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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / Poems For Review / Oh Life Don't Take Me Young(a Poem) (618 Views)
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Oh Life Don't Take Me Young(a Poem) by merit12(f): 1:05pm On Dec 19, 2014 |
Oh life don't take me young. The poor two children weep bitterly, As they lay beside their lifeless parent, They have refused to be console, That have got my thinking about my life, Hmmmm life can wicked , Life can be fun, Life,still can be a teacher, Life can be handle with care, Life still can be fragile, Life,I wish I get to choose how I live it, Would have love to have a perfect life, Oh life don't take me young. Cc EverestDeBliu and texanomaly gloriaz and laykorn This my own assignment.I will be writting more I need some corrections It the free verse Thank you (S |
Re: Oh Life Don't Take Me Young(a Poem) by Nobody: 1:10pm On Dec 19, 2014 |
Wow! This is awesome for a first try. Imagination doing the job! ![]() Just that, your punctuation. There's a rule. Punctuate your poem just like you'd punctuate your prose work. You used commas all through even when a period was needed or no sign at all. I saw some typos too. Apart from that, you're awesome. Keep it up! I'm awaiting a poem on something black ![]() Ayamlaykorn |
Re: Oh Life Don't Take Me Young(a Poem) by timpaker(m): 1:18pm On Dec 19, 2014 |
Nice one... But try and correct some typos Overall, you did great... Good day. |
Re: Oh Life Don't Take Me Young(a Poem) by merit12(f): 5:14pm On Dec 19, 2014 |
Tanchu I finally have a black poem laykorn: |
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