pogolowa1:
I realy don't know how to say this but I sure do need help.I have been married for 2years now amd its like I got married to the devil her self. Right now I sent her to her parents house to help us rethink this whole marriage thing. Below is a list of things she does that makes me regret marrying her.
She gets angry at every liltle thing, and when she does she gives me cold shoulders for days.
She is very deep she dosent make friends and she wouldn't want you to neither.
She does not cook in the house cause she her self doesn't eat much.
She hates been around people including my family members which has caused a lot of problems.
Am not saying am perfect but she makes me regret ever seeing her.
I knew she had all this in her but she kept on promising she would change.
Now the situation is I just can't see my self living with her cause her sturbborness makes me go voilent on her. But I don't know how I would do without her. Please Nlanders pls what should I do.

pogolowa1:
I knew she had all this in her but she kept on promising she would change.

Nashville:
Bros, I am not judging you but I am only helping you to think through this. Coogar has made a very valid point - you knew she was like that yet you married her. You have said for better, for worse; so now you should think of making things better and not worse.

First of all, your wife is not a house help you can place on suspension or even hire or fire. It is very unwise to send her to her parent's house. Your house is her house; she belongs in your house and not her parents house, so you should never send her packing. You are the man of the house so you should show leadership and not act like a dictator.

Secondly, if she did not hit you, then you should not hit her. It is wrong for you to beat you wife no matter her stubbornness. She is a human being that deserves to be heard and treated like the queen you want for a wife.

Your wife may be an introvert - nothing wrong with that. She may be very shy or have some self esteem issues. I also think she doesn't communicate properly. Your job as the head of the family is to help her be a better person. Don't just leave her to suffer - help her. Build her self confidence.

My advice - send for her immediately and work things out with her. Both of you should apologise to each other as you have both done wrong. Give her time to change and you change too. Nobody is perfect and nobody should be chased out of their house.

Hope this helps.

zeb04:
Divorce is an option

zeb04:
Divorce is an option

zeb04:
Divorce is an option

moca:
Coogar, r u telling him to fast and pray when he has already started pane beating her and has sent her to her parents?

Dude don't wanna feel guilty so want pity party.
And oops another perfect lady is around d corner scheming and fueling
Na today!

Abeg I want chop abacha and ugba.
Who go helep me?
Edwife come and post good abacha and ugba for me o.
As d thing dey disturb me for belle, make I dey chop with eyes only
Edwife o!
(This lady will kill me today)

Sorry o @op, my head is dumb now.
Only abacha e dey see.

kuderrich:
shoooo, I dey fear you oh. He saw her like dat b4 he got married to her. He shud bear d consequence, and he mst uphold d oath he swore on d wedding day.

SeunEatsGARRI:


Here is what you'll do...I guess u're high. This. Is a family section, if u don't have any important tin to say here, I suggest u stay calm.[color=#990000][/color]

















Go to the market,
Buy 2 cups of GARRI
Buy one peak milk
Buy sugar
Buy ground nut

Prepare her a Seun Osewa special delicacy of GARRI,


Thanks me later

coogar:


you have made your bed, kindly lie in it. i have no iota of pity for anyone who see flaws in their partners before walking the aisle, press ahead to marry the partner, only to then start complaining after 24 months.

you have signed for better for worse with this woman & that includes worse behaviour(anger, cold shoulders, disrespecting your family members, kitchen-lazy, unfriendly attitude, etc). you cannot complain, bro.

keep fasting & praying!

pogolowa1:


Thank you for ur coment. I see my self as the emotionly weak one here. I have always tried talking to her but she keep telling she would change right now I feel if she values me she would have tried making amends. She still trows tantrums from her parents house.
I forgot to mention herr mum is a control freek she has subdued her father to the extent his family members don't associate with him again.
If you know how a boarder line personality disorder makes a man do u would understand where I am now.
I wish I could change her realy wish I could.
Am hurting instead of her to be hurting. I feel she is taking advantage of my soft heart. Can someone drop a number so I could call anybody. I would like to discuss personaly and explain some thingd

Zikamax:
This may sound funny but its working. Make her get jelouse of u, pretend as if u have another woman. All you have to do is to make sure u play your part well, never let her suspect or find out its all a fake plane. If possible set up your phone to a ringing mode-15 minutes interval, always pick up the phone, answer as if a female is at the other end. Tell your phone u are on your way call it any pet name of your choice Then dress up clean, I mean CLEAN and leave the house. Come back late at night but make sure u eat out. Feel happy and fulfilled, take a cool shower and go to bed. Repeat same the next day, believe me she will seek for peace, she will know the value of having a man (husband) around her. She will realize your worth. What a woman!

pogolowa1:


I did all it did not work. Infact It got worst she just picked her phone and called her mother and told her I was cheating on her. And d mother called me and started insulting me.

pogolowa1:


I did all it did not work. Infact It got worst she just picked her phone and called her mother and told her I was cheating on her. And d mother called me and started insulting me.

Zikamax:
Ooooooh...I see, so she really took afer her mother. Like mother like daughter. She lack proper home training. You may go a seperate ways if there hasn't been any child involved. U are not meant for each other so better seperate now you still have life left for you. If you guys keep on living like hell oneday you might do something to her or she to you which you will regret for the rest of your life.

FynBabe:
Pls, can you tell us why you sent her to her parent's house? I'm asking because I don't see any of the things you listed as enough reason to send your wife packing or maybe your family and friends adviced you to do so?

pogolowa1:

With all those characters she constantly put up told the parents that she needed to change her attitude. And I felt if we give our self a break we could have time to think it through.
After work I hangout late just to ensure I spend a lot of time alone before I go home and face angry wife. Force my self to drink so I could sleep without thinking much.

pogolowa1:

With all those characters she constantly put up told the parents that she needed to change her attitude. And I felt if we give our self a break we could have time to think it through.
After work I hangout late just to ensure I spend a lot of time alone before I go home and face angry wife. Force my self to drink so I could sleep without thinking much.

FynBabe:
Pls, for how long has she been away? Don't you think her staying @ her parents' place would make her even more stubborn? I hope you didn't tell her parents you are no longer interested in the marriage. Get your wife back and groom her to be what you want, sir. If not for any thing, for your beautiful daughter's sake. I hope the matter has not gotten to an irredeemable stage.

pogolowa1:

Yes its making her more sturbborn. Bought my baby food she rejected it just last week. Said I sent them late. The thing is that we nigerians don't belive in shrinks the only thing pple think about its marine spirits.
Most times I just wonder why I had to go down this lanen why it ought to be me at all.
Even the dad is aking me to manage his daughter how can I do dat for the rest of my life. For the beating thing I last laid my hands on her last year. Not that I regularly beat her I learnt that if I always beat her that shows am emotionaly weak so I avoid her a lot.

FynBabe:
Both of you can still work things out. What does your family think about all these? Let her leave her parents' house ASAP. Stay together and resolve your issues. Don't worry, this is nothing compared to what some people have been through and came out stronger. All the best.