck....

Are u living in 1960..
What the fvck as bearing name gotta do with dignity......so she ddnt have dignity before marriage??.....most women don't even officially change their names after marriage anymore unless the name is powerful or well known and will be of advantage

rockyh:
but can never bear a man's name as a wife which is the dignity of a lady

You want women to believe this so badly

If that’s the dignity of a woman, yall wouldn’t be so quick to disrespect the women you call wives. I’m glad these younger women coming up are watching and learning. They’re re-educating themselves and doing away with the brainwashing

Lmao

Fryx:


Ok.

My babe is a virgin. (I open her leg to check it myself and the hymen is intact)

But she doesn’t mind me having a side babe, knowing I value her.

If I feel like having sex, I call any of my other female friends that I do spend on. But, they all know I won’t marry them.

I take care of their needs and I make them feel like a woman. So, leaving me is quite difficult.

Sometimes too, I carry escorts. And I pay them for their service.

They are worthless not in terms of giving them money. But in terms of building value with them. I won’t build my future with a woman that is comfortable having random sex.

I believe in earning my worth. If I want to enjoy you, I pay for your time. But, I can’t build my future with such women.

Still better than being faithful to a cheating man

In fact she shouldn’t have divorced him. She should have stayed there so he can contribute to the kids care while she’s running her own game just as he is.

What is good for the goose

buJu234:
she is not wrong

just staying the truth that we all know.

i know one that left her marriage over 2years ago with 3 kids in the East, all in the excuse that her husband was cheating.

today she is lagos, fucking any guy fuckable as far they can give 15k and above.

cococandy:
I don’t even know why Nairaland boys think this is a gotcha. In my ideal world, I want a husband who respects me as much he expects me to respect him. Mutual respect. Mutual faithfulness. Mutual everything.

If I can’t have that, do they really think sitting at home crying over an unfaithful man is better than being single and doing whatever I want without commitment and expectations? I really need them to think about what they feel they are insulting women with.

God forbid I be one of those wives fasting and praying over a cheating/polygamous man. Staying faithful to him and hoping that one day (probably in his old age) when he’s done frolicking with his concubines he’ll bring his sick old and tired body for me nurse.

I 100% support the divorces they’re going through.
Let’s all be mad together.

They are desperately trying to put these women in pitiable conditions. Whereas we know some of them know what they were up to before taking the hard decision to divorce their husbands. It is a clear case of good girl no dey pay. Rather than be thr wife crying, let me be the side without commitments and expectations.

I don't know why it is so important to them that women remain in these unhappy marriages. If you desperately want your wife, how hard is it to stay faithful and kind? Nawa o!

2Radii:


But my mother is not like a community b!tch like ur mother..

Abi u don't know??

Did I even direct my words to you?? What an unfortun8 mother u have got

E pain am.! Me I no talk say I dey Bleep anybody pussy ooooo. Na we sit down jeje u Come dey tell us of ur excapades and how ur mama pussy redundant.

Narcissism. They need people to hurt and subdue or they won’t feel complete.

pocohantas:


If you desperately want your wife, how hard is it to stay faithful and kind? Nawa o!