Mannymanny:


First of all, does he make moves to initiate sex? Is he interested?

Yes but unfortunately his kini no b am.

AutoChick4U:
Yes but unfortunately his kini no b am.

U both didn’t get intimate before you got married?
Must be frustrating

Mannymanny:

U both didn’t get intimate before you got married?
Must be frustrating

we not married and I definitely cannot marry him. Best to be with who matches ur pace

AutoChick4U:
we not married and I definitely cannot marry him. Best to be with who matches ur pace

Ohhh you had me lost for a minute...
You can move on then

Mannymanny:

Ohhh you had me lost for a minute...
You can move on then

gracias

Kobojunkie:
um....The images came from your heart in the first place, so obviously your heart did initially OK It even if it eventually regretted it.

The devil is the one who put those thoughts in your mind, how your mind reacts to it by either going with the flow or rebuffing it is what I'm talking about.

enonche85:
The devil is the one who put those thoughts in your mind, how your mind reacts to it by either going with the flow or rebuffing it is what I'm talking about.

The devil does no such thing. As Jesus Christ took time to explain to you in Matthew 15 vs 10 - 20 and Mark 7 vs 13 - 23, all the sinful ideas and sins you commit stem from the fact that you have stored bad things, lies, in your heart. Jesus Christ never mentioned the devil anywhere in His explanation there in those passages.

And according to the same Jesus Christ, the only way to overcome those thoughts is through knowing - accepting and obeying- the Truth(God's Law which clearly defines for us what sin infact is) that one is then set free from bondage to sin by the Truth - John 8 vs 31 - 32

So, the one who put those thoughts in your mind is you everytime you submit yourself to lies and the only way to get those lies out of your mind,to rid yourself of the falsehoods that cause you to sin against God, is by submitting yourself instead to God's Truth.

Kobojunkie:
1. You are the one who is obviously not paying attention at all in this.

Again, according to Jesus Christ, the sin of adultery is committed when one sexually lusts in his heart after another. This is what Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 tells you. .

2. Why should I need to encourage her to marry? Are you under some delusion that everyone who has sexual urges are to marry or something?

And again, Jesus Christ, not I, is the one who told you that sexual lust is adultery, and anger is murder..... so if you have a problem with that, consider that you don't have a real relationship with Jesus Christ at all.

I pity you your type.
Stand there and conclude on people’s relationship I am what I am by the grace of God.
I knew that was going to be your last statement,judgemental .
If I had known you were that kind of person I would not have dignified you buy quoting you.
So Jesus told you anger is murder and he was angry at the temple.
And your bible said be angry and sin not.
And your Jesus said if your tight hand should cause you to sin you should cut it off.
How many people are amputated??
Go back and allow the Holy Spirit to teach you.
I will not Judge you like the Pharisees.

Achorise:
1. I pity you your type. Stand there and conclude on people’s relationship I am what I am by the grace of God.
I knew that was going to be your last statement, judgemental . If I had known you were that kind of person I would not have dignified you buy quoting you.

2. So Jesus told you anger is murder and he was angry at the temple. And your bible said be angry and sin not.
And your Jesus said if your tight hand should cause you to sin you should cut it off. How many people are amputated??

3. Go back and allow the Holy Spirit to teach you.
I will not Judge you like the Pharisees.

1. OK!

2. The same Jesus Christ also taught His followers that what in fact causes one to sin are the lies one stores up in one's heart - not the limbs and eyes, or any part of your body - Matthew 15 vs 10 - 20. It is because of this that Jesus Christ also taught His followers that it is only through continuous acceptance and obedience of His Truth- His teachings and commandments - that one can be set free from bondage to sin by the Truth and be transformed into a Son of God aka a Holy/Perfect vessel worthy of the very Spirit of God Himself - John 8 vs 31 - 32. So you tell me, why would a sane individual amputate his or her limbs given this knowledge of God's Truth?

3. Jesus Christ, my one and only Teacher for that matter, is exactly reason why your ignorance of His Truth does not phase me much.

Optimistic4life:
I'm trying hard to live a life free from sin and sexual immorality and I am doing pretty well but of recent, my hormones/body have been raging and I am finding it difficult to cope.

It's 18months I have been separated and there is no getting back together.

Were you ever in my situation, how did you overcome without involving in sex/masturbation?

I just need some words of encouragement.

Its really not easy and it has become some sort of distraction.

The reason I do not want to have a male friend is because of my fear for God.

I dont care if u are a single mum oh!!, if u are doing for a woman that means u have reduced the stress for a man a little bit, that mean i will like to have you, not just for friendship but something good

Optimistic4life:
I'm trying hard to live a life free from sin and sexual immorality and I am doing pretty well but of recent, my hormones/body have been raging and I am finding it difficult to cope.

It's 18months I have been separated and there is no getting back together.

Were you ever in my situation, how did you overcome without involving in sex/masturbation?

I just need some words of encouragement.

Its really not easy and it has become some sort of distraction.

The reason I do not want to have a male friend is because of my fear for God.

Due to what you have seen as a woman I believe u have learn alot, i just want to shoot my short, am 6 ft and am nice to be with, pls dm i need your type... age is number at this time and generation

Optimistic4life:
I'm trying hard to live a life free from sin and sexual immorality and I am doing pretty well but of recent, my hormones/body have been raging and I am finding it difficult to cope.

It's 18months I have been separated and there is no getting back together.

Were you ever in my situation, how did you overcome without involving in sex/masturbation?

I just need some words of encouragement.

Its really not easy and it has become some sort of distraction.

The reason I do not want to have a male friend is because of my fear for God.

Am ready to father ur kids zero 8 one 6 zero 6five 3 two 08

Last I remember, masturbation is simple and STD-free. Sex is not a necessity in life. I’ve never heard of anyone in the real world who died from not indulging in the act. Children on Nairaland think otherwise. My decades-long experience told me all I needed to know.

Optimistic4life:


This option is definitely not in the picture at all.

He said I am free to remarry if I want but we aren't divorced and also remarrying isn't a day's affair nor a joke.

Hun

Check out adult stores in your location.

Also, go and date. Date, not for remarriage, but for physical pleasure. Meet a man you like, make sure he's safe and discreet and take care of business. Have a guy for chatting and gisting, several guys even. Keep one for business.

Keep serious dating on the back burner for now.

Keep them all from your kids.

That's what men do in your situation and that is what you should do, too.

Move on, m'dear.

And here is the truly beautiful thing (forget, I've seen this happen too many times, I can bet crypto on it sef):

Once you're dating and moving on with your life, that your ex is suddenly going to want to come back, stylishly.

Why?

Because you're peaceful, relaxed and busy. You're not fighting him anymore, you're not bitter, you're not keeping the kids from him. You don't care if he's trying to annoy you or flaunt his new gf in your presence, he is no longer important.

His Limerence and his Mid Life crisis is eventually slowing down. The brain fog in his head is clearing. You're looking good, smelling nice and he can see you through the eyes of other men, you look fu.ckable again.

You're comfortable yet excitingly new.

But please, don't take him back. Don't ever let him come back. If he was dumb enough to leave you, be smart enough to let him go.


And if you think that I'm making this up, that nobody wants a single mum of 3: Nne, go and baff up, do makeup, wear one lovely dress that announces your singleness (you know what I'm taking about, you need heels too) and snap a good pic and upload it to Facebook.

You're about to realise how many of your male uni and secondary school classmates always hoped for a chance with you. And they are usually an upgrade to your ex-man.

The same thing happens with men who were dumped by babes. They stop grieving and start taking care of themselves and suddenly their exes want to come back.

And one last thing: don't feel old.

Mature, rich guys (especially those in Abuja and Lagos) don't like small girls of 24 yrs, they're too young for them. All the big boys, bank MDs, Governonrs, Ministers and Oil big boys are carrying 35 years and older.

Why? Because you're discreet (you have kids, so you're not fighting their wives and aren't planning on trapping them with babies), you're secure in your skin and you're eager for se.x (no need to pretend like you no like am or act like a virgin). Those 20 yr old babes are busy doing Snapchat with him, you, OTOH, have been trained via marriage: you know you will ask him if he has taking his BP meds and listen to him complain about his son's marriage and admire his grandkids. You'll even Like his wife's inspirational posts on IG and be respectful to her. You are not planning on destroying his life, so they are very safe with you.

Na now your market go sell.

I have classmates that are 43, living in a nice flat in Chelsea (UK), being sponsored by people you read about in newspapers. The 25 yr old babes flaunting on IG are for immature Mid Life Crisis guys in their early 40s (who just started collecting N2m/month from an IOC), that want to feel young, all the girls can get is N400k and "thanks" from the serious big men.

Start dressing up and spending 2 hours every weekend on the island, in strategic bars. Something go click.

I am speaking from experience.

Trust me!

Onegai:


Hun. Check out adult stores in your location. Also, go and date. Date, not for remarriage, but for physical pleasure. Meet a man you like, make sure he's safe and discreet and take care of business. Have a guy for chatting and gisting, several guys even. Keep one for business.

Keep serious dating on the back burner for now. Keep them all from your kids. That's what men do in your situation and that is what you should do, too. Move on, m'dear. And here is the truly beautiful thing (forget, I've seen this happen too many times, I can bet crypto on it sef):

Once you're dating and moving on with your life, that your ex is suddenly going to want to come back, stylishly. Why? Because you're peaceful, relaxed and busy. You're not fighting him anymore, you're not bitter, you're not keeping the kids from him. You don't care if he's trying to annoy you or flaunt his new gf in your presence, he is no longer important. His Limerence and his Mid Life crisis is eventually slowing down. The brain fog in his head is clearing. You're looking good, smelling nice and he can see you through the eyes of other men, you look fu.ckable again. You're comfortable yet excitingly new.But please, don't take him back. Don't ever let him come back. If he was dumb enough to leave you, be smart enough to let him go. And if you think that I'm making this up, that nobody wants a single mum of 3: Nne, go and baff up, do makeup, wear one lovely dress that announces your singleness (you know what I'm taking about, you need heels too) and snap a good pic and upload it to Facebook. You're about to realise how many of your male uni and secondary school classmates always hoped for a chance with you. And they are usually an upgrade to your ex-man. Mature, rich guys (especially those in Abuja and Lagos) don't like small girls of 24 yrs, they're too young for them. All the big boys, bank MDs, Governonrs, Ministers and Oil big boys are carrying 35 years and older. Why? Because you're discreet (you have kids, so you're not fighting their wives and aren't planning on trapping them with babies), you're secure in your skin and you're eager for se.x (no need to pretend like you no like am or act like a virgin). Those 20 yr old babes are busy doing Snapchat with him, you, OTOH, have been trained via marriage: you know you will ask him if he has taking his BP meds and listen to him complain about his son's marriage and admire his grandkids. You'll even Like his wife's inspirational posts on IG and be respectful to her. You are not planning on destroying his life, so they are very safe with you. Na now your market go sell.

I have classmates that are 43, living in a nice flat in Chelsea (UK), being sponsored by people you read about in newspapers. The 25 yr old babes flaunting on IG are for immature Mid Life Crisis guys in their early 40s (who just started collecting N2m/month from an IOC), that want to feel young, all the girls can get is N400k and "thanks" from the serious big men. Start dressing up and spending 2 hours every weekend on the island, in strategic bars. Something go click. I am speaking from experience.Trust me!

OP,

Take this advice from Onegai. Any advice she dishes out is gold-plated, trust me. It is like McKinsey's consulting advice. It does not come every day. Who sees Onegai frequent Nairaland? Trust me OP, I no fit lie give you.

---

That said, with this revelation, I hope everyone agrees that it is hard to find a financially comfortable man who practices strict monogamy aka does not cheat, especially as he ages. Whether home or abroad, it is HARD.

Good luck to women looking for a pin in a haystack.

See as the thread nack 18 pages.

I bet if na man create am, e for no pass 5 pages with the sole advice: get a chic outside. E reach woman turn, everybody don turn counsellor. Sha, for OP and those involved, heed to Onegai's advice. Exercise, eat well, smile always, play safe and be happy. Na one life you get o.

Onegai:


Hun

Check out adult stores in your location.

Also, go and date. Date, not for remarriage, but for physical pleasure. Meet a man you like, make sure he's safe and discreet and take care of business. Have a guy for chatting and gisting, several guys even. Keep one for business.

Keep serious dating on the back burner for now.

Keep them all from your kids.

That's what men do in your situation and that is what you should do, too.

Move on, m'dear.

And here is the truly beautiful thing (forget, I've seen this happen too many times, I can bet crypto on it sef):

Once you're dating and moving on with your life, that your ex is suddenly going to want to come back, stylishly.

Why?

Because you're peaceful, relaxed and busy. You're not fighting him anymore, you're not bitter, you're not keeping the kids from him. You don't care if he's trying to annoy you or flaunt his new gf in your presence, he is no longer important.

His Limerence and his Mid Life crisis is eventually slowing down. The brain fog in his head is clearing. You're looking good, smelling nice and he can see you through the eyes of other men, you look fu.ckable again.

You're comfortable yet excitingly new.

But please, don't take him back. Don't ever let him come back. If he was dumb enough to leave you, be smart enough to let him go.


And if you think that I'm making this up, that nobody wants a single mum of 3: Nne, go and baff up, do makeup, wear one lovely dress that announces your singleness (you know what I'm taking about, you need heels too) and snap a good pic and upload it to Facebook.

You're about to realise how many of your male uni and secondary school classmates always hoped for a chance with you. And they are usually an upgrade to your ex-man.

The same thing happens with men who were dumped by babes. They stop grieving and start taking care of themselves and suddenly their exes want to come back.

And one last thing: don't feel old.

Mature, rich guys (especially those in Abuja and Lagos) don't like small girls of 24 yrs, they're too young for them. All the big boys, bank MDs, Governonrs, Ministers and Oil big boys are carrying 35 years and older.

Why? Because you're discreet (you have kids, so you're not fighting their wives and aren't planning on trapping them with babies), you're secure in your skin and you're eager for se.x (no need to pretend like you no like am or act like a virgin). Those 20 yr old babes are busy doing Snapchat with him, you, OTOH, have been trained via marriage: you know you will ask him if he has taking his BP meds and listen to him complain about his son's marriage and admire his grandkids. You'll even Like his wife's inspirational posts on IG and be respectful to her. You are not planning on destroying his life, so they are very safe with you.

Na now your market go sell.

I have classmates that are 43, living in a nice flat in Chelsea (UK), being sponsored by people you read about in newspapers. The 25 yr old babes flaunting on IG are for immature Mid Life Crisis guys in their early 40s (who just started collecting N2m/month from an IOC), that want to feel young, all the girls can get is N400k and "thanks" from the serious big men.

Start dressing up and spending 2 hours every weekend on the island, in strategic bars. Something go click.

I am speaking from experience.

Trust me!

Amazing!

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this perspective, Ma'am. And it is so spot on.

Hats off for you.

folake4u:


Amazing!

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this perspective, Ma'am. And it is so spot on.

Hats off for you.

Na wetin you like be that.

But yes, give it to Onegai. She is good at what she does.

Gerrard59:

Na wetin you like be that.

But yes, give it to Onegai. She is good at what she does.

Lol see .

I love listening to older women (female OGs) who have lived. Their advice is ALWAYS solid. I learn from their experiences in life.

Onegai:


Hun

Check out adult stores in your location.

Also, go and date. Date, not for remarriage, but for physical pleasure. Meet a man you like, make sure he's safe and discreet and take care of business. Have a guy for chatting and gisting, several guys even. Keep one for business.

Keep serious dating on the back burner for now.

Keep them all from your kids.

That's what men do in your situation and that is what you should do, too.

Move on, m'dear.

And here is the truly beautiful thing (forget, I've seen this happen too many times, I can bet crypto on it sef):

Once you're dating and moving on with your life, that your ex is suddenly going to want to come back, stylishly.

Why?

Because you're peaceful, relaxed and busy. You're not fighting him anymore, you're not bitter, you're not keeping the kids from him. You don't care if he's trying to annoy you or flaunt his new gf in your presence, he is no longer important.

His Limerence and his Mid Life crisis is eventually slowing down. The brain fog in his head is clearing. You're looking good, smelling nice and he can see you through the eyes of other men, you look fu.ckable again.

You're comfortable yet excitingly new.

But please, don't take him back. Don't ever let him come back. If he was dumb enough to leave you, be smart enough to let him go.


And if you think that I'm making this up, that nobody wants a single mum of 3: Nne, go and baff up, do makeup, wear one lovely dress that announces your singleness (you know what I'm taking about, you need heels too) and snap a good pic and upload it to Facebook.

You're about to realise how many of your male uni and secondary school classmates always hoped for a chance with you. And they are usually an upgrade to your ex-man.

The same thing happens with men who were dumped by babes. They stop grieving and start taking care of themselves and suddenly their exes want to come back.

And one last thing: don't feel old.

Mature, rich guys (especially those in Abuja and Lagos) don't like small girls of 24 yrs, they're too young for them. All the big boys, bank MDs, Governonrs, Ministers and Oil big boys are carrying 35 years and older.

Why? Because you're discreet (you have kids, so you're not fighting their wives and aren't planning on trapping them with babies), you're secure in your skin and you're eager for se.x (no need to pretend like you no like am or act like a virgin). Those 20 yr old babes are busy doing Snapchat with him, you, OTOH, have been trained via marriage: you know you will ask him if he has taking his BP meds and listen to him complain about his son's marriage and admire his grandkids. You'll even Like his wife's inspirational posts on IG and be respectful to her. You are not planning on destroying his life, so they are very safe with you.

Na now your market go sell.

I have classmates that are 43, living in a nice flat in Chelsea (UK), being sponsored by people you read about in newspapers. The 25 yr old babes flaunting on IG are for immature Mid Life Crisis guys in their early 40s (who just started collecting N2m/month from an IOC), that want to feel young, all the girls can get is N400k and "thanks" from the serious big men.

Start dressing up and spending 2 hours every weekend on the island, in strategic bars. Something go click.

I am speaking from experience.

Trust me!

Hi.Didn't know you're still here.

My dear sister, there is nothing God can not do.
My first question do you still love your husband?
Have you really ask God what He want you to do concerning this your divorce?
From what you wrote, you have a clear conscience and fear of God, Have you ever have a meeting with God in your prayers?
Have you tabled your plan/desire before God?
Seek God's face and God Himself will guide you.
I believe and I know God has not conclude your marriage. There is something God want to do in your life and it is better you seek God's face more and more.

Trust God and trust God to do the best for you. Shallom

Optimistic4life:
I'm trying hard to live a life free from sin and sexual immorality and I am doing pretty well but of recent, my hormones/body have been raging and I am finding it difficult to cope.

It's 18months I have been separated and there is no getting back together.

Were you ever in my situation, how did you overcome without involving in sex/masturbation?

I just need some words of encouragement.

Its really not easy and it has become some sort of distraction.

The reason I do not want to have a male friend is because of my fear for God.

your ancestors knew this and they have programmed the society to suit you , get married again or get into a serious relationship with the aid of your dad, uncle and brother , any man will to mess with you will reconsider because of your father's figure

Gerrard59:

OP,

Take this advice from Onegai. Any advice she dishes out is gold-plated, trust me. It is like McKinsey's consulting advice. It does not come every day. Who sees Onegai frequent Nairaland? Trust me OP, I no fit lie give you.

---

That said, with this revelation, I hope everyone agrees that it is hard to find a financially comfortable man who practices strict monogamy aka does not cheat, especially as he ages. Whether home or abroad, it is HARD.

Good luck to women looking for a pin in a haystack.

Rich men cheating is really about buying a product. The poorer the society, the less morals its people can afford. Which is what infidelity is in Nigeria: poverty-alleviation program. It's only daft immature guys who believe their Affair Partner loves them seriously.

Which is why I'm always irritated when I see Yul Edochie and Rude Boy (P-Square). I've spoken to my male relatives their age and older and they're all in unison:

"God forbid I impregnate any girl or start raising any baby at age 40+, when I should be getting ready to finally enjoy my money".

Especially that Yul Edochie. Man is going to one corner of his neighbourhood to weep silently.

You always know when they're full of regret but their ego won't let them go back (so that they don't become laughing-stock): that's when the public show of love with the new babe will be plenty. Serious flaunting. just know the tears cried into their pillows are hot. The babe herself will be doing extra to cover up the growing feeling that she messed up but is now stuck with an older man and if the ex-wife doesn't give a shi.t anymore, then she has nothing to motivate her and feed her own ego.

You think I'm lying? Look at Bianca Ojukwu or any other woman in that setting. They know that not only are they wasting their prime with an older man, but the minute he croaks, his older kids are coming for even her pots and cutlery that he bought her. Wounded cubs turn into vicious adult lions.


Go to countries like Russia and Eastern European countries, those babes are not marrying for love, they're hardened. Same with Asians.

Iceland and Greenland have the lowest infidelity rates, because they're countries where opportunities for men and women are somewhat equal. So as your man dey step out, you too are following suit.

PS: thanks for the kind words.

thorpido:
Hi.Didn't know you're still here.

Hallo!

I finally remembered my password. How have you been?

Onegai:


Rich men cheating is really about buying a product. The poorer the society, the less morals its people can afford. Which is what infidelity is in Nigeria: poverty-alleviation program. It's only daft immature guys who believe their Affair Partner loves them seriously.

Which is why I'm always irritated when I see Yul Edochie and Rude Boy (P-Square). I've spoken to my male relatives their age and older and they're all in unison:

"God forbid I impregnate any girl or start raising any baby at age 40+, when I should be getting ready to finally enjoy my money".

Especially that Yul Edochie. Man is going to one corner of his neighbourhood to weep silently.

You always know when they're full of regret but their ego won't let them go back (so that they don't become laughing-stock): that's when the public show of love with the new babe will be plenty. Serious flaunting. just know the tears cried into their pillows are hot. The babe herself will be doing extra to cover up the growing feeling that she messed up but is now stuck with an older man and if the ex-wife doesn't give a shi.t anymore, then she has nothing to motivate her and feed her own ego.

You think I'm lying? Look at Bianca Ojukwu or any other woman in that setting. They know that not only are they wasting their prime with an older man, but the minute he croaks, his older kids are coming for even her pots and cutlery that he bought her. Wounded cubs turn into vicious adult lions.


Go to countries like Russia and Eastern European countries, those babes are not marrying for love, they're hardened. Same with Asians.

Iceland and Greenland have the lowest infidelity rates, because they're countries where opportunities for men and women are somewhat equal. So as your man dey step out, you too are following suit.

PS: thanks for the kind words.

Onegai, you have dropping bangers back to back and I must say it's good to read your posts 😀

Keep them coming !

Where

Onegai:


Hallo!

I finally remembered my password. How have you been?

I have been cool.Hope biz and family is doing well.

Onegai:


Rich men cheating is really about buying a product. The poorer the society, the less morals its people can afford. Which is what infidelity is in Nigeria: poverty-alleviation program. It's only daft immature guys who believe their Affair Partner loves them seriously.
.

It depends on how the values of the woman involved. I'm quoting this comment, but I'm referring to your first one. At face value, it makes sense. However, considering that the OP holds Christian values, your advice seems like the devil's whispers of temptation.

1) Most men will not sleep with married women. So, why try to get her to emulate the behavior of opening her legs for married men?
2) No woman in her right mind with any amount of decent fear of God should be thinking of having multiple side Niggars and have them cater to her needs. What kind of codded prostitution are you advertising? The OP doesn't have financial problems, just emotional ones. So, I don't understand how the "street smart" take enter inside.
3) From the OP's position, she needs to cater to her sexual needs without infringing on her religious morals. So, bad advice from you.
4) I like the "Rich men cheating is really about buying a product," what I don't understand is the willingness to become the "Product." Why the "repackaging" advice to OP? Are you trying to help OP or turn OP into a sperm bank for men who are looking for "products" to empty their Vas deferens into?
5) Are there no divorced men who are also looking forcommited relationships? Why must a God-fearing woman turn into a side chick?

Every advice you've given besides "baffing up and advertising her singleness" is against her morals. Haba! no be so, them they give advice now. It's like advising a fair-skinned lady to buy a makeup kit best suited for darker skin.

Reminds me of my past.

A female student of mine, a while ago, asked me if it was okay to have pre-marital sex, and she was feeling Hot. Bear in mind, that I am an atheist. So, I don't have any issues with anything consensual sex(Aside from sleeping with married men and women of course). I could have told her "Oh, the bible is a sham. Knack as you please." That wouldn't solve the problem. Instead, I had to consider her moral framework. And said, I paraphrase, "Well, you know I'm atheist, so the answer you'll get from me is quite different from what your brothers, parents, or pastors will say."

To cut the story short, I told her that if she strongly believes pre-marital sex is a sin, then she must either do away with that belief or wait till marriage. Otherwise, If both of them were ready (both were first-timers) are came from a place of love then it was okay, and nothing was wrong according to the bible. Of course, a little biblical interpretation was done.

Not that your advise isn't solid, it's just not for the right person.

Go to countries like Russia and Eastern European countries, those babes are not marrying for love, they're hardened. Same with Asians.

I think you mean hypergamy. But, I doubt "those babes" aren't marrying for love and that they are "hardened." After all, wealthy men/women are scarcer than social media will have us believe.

Rich men cheating is really about buying a product. The poorer the society, the less morals its people can afford. This is what infidelity is in Nigeria: poverty-alleviation program. It's only daft immature guys who believe their Affair Partner loves them seriously.

hmmm... especially for older men with much younger ladies.But, that one is no concern sugar daddy. Him own an to release and make she go.

If OP sha dey Lagos, she can take your advice. I don't think people love themselves in that state

Onegai:


Rich men cheating is really about buying a product. The poorer the society, the less morals its people can afford. Which is what infidelity is in Nigeria: poverty-alleviation program. It's only daft immature guys who believe their Affair Partner loves them seriously.

Agreed.

Which is why I'm always irritated when I see Yul Edochie and Rude Boy (P-Square). I've spoken to my male relatives their age and older and they're all in unison:

"God forbid I impregnate any girl or start raising any baby at age 40+, when I should be getting ready to finally enjoy my money".

Especially that Yul Edochie. Man is going to one corner of his neighbourhood to weep silently.

This means I was right when I thought about a scenario where well-to-do men undergo vasectomy so they get the full benefits of having extramarital affairs. These new women will want to have their babies so they have a say in the family. A vasectomy prevents that from the man's side.

You always know when they're full of regret but their ego won't let them go back (so that they don't become laughing-stock): that's when the public show of love with the new babe will be plenty. Serious flaunting. just know the tears cried into their pillows are hot. The babe herself will be doing extra to cover up the growing feeling that she messed up but is now stuck with an older man and if the ex-wife doesn't give a shi.t anymore, then she has nothing to motivate her and feed her own ego.

You think I'm lying? Look at Bianca Ojukwu or any other woman in that setting. They know that not only are they wasting their prime with an older man, but the minute he croaks, his older kids are coming for even her pots and cutlery that he bought her. Wounded cubs turn into vicious adult lions. Go to countries like Russia and Eastern European countries, those babes are not marrying for love, they're hardened. Same with Asians. Iceland and Greenland have the lowest infidelity rates, because they're countries where opportunities for men and women are somewhat equal. So as your man dey step out, you too are following suit.

Interesting stuff. You know this too well.

I’ve missed your posts

Hahaha

Always direct. No holier than those virtuousness.

Stay a while

Onegai:


Hun

Check out adult stores in your location.

Also, go and date. Date, not for remarriage, but for physical pleasure. Meet a man you like, make sure he's safe and discreet and take care of business. Have a guy for chatting and gisting, several guys even. Keep one for business.

Keep serious dating on the back burner for now.

Keep them all from your kids.

That's what men do in your situation and that is what you should do, too.

Move on, m'dear.

And here is the truly beautiful thing (forget, I've seen this happen too many times, I can bet crypto on it sef):

Once you're dating and moving on with your life, that your ex is suddenly going to want to come back, stylishly.

Why?

Because you're peaceful, relaxed and busy. You're not fighting him anymore, you're not bitter, you're not keeping the kids from him. You don't care if he's trying to annoy you or flaunt his new gf in your presence, he is no longer important.

His Limerence and his Mid Life crisis is eventually slowing down. The brain fog in his head is clearing. You're looking good, smelling nice and he can see you through the eyes of other men, you look fu.ckable again.

You're comfortable yet excitingly new.

But please, don't take him back. Don't ever let him come back. If he was dumb enough to leave you, be smart enough to let him go.


And if you think that I'm making this up, that nobody wants a single mum of 3: Nne, go and baff up, do makeup, wear one lovely dress that announces your singleness (you know what I'm taking about, you need heels too) and snap a good pic and upload it to Facebook.

You're about to realise how many of your male uni and secondary school classmates always hoped for a chance with you. And they are usually an upgrade to your ex-man.

The same thing happens with men who were dumped by babes. They stop grieving and start taking care of themselves and suddenly their exes want to come back.

And one last thing: don't feel old.

Mature, rich guys (especially those in Abuja and Lagos) don't like small girls of 24 yrs, they're too young for them. All the big boys, bank MDs, Governonrs, Ministers and Oil big boys are carrying 35 years and older.

Why? Because you're discreet (you have kids, so you're not fighting their wives and aren't planning on trapping them with babies), you're secure in your skin and you're eager for se.x (no need to pretend like you no like am or act like a virgin). Those 20 yr old babes are busy doing Snapchat with him, you, OTOH, have been trained via marriage: you know you will ask him if he has taking his BP meds and listen to him complain about his son's marriage and admire his grandkids. You'll even Like his wife's inspirational posts on IG and be respectful to her. You are not planning on destroying his life, so they are very safe with you.

Na now your market go sell.

I have classmates that are 43, living in a nice flat in Chelsea (UK), being sponsored by people you read about in newspapers. The 25 yr old babes flaunting on IG are for immature Mid Life Crisis guys in their early 40s (who just started collecting N2m/month from an IOC), that want to feel young, all the girls can get is N400k and "thanks" from the serious big men.

Start dressing up and spending 2 hours every weekend on the island, in strategic bars. Something go click.

I am speaking from experience.

Trust me!

I agree with some parts of your post but the idea that most men will not sleep with a married woman is so not true. Most men will. And do.

kkins25:


It depends on how the values of the woman involved. I'm quoting this comment, but I'm referring to your first one. At face value, it makes sense. However, considering that the OP holds Christian values, your advice seems like the devil's whispers of temptation.

1) Most men will not sleep with married women. So, why try to get her to emulate the behavior of opening her legs for married men?
2) No woman in her right mind with any amount of decent fear of God should be thinking of having multiple side Niggars and have them cater to her needs. What kind of codded prostitution are you advertising? The OP doesn't have financial problems, just emotional ones. So, I don't understand how the "street smart" take enter inside.
3) From the OP's position, she needs to cater to her sexual needs without infringing on her religious morals. So, bad advice from you.
4) I like the "Rich men cheating is really about buying a product," what I don't understand is the willingness to become the "Product." Why the "repackaging" advice to OP? Are you trying to help OP or turn OP into a sperm bank for men who are looking for "products" to empty their Vas deferens into?
5) Are there no divorced men who are also looking forcommited relationships? Why must a God-fearing woman turn into a side chick?

Every advice you've given besides "baffing up and advertising her singleness" is against her morals. Haba! no be so, them they give advice now. It's like advising a fair-skinned lady to buy a makeup kit best suited for darker skin.

Reminds me of my past.

A female student of mine, a while ago, asked me if it was okay to have pre-marital sex, and she was feeling Hot. Bear in mind, that I am an atheist. So, I don't have any issues with anything consensual sex(Aside from sleeping with married men and women of course). I could have told her "Oh, the bible is a sham. Knack as you please." That wouldn't solve the problem. Instead, I had to consider her moral framework. And said, I paraphrase, "Well, you know I'm atheist, so the answer you'll get from me is quite different from what your brothers, parents, or pastors will say."

To cut the story short, I told her that if she strongly believes pre-marital sex is a sin, then she must either do away with that belief or wait till marriage. Otherwise, If both of them were ready (both were first-timers) are came from a place of love then it was okay, and nothing was wrong according to the bible. Of course, a little biblical interpretation was done.

Not that your advise isn't solid, it's just not for the right person.




I think you mean hypergamy. But, I doubt "those babes" aren't marrying for love and that they are "hardened." After all, wealthy men/women are scarcer than social media will have us believe.



hmmm... especially for older men with much younger ladies.But, that one is no concern sugar daddy. Him own an to release and make she go.

If OP sha dey Lagos, she can take your advice. I don't think people love themselves in that state

Onegai:


Hun

Check out adult stores in your location.

Also, go and date. Date, not for remarriage, but for physical pleasure. Meet a man you like, make sure he's safe and discreet and take care of business. Have a guy for chatting and gisting, several guys even. Keep one for business.

Keep serious dating on the back burner for now.

Keep them all from your kids.

That's what men do in your situation and that is what you should do, too.

Move on, m'dear.

And here is the truly beautiful thing (forget, I've seen this happen too many times, I can bet crypto on it sef):

Once you're dating and moving on with your life, that your ex is suddenly going to want to come back, stylishly.

Why?

Because you're peaceful, relaxed and busy. You're not fighting him anymore, you're not bitter, you're not keeping the kids from him. You don't care if he's trying to annoy you or flaunt his new gf in your presence, he is no longer important.

His Limerence and his Mid Life crisis is eventually slowing down. The brain fog in his head is clearing. You're looking good, smelling nice and he can see you through the eyes of other men, you look fu.ckable again.

You're comfortable yet excitingly new.

But please, don't take him back. Don't ever let him come back. If he was dumb enough to leave you, be smart enough to let him go.


And if you think that I'm making this up, that nobody wants a single mum of 3: Nne, go and baff up, do makeup, wear one lovely dress that announces your singleness (you know what I'm taking about, you need heels too) and snap a good pic and upload it to Facebook.

You're about to realise how many of your male uni and secondary school classmates always hoped for a chance with you. And they are usually an upgrade to your ex-man.

The same thing happens with men who were dumped by babes. They stop grieving and start taking care of themselves and suddenly their exes want to come back.

And one last thing: don't feel old.

Mature, rich guys (especially those in Abuja and Lagos) don't like small girls of 24 yrs, they're too young for them. All the big boys, bank MDs, Governonrs, Ministers and Oil big boys are carrying 35 years and older.

Why? Because you're discreet (you have kids, so you're not fighting their wives and aren't planning on trapping them with babies), you're secure in your skin and you're eager for se.x (no need to pretend like you no like am or act like a virgin). Those 20 yr old babes are busy doing Snapchat with him, you, OTOH, have been trained via marriage: you know you will ask him if he has taking his BP meds and listen to him complain about his son's marriage and admire his grandkids. You'll even Like his wife's inspirational posts on IG and be respectful to her. You are not planning on destroying his life, so they are very safe with you.

Na now your market go sell.

I have classmates that are 43, living in a nice flat in Chelsea (UK), being sponsored by people you read about in newspapers. The 25 yr old babes flaunting on IG are for immature Mid Life Crisis guys in their early 40s (who just started collecting N2m/month from an IOC), that want to feel young, all the girls can get is N400k and "thanks" from the serious big men.

Start dressing up and spending 2 hours every weekend on the island, in strategic bars. Something go click.

I am speaking from experience.

Trust me!

Expert. You sabi the game.

cococandy:
I agree with some parts of your post but the idea that most men will not sleep with a married woman is so not true. Most men will. And do.

If truly most men won't sleep with married women, there would have been no measures put in place by same men to ensure their wives don't cheat. From magun to swearing oaths in some cultures. Or is it the DNA cries? MILF?

I want to believe it is just to make women think they are undesirable as they age/marry. Which is only applicable to women who they have used gruesome-virtuousness to suck all her nectar or the ones that let go. If you are an attractive married woman. Preferably the one whose husband is flexing and giving peace of mind, men will approach you. Heavy men, because the younger ones won't have mind to put body.

I said that same thing Onegaì said about a month back and some were arguing with me. I laugh!!!