Hello please family I need to sample your opinion.
My daughter will soon be going to secondary school so please I need your opinion. day or boarding school which is most preferred? Experienced advice please

Thank you

Saao:
Hello please family I need to sample your opinion.
My daughter will soon be going to secondary school so please I need your opinion. day or boarding school which is most preferred? Experienced advice please

Thank you

I have a bias for boarding because I went to boarding and I enjoyed it and it shaped my life. All my children went to boarding.

NL1960:


I have a bias for boarding because I went to boarding and I enjoyed it and it shaped my life. All my children went to boarding.

great, thanks for contribution.

Saao:
great, thanks for contribution.

Just to add that I also have a bias for missionary schools especially Catholic boarding schools in case that is of any help.

NL1960:


Just to add that I also a bias for missionary schools especially Catholic boarding schools in case that is of any help.

ok my major concerns in boarding school are the security of students, gay or lesbianism, and are children more better of? During your days, did you had any such ugly experience? I think love the missionaries boarding school. I really appreciate help

Both have advantages and disadvantages

The advantages of boarding school is your child will learn self independent and taking responsibility as an early age..
Where as the disadvantage is has a parent you might loose that parental bond with your kid because they might be influence by behavior, experience, you have no power to correct or guide... For me boarding school should be for parent who are too busy with there life that they don't channel much energy to there kids needs ..when u say this I don't mean they don't love or care for there kids.. which is beyond paying the bills..

For day shcool is a different scenario entirely, I believe if you are a involved parent who cares not only given is kid education, but care about is emotional being, bound between your kid and you. then day school is the best...

In which way in future whatever trait, character, morals, experience. And person a child becomes... It's falls at the door of the parents..

100% boarding school.

Saao:
ok my major concerns in boarding school are the security of students, gay or lesbianism, and are children more better of? During your days, did you had any such ugly experience? I think love the missionaries boarding school. I really appreciate help

I went to a Unity school but my children went to Catholic schools.

You cannot rule out those vices but the students are encouraged to report any advances. It also starts from the home as you have to continously drum it into the ears of your children. These days in boarding, year sets stay in the same hostel or dormitory. Security ie not an issue.

It is not only in boarding that you have gay and lebianism. Children these days know all these things through technology. So day students can also be affected.

Blackmoran:
Both have advantages and disadvantages

The advantages of boarding school is your child will learn self independent and taking responsibility as an early age..
Where as the disadvantage is has a parent you might loose that parental bond with your kid because they might be influence by behavior, experience, you have no power to correct or guide... For me boarding school should be for parent who are too busy with there life that they don't channel much energy to there kids needs ..when u say this I don't mean they don't love or care for there kids.. which is beyond paying the bills..

For day shcool is a different scenario entirely, I believe if you are a involved parent who cares not only given is kid education, but care about is emotional being, bound between your kid and you. then day school is the best...

In which way in future whatever trait, character, morals, experience. And person a child becomes... It's falls at the door of the parents..

In these days of both parents working or one working while the other operates a shop, that bond is also not really there. I had a neighbour who said she wanted to watch the children like a hawk and refused to send them to boarding even though they could afford it. The man goes to work by 5am and comes back by 9-10pm. The woman drops the children in school and goes to her shop and picks them up, drop them at home and goes back to shop. You need to see what these children do at home when alone.

NL1960:

I went to a Unity school but my children went to Catholic schools.

You cannot rule out those vices but the students are encouraged to report any advances. It also starts from the home as you have to continously drum it into the ears of your children. These days in boarding, year sets stay in the same hostel or dormitory. Security ie not an issue.

It is not only in boarding that you have gay and lebianism. Children these days know all these things through technology. So day students can also be affected.

thank you so much, I really appreciate all contributions. God bless you

Saao:
Hello please family I need to sample your opinion.
My daughter will soon be going to secondary school so please I need your opinion. day or boarding school which is most preferred? Experienced advice please

Thank you

As a female I will say boarding school for these reasons;

1. I learned self sufficiency and hard work in boarding school. Growing up, two of my mother's sisters lived with us, there was a cook, a maid, a driver and what I would call a dry cleaner as well, his task was to wash and iron only, including my clothes and school uniforms.

All of that changed when I went to boarding school, I learnt how to fetch water in a bucket and trek long distance from the school borehole to our dormitories, how to thoroughly clean the dorm toilets, rooms, gutters, etc Boarding school essentially turned me from a lazy child to a hard working one .

2. I learned how to stand up for myself and fight back at bullies/injustice. The senior students at my school (an all girls school) were terrorists! Just mean and cruel for no reason other than their seniority in age and class, omoh by JSS 2 or 3, I had toughened up so bad and began to hit back, I became so stubborn and difficult to deal with, they knew better than to mess with me. My own school mother disowned me because of that but I couldn't be bothered so long as all the mean girls knew to avoid me, I was fine.

3. Boarding school instilled in me a level of independence and responsibility at an early age, where I had to be responsible for myself, personal hygiene, environment and properties. Adulthood has since enhanced those things but boarding school was a learning field where I grew from. That's where I also learned cleanliness and neatness to a fault!

4. Interaction with girls from other states and backgrounds was also a good thing. Cohabiting together, sharing similar routines, fighting and playing together were experiences that helped to build courage, confidence and social skills.

Lesbianism wasn't a thing in my school as such, what we had were friendships where some girls were closer than others and due to how close they were they were called a nickname I can't recall now. But, in my 6 years of being a boarder only two girls were ever caught kissing. I say this to put to rest any fears you may have about boarding schools being a breeding ground for homosexuality, that is not always true or the case in some schools.

Klass99:


As a female I will say boarding school for these reasons;

1. I learned self sufficiency and hard work in boarding school. Growing up, two of my mother's sisters lived with us, there was a cook, a maid, a driver and what I would call a dry cleaner as well, his task was to wash and iron only, including my clothes and school uniforms.

All of that changed when I went to boarding school, I learnt how to fetch water in a bucket and trek long distance from the school borehole to our dormitories, how to thoroughly clean the dorm toilets, rooms, gutters, etc Boarding school essentially turned me from a lazy child to a hard working one .

2. I learned how to stand up for myself and fight back at bullies/injustice. The senior students at my school (an all girls school) were terrorists! Just mean and cruel for no reason other than their seniority in age and class, omoh by JSS 2 or 3, I had toughened up so bad and began to hit back, I became so stubborn and difficult to deal with, they knew better than to mess with me. My own school mother disowned me because of that but I couldn't be bothered so long as all the mean girls knew to avoid, I was fine.

3. Boarding school instilled in me a level of independence and responsibility at an early age, where I had to be responsible for myself, personal hygiene, environment and properties. Adulthood has since enhanced those things but boarding school was a learning field where I grew from. That's where I also learned cleanliness and neatness to a fault!

4. Social interaction with girls from other states and backgrounds was also a good thing. Cohabiting together, sharing similar routines, fighting and playing together were experiences that helped to build confidence.

Lesbianism wasn't a thing in my school as such, what we had were friendships where some girls were closer than others and due to how close they were they were called a nickname I can't recall now. But, in my 6 years of being a boarder only two girls were ever caught kissing. I say this to put to rest any fears you may have about boarding schools being a breeding ground for homosexuality, that is not always true or the case in some schools.

thank you so much for sharing experience. I really appreciate your help

Saao:
ok my major concerns in boarding school are the security of students, gay or lesbianism, and are children more better of? During your days, did you had any such ugly experience? I think love the missionaries boarding school. I really appreciate help

If you train a child in the right way he or she should go (morally and spiritually) you won't have a lot to fret about. Have you done that? If yes, quit fretting just continue to do your part and commit them into God's hands while carrying on with the business of your life.

You can't shield or over protect your child from the harsh realities of this world forever. What you should aim for is raising a child who turns into a well adjusted adult and some of that means exposing them to the different phases of life and allowing them experience that phase without undue interference where you are desperately trying to control the narrative or outcomes.

Saao:
thank you so much for sharing experience. I really appreciate your help

Your baby girl will be fine, dwell on that and it will become your reality. If after one or two years of baording school you don't like what you see, by all means pull her out and try the day option.

The only downside to my boarding school experience was the mean senior girls who made life miserable for junior students.

Most schools today have a low or zero tolerance policy for bullying unlike what we had back in my time so don't worry too much.

A day school is the better option, in my opinion.

There are no advantages a boarding school has that a day school doesn't, and a day school has the only privilege of proximity over the other.

It is a school, a place of learning formally; it's not a place meant to take over the responsibility and role of parents in a child's life. Everything they can potentially learn in a boarding school can be learnt in a day school. A child who is prone to being a sloth or anything of the like would be one over in a boarding school, with much less supervision. The kids who turned out fine and well-adjusted would likely still have turned out the same way they did in the day school. I don't believe the boarding school is much if a 'defining factor' there.

Teenagehood is one of the most confusing, tumultuous and overwhelming period of person's life, and this doesn't even have anything to do with external factors yet. The very experience of going through adolescence can be daunting. Changing body, new feelings about oneself, peer pressure, deciding which values to pick and adapt to - all of these become much easier to work through with the guidance of good and present parents. Sending almost adolescent children off away like that, when they've barely formed their own personality and ideals, with empty "know the kind of house you came from" admonishment doesn't really sit well with me. You'd have no idea of the kind of company they're keeping, and habits they are forming. Things that you can easily pick up and notice and correct about them when they are at home everyday. You will have the choice and authority to raise them the best way possible. Give them responsible tasks to carry out. Help them learn to be kind and cooperative with their siblings. Spend quality family time together. Take them out on weekend. Anything.


The university is still there for them to learn all the independence and self-sufficiency they need to learn. But they'll go to a boarding school, come back home for a while and off to college again.

Where is the time to know them? Where is the time to bond?


I mean, it's one thing to look at the "logical" benefits of boarding school- more time for the parents to attend to work and other duties outside the home, and the child figuring out the world on their own, but personally, for the child, are those worth the emotional neglect and psychological effects?

Children deserve 100% commitment until they are ready to be their own person, but until then, they shouldn't be treated like accessories.

With the advent of social media, we've seen in recent times the atrocities happening in boarding school.

Your daughter needs you in her teenage years more than ever. This is the time to build a relationship with her and teach the child Sex Ed and how to protect herself. You also get a chance to know your child's personality type, the traits she exhibits, and also scrutinize the company she keeps.

The world is dangerous really for children. Parents need to be eagled-eye to protect their loved ones in today's society.

I'm speaking from experience because my mum wanted me to experience boarding school as she did in her days, but that choice was left to me. I wrote common entrance to Federal Government Girls College in my state, also did interview for another school with boarding facilities and a Day School. I just picked the Day School and I turned out fine.

Also had the blank cheque to stay in the school hostel when I gained admission to the University, I rejected it as well. Lol. And only experienced hostel life in my final year because I wanted to experience it and tick it off my list.

There isn't much outside, to be honest.

But yeah, your child's formative years should be under your watchful eyes.

folake4u:
With the advent of social media, we've seen in recent times the atrocities happening in boarding school.

Your daughter needs you in her teenage years more than ever. This is the time to build a relationship with her and teach the child Sex Ed and how to protect herself. You also get a chance to know your child's personality type, the traits she exhibits, and also scrutinize the company she keeps.

The world is dangerous really for children. Parents need to be eagled-eye to protect their loved ones in today's society.

I'm speaking from experience because my mum wanted me to experience boarding school as she did in her days, but that choice was left to me. I wrote common entrance to Federal Government Girls College in my state, also did interview for another school with boarding facilities and a Day School. I just picked the Day School and I turned out fine.

Also had the blank cheque to stay in the school hostel when I gained admission to the University, I rejected it as well. Lol. And only experienced hostel life in my final year because I wanted to experience it and tick it off my list.

There isn't much outside, to be honest.

But yeah, your child's formative years should be under your watchful eyes.

You spoke my mind. Thank you.
@op, sometimes, I wonder how it's so easy for parents to let their teenage children off their sight without thinking twice.
What about love, family bound, value?
Many things are needed and put together in children's upbringing, not only school and book.
Keep your children under your watch. Life is short and the world is not as friendly as it use to be.
Most of the people applauding boarding school here, left there about 10-20 years ago. You can't compare the time, behavior and the amount of information.

At least try your best before ''what will be will be''

Magnoliaa:
A day school is the better option, in my opinion.

There are no advantages a boarding school has that a day school doesn't, and a day school has the only privilege of proximity over the other.

It is a school, a place of learning formally; it's not a place meant to take over the responsibility and role of parents in a child's life. Everything they can potentially learn in a boarding school can be learnt in a day school. A child who is prone to being a sloth or anything of the like would be one over in a boarding school, with much less supervision. The kids who turned out fine and well-adjusted would likely still have turned out the same way they did in the day school. I don't believe the boarding school is much if a 'defining factor' there.

Teenagehood is one of the most confusing, tumultuous and overwhelming period of person's life, and this doesn't even have anything to do with external factors yet. The very experience of going through adolescence can be daunting. Changing body, new feelings about oneself, peer pressure, deciding which values to pick and adapt to - all of these become much easier to work through with the guidance of good and present parents. Sending almost adolescent children off away like that, when they've barely formed their own personality and ideals, with empty "know the kind of house you came from" admonishment doesn't really sit well with me. You'd have no idea of the kind of company they're keeping, and habits they are forming. Things that you can easily pick up and notice and correct about them when they are at home everyday. You will have the choice and authority to raise them the best way possible. Give them responsible tasks to carry out. Help them learn to be kind and cooperative with their siblings. Spend quality family time together. Take them out on weekend. Anything.


The university is still there for them to learn all the independence and self-sufficiency they need to learn. But they'll go to a boarding school, come back home for a while and off to college again.

Where is the time to know them? Where is the time to bond?


I mean, it's one thing to look at the "logical" benefits of boarding school- more time for the parents to attend to work and other duties outside the home, and the child figuring out the world on their own, but personally, for the child, are those worth the emotional neglect and psychological effects?

Children deserve 100% commitment until they are ready to be their own person, but until then, they shouldn't be treated like accessories.

thank you so much for contribution

folake4u:
With the advent of social media, we've seen in recent times the atrocities happening in boarding school.

Your daughter needs you in her teenage years more than ever. This is the time to build a relationship with her and teach the child Sex Ed and how to protect herself. You also get a chance to know your child's personality type, the traits she exhibits, and also scrutinize the company she keeps.

The world is dangerous really for children. Parents need to be eagled-eye to protect their loved ones in today's society.

I'm speaking from experience because my mum wanted me to experience boarding school as she did in her days, but that choice was left to me. I wrote common entrance to Federal Government Girls College in my state, also did interview for another school with boarding facilities and a Day School. I just picked the Day School and I turned out fine.

Also had the blank cheque to stay in the school hostel when I gained admission to the University, I rejected it as well. Lol. And only experienced hostel life in my final year because I wanted to experience it and tick it off my list.

There isn't much outside, to be honest.

But yeah, your child's formative years should be under your watchful eyes.

thanks alot

Magicalsineros:
You spoke my mind. Thank you.
@op, sometimes, I wonder how it's so easy for parents to let their teenage children off their sight without thinking twice.
What about love, family bound, value?
Many things are needed and put together in children's upbringing, not only school and book.
Keep your children under your watch. Life is short and the world is not as friendly as it use to be.
Most of the people applauding boarding school here, left there about 10-20 years ago. You can't compare the time, behavior and the amount of information.

At least try your best before ''what will be will be''

thanks alot,

Sincerely appreciate all of you for your help.

Magicalsineros:
You spoke my mind. Thank you.
@op, sometimes, I wonder how it's so easy for parents to let their teenage children off their sight without thinking twice.
What about love, family bound, value?
Many things are needed and put together in children's upbringing, not only school and book.
Keep your children under your watch. Life is short and the world is not as friendly as it use to be.
Most of the people applauding boarding school here, left there about 10-20 years ago. You can't compare the time, behavior and the amount of information.

At least try your best before ''what will be will be''

Thank you too.

The school can only do the best to their abilities and the teachers are paid to teach and go back home.

Except if the teacher is paid extra to closely monitor a child or where such teacher develops keen interest in the child because of his/her abilities.

Otherwise, raising your child is the best.

People saying boarding school are using their judgement of it 10-20 years ago. Wasn't it under boarding school, that Deeper Life school child was abused?

Kids need close monitoring and easily influenced by their peers, what they see from their gadgets as well.

Day schooling.

Boarding schools, are coded means through which parents are outsourcing their parental responsibilities.

Teenage years/Adolescenthood is the bridge between Childhood and Adulthood, so much happen on that bridge which are critical in how a young person turns out and parents are obligated to be highly involved in that phase of their child's life not shipping the child to a boarding school so they can "have time" to concentrate on other things.

How much are teachers paid to be "responsible parents" to your child for about 39 weeks out of the 52 weeks in a year?

Well, boarding schools are money spinners for their owners as it is a means of relieving some parents, the "stress" of the daily nurturing of a child....a "win-win" for both parties.

Saao:
Sincerely appreciate all of you for your help.

Have you decided what to do now. You yourself did you go to day or boarding school? What is your wife's opinion that is the mother of your daughter.

Dovescenty:


Have you decided what to do now. You yourself did you go to day or boarding school? What is your wife's opinion that is the mother of your daughter.

my decision and my wife are the same. I and my wife attended day. Based on the informations here, we will make decisions. Thanks alot

The day when my children will move out to go to college will come soon enough. I will be crying my eyes out. I am not ready to part from them before this day comes.

Saao:
my decision and my wife are the same. I and my wife attended day. Based on the informations here, we will make decisions. Thanks alot

Okay. Good luck

Boarding schools can be much more abusive environments than day.

Saao:
my decision and my wife are the same. I and my wife attended day. Based on the informations here, we will make decisions. Thanks alot

I went to boarding while my wife went to day. Naturally, I was for boarding while she was for day. So there was a stalemate. Took me time to convince her. It was made easier because most of my son's primary school classmates were going to boarding as some of them already had seniors and cousins in boarding.

My wife was still not that convinced but eventually gave in. She was not herself all night the day the boy was dropped in school for resumption.

On the first visiting day when we got home, she was crying that the boy had changed and I told her that it was just the normal adjustment. By midterm, there were improvements and more later on. She became an apostle of boarding and started recommending it to people. .

The final decision still rest on you and your wife. It takes a lot to convince women to allow a child go to boarding especially women that did not go to boarding.

If you and your wife are not too busy to raise your children, Day school is the best. If you are, go boarding school route, half loaf is better than none.

NL1960:


I went to boarding while my wife went to day. Naturally, I was for boarding while she was for day. So there was a stalemate. Took me time to convince her. It was made easier because most of my son's primary school classmates were going to boarding as some of them already had seniors and cousins in boarding.

My wife was still not that convinced but eventually gave in. She was not herself all night the day the boy was dropped in school for resumption.

On the first visiting day when we got home, she was crying that the boy had changed and I told her that it was just the normal adjustment. By midterm, there were improvements and more later on. She became an apostle of boarding and started recommending it to people. .

The final decision still rest on you and your wife. It takes a lot to convince women to allow a child go to boarding especially women that did not go to boarding.

I enjoyed reading this, it made me laugh and reminded me of my landlord who insisted on sending his son and only boy to a boarding school far from home.

When I asked him why not just send the boy to boarding school in your state of residence instead of sending him far away, he said his mother will still find a way to cuddle the chap because he is within close range. She has over pampered him enough I need to put an end to that so he can begin to grow into a man.

I attended a boarding school.
None of the vices I see on social media happened in mine. Sometimes I wonder if attended a fake one.

However, I WOULD NEVER put my child in one.

Even in your university, you will wake one day to see me in your HOD/Dean's office.