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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? (2293 Views)
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Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by ximarro(m): 8:13am On Nov 05, 2014 |
Hello Guys, I've thought for sometime of creating a thread like this but haven't had the time...thank God i'm doing it now. It's not a strange thing to see that in some homes, d husband is in charge of preparing the market list as against the wife which is usually the norm. Those of you whose fathers do that and wives in the house whose husbands do that, please share your experiences especially if it is acceptable in our African Culture. In my own opinion, I do not see it as the right thing to do. |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Nobody: 12:04pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
ximarro: It's bullshyte How does a man have such time? As far as my dad was concerned, just say how much you need....the details bore him Maybe poverty can cause that kinda attitude in a man sha but it's too un-manly 2 Likes |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by jaybee3(m): 12:07pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
Rigidity in marriage is a No No. |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Nobody: 12:15pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
If he is putting in his money he has a right to write the list. The idea of topping off on item prices is fraudulent and i wouldn't blame any man who notices this and takws charge. 1 Like |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by coogar: 12:24pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
ximarro: it's a horrible attitude.... men shouldn't be bothered about the details. let the wife handle kitchen duties. if she says it's $100 then its $100. give her the money & move on. if you cannot trust your wife with petty cash, you shouldn't have married her in the first place. 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Nobody: 1:05pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
coogar:later you and your ilks will say a man should also help in the kitchen. |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by coogar: 1:15pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
TribalEAST: why should he? |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Nobody: 1:41pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
alutacontinua: |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by iconize(m): 2:36pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
alutacontinua: Yeah, poverty and mistrust are what causes a man to write the shopping list. |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by eleojo23: 3:02pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
Rather than writing the list, I suggest he estimate how much the items needed would cost and then give the money accordingly. And writing the list doesn't always mean that he's stingy. Some men are very much involved in household/kitchen 'business'. 1 Like |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by MMotimo: 3:12pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
ximarro: Writing a list does not necessarily mean the writer is also the shopper. I do 90% of the grocery shopping but all members of the household are welcome to update the list on my the special folder/file I created on my cell phone for that purpose. If you want me to buy it, better make sure you get it on my phone. If I go shopping and it's not on the list, chances are I'm not buying it. Perhaps the wife in your story is not very organized and it's easier for her husband to write the list. Perhaps he even haggles better so he buys the groceries himself if it saves the household money. I call that prudence. 2 Likes |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Nobody: 5:25pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
I hope after writing, he will go and buy and cook. |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by tpia6: 5:39pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
whatever works for them. |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by LewsTherin: 6:08pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
tpia6: Word. If the wife isn't complaining, what's your business in who writes it? My Lady and I work on the list together and we go shopping together if we do not use a shopping service. And there are times I do the lists myself cos I work better with the terms and conditions of the shopping service. So who cares who writes the list? Stereotyping roles in families is one of the reasons there are so many issues in families. Let the better person handle any job. Or the more opportuned person. Why mandate roles based on gender? This is where communication and trust should comes in I tire bo 6 Likes |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by cococandy(f): 7:34pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
LewsTherin: 1 Like |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Fkforyou(m): 8:43pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
It depends,but IMO.....I think such man is very frugal. |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by bukatyne(f): 9:18pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
ximarro: Next time you see such, please arrest them |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by bukatyne(f): 9:20pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
LewsTherin: This nailed it Once again, weldone 2 Likes |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Nobody: 9:24pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
LewsTherin: |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Nobody: 10:16pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
LewsTherin: Hian! You be economist? |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by ximarro(m): 10:29pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
U see guys, it may sound funny but this is what goes on in many homes and it is one of the causes of marital problems. I believe a man should tell the wife that he has a particular amount at hand and let the wife be the one that will know how to list the items and the prices to accommodate the amount the husband has. 1 Like |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by tpia6: 12:06am On Nov 06, 2014 |
LewsTherin: no, i dont see why it should be a big deal as long as both parties are ok with it. |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by tpia6: 12:07am On Nov 06, 2014 |
ximarro: when you marry, do that. |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Stillfire: 12:11am On Nov 06, 2014 |
What exactly is African culture when Africa boasts of uncountable cultures? 2 Likes |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by EfemenaXY: 2:56am On Nov 06, 2014 |
Stillfire: Haha! @op: Absolutely nothing wrong with it. It simply means the man is "in tune" with his family's needs. It also shows to a large extent that he is quite handy in the kitchen and probably a good cook too. What woman wouldn't want a man who knows his way round the kitchen (and cooking pot)? Rather than one who'll depend on you every single day of his life on you to cook for him? Even if you're unwell / indisposed? 2 Likes |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Pavore9: 6:25am On Nov 06, 2014 |
Stillfire:Abeg ask them! African culture is so diverse, like in Kenya u see wives not bearing their husbands name, are they not Africans? 3 Likes |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by bukatyne(f): 7:36am On Nov 06, 2014 |
Stillfire: I guess the custodians of African culture in NL will have to help us here 2 Likes |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Agrika: 8:52am On Nov 06, 2014 |
Personally I feel it's not good...me I prepare the list then show Oga...he then goes through it and make some "adjustments" |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Stillfire: 11:18am On Nov 06, 2014 |
bukatyne: Pavore9: This should be a topic on it's own, the way we just group everyone in Africa- the African man, the African woman, really when we all come from different cultures. 3 Likes |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by bukatyne(f): 11:27am On Nov 06, 2014 |
Stillfire: I tire when I hear African this and that! The funny thing is that it is not used to refer to progressive stuffs; it is backward stuffs that they can easily yap "This is Africa" Shior 2 Likes |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Pavore9: 11:52am On Nov 06, 2014 |
Stillfire:So true. |
Re: Fathers Who Write Market List: Acceptable In Our Culture? by Amuga(f): 5:45pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
[quote author=eleojo23 post=27750347]Rather than writing the list, I suggest he estimate how much the items needed would cost and then give the money accordingly. And writing the list doesn't always mean that he's stingy. Some men are very much involved in household/kitchen 'business'.[/quote] Very much involve in kitchen bussiness abi? He should be prepared to cook the food he bought. |
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