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If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother - Family - Nairaland

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If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by IgboGoat: 10:47am On Jan 16
In reflecting on the hypothetical question of choosing between my mother and my wife, I have come to the conclusion that, in such an unlikely scenario, I would prioritize my mother. This decision stems from a few key observations:

1. Unwavering Support: Mothers consistently give to their children, regardless of their age or circumstances. For example, when I recently embarked on a challenging journey to pursue my master’s degree, my mother contributed significantly, providing financial support of approximately 2 million NGN and foodstuffs for my travel. In contrast, my wife did not contribute to this endeavor but instead focused on financial demands and obligations I needed to fulfill before leaving.


2. Differing Priorities: I have observed that my wife tends to prioritize her family of origin over our household. Her financial contributions often lean toward supporting her parents rather than addressing our shared responsibilities at home.


3. Constructive Support vs. Criticism: A mother’s nurturing nature often involves understanding her child’s weaknesses and helping them grow. Conversely, my wife has been more critical of my shortcomings and has, at times, shared these with her family members, which can feel undermining.


4. Unconditional Love: A mother’s love is deeply rooted and unconditional, while affection in marriage often seems conditional, influenced by circumstances or expectations.



These reflections highlight the enduring sacrifices and selflessness of a mother, making her irreplaceable in my life. While this is a personal perspective, it underscores the unique and invaluable bond between a mother and her child.

Share your views

30 Likes 7 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Bahamas95(m): 1:00pm On Jan 16
No woman would try that rubbish with me.

Was she there when mumsy was nurturing me?

113 Likes 14 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Samantha125(f): 2:36pm On Jan 16
Your mother is supposed to be your father's responsibility and not yours, she nurtured you because it was her duty as a mother.

Or do you now want to be her husband?
Bahamas95:
No woman would try that rubbish with me.

Was she there when mumsy was nurturing me?

22 Likes 9 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Bahamas95(m): 4:48pm On Jan 16
Samantha125:
Your mother is supposed to be your father's responsibility and not yours, she nurtured you because it was her duty as a mother.

Or do you now want to be her husband?
I don't give preferential treatment when it comes to expressing love to whom it's due. But that doesn't give my wife the right to ask me to choose between my mum and her, that's nonsense.

You women should stop taking our simplicity for granted.

111 Likes 13 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Samantha125(f): 5:46pm On Jan 16
But you guys would also be asking us to choose between our fathers and you.
Bahamas95:
I don't give preferential treatment when it comes to expressing love to whom it's due. But that doesn't give my wife the right to ask me to choose between my mum and her, that's nonsense.

You women should stop taking our simplicity for granted.

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Bahamas95(m): 5:59pm On Jan 16
Samantha125:
But you guys would also be asking us to choose between our fathers and you.
Only foolish men do that, I don't waste my time on irrelevant things.


I respect boundaries. You respect my family, I respect yours......How she shows love to her father is not my business.

65 Likes 7 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by ThaThinka: 6:42pm On Jan 16
The place of a mother and that of a wife are completely different! May God not let me marry a foolish woman that would make such a demand.

But if the wife dares, I will miss her. cool

76 Likes 6 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Samantha125(f): 6:48pm On Jan 16
Even if the father wants her to come and work in the family business? Would you still be okay with it?
Bahamas95:
Only foolish men that, I don't waste my time on irrelevant things.


I respect boundaries. You respect my family, I respect yours......How she shows love to her father is not my business.
Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Bahamas95(m): 7:48pm On Jan 16
Samantha125:
Even if the father wants her to come and work in the family business? Would you still be okay with it?
How is that a problem? undecided

As long as she isn't moving back to her father's house and she's performing her motherly/wifely duties at home I ain't got problem with that.

34 Likes 4 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Samantha125(f): 8:21pm On Jan 16
What if her father's business is far from your house, but closer to her father's house and the position her father wants to give her comes with a reasonable salary?

What will you then do? Because there are some ladies who are in this situation as we speak.
Bahamas95:
How is that a problem? undecided

As long as she isn't moving back to her father's house and she's performing her motherly/wifely duties at home I ain't got problem with that.
Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by uncleck: 8:22pm On Jan 16
Questions like this arise only where people marry for the wrong reason. I'll NEVER be in a position where I would have to choose between my wife and my mother. The story begins from dating and wedding.

When I introduce my wife-to-be to my family, nobody has any right whatsoever to tell me not to marry her. I didn't bring her to you for approval, I only brought her to you for introduction. Likewise, when I tell you, my wife, what I want to do for my mother, it is not to seek your approval. Instead, it's just for you to KNOW and if you have any idea on a better way to do it, fine.

I'll NEVER be in a situation where my inlaws would dictate to me what to do. I can honor them with an opportunity to give suggestions on specific matters, but they already know that I'm not under obligation whatsoever to take it.

So in conclusion, both my wife and my mother MUST respect and fear me enough not to put themselves in any contest at all because in the end, I myself will be the winner. Always.

31 Likes 5 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Edoreborn: 8:22pm On Jan 16
My wife oo

1 Like

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by doctor306(m): 8:22pm On Jan 16
My wife actually comes before my mum, but for whatever reason she spills that question from her mouth she automatically relegates herself to a third priority

You don't ask such questions if you see us as one, the only reason she dares to ask such a question is if she sees you as a mumu man who needs his control botton put in Someone Else's hands

And I will give her the bold response “I choose my mum “ and on the night of same day while she is crying ill ask for a divorce

13 Likes

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by frugal(m): 8:22pm On Jan 16
My mom. Since she’s insecure enough to be asking.

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Omoawoke(m): 8:23pm On Jan 16
She go collect uppercut….

I’ve heard of wives divorcing their husbands despite spending many years together, and take away their assets

I’ve heard of wives cheating on their husbands and even betraying them

I’ve never heard of mothers disowning their sons no matter what he does … if it happens, it’s very very rare

48 Likes 8 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by henryadex(m): 8:23pm On Jan 16
My wife
Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by kroger: 8:23pm On Jan 16
Where is A.Y and his wife today. Wife will come and go but your mum is irreplaceable.

20 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by walozanga(m): 8:24pm On Jan 16
Its unnecessary
Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by harmargedon: 8:24pm On Jan 16
That's one of the major reason why you should avoid useless women

14 Likes 2 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by concho(m): 8:25pm On Jan 16
Kk
Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Carndidlaydid(f): 8:25pm On Jan 16
angry


very selfish wife if you ask me....


then when iwas still into the other gender the mutula gave me a condition "you either stop angel dust or you luz me..."


my response to him didnt even tak a sec...


bewteen you and AD who did imeet first?

love is selfish.... if you want me in your world then you have to accept the fact that icant move in empty handed.... create room for my flaws/baggage

1 Like

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Welcum: 8:25pm On Jan 16
grin
Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Kingbharry: 8:25pm On Jan 16
Samantha125:
What if her father's business is far from your house, but closer to her father's house and the position her father wants to give her comes with a reasonable salary?

What will you then do? Because there are some ladies who are in this situation as we speak.

What are you saying? She should move to her father's house because it's closer and leave her duties as a mother and wife to whom?
Would a man leave his home to go live with his parents because it's closer to their family business.
You're not making any sense

37 Likes 3 Shares

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Lanruze: 8:26pm On Jan 16
Thunder will strike her.

My mother is my oxygen & nothing comes close.

What sort of demonic inspired question is that ?

12 Likes

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by hopedey: 8:26pm On Jan 16
Mother..... because you can always get another wife/husband but you can never get another mother.

Mother is supreme.

11 Likes

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by dalass(f): 8:26pm On Jan 16
Samantha125:
Your mother is supposed to be your father's responsibility and not yours, she nurtured you because it was her duty as a mother.

Or do you now want to be her husband?

It is people like you who after becoming an aged mother yourself will be complaining that your son isn't there for you.

What if the mama is a widow? undecided

16 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by helinues: 8:26pm On Jan 16
undecided

What sorts of nonsense question is that

5 Likes

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Gbadugbakun(m): 8:26pm On Jan 16
She's mad. Do I have sex with my mother?
Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by meobizy(f): 8:27pm On Jan 16
You people should start marrying mature women. Only a fifteen or nineteen year old would think up such. Then again, many of you are children too. I now subscribe to Djimon Hounsou’s belief that men should birth children (and likely marry) at forty plus years of age.

5 Likes

Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by Samantha125(f): 8:27pm On Jan 16
Men leave their households all the time to go and work far from home... Some of you guys have left your wives in Nigeria and haven't been back in years.
Kingbharry:


What are you saying? She should move to her father's house because it's closer and leave her duties as a mother and wife to whom?
Would a man leave his home to go live with his parents because it's closer to their family business.
You're not making any sense
Re: If Your Wife Asks You To Choose Between Her And Your Mother by dinero101(m): 8:27pm On Jan 16
IgboGoat:
In reflecting on the hypothetical question of choosing between my mother and my wife, I have come to the conclusion that, in such an unlikely scenario, I would prioritize my mother. This decision stems from a few key observations:

1. Unwavering Support: Mothers consistently give to their children, regardless of their age or circumstances. For example, when I recently embarked on a challenging journey to pursue my master’s degree, my mother contributed significantly, providing financial support of approximately 2 million NGN and foodstuffs for my travel. In contrast, my wife did not contribute to this endeavor but instead focused on financial demands and obligations I needed to fulfill before leaving.


2. Differing Priorities: I have observed that my wife tends to prioritize her family of origin over our household. Her financial contributions often lean toward supporting her parents rather than addressing our shared responsibilities at home.


3. Constructive Support vs. Criticism: A mother’s nurturing nature often involves understanding her child’s weaknesses and helping them grow. Conversely, my wife has been more critical of my shortcomings and has, at times, shared these with her family members, which can feel undermining.


4. Unconditional Love: A mother’s love is deeply rooted and unconditional, while affection in marriage often seems conditional, influenced by circumstances or expectations.



These reflections highlight the enduring sacrifices and selflessness of a mother, making her irreplaceable in my life. While this is a personal perspective, it underscores the unique and invaluable bond between a mother and her child.

Share your views
I believe you’ve said it all

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