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Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 9:05pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
Compilation of my favourite Punchlines on NL...similes/pun/metaphors/wordplays/ one liners...you name it.... In no particular order...... Streetwize -- **** Ill grab d constitution and take d[i] law[/i] in my hands ***I could staple a calendar to ya skull . . . . and u still wont carry d day/ **** ffuck your offences/ my fist hit fast...like a bundle of blessings/ till ur so bleeped. . . u'll "self-service" on ya eyes, ears and nose. . . but still won't 'come' to ya senses/ ** den rip ya bones out ya body. . . and play 'tic tac toe". . . on ya (Exo) X-O skeleton/ ***Bleep ya bastard plans/ ya flows only test waters Then branch out. . . when I dice ya face in 4 . . . and send u to head-quarters **** Ur "drunk" with pride?. . . . I'll dangle u 4rm a bridge and make you "hang-over'/ Mikuz -- **** so when Im shooting new tecs/ like teams recording a 'home and away defeat' . . he ll be 'losing his two legs' **** Then this beating ll be without MEASURE . . cos Ill 'beat him within an INCH of his life' . . till he 'gets a FOOT in the grave'!!/ Mailmac -- ** knowlegde beyond human's comprehension/ wisdom like Solomon's but in a more modern dimension/ ** i don't dream, i think of reality while i sleep ** Ibime *** if ya think ya prepared. . . blow ya brains. . and kill the idea!/ ***** Ill smash his face into a 'grandfather clock' . . . . to give him a good beating. . . .for 'old time' sake!!/ **** And if you talking beef, change the subject. . . or fail the exam!/ **** The information/ is that ya wife’s fornicating/ My seed's in ya family tree. . . call it cross- pollination!/ **** I lynch this fella/ then put his díck in a blender/ to switch his gender/ stab his feet with broken bottles. . . and make him walk on 'glass shoes' . . . . like Cinderella!!/ I SMASH YA TEAM/ TRAMPOLINE on ya back and CRACK YA SPLEEN/ Then spray ya ‘blood’ over ya T.V. . . now you got a ‘PLASMA’ SCREEN!!/ Ya girls name is JULIA, YES?/ You TRULY ARE BLESSED/ But u ain’t got monopoly on her BEAUTIFUL bosoms. . . . it’s ‘COMMUNITY CHEST’!/ **** My gun is a gay/ It 'ejaculates noisily' . . when he gets shot in the @ss/ . . cos my 'magnum c[i]u[/i]m laude'. . .like Im[i] 'top of the class'[/i]!!/ *** The dumb nitwit. . . .reading bible with a microscope. . . .tryna 'magnify the Lord'!!/ **** If this faggót wanna beef/ I’ll stab him in the knees/ then slice 'both ears' and 'one eye' . . . . so he believe 'none of what he hear'. . . . and only 'half of what he see' !!/ ThePrekky ---- ***** My mantle is bigger, I trample enigmas/ way ur sis 'stalks' me, bet d tramp wish I 'stick' her/ plus I'm a star, men . .but bïtch lacks 'style'. .so wen i de- flower her, she's left to handle d 'stigma'!!/ **** NL's Unbeaten, my every shot results in killings/ with stun gun that finish twerps/ so in the long run I'll finish first/ cos Im usain bolt. . blazing every track . .while u barely cover laps. . .like Bum-shots & mini skirts!/ Im more revered than priests/ but any corny trick @ fans to intrigue or deceive/ will hav u disfigured & ditched/ you kicking gud metaphors is a paradox . .but when I put nines to your mouth. . . it's no figure of speech!/ *** so how ma gats ready spray/ I'll defy his altar. . .& 'cross his temple'. . .on ash wednesday!!/ blaqbones ***** . . .Reaches bethlehem, hides inna manger, he's LOST...WATCHING/ Then I light it up, the 'Messiah' of rap. . . 'Burn in a manger'. . .So GOD LOVING!!/ buh once it STOPS BURNING/ I'd take his ashes to the temple, dance to the front. . . .and offer it as BURNT OFFERING!!!/ ****Sony Speakers BURSTING UP WITH 'DRAKE'!/ I 'started from the bottom', DROPPED IT ON THE FACE/ ...Sid calling, am like 'Hold on, we going home', she F.UCKING RUNS IN SHAME!/ Mehn I Banged the shi.t out her, since then 'NOTHING WAS THE SAME'!!!/ **** . .Then I sling Slugs at this RAPPER'S FOOT/ 'Clear His Legs' and his FLAT @SS TOO/ . .Then sling anoda round the Neck. . .clear his throat like its BABA BLUE!!/.... ***-U possesed!! spending every NIGHT IN EVIL MEETINGs/ . . .The winch crew ibime MIGHT BE EVEN LEADING/ . . . .Buh no ish bro. . .I might bring a "honda baby boy" today. . .buh soon enuf I'd "DRIVE THE EVIL SPIRIT"!!!/ **** 007bruce ---- Stucked in an 'IBTC elevator', then he might be 'up- to-standard'/ if you aint denounced the "Dark Lord" then what stuff is you?/ You're just a "cat puzzled" If your stans ever call you "Tom riddles"/ Emaprince **** I'm the bright and coolest G/..who spits on the mic to chew mcs/and i might knife and slew the mik/ But I'll hang him on a pole 20foot long . . . now that's the 'height of cruelty'!!/ He's a Moderator . . but this 'monkey post' is not lucrative . .street footballs!!/ *** Kr0ne --- *** .So whoever brought u this pain, slap him/ I can top the highest glad in his kindred/ but for thinking he will reach there/ I'll remind u I'm Arthur Wilfred. . . my bars hover above ur head with a caution sign. . .KEEP OUT OF THE REACH OF CHILDREN!!!/ my killer fashion is plainly mean/ once I squeeze and spray the lead/ . .bullets will leave more tears in ya knees than crazy jeans!// coogar •Tough questions - Did your prophet forecast obstacle?/Was it revealed you would need a top class hospital?/Don't envy...This is expected when a Tomcat talks to you/Your play with words are horrible....Like Kuje prison detainee, you are behind the worst bars possible/ Thunderstorm --- **** Now he's beefing Mikuz ..for making a further resistance/ how he'd get murdered in instance/ but few months ago Mikuz showed that "You're sooo far from the truth" . . The speed of your lies wont cover the distance!!/ .... I couldn't copy all...if you got yours, please add.... 22 Likes 12 Shares |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 9:10pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
Tags; Ibime Coogar Mikuz Emaprince Guykhena Limerick Kr0ne Ksslib Elymaxiimus Fuckyouhard YoungDaNaval Lagunna Yeyenatu 007Bruce Ojoawo, thunderstorm Elvisonjack2 Deepthoughts Warriblood Jigsawkillah Iceskidd Wrongturn Ckushy Testerfuze teddybiyasi Sammcarter Geoxpress Heywhizzy Captainflash Willofsteel Sosiqdude Richommie Rapacme. 1 Like |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by taiwoflb: 9:12pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
[PHOTOS] Woman walks STARK NAKED around New York and most people didn’t even notice SEE MORE PICS: http://.com.ng/index.php/more-news/odd-news-reports/item/1330-photos-woman-walks-stark-naked-around-new-york-and-most-people-didn-t-even-notice [img]http://.com.ng/media/k2/items/cache/dc52d5c5f54b7db2dfd2aae465dc6ccd_M.jpg[/img] |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by kudoxs(m): 9:20pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
NICE! 1 Like |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 9:22pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
. 1 Like |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Ibime(m): 9:29pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
You missed out Streetwize greatest ever line. Ohms law toh bad. 'current flow' and 'potential difference'. I don't have the phrasing here with me. 2 Likes |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 9:32pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
Ibime: lol ..I was gonna add that...thanks... Those old verses you penned are skilless/ and show proverbial weakness and ya current flow. . . Im sorry!! . . . shows no potential difference/ 14 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Ibime(m): 9:34pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
While thís liar joke and banter/ I fire flows with anger/ till he acquire myeloma plasma/ cos one punch will knock him out. . . but if I give him 'two more'. . .he'll be diagnosed with 'cancer'/ 11 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by LooNat11kk: 9:35pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
None of my bars are here, I suggest yu take this post down (-___-) |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 9:38pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
LooNat11kk: I couldnt post all..cos of the nl word limit...add yours and those lines that made you smile... |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 9:41pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
Ibime: this is your line.... ![]() please do mention lines from we Rookies that made you smile, nod or made your heart skip a beat.... Elymaxiimus fuckyouhard teddybiyasi 007bruce darkrebel guykhena ksslib wrongturn. etc 1 Like |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 9:48pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
Wrongturn--- One, TWO, BUCKLE MA SHOE/ and here come my GOONS RUNNING YA HOOD/ you alone and helpless. DUDE, WHATCHU GON DO?/ would he STOOP, CALL IT A TRUCE?'/ or would the FOOL SUMMON HIS CREW?/ .... "TEAMCURVES!!" he might bark. But tha wud only put him in a bad shape to LOSE ...RO-KI-A-TU!/ 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by sosiqdude(m): 9:54pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
What here all about... It's nice |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 9:59pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
sosiqdude: these are my favourites lines from different emcees here.... .post 3 or 4 lines you like too |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by kr0ne(m): 10:01pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
Ibime: He tried casting demons/ but he ain’t 'P Square'. . . .so they left the pastor bleeding/ chanting “Peter we know, Paul we know. . . but who are you?”. . .as they slapped and beat him!!/ I don't like to remember this line any time I'm on steering. E don make me jam police car before for CMS. It's a perfect direct shot the opponent whose name starts with P and he's almost like a pastor too 8 Likes |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 10:04pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
kr0ne: you ve' said it before. .you really like that line.... I don't know why streetwize hasn't come online since...I would like to see another - streetwise vs ibime final brawl.....am gonna bet my money on Street ![]() |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by sosiqdude(m): 10:05pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
iamaromolaeran:You are back aromolaeran..welcome..I like this ya idea |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by mikuz(m): 10:07pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
Nice, I go sticky the thread after the tournament. |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 10:07pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
sosiqdude: I have always been around...my new moniker is Darkrebel ... |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by mikuz(m): 10:09pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
kr0ne: That punch funny no be small. Tf person wey say Ibime no be madman. 1 Like |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by kr0ne(m): 10:12pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
iamaromolaeran: |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by sosiqdude(m): 10:15pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
iamaromolaeran: I know |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by LooNat11kk: 10:15pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
Illscripts Stop acting like yur fists are hot/i've always known yu to be a "fake boxer" like okrika shorts/ ema prince laughed when he said he free from sin/...and dude was possessed by the demon king/ But now it's clear that the born again prekky is 'past or' . . the demon just took a temporary leave from him!!!/ 5 Likes |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by kr0ne(m): 10:16pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
iamaromolaeran:Yeah, it's not just about the punch, it's the comic effect. I tried imagining Prekky attempting to cast demons and how the demons rebuked him instead, quoting from the scripture. The same with Wrongturn's opener. I envisioned Guykhena campaigning for Rok#atu and yelling 'Teamcurves!' ![]() ![]() |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by kr0ne(m): 10:18pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
LooNat11kk:Lmao! I've not seen this line o ![]() ![]() |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 10:21pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
kr0ne: I like the comical aspect but i prefer the horror core/ deadly,merciless strikes ...e.g.... he giving me strife/ I'll gut the pig with a knife/ And he'll be 2.5 centimetres from death . . . . when I beat him. . . 'within an inch of his life' !!/ I make vets bleed. . . Wait. . . let’s see/ This fake Jet Li/ will get his 'head severed'. . . at 'break-neck speed' !/ Contort his body into a circle . . .when I take Prek’s 'feet'/. . .and make em touch his 'head' . . . just to 'make ends meet' !!/ 6 Likes |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 10:24pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
Mikuz --- i outmuscle the freak/ . . Send 'Abia Warriors' to cross him with sticks/ But after they spill his blood on the streets/ Ill rip and flip his vascular organ in the air . . till they hear his 'Heart land' . . like 'a club in the league'!/ do you know what they call this type of punchline kr0ne.? they call it *gunshot * or wickedness ![]() 2 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by kr0ne(m): 10:26pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
iamaromolaeran:I know, it's your style. But I enjoy comedy a lot, anything that can make me laugh |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by mikuz(m): 10:26pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
his LIES AND BLABBERS/ that he RIDES AND HAMMERS/ thisagege bread eater,DISGUISED SHAWARMA/but when krone blew his cover, and DEFILED THE 'BASTARD'/ he came out in public and DENIED HIS FATHER!!!/ - Wrongturn 3 Likes |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by kr0ne(m): 10:28pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
iamaromolaeran:Lol! Eerie! I'll take my time and dig the archives, coz I'd love to post humorous lines here |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Nobody: 10:29pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
kr0ne: lol ..me too....what makes me laugh is the way emcees here describe what they will do to their opponent.... like that one emaprince did..the height of cruelty thing...I just dey shake my head |
Re: Compilation Of My Favourite NL Lines by Limerick: 10:31pm On Nov 14, 2014 |
mikuz:tf me be that. |
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